I Do Not Wish To Have My Family Be Taken, I Already Have That Threat On Me By Duolingo

Please do! I need more Captain Marvel fics and I've already exhausted all of Ao3 and most of Tumblr so I need more fics to satiate my little book goblin mind that decided to focus on Captain Marvel for a while(it's been 3 months, send help-) and if I don't feed it in time, my productivity levels will go down to hell

Heroes at the watchtower: Why are they staring at each other? I hope they get along..

14-year-old Danny in his adult ghost king form:

14-year-old Billy in his adult Shazam form:

Training the Bat Way (aka Bruce’s Terrible Parenting 101)

Bruce Wayne, aka the Dark Knight, aka the absolute worst, has this little training exercise that the entire family unanimously despises. He calls it “building resilience” or “preparing for the unexpected.” The rest of the family calls it Bruce’s stupid sleep-deprivation kidnapping game.

Here’s how it works: Bruce waits until you’re at your absolute lowest—after a grueling week of non-stop patrols, minimal sleep, and a near-catastrophic Gotham meltdown. Once you’ve finally collapsed into a dead sleep (and sometimes, after he’s sneakily slipped you a sedative to make sure you stay asleep), he picks you up, sticks you on a plane, and drops you off in the middle of nowhere. Sometimes it’s a remote village in the mountains; sometimes it’s the bustling heart of a city on the other side of the planet. The challenge? Find your way home.

Occasionally, Bruce will leave you with some supplies: a wallet, maybe a burner phone, a little equipment if he’s feeling generous. But more often than not, you’ll wake up with absolutely nothing. No money, no ID, no tools—just the clothes on your back and a pounding headache from whatever the hell Bruce drugged you with.

Some highlights of Bruce’s 'training' include:

• Dick waking up in the middle of Germany with nothing but his expired driver’s license and missing socks (He'd hidden cash in them, so he can only guess Bruce found it).

• Steph regaining consciousness in Iceland with a crumpled €5 euro and zero idea how to exchange it for local currency.

• Damian waking up in the middle of the Sahara Desert. No gear. No money. Nothing but sand and the distant memory of Bruce’s smug face.

• Tim once took over a month to get home from a tiny town in Thailand. By the time he made it back to Gotham, he’d created an entire fake identity, complete with forged documents, an elaborate backstory, and several new international contacts. Bruce called it “impressive.” Tim called it traumatizing.

• Cass, of course, took this completely in stride. Woke up in India, dismantled a shady criminal organization she stumbled across, and then casually returned to Gotham two days later like nothing had happened. When asked how she managed it, she just shrugged.

• Duke waking up in the Grand Canyon with his phone at 1% and a granola bar in his pocket. He got home in less than a day, having hitched a ride, bartered his way onto a train, and charmed a group of tourists into helping him. He also got himself a pet chameleon on the way, somehow.

• Jason refuses to talk about his turn, but based on the suspicious amount of diplomatic immunity he now has in several Eastern European countries, it’s safe to say he didn’t play by Bruce’s rules.

If they’re lucky, Bruce leaves them somewhere within the U.S., in which case the Wayne name might help speed up the process. But outside of the States? Forget it. Flashing a “Wayne” credit card can cause more problems than it solves (That's if they're even lucky enough to have a credit card to flash in the first place).

To the rest of the family, this whole thing is less of a “training exercise” and more of a weird, sadistic game Bruce plays when he thinks they’re getting too soft. And no matter how many times they complain, Bruce insists it’s “for their own good.” Because of course he does.

The thing is, they all do get home. Eventually. And yeah, maybe they come back stronger or sharper or whatever excuse Bruce uses to justify it. But at what cost? (Mostly their sanity and a burning hatred of international airline fees.)

Still, the Bats have learned to adapt. They’ve formed their own set of unspoken rules:

1. Always keep some emergency cash hidden somewhere on your person (And hope Bruce doesn't find it, because he will take it).

2. Never, ever fully trust that glass of water Bruce hands you after patrol.

3. And if you wake up in the middle of nowhere, the first step is simple: curse Bruce Wayne’s name as loudly and creatively as possible. Then get to work.

Because at the end of the day, they will get home. And they’ll probably sucker-punch Bruce the second they do.

Radioactive Hero (but not really) au

Danny moves to Gotham, hear him out! There's really good jobs there that pay through the nose and the cost of living is cheap!

Plus, the city is riddled with heroes and vilains! It's so easy to slip under the radar!

Unfortunately, there are so many civilian casualties. Like, all the time. Even in Metropolis!

So Danny, for his first year in Gotham, opens small portals to the Far Frozen and gets schooled on being a field medic. None of his powers can really be used for healing, but they can make people feel better. He just has to be careful to be as far removed from the Phantom moniker as possible, so he can't use any obvious powers.

He gets a bit of a reputation in Gotham; a small time hero of the people, for the people. A hero not invested in fighting, but in dragging civilians away from the danger. He doesn't even have a moniker; people are too busy arguing over the best one for him.

