I Cried...i Hate This...😭😭😭😭😭😭

“As soon as you begin to ask the question, Who loves me? you are completely screwed, because the next question is How Much? and then it is hundreds of hours later, and you are still hunched over your flowcharts and abacus, trying to decide if you have gotten enough. This is the loneliest job in the world: to be an accountant of the heart. It is late at night. You are by yourself, and all around you, you can hear the sounds of people moving in and out of love, pushing the turnstiles, putting their coins in the slots, paying the price which is asked, which constantly changes. No one knows why.”

— Tony Hoagland, “The Loneliest Job in the World”

you’re not “too broken” to be loved!!!! it’s never too late to give love and to receive it, to find people you connect with. some crappy humans may have made you feel like your heart is too heavy for anyone to hold, but you’re flawed and scared and worthy just like everybody else. you don’t have to run away from the love you deserve.

😀⛑❤️‍🩹

how to (successfully) apologise to your significant other.

summary: your boyfriend wants to apologise for constantly ditching you in the middle of your dates.

warning: swearing? that’s basically it lol

genre: fluff, slight angst, 90’s au, whipped jeno & a side of petty reader LOOOOL

pairings: jeno x gender neutral!reader

a/n: planned out a jaemin series after watching a friend of mine’s youtube channel hehe >:3 stay tuned for that!

The sounds of tiny rocks lightly hitting your window was the last thing you were expecting to hear on a Friday at 11:27pm. 

To avoid the rest of your family waking up from the noise, you decided to go see who wanted to bother you at this time.

When you opened your window, the sounds of tiny whispers coming from an unknown place could be heard. Was there someone hiding?

Looking out your window, you locked eyes with the boy you had been dating for almost 2 years. There was a lump of something unidentifiable, maybe a bag filled with things? It was a bit difficult to identify what it was, but you supposed that could wait for a later conversation.

“Go away.” You hissed, about to step back and shut the blinds as a means of avoiding him, but Jeno continued to stand where he was, holding a boombox with ease.

“No! Just hold on a second and hear me out, please.” You could hear the slight crack in his voice as he begged you to give him a chance to listen.

Deliberately choosing not to verbally respond, you stayed stationary in your current position - watching him from your window, giving him the hint that you were silently telling him to continue. 

You might have not been an open book, but he still read your actions very well and could often tell what you were thinking. Perks of being your boyfriend, and all of that.

Jeno coughed multiple times, before hitting the play button on his boombox.

“Caaaaaliforniaa loooove-“ Your boyfriend fumbled to skip the song to the next song. Fantasy by Mariah Carey started playing. You recognised these songs as some that you enjoyed… did he make a mixtape? Specifically for you?

“Agh, shit, give me a minute please (Y/N).”

You deadpanned, “I don’t know why I still like you.”

“I’m glad we kinda share the same sentiment, hun. But at least I know why I like you!” Finally, he played the appropriate song that he had in mind for this situation. Let’s Stay Together by Al Green started quietly playing from the speakers.

“...Have you forgiven me yet?”

“No.” “I have your favourite snacks in this bag!”

“But I want to hear a specific word come out from your mouth.”

“I’ll say what you want, cause I actually mean it. Look, I came here to apologise. I know I haven’t been the best boyfriend as of recently-“

“Yeah asshole, spending time with your friends is normal, but constantly ditching me and even ditching me in the middle of a date to hang out with your friends? You’re the best boyfriend in the world.” Sarcasm dripped from your lips, making Jeno wince.

He then let out a sigh, “There’s no excuse for my behaviour, and I will admit that I was a total jerkface or however those shitty rom-coms we watch say these things. We however, are not in a shitty rom-com movie, and I want to make it up to you. Really.”

You raised a brow at his words, “And you couldn’t have picked a better time of day? Usually if someone wants to hang out, they hang out in the daytime so that they can go get some good sleep at night.”

“Just please come down here,” he whined, “If you don’t wanna go out with me now, that’s fine. It’s a hot-as-fuck summer night. At least take the things I got you, and give me an answer? Even if it’s just ‘give me time to think’?”

