You’d Think A Muppet Sherlock Holmes Would Cast Kermit As Holmes And Miss Piggy As Watson Based On

Maniac

Yans (Nerd, Bully, Student Council) + Dismissive Creep Reader Blurb [G.N All]

Warning: Bullying, mentions of dead animals, violence, death

(An: Never been huge of the school setting but this came up while listening to a song with the same title. If you can guess it you get a cookie)

Creep Reader who's friends with the school punching bag. Saying they're acquaintanced is a bit of a stretch as nerd hangs out with them because nobody bothers them when they sit next to this freak and they dress their wounds, and Creep only tolerates them because they take pictures of every blossoming bruise and cut.

You never offer input in their one-sided conversations, scribbling away in that notebook of yours as they go insane rambling on about what their bullies did that day and how it feels everyone appears to be out to get them. All you ever do with anyone is watch, listen, and write. It's honestly like talking to a brick wall sometimes.... which is why they had no problem accepting the only good advice ever given to them.

"Y'know.... Even if I report this to the principal it wouldn't stop. They'll get suspended for a few days and when they come back - they'll probably just kill you. If you want this to stop, you need to find a new target for them."

A new target...There's only one person more of a freak than them.

"Y/n takes pictures of dead animals."

The rumor spread like wildfire. A tale spun by a sock puppet account and sprinkled throughout the halls. Really, even they weren't sure if the rumor was true or not, but with that camera and your track record it wasn't out of possibility. All eyes were immediately on you. Your phone number was leaked and the threats and queries poured in. People would point at carcasses on the road and make sure you were in earshot when they joked about hoping nobody was taking pictures. They went so far as to sneak a dead bird in your bag when you weren't looking and poured milk on your items when they couldn't find any. They stole your gym clothes, wrote foul things on your desk and locket - but none of them had ever touched you.

As expected, you had no reaction to this. That's the thing your "friend" had always been jealous of you for. So closed off from the world, from the pain it gives. With nobody slamming their head in the lockers anymore, people began to appreciate their talents and hobbies. They made friends. Real ones. They naturally started to drift away from you, but they always stopped when they saw you in the halls.

"Hey, Y/n.... How have you been?"

"Fine."

"None of this is bothering you?..."

"As long as they don't touch me - I'm fine."

All that's where you left the conversation - and your friendship. Your dismissal to it all lead many to give up after a few weeks, but one remained. The same blight on your friend's life since the start of school. Sure, your reactions were lackluster - but they knew they could break you. It was only a matter of time - and you had just given them the key.

"Hey - Freak!"

Your head bounces off the metal door as you're thrown into your locker.

"Can't touch you, huh? The fuck are you going to do about it?"

You rise to your feet, touching the wet spot at the back of your skull. "If we're going to do this, it's better we do it where nobody can see us."

"Ha? - don't want people to see you lose a few teeth? Fine, I got a big game in a few weeks and rather not get expelled before then."

"Sure."

Your former watches as you're lead behind the school. They should do something, call a teacher - but they're too afraid. The weight of the situation falls on them as you disappear from sight. You're going to get hurt and it's all their fault. Your bully cooks up all the things they plan on doing to you, cracking their knuckles and damn near salivating at the thought of seeing your stone face crumple. They're too preoccupied with their threats to notice you pulling something out of your pocket. Their foot falls off the concrete path and into the grassy terrain as they ready their fists, doubling over in pain as pain splits up their side. They vomit spittle and their own words as they look up, metal bars wrapped around your hands.

"what....the fuck."

"Get up."

Gritting their teeth, the bully drags themselves to their feet - back on their knees before they can stand as your fist barrels into their stomach. You grab both sides of their head and ram your knee into the facture scar on their nose. You're unrelenting even as they fall back on their ass, removing your metal knuckles and mounting them as you ball your fists. You weren't ready for a murder charge just let. Over and over, your balled hand cracks against their face and jaw - drawing red with each wet smack. You stop only to switch you your unbruised hand - their arms shooting up in defense.

"please...."

"..."

"stop...."

"Isn't that what people ask you?"

