Still Here

what you allow continues. -> what you tolerate continues. -> what you show interest in is what brings more of that interest into your life. -> to often express an emotion like anger or joy will make people test it, tread its waters, treat you with that emotion in mind, thus making you choose between rejecting or accepting their understanding of you, instead of being neutral on it. -> if you get involved in fights and debate, more fights come to your doorstep. to think solemnly about your existence is to see answers and questions in everything. to participate in anything is to be enmeshed in it, touched back by it. -> to be bothered deeply by something personally repulsive is to touch it back when it tries to hold you, instead of washing your hands. -> you can work against something without allowing it to touch you inside. -> what you allow inside you continues.

LIGHT OF MY DARK WORLD.

boyfriend!mark | fluff | boyfriend au | cw: fears of the dark & thunder

note ; there's a reference to 'nothing' by bruno major in this, but it's actually based on the lyrics of 'lights' by got7's yugyeom , aka soty!!!! the lyrics make me cry LOL so i had to write this <3

taglist ; @soobin-chois (lmk in comments, asks, or dms if you’d like to be added to my taglist! ^^)

Thanks to a sudden blackout that was unexpected but not unwelcomed, your apartment was completely pitch black.

Which probably explains why it's taking Mark such a long time to get to your shared bedroom.

"Markie? Hurry up, I'm waiting!" you called out impatiently, fingers tapping against the top of your battery-run radio.

You head your boyfriend huff loudly, stumbling over something and almost tripping.

"I hope you know that it's very difficult to walk through the dark without glasses and bad eyesight." he complains.

"Can't relate," you tease as you finally hear him enter the room and walk up to you. "I didn't stay up secretly reading Harry Potter under the blankets as a child."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say." he deadpans, chuckling.

Reciprocating his laugh, you peck his cheek before running your fingers over the front of your radio, each button and its function long burned into your memory out of familiarity.

"I'll play a Bruno Major CD, is that okay?" you asked, fiddling with the radio as you tried to load the disk.

Mark offers a hum in response, arms wrapping around your waist from the back as he rests his head on your shoulder. He's squinting as he tries to figure out what you were doing through his blurry vision.

"You know, you sound really excited to dance in the dark for someone who's usually scared of it." Mark notes, recalling how you would get really quiet and clingy in the dark.

"Oh, I'm not scared of the dark anymore," you laughed airily, dismissing his note with a wave of your hand. The other one hits the 'Play' button on the radio.

Almost immediately, 'Nothing' starts to play, scratchy intro of the heart-swelling song filling up your dark apartment.

"Really? That's not what you were saying last week during the thunderstorm though." he teases.

"That was different." you retort, scoffing. "Thunder was involved, and I'm still scared of that."

Mark can only laugh at how adorably stubborn you are when it comes to admitting your fears, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

The feeling of his soft lips against your skin makes you smile, melting into Mark's embrace.

And you wonder if he knows that he's the reason you weren't scared of the dark anymore, and you were sure that you'd get over your fear of thunder soon with him around.

The tight hugs in bed while he rubbed your back and reminded you that there was nothing to be scared of, the warmth of his hands in yours as he pressed small kisses to your knuckles and whispered funny stories to distract you, everything.

Little by little, Mark had totally transformed your fear of the dark into nothing but trust, calmness, and an endless love to be with him all night.

He colored you warm - even your surroundings - and you no longer were the frail, gray canvas you were, brave yellows and peaceful blues replacing them instead.

"And besides," you whisper, wrapping your arms around Mark's waist.

"You're the light of my dark world, so even when the night comes, I'm not afraid."

© neolovesneo, 2022.

a day with the Lee's - Mark Lee au

Hi! it's been a while 😅😊 i'm just having a hard time writing these days hence the lack of content, sorry :( you can send any request/recommendations for a scenario, I'll see what I can do😊 thank u for the love you've shown this blog even when I'm inactive, i do miss writing too.

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2022 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(pic not mine. credit to original owner)

It's a busy morning in the Lee household, not because you had work but because it's the first time your daughter would go to daycare. Even though you and Mark have already done this before with your oldest, Minjung, you can tell he's more wary and a bit on edge sending his youngest and only daughter to school

"Did you get Min-jee's backpack?" you ask Mark, seeing him come down the stairs.

"Huh oh yea wait a second" Mark jogs back the same way he came from, chuckling at your husband before turning your head back to little Minjee, helping her put her shoes on.

This is like a normal morning for you, Minjung leaves earlier for school then Minjee wakes up and you get her ready for the day. Now she's finally old enough to go to daycare, you were excited to watch your little girl meet kids her age and socialize but Mark on the other hand thought it's too early.

"Are we sure she's ready for this? We can still wait a year more" he says, walking down the stairs and taking the seat beside his daughter. Immediately she reaches out to hold her dad, you thought Minjung was a dada's boy oh you were wrong. Minjee is way more attached to Mark then her brother. Even as a baby, she only ever wants to be held by her dad and Mark loved every second of it.

Maybe it's the reason why he's more affected about sending Minjee to daycare.

"She'll be fine, she needs more friends her age. Plus I can tells she's getting bored being home all the time. Right, love?" you say lightly pinching her cheeks

"Mama, woo" she says referring to the snoopy plushie her uncle Jungwoo gave her when she was a baby, the name woo kinda stuck so now she calls it woo. Minjee takes that stuff toy with her everywhere she goes.

"It's here, Jee. Come on, we need to go" Mark says before scooping her up in his arms, you take the backpack and followed the two out the door.

Mark puts Minjee in her carseat while you settle in the passenger seat. Then the three of you were off.

The whole ride to the daycare you can tell Mark was growing more and more anxious, repeatedly tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, his legs shaking.

"Mark baby, she'll be fine" you smile at your husband.

"Yea I know, I just... How are you not as emotional right now?" he asks you

"I think I got most of it out with Minjung. I can still remember bawling my eyes out in the parking lot when we left him on his first day" you answer, reaching over to rest your hand on his knee.

"She'll do great, we know the teacher's here they'll take good care of her"

"I know I know"

Letting out a chuckle, you let him be.

When you finally got to the daycare, Mark parks the car but made no move to step out.

"Babe?"

"I can't do this" he mumbles under his breath

"Huh? What did you say?"

"Baby, I don't think I can leave her here. Let's just wait one more year" he said turning to you, this time you see his eyes almost close to tears. Again this made you giggle, taking his face between your hands before giving him a sweet short kiss.

"She'll be fine, who knows maybe she'll love it. Right, Jee?" you say outloud to which you hear your daugther reply with a tiny "Yea!" making you and Mark smile.

The three of you walk hand in hand towards the entrace, you see other parents drop their kids off. Some kids were crying some were okay and walked inside with no problem. Minjee was looking around, the environment definitely new to her. When you got closer at the door, Mark stops walking. Crouching infront his daughter, you can see he's really trying to fight back the tears.

"Hey, me and mama will be right here when you finish later okay?" he asks the girl, "Remember what we talked about last night? You'll play with your classmates and teachers and you'll learn your ABC'S and colors"

"Color with dada?" she asks

"Uh well, dada has to go. But I'll be here when you finish"

"Dada not go with Jeejee?" she asks, a pout already forming on her tiny lips.

Uh oh.

You knew that look. That's the look that would make Mark run to the ends of the Earth just to get what his daughter wants.

"Well uh I uhm Dada can't come with Jeejee"

"Why no dada?" she asks

This time you decided to intervene before the two of them cries right here right now, "Dada and mama will be here okay? You'll go inside and do lot's of fun activities then when you're done we'll be here and Minjung too"

"Oppa?" Minjee smiles upon hearing her brother's name

"Mhm, we'll pick you up later then we'll get ice cream how does that sound?" you tell her, immediately the frown turns into a smile. Then a teacher approaches you, "Hi! Is she joining us for today?"

"Yes, this is Minjee" you say, standing up to greet the teacher

"Oh Mrs. Lee, nice to see you again! Mr. Lee" she greets the two of you, she was Minjung teacher before

"Then this must be Minjung's little sister, she looks just like him. Hello, Minjee I'm your teacher" she says crouching down to greet your daughter

"I know right, Mark's carboncopies" you laugh

"We better get inside, class will start soon. Like always, you can come around 11am to pick her up"

"Yes, we've been briefed during the orientation. Okay Minjee, you need to go inside now. Can mama have a hug?" you ask, crouching down again to hug her before she goes.

"Can't forget dada, come here princess. Dada will come later okay? then we'll cuddle after school" Mark says as he hugs her tightly like he doesn't want to let her go.

"Otay, babye dada babye mama" she tells the to of you. Waving her tiny hand before walking with her teacher. You and Mark watch until she gets inside.

You reach out and intertwine your hand with Mark's, feeling your husband squeeze your hand before walking back to where you parked.

When you get inside the car, you wait for him to say something.