Pointing a finger at him playfully, you gave him a small smile, “You owe me several dates for the next month to make up for all twelve dates you pissed me off. Uninterrupted.”

“I just spent money on the stuff I go-” The uninterested look on your face made Jeno immediately retract his words, “Deal. Jisung owes me money and I’ll pick up more shifts at the diner, no big deal.”

Lifting a hand, the two of you stood in silence. After a bit of contemplation from your end, Jeno watched your figure run out of your room and out the back of your house quietly.

Obviously you weren’t gonna jump out of your window. You weren’t gonna break your limbs to see your boyfriend, you wouldn’t want to do that right after he apologised for being a complete ass.

Closing the door, the next thing you knew, a dog plushie, a bouquet of your flowers and a bag of your favourite snacks were being gently placed into your arms. 

“I forgive you, but all this trouble for me?” Blinking, you looked up slowly at him.

Jeno simply shrugged, “You’re worth going the extra mile for.”

The sound of a familiar - scratch that, two familiar voices going ‘aww!’ in the bushes could be heard, followed by a ‘shut up! you’re ruining it!’ from a certain Huang.

“You’re forgiven, Nono.” At the mention of his familiar nickname, Jeno’s eyes lit up, making you smile fondly.

The two of you leaned closer to each other, not saying a word, but simply smiling at one another.

“My god, just kiss already, I’m tired of you two acting like Ross and Rachel or whatever!” Your mom yelled, startling everyone else outside. The rocks must’ve woken her up, you deduced.

As the two of you turned to look at one another, a pout formed on Jeno’s face while he shrugged, “Well, now that we’ve got permission from the audience…”

Lifting a hand up, you quickly ran over to your mom, giving her the items to hold before dashing back to your boyfriend and pulling him in by his collar for a long kiss.

Feeling your boyfriend’s hands slowly working their way up your ass, you smacked them away, making him pout.

Johnny @ The 2022 Met Gala

“It’s been a long, hard road but I’ve finally found the closure I need to move on. I’ve learned to accept that my all is not always going to be enough and love is neither owed nor earned it either is or it’s not. I gave you the world, but you wanted the stars.”

—

lee and lily - haechan dad scenario

hello!! just wanted to write a quick haechan fluff. haechan as a girl dad, i just know he'll be the most gentle and caring and whipped dad 🥺😭

if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2023 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

"Honey, I'm home! oh what are you doing there, angelbug?"

Haechan stops by the doorway when he spots his daughter sitting on the bottom step with her arms crossed and a frown on her cute little face

"Time out" his daughter answers with a pout, Haechan had to hold back his laugh just in case you're around watching. He tries not to get in your way whenever you discipline your 4 year-old daughter, he did it once and he ended up in trouble with you too.

You always tell him she's too spoiled, how can he not spoil her though?

Lee Nari, you and Haechan's first born. Baby girl was born on June 06, yes the same day as your husband. The two of you were enjoying his birthday dinner at home with his family when it happened, it was to say the least a very dramatic way of entering the world. Little Nari knew how to announce her entrance, a few hours later she was born.

Since then she's been yours and Haechan's world. You can control yourself when it comes to giving her what she wants and teaching her how the real world works but her father is a whole another story.

If Haechan could, he'd give Nari the world on a silver platter. When she was a newborn, she would make the slightest little baby noise and Haechan would be on his feet checking on her.

You adore it. You love how he loves his daughter. There's no doubt she'll have one man loving her truly for the rest of her life. As long as Haechan is around, Nari would be loved and cared for and protected.

Walking towards his daughter before crouching down to meet her eyes,

"Did you do something that you weren't suppose to?" he asks

"She drew on the wall with markers, then when I asked her if she did it she said Uju did" this time Haechan let out a chuckle when he heard your explanation, looking up the staircase to see you standing with a rag and bottlespray in your hands. Probably cleaning up the mess little Nari made.

"Who knew our dog was an artist" he jokes, he stands up before cupping his hand over Nari's ears "How long has it been?" referring to her being on time out

"Like 5 minutes, atleast talk to her Hyuck. She's getting cheekier and cheekier by the day, and you're not helping" you told your husband, walking down the stair

"I do help" "Yeah, help her with getting away with things" you counter

"Okay, you're not wrong. Not my fault I can't say no to our baby, she can do no wrong in my eyes" he says, you give him a pointed look. One he understood even without words.