You climb off their battered body, lifting one leg under your arm. "I've studied people for a while. Writing scenarios where I could ruin lives is much better for all of us than actually doing it. I know things about you too... Your family paid off your younger brother's teacher so he got get into that nice college - and you have a full ride... If you can still use both legs."

Tears prick their eyes. They fight to keep them in. This was their future you were playing with. "I'm sorry! I won't hurt anyone again I promise!"

Your grip tightens "I don't care about everyone."

"I won't mess with you anymore!"

They flinch as you drop their leg. "Good." Waking over to your discarded backpack, you retrieve your med kit and camera - dropping down beside them as you remove the lense.

"Smile."

Their eyes burn as the camera flash goes off. You set the camera aside as you open the kit and pull out an alcohol swab - pinning them to the ground as you apply it to their split cheek.

"Ow! The fuck are you doing now?"

"Quiet."

"Get the fuck off me!"

"You have a game in a few weeks, don't you? I don't think I broke anything, but you probably don't want the other team to see you with bruises."

-

The following Monday, your bully greets you all smiles and pleasant as if you were the best of friends. They could do the exact same thing as you and study you like an animal in a zoo to inact their revenge. Anyone who still picked on you quickly turned on their heels when they saw you with their click. They bragged while you were away about how they planned to tear your life to shreds so hard the damage would last long after school. It was going to be the peak of their year -

"Drink this."

"An energy drink? If you wanted to posion me, you could've done it with something better."

"The seal is still intact. No amount of chapstick will fix your dry lips, because you're dehydrated. An athlete should know better than that."

Their fingers instinctly fly to their lips. How did you?.... You did say you had been watching. They didn't know nor understand the full reach of your knowledge until they got a happy birthday message from an unknown number and a speaker ended up in a pool when they were urged to jump in. They had a fear of water since adolescence after nearly drowning at a lake. You never took charge for this acts and mostly blended into the crowd when they happened. You picked up your old hobby of patching their injuries and taking photos as payment. Why were you doing so much for someone who wanted to make you suffer?

"We're friends.... aren't we?"

Huh?

"Besides, if I stick with you, I don't have to look up gore sites anymore - or take pictures of dead animals."

You're such a fucking freak. A freak - that was starting to grow on them.

You became the person they'd look for first during school - when they needed a shoulder to cry on. You rarely offered comfort, but a pat on the shoulders was good enough for them. Their hand would find your shoulder or waist so frequently that rumors began spreading that you were dating - until people found out every touch was met with a light punch to their bruised ribs. They'd just laugh it off and apologize before doing it again an hour later.

Your former friend was having the time of their life - for a while. Something felt... artificial about their new friends. They had a good time at school and when they got together on weekends, but nobody was there for them at any other time. No one to vent to or wish them happy birthday exactly when it turned midnight - like you used you. They missed you. More than anything.

"Hey - give me Y/n's number."

Been a while since they've been in this scenario. Why was your shared bully asking them for your number?

"H-huh? Why?...."

"I had to get a new phone and can't remember the last digits. Stop asking questions and give it to me."

"Okay!"

The bully snatches their phone and punches the number into theirs - eyes softening as the line connects. "Y/n..... What? Of course it's me. I got a new phone. Anyway, I got tickets to that one movie that's coming out this week - the one that got pushed back because the prop knife turned out to be real? You coming or not?... Good."

Your former friend catches their phone as it's tossed back to them - watching their bully walk away with the flush of a middle schooler confessing to their crush. They hadn't been hit at all during the altercation, but their chest hurt hearing your voice after so long away from you - even faintly.

They find you the next day at the top of the roof. It was your favorite hiding place, and the only one your bully hadn't found yet. They sit quietly beside you.

"How have you been?..."

"Fine..."

They purse their lips together. "What...did you do to make them stop?"

"Put them in their place."

"What do you mean by that?"

You point your camera at the passing crowd. "At our age, people only have as much power as you give them. If you stand your ground they'll typically back down, and if they don't - you beat the to a pulp and ruin their families lives."

Your friend can't stop the tears from flowing. You had always been the strong one, that they knew - but how could you handle things so easily? How could they betray you like that? Their only companion in this world - thrown to the wolves when you should've been their for each other.

"It was you wasn't it?"

You stand up.

"Stay away from me."

They reach out to grab you - mend the tattered strings of your friendship. "Don't leave me. I did it, okay? I did it, and I'm so so sorry. Y/n, please forgive me - I couldn't take it anymore. I'd go back to the way things were if it meant you were still with me. Please, Y/n, I'm in lo-"

Their vision blanks, speckles of blood littering the ground floor from their split lip. You lower your hand back down to your camera.

"Don't lie to me. Or yourself like that."

It hurts... Everything hurts.... Still, they smile - showing you the bloodied whites of their teeth.

""ahhh.... Y/n, I'm... I'm bleeding. Don't you want to take a picture of me? Aren't I still beautiful to you? Aren't I good enough?"

You don't grace them with a reply, walking off as they curl into themself. It hurts - their mouth is numb, but it hurts all over. Please, come back. Let them their their head on your shoulder until the pain goes away. Y/n... Please.

"I'm sorry...."

"But are you really though?"

They cover their ears with their hands. Shut up. Go away. If they'd done their job probably - none of these would've happened. The student council president. The worthless coward didn't even have the courage to come themself. Just another lackey doing their bidding.

"Leave me alone."

"Ugh, you're so whiny. This is what you wanted, isn't it?"

"I just wanted I break - I didn't mean to hurt them."

"Yea, yeah that's what your like always says. Misery sure does love company, though. I genuinely don't see what the prez likes about that fucking creep. They're wasting their time and blood for them."

Shut up. "Don't talking about Y/n like that?"

"But you had no problem with it when it was for benefit. What did you call them? A psychopath?"

"I didn't have anywhere else to go....."

"Keep telling yourself that. I can't decide who'd I'd take more - the backstabber, or the maniac."

"SHUT UP!"

-

Walking down the steps to the first floor, you crash into someone skipping their way in the same direction.

"Ah - Y/n!" The student council president grins, picking up your fallen camera. "Good morning, good morning! And how are you doing ok this lovely day?"

"Fine."

"Faaaantastic." They point at their cheek sweeping blood on the shell of your camera. "As you can see here, I had a little bitty accident in my culinary class. I'm such a clutz, aren't I? If you give me one of those cute bandages, I'll take a picture of this cut and smile real pretty for ya!"

"Whatever." The president hums as you fish around in your bag, smiling big for their future spouse - deleting as many pictures as they can of others in that short time. If only they hadn't been out sick when the rumors spread. Then maybe you wouldn't be on that awful bully's arm and in theirs instead. They refused to let this little setback running your future together. After all, they were willing to bleed for you on their own Accord unlike everyone else in your album.

Unfortunately, they were upstaged once again - but their own council member too. They frown as the screams begin. They spit on the floor as blood splatters across the windows.

Couldn't go kill yourself somewhere else?

-

At the rooftop, panic takes flight. No no no... They didn't mean to do it. Their hands flew out before their brain could tell them no. The blood pools like a broken jug. A crowd surrounds the body. Nobody can see them from their place on the roof floor, but they can see everyone. A figure wearing a jacket that was once theirs, dyed with their blood and tears. The camera that hangs around that person's neck. The shutter of the lense. They laugh - finally understanding what they had to do to get you back.

You really did like taking pictures of dead animals afterall....

“Israel is committing genocide.” Yes. They are. But so is the US. The US is 100% complicit in this, and Israel would not have been able to do as much without the help of the US. I’m disgusted to be living in a country that is complicit in the literal MURDER of civilians. Men, women, children, elderly, families. All dead because of Israel AND the US. This needs to STOP.

Anger Issues

Brothers with an MC who has anger issues, cusses like a sailor and is also very strong, but is very supportive and caring.

Gender Neutral Reader

Lucifer

He can get quite annoyed with you at times since your outbursts tend to lead you to breaking anything within a five kilometer radius, and that includes his brothers.

He’ll have to lock you up in your room to prevent anything else from breaking. 

