Kai: "what Doesn't Kill Me Should Run, Because Now I'm Fucking Pissed."

I just finished p5r for the 7th time, here we go

Sojiro: Have you guys seen Ryuji and Futaba? They haven't finished their cocoa

Ren: No, haven’t seen them since the storm started

Sojiro: Since the sto- RYUJI NO!

Ryuji, standing in the middle of a thunderstorm with an shovel raised high: STRIKE ME DOWN ZEUS, YOU DON’T HAVE THE BALLS

Ren, completely serious: Sir, it has been reported lately that you do, in fact, have little paw-paws and a little button nose. Do you care to comment?

Morgana:

Ren: Riveting

Sojiro, walking in: Am I interrupting something?

Haru: I would die for you.

Makoto: I would die for you too.

Haru, suddenly very emotional: Please don’t

Futaba, in a high voice, holding Barbie: Hey Ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!

Ren, in a deep voice, holding Ken: Nonsense, Barbie. you’re staying home and having my kids

Sojiro: What the fuck are you guys doing?

Futaba: Playing systemic oppression

Ren: The next time Goro's angry with me, I'll drape him in a cape and say "now you're super angry"

Ren: Maybe he'll laugh, maybe I’ll die.

Ryuji: Why are you so pissed off all the time?

Akechi: *Polls out a scroll*

Akechi: Reason number one out of two thousand four hundred and—

Ryuji: Okay, okay! I get it, there’s a lot.

Akechi: *Smirks before proceeding to roll the scroll up and put it back in his bag*

Ryuji: You just carry that thing with you everywhere?

Akechi: I get asked a lot.

Akechi: Hey, do you like shrimp?

Sojiro: Not really..?

Akechi: Ramen?

Sojiro: Not much.

Akechi: Then you're not gonna like what I did.

Sojiro: What? You made shrimp ramen?

Akechi: No. I fucked your son.

Ryuji: Just before I die, I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels to make the cremation much more interesting.

Makoto: Okay, but consider this; What if you didn't.

Kidnapper, about Ryuji: We have your friend.

Akechi: Let me speak with him

Kidnapper: Go ahead you’re on speaker

Akechi: Dumbass.

Ren: Goro and Ryuji had a fight once and it went like this:

Ryuji: Anything that comes out of your mouth is fucking stupid!

Akechi: Ryuji Sakamoto.

Ren: To this day, I still laugh out loud in inappropriate settings because I randomly think about it.

Ren: Hostage or not, sometimes it's nice being held.

Some Shadow:

Shadow: Are you okay?

Sae: WHY IS THE BUILDING ON FIRE?

Yusuke: A dragon sneezed.

Ann: I tried to light a cigar with a flame thrower.

Ryuji: Dropped my latest mix tape.

Sae: Ren, please tell me what happened.

[Flashback to Ren and Futaba arguing that it was impossible to light a fire extinguisher on fire]

Ren: Um.

Ren: I don’t remember.

Maruki: On a scale from 1-10, rate your pain.

Akechi: Pi. A minimal but a never ending number.

Maruki: What in the actual-

Ryuji coming up with a frankly terrible idea: I think we should do this.

Yusuke, who somehow got stuck being the voice of reason: No, Futaba, tell him we can't.

Futaba, who was already running the logistics the moment Ryuji opened his mouth: I think your plan is dumb as bricks, but man, do I wanna see where it goes.

Ren, who just wants to see the world burn: If it fails, we'll just blame Ryuji.

Ryuji: Yusuke's in charge, though.

Futaba: Yusuke, then.

Akechi: Ren and I don't have pet names for each other.

Ryuji: What do bees make?

Akechi: ..Honey?

Ryuji:

Ruiji: Huh, really thought that would work

Akechi: Dumbass.

Ren, from another room: yeah?

Ren: What are Ryuji and Ann arguing about this time?

Morgana: They have a bet going about what Akechi is like in bed. Ann thinks she’s secretly really caring, but Ryuji thinks he’s kinky.

Ren: Yeah, he’s both.

Morgana:

Ryuji:

Ann:

Ren:

Ren: I MEAN-

Makoto: Did you seriously bring a butter knife to the Metaverse?!

Ren: You get angry so fast, it was the only weapon I could find on such short notice!