"I'll talk to her" he tells you before looking down to Nari

"Let's go, Nari. We'll help mommy clean up, okay?" he says as he picks up his daughter in his arms.

Before the two Lee's make their way upstairs, Haechan speaks again

"Now, what do we say to mommy?" he asks Nari who is currently playing with the button on his shirt

"Sorry, mommy" Nari mumbles

"Doesn't count if you don't look in her eyes. Now try again" he tells her gently.

You don't talk, just stood beside the daddy and daughter duo. Haechan has always been the energetic, all-out type of person. But when he's with his little girl, he's the most gentle man.

The little Lee looks up and look at you with a small pout on her lips, "Sorry, mommy"

Haechan looks at you, waiting for you to succumb under her powers just like he always do. Like he had when he first held her in his arms. Like how he'll always be for the rest of his life.

"Don't do it again okay, and don't lie to mommy when I ask you. I forgive you" you tell her with a small smile. Leaning over to give her a kiss on the head

"Hey, where's my kiss?" Haechan says, earning an eye roll from you but you comply nonetheless.

After all, Nari isn't the only Lee who has you wrapped around their finger.

Giving Haechan a quick kiss on the lips before passing the rag and spray bottle to him. "Goodluck, love you" you tease him, lightly pushing him upstairs.

"You see angellove, there's this thing in your playroom. The coloring books and canvass I got you, you can paint and draw on them all day so that you and I don't have to clean. And mommy won't get mad, she's scary when she's mad"

"Lee Donghyuck!"

[11:09 PM] The apartment door swung open as Donghyuck stepped inside with his arms full of bags. You started to get up to help, but he made this noise that was between a strangled yelp and a full-on screech. He waddled his way to the kitchen before dropping all the bags on the counter, and then he ran back to close and lock the door.

“I could’ve helped,” you commented.

“You still can. C’mon, I can’t put it all away by myself,” he replied with a grin.

Groaning, you got off the couch and shuffled over. Donghyuck had a system in the kitchen (even though you’re the one that did most of the cooking) and would whine every time you put something in the wrong place. The only problem was that he would change the system every few weeks without telling you. You’d since given up trying to get him to stick with one and just deal with the surprise of your ingredients missing.

“No, that goes in the cabinet closest to the hallway now,” Donghyuck said when you moved in the opposite direction.

Biting your tongue, you followed his direction and put it in the only empty spot. The next item in the bag stopped you in your tracks. It was one of your favorite snacks, and Donghyuck couldn’t stand them. He thought they were disgusting, but you loved them. When you found the box that you already owned, it felt like it should be replaced soon.

“Did you buy these?” you asked, fully knowing the answer.

Sure enough, Donghyuck gave you a weird look. “They’re in the bag, aren’t they?” He turned back to the fridge that he was currently stocking. “I moved them the other day and felt that the box was light, so I picked up another one today.”

Your heart felt so full. You stepped forward and pushed him against the counter before kissing him deeply. He made a noise of surprise before reciprocating. When you pulled away, there was a dazed, confused look on his face.

“Not that I didn’t enjoy that thoroughly, but what was that for?” he asked.

“For buying my favorite snack,” you told him.

“Really? All I did was buy some more.”

“Yeah, but you thought to pick it up even though you don’t eat it. It means a lot when you do stuff like that,” you tried to explain.

“What, buy you food?”

You shook your head with a smile. “No, when you notice I need something, or when you look at something at the store and buy it because you remember I like it. Like, you buy it without me asking for you to grab it for me.”

Donghyuck smiled. “I’m glad I can bring you that little bit of joy. “

“Me too.”

𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐆𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐲.

Pair:  Jaemin x reader Genre:  Fluff, romance, established relationship WC:  2k Synopsis:  A rare early morning spent suspended above the city with your lover by your side.