Sometimes when you get REALLY angry at him, you’ll end up swearing at him so fucking hard that Satan would literally be cheering you on.

“Lucifer you motherfucking son of a bitch where the FUCK is my Limited-Edition Vinyl Box Set?!” “MC, what did you just call me?”

This man will not accept being called a ‘motherfucking son of a bitch’, remember he’s the avatar of pride. He will not take your insult well. It also turns out that he accidentally broke it.

Though you insulted him that badly over your broken Vinyl box set, you still care for him as usual. Scolding him for having a shitty work and sleep schedule. Insisting that he could get more work done rested well. (though you’d prefer if he worked less and spent more time with you)

Mammon

Is fucking scared of you, but also fucking in love with you. He’d even sacrifice the things he’s bought that were so fucking expensive, for you to use it as a stress reliever. 

Story time, when Mammon tried to escape Levi and use you as a sacrifice. You’d literally grab his jackets collar, and said to him. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going? Are you that scared of some scrawny-ass bitch?”

Sadly, he managed to get away. 

There are cute moments between you two at times. Like how you are literally helping him get over his immense fear of Lucifer and telling him to ‘man up’ and you also encourage him to stand up to the people who bully him, like a real man.

“Listen here Mammon, you gotta stop letting your lil’ brothers bullying you. You are literally the second strongest, act like it! You’ve gotta stop acting like a pussy!”

All I can say is you’re making progress, just very slowly.

Leviathan 

Remember how I said that you called Levi a ‘scrawny-ass bitch’? He was very offended by that, but couldn’t help but accept it as the truth since he is what you’d call a ‘Slim-Jim’

He’ll yell at you, saying that was offensive. And he couldn’t help it since he was a disgusting shut-in Otaku.

“Who the fuck told you you could degrade yourself huh? I see nothing wrong with how you are you fucking dumbass!”

He’ll be crying tears of gratitude, but he’ll quickly wipe them away and get down to business to defeat, the Huns.

He’ll invite you to play video games with him (specifically games like Super Smash Demons) just to see your angered reaction when he wins. He’ll find it amusing and scary at the same time. It was funny to watch the loser rage when you won. And it was scary because unlike the times when he watched the losers rage, the loser, was RIGHT beside him, and could literally put him in the hospital. 

Whenever he calls himself a gross disgusting otaku, etc. you will literally smack him and swear at him very heavily, yelling at him to stop calling himself that. 

Satan

You think the avatar of wrath, ANGER INCARNATE, would get along with you, A LITERAL TICKING TIME BOMB THAT’S ABOUT TO EXPLODE. Well you are sorely mistaken. 

You guys would literally be the best the best of buddies. No doubt about that. You both would go to libraries (and proceed to get kicked out because of how loud you are), go to art museums to admire art. (and proceed to get kicked out because you’re being too loud and disturbing the other people who are trying to admire the art).

He’ll vent to you about his daddy issues problems with Lucifer. And you’ll gladly help him vent out all his pent up anger. “Listen here Satan. The best way to vent your anger is through violence, so if you don’t want to beat somebody to a bloody pulp, now’s your chance to do so.” when you told him that he was like: dude wtf is wrong with you. Then you told him that he could just use a punching bag. 

So yay! He can let out all his anger AND get ripped! Nice. He can use his (soon to arrive) muscles to crack Lucifer’s head open, yipee!!!

Though sometimes you get angry at Satan and vice versa. You two’ll get into fights and the room you two were fighting will be absolutely DEMOLISHED. Satan would be in demon form- no joke, he will be in his fucking demon form. 

You will both be incredibly bloody and beat up, that the brothers wont be able to recognize you. Apart from those ‘small’ fights, you both are very good friends and always look out for each other.

Asmodeus 

He’ll be telling you that being that angry will make you look like an old person, ew! 

Honestly in my opinion, he’ll be the person you’ll complain about your (small) problems to the most. He’ll be painting your nails and you’ll be like: “Dude, Beel ate the fucking food I ordered from Akudonalds! I was fucking starving and Beel just had to come along and eat it.”  “I get what you mean darling, one time Beel ate the limited edition perfume I had bought and was going to use on my date with this hot succubus.” 

