Plot Armor But It’s Bruce Wayne’s Wealth.

I recently watched a rendition of Fëanor's speech to the Noldor on TikTok and I gotta say, hearing it spoken gives it so much more power than just reading it.

While reading the Silmarillion I've always thought that it was a very charismatic speech, even if Fëanor is basically asking his people to leave the only home they've known to literally fight a god. Tolkien wrote an absolute banger of a speech where just reading it already has me going "yeah, yeah that makes sense I get why the Noldor would up and leave after hearing this".

But hearing it being spoken and not only read as part of an audiobook, but actually spoken by a voice actor in an interpretation of how Fëanor would've spoken it really gave it a lot more depth that I wasn't expecting. It was very rousing, it's like your mind was silenced and all you can do is hang onto Fëanor's every word. By the time the voice actor finished the speech, I was ready to pack my bags, cross the ocean to a place I've never been to, and potentially die fighting a god. While my brain still paused at the subtle hints of manipulation (because that speech was manipulative to a degree. But I think that deserves its own post), it was mostly overridden by the 'fuck yeah let's do this' mentality.

The people who stayed back (before the Kinslaying of Alqualondë) during the Flight of the Noldor after hearing that speech are the real deal. It honestly takes strength to not get dragged in by the roaring emotions.

mutuals do you have any resources for when your image is shared online without consent?

so my friend and i were pulled into one of these "pranks" done in public and filmed without our consent or rather after i specifically said i didn't want to be filmed. now the video of both of our faces in close up is going viral on tiktok, as it's been published (again, without our consent) on this 15 year old's prank channel. it now has over 4 mil views and as someone who's extremely guarded about my privacy and has never posted my image online, ever, i find this very upsetting. the dutch/european law isn't really protecting us at the moment as it is "filmed in a public space" but i know people have resources for finding/deleting things like leaked explicit images or images stolen by companies so i'm wondering if anyone has any insight on similiar situations. i hate this. as much as i am filled with resentment and would love to teach that kid a lesson, i know i should just get him to take the video down and not draw more attention to myself online. pls advise

Such posts make me rethink everything I know about my body and, surprisingly, they help with maintaing my self-esteem on its level. Seeing such mundane things as "walking on two legs" appearing as wonderful is really wholesome.

Centaurism is when over many generations, a pair of front limbs goes from being used for support and locomotion to being permanently held off the ground for grasping, object manipulation, or other purposes. Basically turning a pair of front feet into a pair of hands.

Having four legs is often considered to be the ideal number for large animals, being very stable and resource efficient.

Therefore, it stands to reason that intelligent aliens with six limbs (4 legs, 2 hands) or more would be very common, and tool use on planets where the equivalent to Earth's vertebrates have 6 legs would be much more common among species than it is on Earth.

Aliens would be astounded by our ability to balance on merely two feet and our incredible flexibility. They would also be fascinated that some species of birds of all things figured out how to use tools.

"How did your raven use the key card?! Its front limbs are wings! Its back limbs are legs! It doesn't have hands!"

"She used her mouth."

"Ohhhhhhhhhh... Amazing."

so true. i was just changing my feelings from one to the other from time to time.

a corpse is nevertheless a corpse, Thorin. Take care of your skin.

Bilbo: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river.

Thorin: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in their own pool. Big difference.

"We call it vff," said the alien. "It's - it's hard to describe to a species without vffsense. Imagine trying to describe light to a species that never evolved eyes. But there are forms of life that are only perceptible with vffsense, and they've visited Earth and fed on life as long as it's existed here."

There was a pause.

Then the human said, "That's the worst thing you've ever said."

"Don't worry about it."

"I think I have to, now."

"No, because - well - you have a species of spider which pretends to be an ant, correct? It's not capable of understanding the fact that it's mimicking an ant, but it instinctually mimics an ant in order to deter predators."

"Sure?"

"Humans produce a vff to mimic varths, predators only perceptible through vffsense. The organisms that would like to feed on you are terrified of varths, and so they leave you alone. You aren't aware you do it, you don't have the capacity to understand you're doing it, but you evolved to instinctually do it to deter predators you can't see."

There was a pause.

Then the human said in a very soft and thoughtful voice, "And are there varths on Earth?"

"Yes," said the alien. "Everywhere. But don't worry about it."

Alien crewmate: Welcome back, Human James. You were gone suddenly for two weeks! What kept you on-planet for that long?

Human James: Oh I had my appendix taken out.

Alien crewmate: What is an 'appendix?'

Human James: It's an internal organ humans have that sometimes gets infected and needs to be removed.

Alien crewmate: You can just REMOVE an entire ORGAN from your body?! And be fine two weeks later?!

