I am the epitome of āfind the beauty in everythingā to the point where it makes me a bad driver because I keep getting distracted by grass and flowers on the side of the road on the notoriously dirty ugly American highways
Being a pessimist is like setting yourself on fire before walking into a burning building. Youāre not protecting yourself from getting burned youāre just doing it ahead of time
THANK YOU ALL FOR THIS SUPPORT!! ILYSM
Iām seeing my doctor for an antidepressant tomorrow morning.
Iāve had depression since I was 10. Any period of time where I felt happy or safe was always temporary. With some therapy I made it past some of the hardest years of my life, and when I realized I was going to keep living, I decided I didnāt need treatment. I never asked for meds, and I didnāt look for therapy after I aged out of the program I was in.
I didnāt have friends or family that supported me, or even offered to talk. I understand now that none of them would have known what to say.
I wasnāt living. I thought that surviving was the point, and for a while it was. I survived some things that I donāt wish on anyone, but now I want to live.
I want to get up in the morning. I want to spend time going to coffee shops and farmers markets and travelling. I want to romanticize my life, not just drag myself through it.
I donāt know how tomorrow will go. I donāt know if Iāll have to try ten different meds before something works but I want to try.
I spent 30 years scraping by, hoping tomorrow comes and goes quickly.
I want to live again. ļæ¼
r u capable of being optimistic?
m m mmm. iām capable of forcing myself to be optimistic
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