Whenever he’ll take a pic with you, you’ll always look angry or be mid-shout in said pic. 

The replies on that photo would fall into one of three categories: a. They’re mainly focusing on Asmo, b. They would be laughing at your face or c. They’d be asking on who the fuck you were.

Asmo would reply to one of the comments in category c telling them: “He’s my significant other ofc~~”

You could always sense whenever he was feeling insecure, so being the good friend you are, you pull up a chair, and have a talk with Asmo.

Beelzebub

Your strong? Well now you’re Beelzebub’s gym buddy yayyyyyy.

Ninety percent of gym equipment is broken since you get a bit too angry, and Lucifer is going to give you one heck of a scolding. 

Beel will eat your food (he’s the avatar of gluttony, what’d you expect), then you’d literally be throwing hands with this giant.

“BEELZEBUUUUUUUUUUUB, HOW DARE YOU EAT THE FOOD I’VE BEEN WAITING TO ARRIVE FOR A LITERAL FUCKING HOUR.”

He’ll feel sorry and try to make it up to you, he’ll give you food, more food, even more food. Till there’s a mountain of his stash of food (plus the food from the fridge) right outside your door, he would literally wait outside your door, starving, as he’s waiting for you to go outside.

When you do go outside, you’ll spot Beel, hugging his knees, most likely asleep. You’ll sigh and grab some of the food on the pile and made your way towards the man. You grabbed him by his hair, lifting his head up. Beel would yawn and blink twice, then he’ll see your face. “MC... I’m sorry about your food...” you sighed. “Don’t worry about it Beel, now eat this shit. I know you’re hungry.”

Belphegor 

When he tried to kill you, your first thoughts were: Aight, time to kick this guy in the family jewels

And that you did. 

Though you still died, so your efforts were all in vain, and then you came back to life. You literally charged at him and pinned him to the ground, shouting profanities as the brothers tried to get you off of him. 

Honestly, you guys really wouldn’t get along that well. If he’s going to try to sleep, one way or another you’re going to stroll in arguing with one of his brothers. You were yelling loudly and swearing a bit too much that it caused Belphie to wake up, which in itself is an impossible achievement since Belphegor could literally sleep through an entire building construction even if it was all happening right beside him.

He’d be pissed that you woke him up, and then you’d forget your previous argument and focus on the one you currently having with the Avatar of Sloth.

He’ll be very happy when he sees you have fights with Lucifer, because nobody in their right mind would dare shout curse words and punch him in the gut, apart from him and Satan of course. When Lucifer locks you up in your room, he’ll make an attempt to help you escape your prison if he’s feeling generous. 

NOTORIOUS BARTENDER Z LAO ONCE AGAIN UNLEASHES A VERBAL STORM ON PAPARAZZI: "F*CK OFF!"

Surprise, surprise! Z Lao, the fiery bartender from one of the hottest celebrity hotspots, found themselves on tape once again, unleashing a torrent of profanity that would make even sailors blush.

But wait, there's more—in a shocking twist, they managed to snatch an innocent paparazzo's camera right out of their hands. Cue the chaos as all four paparazzi present attempted to reclaim it, but alas, victory eluded them. It took the intervention of two bystanders to wrestle Lao into submission as they defiantly declared, "I'll f*cking destroy your sh*t!" Witnesses say this mantra echoed like a broken record.

While Z Lao might not be winning any popularity contests with the paparazzi, there's no denying their magnetic pull on the high-profile nightclub crowd, who can't resist the allure of the bar, even if it comes with a side of drama.

Nepo baby Russel Grier, interviewed just outside the club last night, responded with laughter and some slightly intoxicated swaying when asked about the recent incident. "They're badass. We love them. In this f*cked up place with you f*cked up people following our every move, Z's got our back."

Chalk it up to the alcohol talking, my lovelies? We all know the paparazzi play a crucial role in keeping people like him relevant (cough cough nepo babies), so we won't take those inebriated words to heart. After all, you've got our back, right?

If you're feeling the love, show some by voting, sharing, and commenting on our social media pages 'PinkCelebTea'.

