Emilio Murkmere - Blog Posts
Does Emilio still have his weird obsession with Tobias?
absolutely! He is obsessed with Tobias, but is much more tame about it. Kinda. He’s only tame about it because he has to be. Carmelo would beat the shiiiiit out of him if he did anything crazy…
Could you go a bit more in detail about how Emilio feels about Carmelo? Does he feel like he’s ruined his social life?
Mhm !
Emilio haaates him. He does feel that way, yes. Emilio is very scared of Carmelo, especially since the incident where Tobi and Emilio saw each other in the woods. He never feels safe at school, he feels like he could get jumped at aaaaany moment. A big reason why Emilio doesn’t have any friends now is because Carm will always warn the people he tries to interact with.
Does Emilio ever stop stalking Tobias?
Not really. He calms down, but is still somewhat present in his life when they are adults.
Rudy feeling good about himself albeit it, just torturing Emilio, makes me happy for himself. Emilio tried really hard, being Carmelo’s friend and to avoid being his victim, all of that to go crashing down. (I’m Not saying, he is getting bullied by carm or Rudy) just seeing his whole perfect plan ruined.
I have two questions, what are your overall feeling’s on Emilio in the aqua marine au and canon
And second question being. Emilio feeling paranoid and feeling deserving of what’s coming to him due to the regret about what happened to Tobias. Howeverby all the taunting from Rudy, does he feel like Rudy is bulllying him?
Thank you for the ask!!!
My thoughts on canon Emilio aren’t too great, same for Aquamarine Emilio. I think that Emilio’s actions got swept under the rug WAAAAY too quick, and is just a really odd way to depict sexual assault. I understand that victims can feel somewhat closer to the abuser after the assault occurs, but I think it was depicted in a way that is just too… Like. Comfortable? Tobias is very comfortable with Emilio, which is kinda like… I don’t understand that. That’s why I try to depict Tobias’s attachment to Emilio in Aquamarine Au as something that is harmful, and uncomfortable, and more accurate to how victims feel about their abusers. Aquamarine Tobias hates Emilio, but can’t help but feel like he needs the abuse to happen again to gain validation. Since being hurt is the only thing he has known, and his first “intimate” experience was painful, he craves it. I feel like this is a more accurate representation of SA instead of like… Tobias being all goody goody with Emilio. Aquamarine Tobias is HEAVILY based on my own thoughts and experiences and feelings. Anyway, I think I went on a little rant that was likeeeee not what the question asked … I’m not a fan of Emilio , and i try to make Aquamarine Emilio face consequences of his actions ^_^
Emilio does feel bullied, yes. I don’t think bullied is the right word actually … I think it’s more like. Harassed? He knows that he deserves it, but can’t help but feel extremely hurt by all of it. It is very overwhelming for him.
Does Carmelo ever find out that Emilio writes notes about them?
they don’t know for sure, but they doooooo heavily suspect it… It’s pretty obvious that Emilio is writing about them, he makes it extremely noticeable. Like. He’ll be staaaaring at them and frantically writing notes, bro…
Carmelo hates him, Rudy hates him, and even Dino and Francis don’t talk to him. How does Emilio feel in all of this… I like how you made this realistic and the feeling that actions do have consequences.
He does notttt feel good. It really starts to affect him. He is extremely paranoid now. Every time he sees Tobias, he thinks about walking up to him and apologizing for everything, hoping that would take all the weight off his shoulders, hoping they could put everything behind them. But he knows deep down that it wouldn’t do anything but make things worse.
Thank you ^_^
Since Carmelo has been spending a lot of time with Tobias, what do Francis and Dino think of him? Do they ever hang out together as well?
On a somewhat related note, what do Dino and Francis think of Emilio? Do they know why Carmelo has stopped talking to him?
i Kinda answered this in another ask! But I’ll go a little more into detail ^_^
Before they know that Carmelo has a thing for Tobias, Francis and Dino are iiiiicked outtttttt. They cannot comprehend that Carmelo is hanging out with THE Tobias … After they find out that Carm likes Tobi, they are a bit more respectful, but still confused… Eventually, they do start to hang out together! But that is way later in Tobi and Carmelo’s relationship ^_^
Dino and Francis don’t know much about the Emilio situation, however, they stopped talking to him because Carmelo begged them to. They were really conflicted about the whole thing, but sided with Carmelo after seeing how important it was to him.
Validation
One of tobias’s trauma responses is that he feels the need to put himself in danger to feel safe and secure. The feeling of being scared and hurt is familiar to him, causing him to seek validation from it.
Emilio is going through it, how bad does Rudy get for Emilio.
Rudy doesnt hold himself back at ALL… He wants Emilio to know how much he hates him, and to feel terrible for what he did. Emilio does not handle it well, he starts becoming more and more paranoid at school. It gets pretty bad
Basically, in this au, Rudy is just a huuuuge asshole to Emilio.
