Really, If We Tried, We Could Make Philomena Cunk A Tumblr Sexywoman.

In 4th grade, my bff was in a death feud over chess with a boy in our class but instead of competing like normal people they decided that the best way to determine who was chess master was for each of them to select one of the two biggest idiots in class and teach them to play chess, My Fair Lady style, and see whose idiot won. We are just now, 22 years later, grappling with the moral implications of this exercise.

death and the emperor!

what are y’all’s tarot birth cards?

mine are the tower and the chariot

Killed a spider n now I feel bad :/

do you think, for a potato chip, being dipped in an onion-based condiment is like seeing an old friend for the first time in years, both of you fundamentally changed and soon destined to die but nonetheless still here in this moment?

Excited for this outcome. Especially because Tumblr is so English-centric, even though a lot of people are not native speakers.

As always, reblog for a bigger sample size.

Put the actual language you write in in the tags!

BECOME UNFOLLOWABLE