"Love? You alright?"

"I think I'm gonna cry" you hear him mumble, how can this man have two kids and yet still be this adorable.

"Aw love, come here" you say opening your arms for him, Mark gladly hugging you. Holding you tightly against him.

"Our babies are growing up too fast" he says

You pat his back a few times, kissing his cheek before pulling away to look at him.

"I know, she's our second but it doesn't really get easier" you sigh

"How are you not as emotional?" Mark asks you

"Me? Oh I am emotional, you're just being too cute right now. Plus, Minjee might love going to school like Minjung" you tell him, kissing him on the lips before buckling in.

"Now, we have a few hours to ourselves Mr. Lee. What do you say we have some us time?" you smile at him, Mark blinks back at you then he's pulling out the driveway with the sound of your laughter resonating in the car.

[3:19 pm]

(cw: cursing like right off the bat)

“Shit!” You heard husband!Yuta curse.

“Are you okay?” You called out.

“I’m good!” He called back, obviously lying but he didn’t sound hurt so he must be fine. He had on multiple occasions come running from one side of the house to the other to receive a kiss on something as small as a paper cut, no running this time.

For a good five minutes you heard various cupboards slamming closed, water running, scrubbing, and cursing. He had asked you a few times where you kept the bleach, the nail polish remover, and any other harsh stain remover. You sent him confused looks, praying he wasn’t deciding to make “potions” like he told you he used to do when he was a kid. You figured he might have spilled something and was trying to clean it up before you saw, after a few more minutes you sat up and made your way to the bathroom.

You knocked on the door, “You know not to mix chemicals right?”

The door flew open to reveal a flushed and panicked Yuta, “Of course I know, I was being careful.”

He held his hands behind his back and pressed a quick peck to your cheek, on his way to his phone that was charging. 

“Have you finished painting your nails yet? You usually show me once you’ve finished them.”

He hesitated for a second, body frozen, “I messed them up and I haven’t started over yet.”

“I can do them for you!” You reached for his hands, holding them in your own to lead him back to the bathroom where you kept the nail polish. Upon reaching the bathroom, you froze. “Why is there a huge black stain on our new bath mat?”

“So, funny story- hilarious even. I might have accidentally knocked over the nail polish and stained the rug.”

You took a deep breath, calming your annoyed thoughts, “It’s just a rug, next time please be more careful.” Yeah just a rug that had been placed there that very morning. Just a rug that took you almost two months to find because a certain husband of yours was picky about the feeling of the rugs because they would “feel weird” or “didn’t have enough bounce”- whatever that meant.

Yuta let out a sigh of relief, “At least you didn’t notice my wedding band!”

“What about your wedding band Yuta? Did you lose it again? That’s the third one in two years!” 

The first lost wedding band had been understandable, he was washing dishes and it happened to go down the drain. All good, no harm no foul. But the second band, that one had happened just a few months after the first. He lost it somewhere in the house, so you both tore the house apart looking for it. You checked between cushions after he said he stuck his hand there for a second, checked his pants pockets after he said he was reaching for his phone a lot, and even checked the shower drain despite knowing his ring could have never fallen in. This loss was the most annoying knowing that the ring was surely somewhere in the house, and it took almost 5 months for Yuta’s replacement ring to come in. Even more annoying when he would jokingly tease that he was a “free man” knowing damn well he could barely get through his proposal and his vows without a sob and shuddering breath leaving him every two minutes.

“Well, I guess this is better than losing it… I got nail polish on it and it’s not coming off.”

“Call the jeweler, I’m sure this will be a fun one for them.” 

He smiled nervously, making his way over to his phone. His eyes remained locked with yours, full of nerves and apprehension while the line rang, “You still love me right?”

“I guess I married you for a reason. You should go back to the store to get another rug since you’re so picky too.”

“Another couple outing- Yes, hi this is Nakamoto Yuta, I stained my ring- no, I didn’t lose another one.” He started.

Till death do you part, I guess.

"Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and being alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You have to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes too near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself that you tasted as many as you could."

– Louise Erdrich, "The Painted Drum"

But an unquenchable love for you has never left me...

