Butchbunkum - Untitled

When you go to bed and forget to feed the cat

?????

ok given that there are no non-evil options for the pope i guess i begrudgingly appreciate in an abstract sense that they chose someone who recently tweeted "jd vance is wrong" lmao. it doesn't make anything better but it makes jd vance's life a little worse and i do think that's funny

Don’t join the rat race, raise children fat of face

All this time thinking about your Net Worth when we should be thinking about the fertile Wet Earth

Let’s not forget the ending:

He watches his beloved dog die on a pile of shit and then goes and FUCKS EVERYONE UP!

You think Odysseus was Homer's favorite blorbo because of the amount of details he put in his descriptors. I think Odysseus was Homer's favorite blorbo because of the absolute hell he put him through. You cannot convince me that The Odyssey wasn't just someone going buck wild with their favorite oc—because that's exactly what it was.

Precision.

It’s easy to ignore information I don’t need. Near impossible to manifest information I don’t have.

European recipes make me feel like Walter white

American recipes: [3 page story about how their mamaw used to make this for them during the depression] so you’re gonna smack a stick of butter in there and then put a cup or two of flour until you feel like it’s dry enough. Be generous with the sugar. You’ll know when. Get a healthy amount of molasses and an egg in there and then mix up with your hands until it’s nice and crumbly. If you’re feeling fruity you can add vanilla extract here if you’re tough like they are where I come from cornmeal will do. Add water to taste and texture. If you’ve struck big it can be milk. Put in cast iron skillet blow it a kiss and bake until golden brown. Let cool until you get tired of smacking a bunch of little hands away from having a taste.

European recipe for essentially the same thing: You. Worm. Get out your little scale. You need 147 grams of flour. no more no less. 133 milliliters of fresh milk. 27 grams of white granulated sugar. If an extra granule ends up in the mixing bowl someone from Brussels will be by to administer the proper regulatory fee in 48 hours. Whisk together for 139 seconds exactly and titrate 3ml extrait de vanille into the bowl using an eye dropper before baking at 231 Celsius for 26 minutes. If you deviate from this in any way the food will be inedible and your fine will double. 

umm fucking sniffsniffsniffsniffsniff ??? ? (x)

Wet. Diaphonized, please.

would you rather be taxidermied or be a wet specimen wait dont leave

Dynamite Cop asks the question:

what if Moses was a cyborg samurai?

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Thanks for piercing the temporal veil of my past and reminding me of that which i had forgotten!

Darrell K. Sweet's 1989 cover to Piers Anthony's Visual Guide to Xanth, by Piers Anthony & Jody Lynn Nye. Via Ranaroth on Bluesky.