  There’s a certain sound of the city just before the sun has risen. It’s a different type of silence; one of anticipated liveliness, one that is never truly quiet. It’s the sound of buses and taxis driving about on their routes, engines revving upon green lights and brakes squeaking upon red. The vibration of the engine that carries its way up, up, up through the space between the buildings, reverberates through the stillness of the morning. It’s white noise–muffled and forgettable most of the time. That is unless it’s dawn, only then does it ring serene.

Keep reading

morning with haechan *ੈ✩‧₊˚

🌻✨🌙🌿☁

pairing : idol haechan x f reader.

genre : tooth rutting fluff, domestic, established relationship.

summary : to be very straightforward, this was inspired by his ig live in hongkong.

word count : 1648 words.

warnings : reader has period cramps, make-out session, suggestive.

a/n : i wrote this mainly for myself 😔 i love haechan so much 😭

masterlist

buy me a coffee 🥹🫶🏼

if there is a way you could translate the perfect morning, it’d be the way haechan always wraps his arms securely around your body, holding you close to him. it would translate into the way he nuzzles his cute nose into the deepest crook of your neck and breathe in your scent calmly before he opens his eyes. it would be the way he hums softly as his hair tickles your nape and his eyes would notice the goosebumps that would prickle your skin.

but this time, your perfect morning doesn’t seem so perfect anymore when you wake up with atrocious cramps eating out at your lower belly. you can’t open your eyes as you try to control your breathing, your frail fingers catching on haechan’s to ease the pain, or barely try to as it gets stronger.

you curse inside your head and prepare yourself mentally for the hell of a week that’s ahead of you. before an accident would occur, you gently peel yourself away from haechan’s strong grip and hurry to the bathroom. with a deep sigh, you quickly put on a pad and go back to the warmth of the bed.

haechan’s eyes are still closed as he senses you back beside him and without wasting a second, he fumbles around the sheets to wrap his arms around you again, squeezing you into a hug and stretching his body at the same time. you instantly snuggle into his neck before guiding your lips to the mole sitting just below his neck and kissing it gently.

“good morning,” he softly whispers, voice gruff and still dripping with sleep. his morning voice never ceasing to give you butterflies deep inside your tummy.

you hum in response when his fingers start dancing around your lower back, gently massaging your achy muscles. you feel comfortable beside him and your body always seems to feel lighter whenever he’s cuddling into you.

“do you have practice this morning?” you ask with your eyes closed. haechan smiles down at you, a hand still massaging your back while the other slithers inside your hair. his fingers deliver the most tender touches around your ear, the gestures helping you relax even more and melt into him like a burning candle.

you secretly wish he’d have a late start of the day today, just so you can stay glued to him all morning.

“do you want me to stay longer with you?” haechan smiles, his eyes squeezing shut in the process.

your response is just you snuggling closer to his body, your legs wrapping around his.

“hm, clingy girl?” he chuckles as he ruffles your hair, waiting for a verbal answer this time.

you deeply breathe his scent that’s drifting to your nose with every movement of his body. placing another gentle kiss to his neck, you hum. “yes, i want you to stay longer. don’t want you to leave me just yet.”

“okay baby, anything for you,” his thumb dances on your face, the pad kneading around your forehead, temple and the space between your ear and cheek.

“you’re gonna cancel practice?” you pop your eyes open, lifting your face to come closer to his.

“you know i can’t do that, baby,” he pouts, kissing the bridge of your nose before kissing your lips. “but it won’t hurt if i go a bit late.”

you can’t hide your disappointment but you also can’t be greedy while dating an idol. you try to wipe the pout off your face and end up smiling up at him. a stubble has started to from on his chin, giving him a vary sexy look and his lips are beautifully puffy and so kissable, hypnotizing you into pushing your arm up from the sheets and placing your fingers on his pillow-like lips. on instinct, he pressed the tip of his tongue on the corner of his mouth before biting his lower lip and giggling at your sweet actions.

with the pad of his finger still caressing your cheek and yours running through his lower lip, you couldn’t believe that this is true. how he’s here by your side and he loves you way too much for his his own good. and you…your whole existence now has meaning with his name written all over the corners of your body and mind, with touches and kisses and words and hugs imprinted on the map of your skin that he knows oh so well.

you’re not afraid of being an open book to him because he’s so gentle and generous with you. he knows you so well and you don’t mind it one bit. and the same goes for him. he’s never afraid to be vulnerable with you and to unveil his deepest thoughts and feelings because he knows that you’d always have his back, and would love him the way he deserves.