{Quotes: Alejandra Pizarnik, Approximations/Simone de Beauvoir, from Diary of a Philosophy Student: Volume 2, 1928-9; Sunday, October 7/chen chen, nature poem in ‘when i grow up i want to be a list of further possibilities’/sue zhao/ Sylvia path / Maggie Nelson, Bluets/Richard siken/Ingeborg Bachmann, In the Storm of Roses from ‘The Poem for the Reader’, tr. Mark Anderson ,paintings: pinterest}

soup!

mark lee x reader, super fluffy bc this is my literal bf and he makes me want to cry 25/8

a/n: mark brainrot has been so bad lately the delusions are getting to me

“where do you wanna go for lunch today?” you asked your boyfriend, who was currently mindlessly scrolling through his phone. 

it was mark’s day off from his tour, leaving you and him to explore chicago on your own. like the lovely significant other you are, you decided to treat mark out for lunch as a way to reward him for all the hard work that he’s been doing.

“uhm,” he thought for a second before letting out an awkward laugh. “i don’t really know what’s around here.”

you thought about taking him somewhere fancy; somewhere where you could proudly treat your boyfriend to expensive ass food (even if it did leave you and your wallet crying by the end of the night) because, to you, mark deserved nothing but the absolute best. thus, you began to search for some of the more famous spots in chicago. a curious hum from your lover quickly interrupted you and caught your attention.

“johnny was talking about this one place he used to go to all the time,” he trailed off, trying to remember the name. “it’s, like, a bakery…?”

“a bakery…” you mumbled to yourself, smiling at the idea. “that would be cute!”

“i think it was called panera…?” mark sat up, ready to call johnny to confirm if his memory was correct. “yeah, i’m pretty sure that’s what it was called.”

you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. “you want to go to panera?”

mark smiled at the sound of your laughter and turned to look at you. “yeah, i’m down! i want to see what johnny was raving about.”

“it’s not all that fancy though, just a warning,” you replied. not that there was anything wrong with panera, but you wanted to treat mark to something…better than panera.

mark shrugged, moving a stray piece of hair out of your eyes. “i don’t care about that. as long as i get to spend time with you, i can eat anything.”

flushed, you looked away and stood up, pulling mark up with you. “alright! panera it is!”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

the two of you stood aside as you browsed the menu together. you hummed nostalgically with a soft smile on your face as you took in the atmosphere.

“you know, i used to come to panera a lot when i was in high school, too,” you told your boyfriend (who was meticulously observing his different options of soup).

at this, mark turned his head to you. “really? that’s dope, i didn’t know that.” the excitement in his voice made you chuckle, finding your boyfriend extremely endearing. “okay, should i get the chicken soup, or the broccoli cheddar? what vibe are we feeling today?”

after a moment, you leaned into his shoulder. “how about the chicken soup? we can share that and i can get us a pizza to share too.”

mark nodded and placed a soft kiss on your head, silently agreeing to your proposal. he let out a sudden gasp, catching you off guard. “woah, wait, you can get your soup in a bread bowl?” he looked at you as if to get your opinion and was only met with a fond smile. he took that as a way of you saying you liked the idea as much as he did. “dude, let’s do that.”

“i’ll order, you can find us a place to sit.” you gently pushed mark, determined to pay for your guys’ meal today.

mark frowned, keeping close to your side. “what? no, no, i can order, you should go sit.”

you placed your hands on mark’s shoulders, stopping him in his place. “let me treat you today, okay? you deserve it.” after mark made no effort to move, you pleaded one more time. “please? let me do this for you.”

although reluctant, mark eventually gave into you. he placed a quick peck on your cheek before turning around to go find a table for you two. “i’m treating us to dessert after this, then.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

“oh my god.”

you couldn’t help but laugh at the way that mark marveled at the food in front of him. he happily took photos of his bread bowl (and the pizza, but he was more excited about the bread bowl), and insisted on taking cute photos of you despite your constant whining about not being photogenic enough. you also took photos of mark, though he was too focused on the soup to notice that you were. 

mark dipped his spoon into the soup and raised it towards you, urging you to take the first bite (slurp ??). “here, taste it.”

leaning over the table, you hummed happily at the taste of the warm soup. maybe it was because of the cold weather in chicago, but the soup tasted especially good (or, maybe it was because you were eating it with the person you loved the most). “wow, that’s really good!”

mark took a napkin and wiped at a small drop of soup that dripped onto your chin before bringing the spoon to his mouth as well. leaning back in his seat, mark sighed in content, very clearly enjoying the soup. “damn,” he said after a second. “that’s some good soup. i see why you and johnny would come here all the time.”

“i think i only ever got the mac n cheese so, this is pretty new for me too,” you admitted, laughing at the look of disbelief on your boyfriend’s face.

“all those choices and you chose mac n cheese?” he teased you before feeding you another spoonful of soup.