Human James: yeah we don't actually need our appendix and no one really knows what it's for. Most people think it's a useless organ leftover from our evolutionary ancestors that were herbivores. Though there's research to suggest it might have some use. About 20% of humans get appendicitis and need it removed sometime in their lifetime.

Alien crewmate: two weeks?? Two weeks?! To recover from having an entire internal organ removed?! Humans are so scary.

Human James: well it's a pretty small internal organ and I'm not 100% recovered until another month.

Alien crewmate: I am never fucking around with you ever again Mr Apex Predator that can fully recover from having an internal organ removed in less than two months. Human biology is insane.

Human James, shrugging: If you say so.

Humans are weird: Not what I expected

Human Security officer: First day on the job?

Alien Trainee: Yeah, bit nervous.

Human Security officer: Don’t be.

Human Security officer: Sure we see a bunch of strange things here on the station, but working security isn’t so bad.

*Over the radio*: Hey Sarge, it’s happening again.

Human Security officer: Gods damnit.

*Answers radio*

Human Security officer: Where are they this time?

*Over radio*: Deck three.

Human Security officer: *to Trainee* Right, I got to go handle this so you might as well come along to. ----------------------

*Several decks later*

Human Security officer: Now whatever happens, I need you to be calm.

Alien Trainee: Saying that makes me less calm.

Human Security officer: Just shut the hell up then and watch.

*turns corner and sees gathering of people. Many of them look like miners who had just returned from outer system asteroid mining*

Alien Trainee: *Looks confused as to what they are all looking at until they tilt their head up and see a monstrous being of pink flesh and tentacles clogging up one of the hallways leading to the docking bay*

*The creature is easily three to four times the size of any of the gathered humans and ooze drips from its tentacles*

Alien Trainee: *Begins to panic and rest their hand on their sidearm holster before realizing they haven’t been issued a weapon yet*

Alien Trainee: *Turns to look at human sarge only to find him casually walking towards the monster*

*Only now does the trainee realize that none of the humans appear to be panicking or freaking out*

*Crowd parts to let the human sarge stand before the creature that now turns its full attention to the security officer*

Human Security officer: Marvin?

Human Security officer: Marvin you need to go back home.

*Creature lets out a loud gurgling noise from beneath its tentacles that sends shivers down the alien trainee’s spines*

Human Security officer: Marvin! I know you don’t like it when your friends leave but they need to go back to work.

*More loud grumbling and the creature retreats further into the tunnel, fully blocking passage*

Human Security officer: MARVIN! Get out of the tunnel!

*Softer gurgling but the creature only uses their tentacles to cover their eyes*

Human Security officer: Marvin I can still see you; covering your eyes does nothing.

*No response*

Human Security officer: Marvin. Maaaaaaaaarvin. MARVIN!

*Still no response*

Human Security officer: *Sighs loudly*

Human Security officer: *Points to random worker* Where’s Mitch? Why isn’t he here dealing with this?

Human Miner: He got offered double shifts on the belt and took it for the extra money.

Human Security officer: Of course he did.

Alien Trainee: *Finally working courage up to speak* Who is this “Mitch”?

Human Security officer: *Turns remembering that the trainee was there* Ah, right; he’s Marvin’s owner and the only one he’ll listen to.

Alien Trainee: Is this, Marvin, a sentient being?

Human Security officer: More like a pet Mitch found a few years back and took with him.

Human Security officer: Don’t think he counted it on being the size of a bus.

*Sees Alien Trainee looking nervous*

Human Security officer: Don’t worry; despite his size Marvin’s a goofball with a heart of gold.

Alien Trainee: Can we not just stun it and drag it out of the way then?

*All humans nearby stop and look at Alien trainee, anger and shock on their faces*

Human Miner: Is that some sort of fucked up joke?

Human Miner 2: Yeah!

Human Miner 3: You heard Marvin has a heart of gold and you just want to stun it? What kind of monster are you?

*Loud rowdy humans increase in volume before Human Security officer waves them down*

Human Security officer: It’s his first day, go easy on him.

*Rowdiness decreases in volume but the humans still look upset*

Human Security officer: *Whispers* You can’t just go around saying you want to stun someone’s pet.

Alien Trainee: *Looks more confused*

Human Security officer: *Turns to miners* Alright, go through duct C90 and you should be able to get around him.

Human Miner: Fine, but so help us if Marvin’s still in that tunnel when we get back.

Human Security officer: What the hell are you arguing with me over that? Get Mitch to bring his ass back here so Marvin will calm down!

*Conversation devolves into argument as human miners begin pulling off a grill plate and shimmying through a duct around Marvin* (AI image provided by @myecandy )

Not a bad way to win an argument, especially with Thorin

Bilbo : How petty can you get?

Thorin : I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.