“i’m so in love with you, i can physically feel it.” you confess, taking haechan by surprise.

“yeah?” he whispers, the corners of his lips stretching into a wide smile. with his thumb traveling down to caress your lips, his face gets closer to yours before he places the tenderest, most gently powerful kiss on your lips. your heart skips two beats at a time as he seems to take you into a place far from reality with only his lips dancing around yours.

his soft lips push into yours and mold together to create the perfect pace. your fingers grip his waist, legs pulling him closer into you as if it’s possible to merge into one. your body exudes warmth that can burn his bones down to ashes down your feet, but you would bring him to life over and over again with just one pinch of your fingers. haechan’s heart drums crazily over the curves of his ribcage as his fingers take their usual path to lodge into the swell of your hips, and going down to strongly grip on your butt.

the smallest yet most sinful whine escapes the back of your throat as you arch your back into him, your chest pressing into his, nipples hotly poking his naked chest and igniting a speedy rush of blood to pump angrily down his bundle of nerves. haechan’s breathing quickens and he latches on your lips as if it’s his last mission.

he makes you feel good with everything he does, from his passionate kisses to his sensual touches, he’s got your small heart full of him. and with one last bite on your lower lip, he gently pulls away with it still between his teeth, before it bounces back to its place, a visible thread of saliva stretching between your mouths.

“can you feel it now?” he breathes, hard on top of you. “how much i love you?”

your hazy eyes gaze at each other as if you guys were up in the clouds, your chests rise and fall through a crazy rhythm with fingers still gripping into each other because you can’t get enough.

“more.” you whisper.

“more?” haechan chuckles, pecking your lips softly. “more what, baby?” he tilts his head to the side, his childish side quickly making an appearance after he has just managed to swipe you off your feet, not quite literally since you guys were laying down on the bed.

“i can feel it more now,” you guide his hand to place it on top of your trembling heart, and he smiles proudly at that. “and i always want more of you, haechan. always, always, always.”

“i’m always yours baby, and you can take whatever you want from me, i’m all yours.” his arms wrap around you, giving you the warmest hug before softly pulling away.

“i’ll be back in a sec.” he quickly retreats from your embrace before getting back to bed with a tissue in his hand. you look at him confused before he starts wiping the droplets of sweat that have gathered on top of your cupid’s bow and all around your neck.

your heart swells at his actions and you can’t help the smile from reaching your lips as you notice the pout forming on his mouth from concentrating on wiping your sweat away from your skin.

“are you having bad cramps?” haechan asks, worrisome visible on his face. “you’re sweating so much…” he trails off, voice softening towards the end.

“yes,” you answer, only now realizing the state you’re in. “but you made me forget about them,” you smile tenderly at him.

“i love you so much,” he wraps both his hands around your face, before kissing your forehead. “my strong girl. let me go grab some painkillers for you, hm?” he kisses your forehead again.

you nod your head at him with a smile on your face. you see his silhouette disappear behind the door of the bedroom before you turn to lie on your back. the butterflies inside your tummy getting wilder by the second, with every kind touch and word coming from haechan, you seem to only drown in his love even deeper, especially when he knows what’s wrong with you without you saying anything to him.

you deeply inhale from your nose, when you see him enter the room again, a cup of water and painkillers in hand.

“here,” he helps you sit up, pulling your body up with a hand gently placed on the back of your neck. he then grabs the cup of water and guides it to your lips, smiling at you until you take a sip. “there you go.”

“thank you.”

“anything for my baby,” he smiles before turning his attention to the window behind you. “it seems like it’s gonna rain this morning, how about we put on a movie of your choice?”

“sounds like a perfect morning then.”

and with that, period cramps are long forgotten, and your perfect morning is back again.

back and better.

a/n : this was supposed to be a small haechan drabble…i got carried away SO MUCH!! but blame haechan, don’t blame me 😔 i hope you enjoyed what i wrote, please reblog if you did🫶🏼 my heart is still beating so fast!!🤭