“hey, the mac n cheese is really good, okay? and i was, like, sixteen.” you pouted at him.

“yeah, sixteen and clearly missing out on some good soup.” mark laughed at you, wincing after you gently kicked him under the table. “maybe we’ll have to come back sometime so you can treat me to this famous mac n cheese.”

smiling and reaching over to gently poke at his free hand, you agreed. “i think panera dates should be our thing whenever we come to the u.s., hm?”

mark shrugged. “that would be cool. i would eat anywhere with you, you know.” he took your hand in his and played with your fingers as he stared fondly at you.

you scrunched up your nose, feigning disgust. “you’re so corny.” mark only let out a soft chuckle and squeezed your hand that was still held in his.

“thanks for lunch today. you didn’t have to do that,” he thanked you softly, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles.

“i wanted to treat you out today. you’ve been working really hard, it’s the least that i could do,” you confessed to him. “you’re doing great, you know? i don’t think i tell you that enough.”

dipping his head down, mark let out small noises of embarrassment. “don’t say things like that, you’re gonna make me blush.” he tried to fight the smile that was slowly growing on his face, but it was no use. “thank you, y/n. i love you.”

you pressed a quick kiss to his knuckles, your heart swelling at his words. “i love you too. now let’s fuck up this food!”

his choice

summary: at the end of the day, haechan chooses you despite the distance in time and proximity. but why do you feel so... guilty?

notes: idol!haechan, long distance relationship, no amount of fluff detected in this fic lol 221130 haechan i have real feelings for you

genre: angst | word count: 1.4k

- “baby?”, haechan says on the other line.

“haech… hi.”

you were laying on your bed. it has been a long, tiring week. on the other hand, haechan was sitting in front of his laptop. he was trying to fix his phone, trying to find the right angle for you to see his face clearly via facetime. once he felt everything is settled, he just stared at you. he can’t help but smile at your loving features. you are still beautiful as ever, he thought.

but you can see he was also exhausted. his eyes were kind of droopy, longing for some good night sleep. but he decided to stay up to accompany you while you twist and turn, and find the right sleeping position until you fall asleep.

“not going to bed, haech?”

“i’ll let you sleep first, baby.”

then a faint smile slowly crept on your face.

you thought it was cute. he is still the haechan you knew when he mustered up the courage to say he likes you on that one night in that one september night. you thought it was funny, even. he cannot look you in the eyes when he confessed, shy and all. it was unusual for someone who is loved by plenty to still giggle and blush like a little kid. haechan remains humble, head on the clouds but feet on the ground. and that is why despite the doubts and risks of accepting his love, you took the leap of faith, and haechan never failed to make you feel special every single day.

but with the tremendous amount of work lined up in his unpredictable schedule, you cannot help but feel… sorry.

you would be lying if you say you purposely did not answer some of his calls because he was persistent to see you when he gets the chance to do so.

january 16, 1:07am | haech wrote:

january 16, 1:07am | haech wrote:

where were you?

you weren’t picking up :(

you can almost hear haechan sulking as you read his text.

january 16, 2:15am | you wrote:

just out, haechan.

january 16, 2:16am | haech wrote:

tell me about your day? :)

there were at least six missed calls that you refused to answer before this. as you watched your phone vibrating, you just wished he would… stop. it was also two in the morning from where he is, currently touring and all, while you just came back from work and slept. timezones, the distance; you can’t help but to wonder why he still stays.

january 16, 2:20am | you wrote:

tired, baby.

january 16, 2:20am | haech wrote:

just five minutes, please?

but you just left him on read. the way he waited for you to response as he replied instantly for your texts is already bothering you. you also clearly did not know back then why you would do such a thing to haechan until weeks passed by…

it never occurred to you what exactly it was until you have seen him yawning and falling asleep as the both of you catch up on what has been going on with your lives. you clearly knew it was guilty to have him around while he was struggling to maintain his life and work. the guilt rushed in when he started texting almost apologetic messages saying “i’m sorry, i fell asleep.”, “have a great day, baby! i know you could do it!”, and the recent and out-of-the-blue text message he sent that sent you the urge to hit the block button for his own good:

january 28, 5:55am | haech wrote:

baby. i hope you never get tired of me… of this. i know it has been a rough couple of weeks of us being in different parts of the world. you don’t know how much i want to hold you, kiss you, and hug you at every chance i get. please wait for me to come home. please never be tired. i’m willing to work this out. i’ll make time for you, baby.

don't leave me, please?

and by that time, you knew haechan has been also feeling you were about to back down. it is just that the assumed reasons were different. haechan feels he was losing you because of the lack of time and distance he spends with you, and you, on the other hand, are willing to sacrifice this love that you wanted to keep for a long so he could continue living freely.

so you decided to talk to haechan tonight.

he deserved to at least receive a proper goodbye.