Yusuke: But you know, you have to admit it is BUTTER than nothing.

Makoto:

Ren:

Yusuke: I'm sorry.

Ren: Is it too much to ask to just have a quiet night in? Slippers, tea, a nice movie?

The shadow he's currently got in a headlock: Oh mooooood.

Makoto: For self defense reasons, I’m gonna pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely.

Yusuke: Okay

Akechi: Sure.

Makoto: If you want to live, give me all your money!

Yusuke: Bold of you to assume I have money.

Akechi: Bold of you to assume I want to live.

Makoto:

Makoto: Really?

Akechi: The path to inner peace begins with four words.

Akechi: NOT. MY. FUCKING. PROBLEM.

Ryuji: You've all heard of elf on the shelf, now get ready for-

Ryuji, placing a pot on Akechi's head: Thot in a pot

Akechi:

Akechi, getting up from his seat: Get ready for a bitch in a ditch because that's where you're gonna find your fucking body, you little-

Makoto: I need you to swear-

Haru: Fuck!

Makoto: Swear as in promise....

Sojiro: Why the hell are there bullet holes in Leblanc?!

Ren: There was a cockroach.

Sojiro: And...?

Futaba: It started flying towards Akechi.

Akechi: I hate you.

Ren: Well, according to this picture Yusuke painted of us having sex, that is untrue

Futaba, swinging from the chandelier: Makoto!!!! Look at me!!!!

Makoto, following Futaba in case she falls: I'm crying- I'm begging. Please, stop.

Futaba, after winning a fight in a palace: It’s like we just cleared a video game on easy.

Makoto: Real combat is NOT like a video game.

Ryuji, in the background: Hey, coins!

Sojiro, sighing tiredly: Futaba, I promise there are no monsters under your bed okay?

Futaba, scoffing: Not monster- MOBster. There is a mobster under my bed.

*Clicking is heard as gun safety is taken off*

Ryuji, pointing a model gun at Sojiro: Ya didn’t see shit.

Sojiro, exasperatedly: Ryuji you have your own house.

Morgana to Haru: Okay, now observe.

Morgana: EVERYONE, The floor is lava!

Ann: *Helps Makoto and Sumire onto the counter*

Futaba: *Pushes Ryuji off the sofa*

Morgana: As you can see, there are two types of people–

Akechi: *Collaspes onto the floor*

Morgana: ....Three-

Makoto: Sophia found out she could sneakily put post-its on people's backs without them knowing

Makoto: But she doesn't know they should say things like 'kick me', so they all just have smiley faces on them

Murderer: *Chasing Ren around Leblanc*

Ren: ALEXA! PLAY THE SCOOBY DOO THEME SONG!

Ryuji: Dude, why the hell is there blood everywhere!?

Yusuke: Well, you see, it's simple color theory-

Futaba: WHO ATE MY CURRY?

Ryuji: Don’t look at me

Futaba: INARI, WAS IT YOU?

Yusuke: *Looks at Sumire*

Sumire:

Yusuke: It was Sumire..

Sumire: YUSUKE YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN´T TELL-

Futaba: Oh, it was you, baby? Was it good? Want some more?

Ryuji: This motherf-

Ann: Would you kiss Yusuke for a million yen?

Ryuji: I guess..?

Ryuji: But, I mean, I don’t really have that kind of money..

Ren: Okay guys, meet your new teammate Hifumi. She gave me two dollars this morning for some reason, so I bought a jelly pouch with it.

Makoto, whispering: Why did you give him two dollars?

Hifumi, whispering back: I thought he was homeless

Morgana: You're losing blood. What's your type?

Ryuji, bleeding out: Blue hair, skinny, broke as fuck-

Morgana: Your blood type, Ryuji.

Ryuji: Oh-

Ryuji:

Ryuji: Red?

Ann: Aw, he's so cute.

Ren: Thanks, he's a rescue.

Akechi: Stop calling me that!

Ren: If I was a famous author, I would publish a book with ten different endings, each of which would print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then, when they figure it out, I would ‘come clean’, telling them that there were actually 11 different endings and watch them scramble to find the last ending.

Futaba: Are you Satan?

Ryuji: I’ll pay you $5 to do that right now.

Ryuji: Dude...