Aquamarine Au Rudy being a dick to Emilio ^_^
Aftermath (Accidental meeting pt 2)
Rudolph and Carmelo find out what happened.
Accidental Meeting
Tobias and Emilio end up seeing each other in the woods. Again
Why does Rudy even hang around Emilio?
He never really actively seeks out for him. They don’t hang out as friends, it’s mostly just if Rudy sees/is around Emilio, he’ll take the opportunity to fuck with him a little bit . Emilio thinks that they could get along, since they are both unhappy with Tobias and Carmelo being together. He thinks if Rudy gave him a chance, they could understand each other and maybe be friends. He is very wrong
Eventually , after all the taunting, Emilio starts to silently hate Rudy as well
”You know he hates you, right?”
Does rudy do this to cope, because now Emilio and rood’s relationship has kinda gotten worse now, maybe rudy thinks making someone else feel horrible will make himself less angry
YES!!! Rudy absolutely does this to cope. He HATES Emilio, but loves tormenting him. In a way, he also does this because he is trying to stand up for Tobias.
since we see Emilio and Rudy together often, does Rudy only taunt Emilio?
(hope I answer this right , let me know if I didn’t answer what you meant ^_^)
The only person that Rudy taunts is Emilio. He makes small comments towards Carmelo, yeah, but doesn’t taunt him like how he does to Emilio. Rudolph will push Emilio’s buttons a lot, especially with things based on Tobias. (Telling him that Tobias is forgetting him, Tobias hates him, Tobias is scared of him, etc.) it always makes Emilio feel like shit
”He’s going to forget you”
Rudy sometimes puts thoughts in Emilio’s head to mess with him, make him feel bad.
Ooohhhhh....what notes does Emilio write about them?..
addition to the other ask ^_^ Everything… Mostly about Tobias , though . He writes about how Tobias behaves with Carmelo , and compares it with how Tobias behaved around Rudolph. there is a big difference.
Do Emilio and or Rudolph ever try to break up Carmelo and Tobias?
They do not! Rudy usually minds his business. The most he’ll do is give dirty looks. Maybe a small comment towards Carmelo every once in a while.
Emilio is a little more extreme? He takes notes on them CONSTANTLY. like . Get a life , bro … Even if he doesn’t interact with them, he is allllways keeping an eye on them from afar.
But they do not try to break them up.
aquamarine au stuff ^_^
Carmelo and Tobi are both very anxious people. Carmelo does not want anyone to know about his relationship, especially his friends. Tobias gets anxious that he is a problem for Carmelo.
Emilio and Rudolph have been talking more since Tobias and Carmelo started seeing each other. Rudy still hates Emilio, but they both share their concern for Tobias and anger towards Carmelo. (Concerned and angry for different reasons , but still concerned and angry nonetheless)
How did Carmello react after Tobias told him about what Emilio did? And is Emilio ever confronted, is Rudolph ever made aware? And if so, how would Rudolph react? We're invested in your au 💜
AAAAAHHHHHH OKAY .
Carmelo was PISSED. He immediately cut off all contact with Emilio, blocked him, etc. When Tobias told him, he was a mess. He had only told Carmelo because Emilio was trying to get closer to Tobias, and he was afraid. Tobi didn’t really think that Carmelo would care, would just tell Emilio to knock it off and move on. But he was wrongggg… After this, Carmelo wouldnt leave Tobias’s side during school. He would walk him to and from classes, stick with him at all times, etc. It helped Tobias feel a lot safer. Emilio was not confronted. As much as Carmelo wanted to, Tobias did not want him to cause trouble. Rudy was aware of Emilio assaulting Tobias, he never forgot the night that Tobias told him. He never forgave Emilio for it either, of course.
Does rudy and Emilio know Toni’s situation and if so how do they feel?
By Tobi’s situation, I’m going to assume you mean that he is living with Carmelo and also in a relationship with him? correct me if I am wrong ^_^
Rudolph is veeeeery salty. He wanted Tobias to be happy, find other friends. HOWEVER!!! Seeing Tobias be with someone (Carmelo) who hurt him so badly makes him very upset. Rudolph feels disrespected, especially since Tobias knows everything Carmelo has put him through. He is somewhat happy though! Since Tobias and Carmelo have gotten closer , Carmelo doesn’t bother Rudy anymore. Barely even interacts with him.
Emilio, however… Is very very very upset. He still has an obsession with Tobias, and wants to be closer to him. Tobias has put a lot of distance between them , making Emilio a little less sane??? He doesn’t overstep boundaries , and he respects that Tobias and Carmelo are not talking to him anymore. But it drives him crazy
Ghost eyes doodles
GHOST EYES SWAP AU THINGY !!! ^_^
@murrkmere GAVE ME THIS IDEA !!!!!
Tobias <—-> Carmelo
Emilio <—-> Rudolph