alwaysmissingyou

Latest Posts by alwaysmissingyou

you have. metal illness?

a lil bitt

i’m full of rage but in a very chill and nonchalant way

"are you gonna get over this" lmao no

person: are you okay?

me, digging my own grave: what makes you say that

I need to go into the forest and scream for an hour and a half

my mind is a fucking nightmare.

Im so tired of existing in this mentally ill brain

Untitled (Layers of stuff building over time) 2014 David SHRIGLEY

I barely remember the last 6 months honestly like am I even alive

trauma didnt make me soft it’s made me angry and empty

My trauma didn’t make me soft. It made me distant. Angry. Distrustful. Bitter. Never soft. What they did was never soft.

“Every morning I sit at the kitchen table over a tall glass of water swallowing pills. (So my hands won’t shake.) (So my heart won’t race.) (So my face won’t thaw.) (So my blood won’t mold.) (So the voices don’t scream.) (So I don’t reach for knives.) (So I keep out of the oven.) (So I eat every morsel.) (So the wine goes bitter.) (So I remember the laundry.) (So I remember to call.) (So I remember the name of each pill.) (So I remember the name of each sickness.) (So I keep my hands inside my hands.) (So the city won’t rattle.) (So I don’t weep on the bus.) (So I don’t wander the guardrail.) (So the flashbacks go quiet.) (So the insomnia sleeps.) (So I don’t jump at car horns.) (So I don’t jump at cat-calls.) (So I don’t jump a bridge.) (So I don’t twitch.) (So I don’t riot.) (So I don’t slit a strange man’s throat.)”

— Jeanann Verlee, “Good Girl,” Said the Manic to the Muse

my therapist: I can't imagine how painful that must have been for you

me: lol so anyway

I have decided that nothing is embarrassing and now I'm even crazier than before

Everyday of my life 

*seductively slips into existential melancholy*

Jess Sharp

metal illness

An emotion: *pokes its head through the mountain of suppression I've buried it under*

Me, beating it with a stick: Back! Back!