Hey, Don't Cry, 236 Species Of Woodpecker, Ok?

white boy shocks waiter by ordering in terrible chinese and then killing himself at the table

i dont smoke but man it would make my desire to sit on the edge of gutters and stare directly forward at nothing at 10 pm more socially acceptable if i did

every day i die and then i am resurrected but i never come back quite right, this is why i am so fun and charming.

rip jane prentiss you would have loved “love me more” by mitski

getting a worst enemy who's just some guy sucks bc i want to fist fight this bastard but instead he's just responding to me on google reviews, like a coward

happy werewolf transgenderism wednesday

hey what about the cool things you know /genq

thank you so much for asking!!! i couldn’t decide what one to say so here’s three cool things i know

1. silphium is the name of an ancestor of the modern vegetable, fennel. it was used as a birth-control in ancient rome, but was driven to extinction, mostly due to being grazed upon by livestock. you also may hear some claims that it was a perfect magical side-effect free wonder-plant, but that’s just speculation and should not be taken as accurate. it’s still really cool to me though, it was so important to the time that it appeared on coins like this one ⬇️

2. the slow loris is the only venomous primate. its venom is a combination of the the more mild venom in its saliva and the more intense venom that it secretes from its forearms, it licks its forearms to create more intense than either of them. if a slow loris was to bite your hand it would hurt like hell and make your arm go numb, in some cases it has been known to kill, though mostly bc of anaphylactic shock. they also have no tail which makes them look really silly to me, little fella below ⬇️

3. moons of jupiter are named after jupiter/zeus’s children (and/)or lovers. there are 57 named moons (excluding names like “jupiter LIV" bc come on that doesnt count) and 97 confirmed moons in total. you can tell which moons are retrograde bc they end in “e”. prograde moons will end in “a” or “o”. the 4 largest of the moons are called the galilean moons bc galileo observed them, they are the most well known ones. those four are io, callisto, ganymede, and europa. i like europa bc it has a frozen over ocean and was the first one i ever learned about so here’s a picture of that below, mostly to fulfil my desire for consistency ⬇️

also keep in mind this was all of the top of my head, i double checked some things but mostly i was just remembering so take it all with a grain of salt, if something seems incorrect it might be. anyway that’s some cool things :) thanks for asking!!

i dreamed in broken esperanto and it was deeply confusing

whi am i always taking melatonin and them trying ti fight it, bro you WANTED to bev sleepky

the turbidity is low and the ph is neutral, things are looking up the the world

honestly i might be feeling depressed but i cant focus on that if im busy testing the water quality of local rivers

they should invent a magical girl wand that makes you chill tf out