So while aliens are attacking both Metropolis and Gotham, Danny is out in full kit; a gas mask to hide his face, all black, repurposed kevlar from the vests the GCPD did not properly dispose of, no identifying markers.

But one of the clean up crews notices something insanely worrying; the geiger counter they have to point at alien spaceship parts? Yeah. Yeah, it's going off when they point it at the new small-time hero.

That hero's power is radioactivity. Holy shit. It's not at a level that will hurt people, but when he's dodging through fighting the level goes up.

The clean up crew concludes and shares via Twitter that the medic-hero is only a danger to others if he gets too stressed.

Word spreads fast, and pretty soon the absolute second Danny shows up on a scene, all fighting stops.

After all, no one wants to piss off the living Nuclear Bomb.

Basically, Danny's ghost-everything sets off Geiger counters, and now absolutely everyone is convinced that the medic-themed hero only refuses to fight because his meta power is just...being radioactive.

But he isn't.

So now, because it's the perfect cover and completely disassociated from Phantom, he has to play along and pretend like yes; that is his power.

Wait what's a buildings fire evacuation plan if you aren't supposed to use the elevator to get down

I imagine Dionysus to have Grunkle Stan's voice lol

Paulina was walking home from her little self-care date~ when she noticed a familiar figure, she slowed, double checked to make sure it wasn't some random civilian, grinned and-

threw her knife!

Wes caught it, because of course he did cautious bastard. And yes she realises this now that fighting on the street was not the smartest move but it was a long time since she saw her friends from Amity and they got along fairly well with Weston.

So they had a good time, she managed to nip him on the cheek with her knife (after taking it back) he left her with a new bruise (it will be gone by tomorrow noon) and then they were both taken in by the police...

And now she has to explain why she did what she did to the GCPD and Ancients help probably Batman as soon as she gets back to her apartment. Who could've guessed that having a friendly brawl would be so taboo in Gotham? (who is she kidding of course it's suspicious it looked like they were trying to kill each other to any normal person!)

and she's not sure how much she should say!

Tim, 18 and bored out of his mind in his big CEO office, is interrupted by a scrawny teenager.

"Hey, I heard Wayne Enterprises gives out like, grants and stuff," the teen starts, clearly awkward and blushing green. "I need money to hire lawyers to put away my creepy GodFather for misuse of a mind-controlling Meta Ability and also stalking."

Tim shelves that.

Takes a look at the teen, probably Damian's age or thereabouts, that just floated through his wall of windows at over 30 stories.

White hair, floating, green eyes (lazarus green what the fuck), jumpsuit (he's never seen that logo and is already memorizing it), fidgeting.

Tim takes what the teen just said off the shelf.

"And your godfather is...?"

"Can't say without giving away who I am."

"Okay. How is he 'creepy'?"

"Keeps trying to brainwash me into being his son, or tries to clone me, keeps sending goons after me, keeps trying to win over my mom, won't stop cosplaying as dracula, and I don't really know off the top of my head. I made a list, but it's like...somewhere."

Tim took a deep breath.

Held it.

Let it go.

That reminded him way too much of Ra's.

Held out his black Amex.

"Go crazy."

I just realized something...

I asked my mom to braid my hair and she said yes. As she was braiding my hair, she got annoyed at a certain braid whis didn't wasn't to stay still. My mom has this tone when she gets like that and I realized a few minutes later that I expected to get hit because she used that tone and was behind me... It's been around 2.5 years since she last blew up on me (can't say the same for my sister but even that never got physical, just yelling)... I feel weird realizing that my mom could've hit me and I'd expect it. Especially because, at least in my perspective, she's a great mom. Just has a short temper. And she even got that under control!! Even after knowing that my grandparents used to chase her around with a wooden stick, I'm not sure if this is generational trauma (who am I kidding, it probably is) or something else...

Danny finds out that, due to his flexibility and weightlessness of being a half-ghost, he's actually pretty good at Ballet.

First it was a few classes because of a lost dare, but then those few turned into a usual thing for him.

In fact, he got so into it that even his rogues, when they realized it was almost time for his Ballet lessons, would pause the fight and make sure he went. The young half-ghost was, in their opinion, far too tense and stressed, and if they wanted to make sure he was in top form for fighting then he needed a hobby.

Regular Ballet lessons turned into competitions.

Competitions turned into him being scouted.

And while he never, ever expected this path for himself, at the age of twenty-four he became one of the best Danseurs in the country.

He's also a registered meta, but only because when he dances he gets so into it that some of his ghostly features leak over to his appearance.

Floating white hair, eyes shifting from blue to green in the lights, slightly pointed ears; costume designers adore him.

So it's no surprise that he has his fair share of stalkers.

This is where John Constantine comes in, because someone just tried to send a very nasty curse to Danny, and they need to find out who.

Song that inspired this idea here