“what time is it there, haech?”

“it’s…” haechan looked at his watch, eyebrows scrunched and all, “two-thirty a.m.”

“aren’t you tired?”

“not when i see you, baby.”

you felt like your heart is about to burst from being squeezed so tightly. you removed your phone from your face and let the camera face in front of the ceiling. you were suppressing your whimpers. it hurts to hear those words; those words that were carefully curated for you to be heard so you would be convinced he is enduring it all when he is not. and giving up the fight is only the answer you have.

“baby…?” haechan asks for you. “still there?”

“yeah, yeah.” you wiped your tears away and faked a forced smile for him to see. you picked up your phone and made sure he could not see any hints of you hurting. “just… picked up something.”

“oh, okay.”

you can hear haechan singing baekhyun’s love again, and you just smiled through the entire mini-show, exclusively for you. he loved singing and sharing his favorite songs with you. you were never a fan of ballads until he came into your life, and suddenly everything felt at ease. but you had to ask before you.

“does it get tiring sometimes, haech?”

“what do you mean?”

“this.”

he looked straight at the camera and stopped the music playing in the background. haechan kind of stood still for seconds, bracing himself on where this conversation is going. but he responded upfront and with no hesitations.

“never.”

“why?” you asked.

“because it’s you.”

“why do you still stay?”

“because it’s you.”

“why do you keep saying it’s me?”

“because i love you.”

haechan can feel the series of questions from you being said so nonchalantly and so monotonously. he already knows your walls are building themselves up as he continuously answers. it was frustrating to see that you were no longer convinced, that the i love yous no longer work.

“stop saying that, haechan.”

“it’s haech.”

“what do i even do for you?”

“you—you make me happy, baby.”

“just go to sleep, haechan.”

“i won’t.”

“why?”

“because i know i won’t be seeing you in the morning after this.”

and you know he was right. you were already consumed by the thought of leaving and convinced he makes himself strong in front of you despite the circumstances.

but haechan is not ready to give it all up, not just yet.

“listen to me, baby. please?”

you turned off your camera, and you can see haechan slightly panicking. but he had to keep his composure still.

“every day, i choose you. my heart chooses you. i come back to you because my heart says so—that you keep me sane. you keep me feeling things; that you keep me afloat; that you keep me human.” haechan insists.

“you are that tiny light that i see whenever i come back to my apartment; and when i see it, it feels like someone’s waiting for me to come home, baby.

you are that someone, baby. you love me because i can fall crumbling and all because you are my home. and you accept my flaws.

it doesn’t matter if i’m tired and all, because you’re… you’re my rest.”

you let out sobs and your cries were no longer able to be contained. haechan waits for you on the other line to open your camera, or at least say something back. he anxiously taps his foot on the floor.

you picked up your phone and there he was, staring intently at a blank screen, biting his lower lip and teary-eyed.

“loving someone is a choice.

and every day, i choose you.”

and before you end the call, you heard him saying:

"i love you so much.

come back to me, baby, please?”

would you?

touch (mark lee)

lowercase intended

“stop touching me,” mark tells haechan, removing the said man’s arm from his shoulders. “y/n, how do you deal with your boyfriend being like this?” haechan asks. you giggle at the scene in front you. mark isn’t really fond of physical touches even with you, his girlfriend. you have been dating for 5 months now, and you were used to it. he wouldn’t even let you hold his hands for more than a minute. it made you sad at first, but he explained that he just doesn’t like being touched often, and you understood him. it doesn’t mean he loves you less.

a month after

you and mark were both sitting on his couch, watching a movie you weren’t paying attention to anymore. you were busy looking at mark, and how cuddly he looks. you know how it will end if you try to cuddle— him subtly pushing you off him after a few minutes— but you would take those few minutes in his arms any day, so you slowly position yourself, and cuddle him. he wraps his hands around you, and gives you kisses on your forehead. you smile at him, and seize the moment. after a minute, you slowly get off him knowing he would do it himself. “where are you going?” he asks. “hmm? just here beside you,” you smile at him. “come here, let’s cuddle,” he pouts. “getting used to my touches now?” you joke, “the only touch i want on me forever.”