Yusuke: You had your tongue in my mouth 5 minutes ago. Don't you dare call me 'dude'.

Makoto: The game is two truths and one lie. Ren, you go first.

Ren: Okay, my hair is black, my eyes are brown, and last week my boyfriend was driving me to Chipotle and he asked if I wanted to see him drift and corner so I said yes and he drifted onto Angel street.

Makoto: Right idea Ren, but you really have to make it more challenging-

Ryuji: His eyes are black.

Makoto:

Makoto: Goro did what?!

Chihiya: May I read your tarot, sir?

Goro: A fortune teller? Very well, then.

Chihiya:

Chihiya: It just says "Yikes".

Sae: Don't be a smartass, Ren.

Ren: Dumbass it is then.

Ann: Would you rather be proposed to in private or in front of family and friends?

Ren: Private. Because when he gets off his knees, I’m getting on mine.

Akechi: *Chokes on his coffee*

Ren: I am a complex person with complex emotions, like “tired” and “food” and even the rarer third emotion, “gun”.

Makoto: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them. Suggestions?

Ryuji: Put spaghetti in it.

Makoto: I'm currently taking suggestions from literally anyone but you.

Ren: Put spaghetti in it.

Makoto: I'm currently taking suggestions from anyone but you two.

Futaba: Put spaghetti in it.

Makoto: I am no longer taking suggestions.

Ren: *Slowly reaches for a container at a grocery store labeled Forbidden Rice*

Sojiro, smacking his hand: Can’t you read?!

Sojiro: That’s not funny.

Futaba: I thought it was funny.

Sojiro: You don't count. You started laughing in the middle of a funeral because you started thinking of a meme you saw on Tumblr.

Akechi, to the theives: And if you have any suggestions, feel free to put them in the suggestion box.

Ryuji: But— that’s a trash can.

Akechi: It sure is.

Ren: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?

Futaba: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies

Haru: Socks are Feetie Heaties

Ann: Forks are Stabby Grabbies

Yusuke: Defibrillators are heartie starties

Ryuji: Stamps are lickie stickies

Sumire: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies

Akechi: I hate it here.

Yusuke, at the hospital: I'm here to see my husband.

Receptionist: And your husband is...?

Yusuke: You must be new here.

Ryuji, down the hall on crutches: Yusuke! *Trips*

Yusuke: That would be the love of my life.

Haru: Every single person you know has something in their life and past that is probably worth collapsing to the ground in an uncontrollably sobbing heap over, so be nice to each other and tell good jokes!

Futaba: Sumire is my...

Ren: come on you can do it

Futaba: Sumire is my g...g...

Ren: You're so close.

Futaba: g-

Futaba: gir-.. g-

Futaba: G-GAY FRIEND

Ren, sighing: Close enough.

Yusuke: Oh, he's handsome.

Ryuji: *Blushes and trips over his own feet when they make eye contact*

Yusuke: A gorgeous loser.

Mishima, after meeting Shinya: Seven-year-olds are the meanest people in the world. They terrify me to this day.

Mishima: If I'm on the street on like, a Friday, at 3 PM and I see a group of elementary-schoolers on the side of the street, I will immediately cross to the other side of the street.

Kidnapper: We have him.

Ren: Who?

Kidnapper, about Akechi: We have your boyfriend.

Ren: Oh.

Kidnapper: "Oh"?

Ren: Yeah, you don't have him. He has you. Good luck

Makoto: You know, not every problem can be solved with a gun.

Akechi: That's why I carry two guns.

Ren, seductively taking off his glasses: Wow... You're... really blurry.

Akechi: Thanks.

Akechi: You really don’t get to choose who you love

Akechi, gesturing at Ren: I would know because I’m stuck liking this guy

Haru: What kind of woman doesn't have an axe?

Makoto: What’s something you guys are better than Akechi at?

Futaba: Mario Kart.

Ren: Cooking.

Haru: Emotional vulnerability.

Ren, trying to create a sense of calm by lighting incense, only to find out that the sticks were actually sparklers:

Ren: This is actually painfully on-brand for me.

Futaba: I wonder what butterflies taste like.

Ren: They taste bad.

Futaba: How do you know that?

Ren: I answered your question. That's all you're getting

Ryuji, trying to ask Yusuke out: Do you eat? I do. Want to do it in the same room sometime?

