10 IX 2022

yes, this. taking photos of the blackboard and writing down only the "sketch" of the lecture usually does the trick for me: I have all the details I need but I'm able to actually listen

a thing that i didn’t understand as a student, that many of my students don’t understand, and that i still sometimes struggle to put into practice: taking the most detailed notes is not always the best way to learn the material. trying to write down every single thing a teacher (or other person who is presenting auditory information to you) says is not only slow but it also can easily stop you from being mentally present during the lesson, internalizing the main ideas and how everything fits together, which is what will actually help you learn the material.

just had a reflection about perfectionism. today I had an exam for which I was prepared very well, but my stupid brain happened and I didn't get the highest grade. my boyfriend was comforting me and he asked since when I want to ace everything, this question made me think

indeed, I don't want to ace everything. I am taking 4 courses this semester, one of which I don't care about enough to strive for the best grade, one of which is way too hard to aim that far, two of which I thought were achievable. and now I didn't achieve that. it feels different to set unrealistic goals and then never achieve them than to set very realistic ones and still fail, that's what I realized today

I am not a perfectionist. I used to be, years ago, and then I learned to set realistic goals. now I'm thinking, isn't perfectionism a kind of a coping mechanism? deep down you know your goals are impossible, so it's not really surprising when you fail. you are never satisfied, sure, but maybe it does feel more safe this way than to not know if you will be satisfied or disappointed. if that's the case then setting realistic goals is absolutely not the way to heal perfectionism

Please fund my research in finding fewer applications of mathematics. I'm going to start my project with trying to find fewer uses of trigonometry, so that ideally we can eliminate the need for remembering trigonometric identities. Then I'm going to move on to researching fewer uses for integration by parts, because that tends to get real tedious real fast. With your unending financial support, I believe I can return mathematics to the purity and simplicity it has always yearned for.

the human experience is so crazy. at any time i want, for free, i can comprehend the beauty and the horror of my own fragile existence, the cosmic insigificance and personal significance of my experiences, the impossibly vast yet laughably tiny boundaries of my own consciousness, and feel sick to my stomach with anticipation for everything i have yet to understand and grief for everything i have yet to lose.

hey guys quick question

in my country having a diagnosis is highly confidential, too. there is no such thing as "the government knowing about your diagnoses" unless you get evaluated for disability documentation (I have no idea how to translate this to english), which is your choice. besides, who knows when the diagnosis will be useful? waiting for a diagnostic appointment takes several months and is very expensive, so taking an opportunity to sort this thing out when it's possible is good. depending on where someone lives, it can be very harmful to say that having a diagnosis somehow creates disadvantages

at my university the support program for people with asd has been introduced two years ago. it took me almost a year to get everything done, a year of unnecessary suffering. treatment for depression with or wihout adhd can be completely different and having it on paper that in your personal circumstances ssri might not work can save so much time. when someone suspects adhd and the situation calls for introducing medication, it's nice to be able to try right away, not wait several months for a diagnosis. those are just some practical examples of how you never know when diagnosis might be useful

and the validation reason, yeah, that too, it's beneficial to have someone work with you through that stuff. moreover, with professional support there comes someone suggesting solutions and forms of help that one might not even thought of. there are shitty doctors, but there are good ones too, and I think we should talk more about how to find the right ones instead of demonizing getting help

By the way. Before you rush to get a professional diagnosis for a Brain Thing you should really weigh your options. Like do you just want to "prove it" or will this actually give you access to treatment you can't have otherwise? Are the treatment options available worth having the government know you're neurodivergent? Because sometimes it's better to keep things off the record because unfortunately we still live in a very deeply ableist society and you might not want to have more real material oppression stacked against you than you have to

gonna list my general goals, not necessarily what theorems i want to learn but rather some global "fix your life" things. gonna post about it every week to keep myself accountable

(1) wake up at 9 instead of 12. go to sleep at 1 instead of 4. if my current circadian rythm is here to stay, it's gonna be a fucking nightmare in november. first goal is to start going to sleep between 2 and 3

(2) concentrate on lectures. my focus is really bad when it comes to listening to someone. i have some interesting lectures downloaded and want to use them as training. first goal is to be able to actively listen to one for 30 minutes, then I can have a break for a zone-out

(3) get used to not checking my phone every damn 20 minutes. first goal is to have two 1-hour intervals daily of not checking it

probably will add some more soon

Real’s Math Ask Meme

What math classes have you taken?