Stay fabulous, XOXO.

***

Ready for the full show? CLICK HERE to catch the video of the Z Lao altercation and relish all its highlights!

A Palestinian child's plans after the war

She wrote

1) 30 days delivery

2) watch the TV and stay up and eat all that I want

3) go wherever I want

4) talk with my father for hours everyday

5) buy a lot of cute clothes

6) travel insha'Allah and see my dad

7) convince my dad to travel to uncle Mostafa and uncle Mohammed

8) go out of gaza and go to Switzerland

In the end she wrote:

* insha'Allah my plans happen*

Her name was sila and she will never see those plans achieved because she was killed like many PALESTINIAN children .

End this genocide

And free Palestine 🇵🇸🇵🇸

I’ve been seeing a few cases of this happening, and I wish I didn’t have to make this post, but I am imploring all of you, all of you…

Please please please do not cancel and/or ask for a refund of a commission, be it art or writing, just because the artist or writer in question is Filipino. Our current situation is distressing and anxiety-inducing, and canceling commissions will only add to it. There is even the possibility that if another Marcos sits on the presidential seat, Paypal can pull out of the Philippines and prevent us from making transactions with people from other countries. We need all the help and support that we can get, whether through sharing information, through monetary support, and other things.

I will put this in the main Twisted Wonderland tag so that this gains more exposure. Please also reblog this around or even share to other social media platforms and share this to all other fandoms.

The world continues to look on

gofundme.com

Urgent: Help Evacuate Injured Dad Out of Gaza War, organized by Hussein Abukaresh

Dear Compassionate Supporters, I am reaching out to you with a p… Hussein Abukaresh needs your support for Urgent: Help Evacuate Injured D

Dear Compassionate Supporters,

I am reaching out to you with a plea that weighs heavily on my heart. My father, Ghoson Abukaresh, a 70-year-old Palestinian residing in Gaza, is facing unimaginable peril amidst the relentless conflict. As his daughter, I implore you to join me in a mission to secure his safety, well-being, and access to urgent medical care.

Ghoson, a resilient and determined individual, has endured the horrors of war, but the ongoing conflict in Gaza has presented him with challenges that surpass anything he has faced before. Following the destruction of our family home and neighborhood, my father sought refuge in an UNRWA clinic. Tragically, he was injured in an airstrike, sustaining severe wounds from shrapnel in his arm and foot. The shrapnel remains lodged in his body, causing excruciating pain and complications, further exacerbated by his diabetes and high blood pressure.

Here is a glimpse of my father's dire situation:

Ghoson Abukaresh, my beloved father, bravely battling the consequences of war.

Despite his suffering, my father remains steadfast in his desire for peace and security. He dreams of a life free from the turmoil of conflict, where he can live out his days with dignity and tranquility.

To facilitate my father's evacuation from Gaza and provide him with the urgent medical attention he needs, we are seeking your support. The funds raised will cover:

Surgery and medical treatment: €40,000This includes the removal of shrapnel, along with necessary medical procedures, medication and rehabilitation to ensure his recovery.

Travel expenses to a safe destination: €20,000Rafah Crossing fees: €10,000 the expenses associated with coordinating his safe passage through the Rafah border crossing to reach a place of refuge. This covers the costs associated with transporting my father to a location where he can receive adequate medical care and begin the process of rebuilding his life.

living expenses: €1,000 a month (a total of €6,000 for six months)This will provide for my father's basic needs, including accommodation, food, medication, and other essentials, for a period of six months.

Your generous contribution, no matter the size, will make a profound difference in my father's life. Together, we can provide him with the lifeline he desperately needs to access medical treatment and find safety away from the conflict zone.

Please consider sharing this campaign with your friends, family, and networks to amplify our reach and impact. Your support will bring us one step closer to securing my father's health and safety.

On behalf of my entire family, I extend my deepest gratitude for your compassion and support during this challenging time. Together, we can make a meaningful difference in my father's life and provide him with the security and care he so urgently requires.

With heartfelt thanks,

Lina

what's more romantic than the smell of cigarettes and rotting garbage under the moonlight? ♥