Ann: Elf on the shelf? How about *Pans to Yusuke in the sink* twink in the sink

I FOUND THIS ON MY COMPUTER?!!!?!?!!

Caine: QUICK POMNI!!!! YOU MUST RETURN THE POMNIS TO THEIR ORIGINAL UNIVERSES OR THE ENTIRE MULTIVERSE WILL EXPLODE!!!!! QUICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pomni: BUT-

Caine: *shoves them all in clown car*

Me, sometimes, out of nowhere, at no specific time and for no specific reason.

FOR THE FANS OUT THERE WHO CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF SPLATOON.

UPDATE: I AM SO SYKED ABOUT THIS FAMISTU INTERVIEW!

"Learn the rules like a Pro, so you can break them like an Artist"-Pablo Picasso

If your like me and love reading, listening and seeing fanart,music and stories all based around Splatoon...well look no futher!

IF ya wanna see a bunch of amusing and comedic, like memes or mini comics collected from all just #sploonies.

Do me a favor and reblog this! or...atleast share it! More inkfolk who see thia the better!

# splatsville sploonies if yah wanna see all dah memes ive reblogged from tumblr!

HERE IS A LIST OF 83 STORIES ALL LOVINGLY WRITTEN BY FELLOW FANS LIKE YOURSELF.

I reaaaad alllooot. So these are what I get when the game ain't enough. I made this lil list from myself and others. Authors who have taken their time to let us dive into their inky tales or love, danger,action,fluff and... the risqué.

Google Docs

LIST OF SPLATOON FANFICTIONS

LIST OF SPLATOON FANFICTIONS! All these stories listed below are ones I've personally read and enjoyed. There's over 50 Splatoon Fanfictions

AND THIS IS A PLAYLIST OF....

Yah your reading right. Over 257 songs. Remixes, Fanmade, Originals and so much more!

YouTube

Remixes/Songs of the Splatverse

Over 100 Songs/Remixes all part of the Splatoon Fan Community, I've persoanlly listened to and greatly enjoy!

CHECK THIS OUT!

Ya, 6 links up but they lead too some really good fan comics. I consider small panels one and full series. Feel free teh let me know or suggest some!

Google Docs

LIST OF SPLATOON FANCOMICS/MANGA

And an INDEPTH AND UPDATED AGENT 4 SIDE ORDER THOERY BLOG!

Tumblr

Overlorder...so many little hints at the corrupted A.I twists what was going to be 4s job, or rather reaaaaally likes that idea.

Another point I will stick onto my GreyScale Agent 4 Hijacked Security System Avatar Conspiracy Board. Click or tap images tah read and

Too late for Halloween but I made a Buzzfeed Unsolved AU with post reveal-pre relationship ladynoir dynamic in case someone felt like this was missing in their life.

This is just part 1. there will be more.

Edit: Here's Part 2, Here's Part 3, Here's Part 4, Here's Part 5

Gotta love it when the gang splits up into two groups which are usually these guys

who are mature and responsible whenever they’re together, always stay on task, and generally go about things in a sensible way. And yet somehow they never get anything done.

While on the other side of town it cuts to these idiots

Doing some random-ass shit, being incredibly stupid and inefficient and yet somehow doing everything they were supposed to do and more just by pure luck.

Made a parallel canon plush

She’s probably gonna be my last splatoon plush for a while

The LEGO Star Wars Holiday Special (2020)

boo ! super long p5t comic

i drew this b4 i knew the dlc was taking palace during sae’s palace,,, so i drew it with an au where joker enters a little palace area that makes it so whoever the palace ruler touches or something they’re mentally in the happiest moment of their life. akechi happiest moment is when hes running around w the phantom thieves ^_^ and sumire is when she is in kasumi’s place living out the life sumire wanted for her ! also akechi is not fake :3c joker just thinks he is

After much consideration, I think I’m going to call this AU: “Future Bootyyy Shaker.”  Don’t forget the 3 Y’s!

I see April and Leo being very busy with protecting their underground colony, but they make what time they can for these little family gatherings, if only to help Casey (and also Mikey) feel like they have some sense of structure in their lives.  Even as the rest of world is falling all around them. 

This one was pretty light hearted, but be forewarned, it only goes downhill from here. 

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