What math classes did you do best in?

What math classes did you like the most?

What math classes did you do worst in?

Are there areas of math that you enjoy? What are they?

Why do you learn math?

What do you like about math?

Least favorite notation you’ve ever seen?

Do you have any favorite theorems?

Better yet, do you have any least favorite theorems?

Tell me a funny math story.

Who actually invented calculus?

Do you have any stories of Mathematical failure you’d like to share?

Do you think you’re good at math? Do you expect more from yourself?

Do other people think you’re good at math?

Do you know anyone who doesn’t think they’re good at math but you look up to anyway? Do you think they are?

Are there any great female Mathematicians (living or dead) you would give a shout-out to?

Can you share a good math problem you’ve solved recently?

How did you solve it?

Can you share any problem solving tips?

Have you ever taken a competitive exam?

Do you have any friends on Tumblr that also do math?

Will P=NP? Why or why not?

Do you feel the riemann zeta function has any non-trivial zeroes off the ½ line?

Who is your favorite Mathematician?

Who is your least favorite Mathematician?

Do you know any good math jokes?

You’re at the club and Andrew Wiles proves your girl’s last theorem. WYD?

You’re at the club and Grigori Perlman brushes his gorgeous locks of hair to the side and then proves your girl’s conjecture. WYD?

Who is/was the most attractive Mathematician, living or dead? (And why is it Grigori Perlman?)

Can you share a math pickup line?

Can you share many math pickup lines?

Can you keep delivering math pickup lines until my pants dissapear?

Have you ever dated a Mathematician?

Would you date someone who dislikes math?

Would you date someone who’s better than you at math?

Have you ever used math in a novel or entertaining way?

Have you learned any math on your own recently?

When’s the last time you computed something without a calculator?

What’s the silliest Mathematical mistake you’ve ever made?

Which is better named? The Chicken McNugget theorem? Or the Hairy Ball theorem?

Is it really the answer to life, the universe, and everything? Was it the answer on an exam ever? If not, did you put it down anyway to be a wise-ass?

Did you ever fail a math class?

Is math a challenge for you?

Are you a Formalist, Logicist, or Platonist?

Are you close with a math professor?

Just how big is a big number?

Has math changed you?

What’s your favorite number system? Integers? Reals? Rationals? Hyper-reals? Surreals? Complex? Natural numbers?

How do you feel about Norman Wildberger?

Favorite casual math book?

Do you have favorite math textbooks? If so, what are they?

Do you collect anything that is math-related?

Do you have a shrine Terence Tao in your bedroom? If not, where is it?

Where is your most favorite place to do math?

Do you have a favorite sequence? Is it in the OEIS?

What inspired you to do math?

Do you have any favorite/cool math websites you’d like to share?

Can you reccomend any online resources for math?

What’s you favorite number? (Wise-ass answers allowed)

Does 6 really *deserve* to be called a perfect number? What the h*ck did it ever do?

Are there any non-interesting numbers?

How many grains of sand are in a heap of sand?

What’s something your followers don’t know that you’d be willing to share?

Have you ever tried to figure out the prime factors of your phone number?

If yes to 65, what are they? If no, will you let me figure them out for you? 😉

Do you have any math tatoos?

Do you want any math tatoos?

Wanna test my theory that symmetry makes everything more fun?

Do you like Mathematical paradoxes?

👀

Are you a fan of algorithms? If so, which are your favorite?

Can you program? What languages do you know?

7 X 2022

my first week is over. I'm tired and I can tell already that it will be a hard semester. I have already spent more than 15 hours on my complex analysis homework and I solved 1 problem out of 10, ugh

this subject is gonna give me major impostor syndrom lmao I know that these problems are putnam level difficulty but it's frustrating to have spent the whole day on something and fail. and I'm not kidding, I have a book on problem solving techinques for putnam and the exercises there are easier than those we do in class

one could say I'm bragging but it doesn't mean anything if I can complete only 1 of 10 problems which is a trivial corollary from Vieta's and took me about 4 hours to realize anyway

algebra homework was relatively easy, I discussed it with a few people who also take the course and together we completed the whole thing

for now I still have the motivation to try to look good so this week I've been pulling off dark academia aesthetic

I am afraid of my brain because it likes to give me meltdowns right when I need my cognitive performance to be reliable. I spent the whole holiday working on coping skills so I could spend less time sitting on the floor and crying

I spend most of the time with my boyfriend studying together. having a body double really helps