Hairy Men. Large Hairy Men. Big Big Large Hairy Men. Agree.

Diary Entry #11

Cw politics and sui again

I don't know what I can or should say about Trump winning. There is not a single word in the English dictionary that can express how angry I am, how disappointed I am at my fellow man. I've thought some pretty awful thoughts recently, both towards myself and towards others.

I do consider just ending my life sometimes, but I'm not going to be another statistic. I can't be. Unless I am truly backed into a corner, I'm not going to consider it an option just yet.

I hope these next 4 years will blow over, that we'll be okay, but I really fucking doubt it at this point. I thought the race was going to be close, that we stood a chance. But apparently all my hoping was for nothing.

My grandpa stayed up for a considerable amount of time watching Fox News, waiting for swing states to close, hoping that Trump won. I'm still pretending to be a conservative, but I'm afraid the hatred for that system of ideas will shine through somehow and that my cover will be blown.

I hardly can look my grandparents in the eyes right now. They voted red down the ballot. There's nothing I can say to convince them.

At this point, I just hope that the people who voted for that fool are happy at the chaos they are going to bring. I hope they're happy that the world is going to burn beneath us, hope they're happy that they're complicit in the suicides of trans people. Some of them probably are happy about the latter, but you know what I mean.

When the news first broke, I didn't feel much besides numb. But now I'm enraged, and probably will be for a long time. I just don't understand how it happened. All I'm hoping is that I can get out of my house before anything happens to get rid of my healthcare, but what about other people? They're still going to suffer. Woman and trans people will still suffer, really, everyone's going to suffer.

I don't know. Guess that's it for this entry.

*incredible art made by one of the official pvz comic artists, ron chan!

A meme I made, inspired by a Nyazsche comic

[/ID a comic where Donald Trump points to someone with a shirt that says "random trans person", and he says "You are an enemy of the state. I am actually going to murder you." The random trans person in return says "my brother in Christ, I am literally just a person,,," Comic inspired by a Nyazche comic about two cats. The cat with the propeller hat says "do you like my silly hat?" And the other cat replies "you are an enemy of Christ." The caption above says "this is what being a trans person feels like". /END ID]

I’M BACK BITCHES

True. Happened to me (I made the post not the art)

me: you literally have a disorder. this is symptoms

me: no perhaps my soul is rotten

The biggest example of someone not understanding a simple message of a KIDS show is when I saw "Fluttershy hates lesboys, be like Fluttershy!" I'm sorry but it is "friendship is magic" not "queer discourse is magic" she would not give a fuck, what are you talking about.

Diary entry #3

Hoooooo boy I am shaking so bad. I generally have a level of "shake" that I usually have, always a little twitchy and I get terribly lightheaded, shaky, and have to sit so I don't fall whenever I stand up (usually if I do it quickly.) But like I'm shaking so hard that it's kinda hard to type. Why? My stomach hurts. Sometimes it's just like that when I get nauseous.

Speaking of things I should probably talk to a doctor about! I think I might have OCD. I get straight up awful thoughts and I sometimes have to do something to fix them. I have a back and forth in my head constantly and it's fucking exhausting!!! But I am afraid that I'll be not allowed to go on T if I get a diagnosis (I'm already autistic so that could be something they could deny me for maybe). (Also don't know if I explained properly, sorry)

Some dude on reddit told me I probably don't have OCD because I'm autistic, idk if he's right. I know you can have both but it's possible I'm mistaking my autistic thoughts for OCD thoughts.

Well that's it I guess

DO NOT PARTICIPATE IN ANY GOVERNMENT STUDY!

I also would like to share something: For the past 3 years, I have worked as a Survey Research Interviewer at a local University of mine under the Public Health department, meaning I call random numbers of people to see if they want to do a health survey or not. The surveys we do are done all across the U.S., and recently, the most common survey that we do (that is under the State's health department and the CDC) added questions regarding sexual orientation and gender identity.

I just want to tell you that if you don't want to do the survey, please say something like "You're not interested," "Take me out of your list," or "Don't call me again." You can even curse us out if you wish to. Because if you just hang up on us, then we are forced to call your number again in the future (probably that same week or month). But if you say anything that I listed, then we will take your number off the list immediately.

If you do want to do the survey, don't mention anything about you being queer or trans/nonbinary. You can lie to us because we have no choice but to code the answer you've told us. I personally skip the question about sexual orientation and gender identity to protect whoever I'm interviewing because even though the survey we do claims to be anonymous, I live in a red state so I'm not taking any chances.

Please do what it takes to protect yourself these next 4 years.

Happy pride, my dudes! Felt like making a tradition of doing a redraw of last the year’s redraw! Good way of seeing improvement and getting back into the swing of things, methinks (I’m also counting this as birthday art sorta but totally not because I completely forgot when his birthday was hahaha shhh)

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Previous two years under the cut (eye contact tw):

2022:

2021: