Agatha All Along - Blog Posts
RIP TO MY QUEEN
idk if it’s just me but i can’t stop picturing this as agatha walking down the aisle to marry rio… not a traditional aisle, but one they made themselves.. it's quiet, sacred, and most importantly it's theirs.
it’s scattered with herbs, wildflowers, maybe some sigils drawn into the dirt. she’s holding a bouquet, maybe made under a blood moon, with flowers rio crafted just for her… or ones agatha gathered herself.
and in the middle of it all, it's daisies which are meant to show new beginnings, hope, and the kind of love that stays even through pain. 😭😭😭😭😭
and rio’s waiting there, waiting to marry the love of her life through a hand binding ritual..
with everything jac said—potions, wardrobe, choreography—
IDK AAA maybe it's because i miss them so bad but this vision really got to me.
Quick question, is anybody writing for Agatha All Along yet??
I watched the two available episodes and I'm already obsessed with it
I also realized if you shorten it it's AAA
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In a corner of Gaza, my family and I are drowning in destruction, with the echoes of suffering surrounding us. I sat beside my modest tent, hastily erected after losing my home in the latest bombing. The faces of my family tell stories of patience and resilience, with lines of time etched upon them, as if they were records of unforgettable events. 🇵🇸⏳🍉
I once lived in a small home, filled with the laughter and voices of my children. Today, I have become a witness to the agony of displacement. The bombing forced me to flee with my children after a shell struck our home, leaving behind years of memories and simple belongings I never imagined would become unreachable. 🏚️💨
Every morning, I leave my tent and go to work, using a clay oven to provide food for my children. Meanwhile, my youngest son heads to the charity kitchens that offer aid, waiting for long hours under Gaza’s scorching sun. Despite the exhaustion that weighs down his frail body, he carries the food mixed with his tears and returns with a fake smile, hiding behind it the burdens of his struggles. 🍞🥀
At night, when everyone else is asleep, I remain seated at the entrance of my tent, gazing at the dark sky, reminiscing about days gone by… about my home that was once filled with warmth. Yet, I still find remnants of hope in my heart—a hope that one day peace will return, and my children and I will live in a new home, filled with joy. 🌙🏡✨
In moments of solitude, I find peace in prayer and supplication. I plead to God to protect Gaza and its people, to wipe away the dust of sorrow from our hearts. I always repeat🇵🇸🍉🌿
"We are here to remind the world that we are stronger than war, and we will rebuild our lives anew, no matter the cost!" 🙏
getting absolutely no homework done, just thinking about a agathario ten things I hate about you au
My reaction to episode five of Agatha All Along:
I was watching a video of Patti Lupone with my friend when I made the comment that Patti Lupone sounds like a gay man and my friend argued that gay men sound like Patti Lupone and I can't believe I DIDNT come up with that
whos been messin up everything
its been wanda all along
whos been ruining all those evil strings
its been wanda all along
shes not incideous
ha ha
stops the perfidious
betcha didnt even notice and the pity is
the pity is
the pity, pity, pity, pity
its too late to fix anything
now that all your plans have gone wrong
thanks to wanda
yeah, wanda
its been wanda all along
and i cast all those runes too!
They really love him
Billy: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Jen: Several traffic violations. Agatha: Three counts of resisting arrest. Alice: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Lilia: Also, that’s not our car.
This is the greatest thing ever
trick or treat!!
(headcanons? for the coven maybe?)
(continuity- the fabled crack!fic)
Alice- the only morning person among a coven of night people. Really enjoys jogging, was very into death metal for a while as a rebellion against her mother, gets into making artisan beers and funky stained glass pieces after the Road. refused to let anyone help her magically move her mother's piano, which created a fairly amusing scene for the Proctors/John one Saturday afternoon as they attempted to get the thing in the house.
Lilia- the only motherfucker who can cook in this entire damn household (wanda is her most eagar apprentice). has considered hexing the kitchen to keep everyone else out. once did hex everyone involved when she walked in on unnamed individuals playing texas hold 'em with tarot cards from the 17th century. absolutely refuses to help agatha to short the stock market (again).
Jen- if she's going to be stuck with you people, you're at least not going to embarrass her; the coven wide skincare situation has never been more on point. brings billy with her to a couple of beauty/youtube cons, and he becomes a popular feature on her channel. does product testing on rio; the more rio enjoys it, the more toxic something is. senor scratchy oversees the process. sets up her lab upstairs in the former office "because not all of us lurk in basements like stereotypes, agatha."
Billy- living his absolute best life. frequently has the Kaplans over; he can't live with them anymore b/c of the insane amount of risk his physical person and the near constant presence of the scarlet witch and agatha thee harkness causes. he started a scoreboard in the living room, where he tallies up beings that come to the house looking to revenge/challenge- agatha's winning, but wanda's not far behind. everyone else is lumped into one category and losing badly. the kaplans are... adjusting. there is a lowkey conspiracy to teach rebecca witchcraft. he keeps eddie away for as long as possible, and then tries to introduce him to each of his new relatives one at a time. this does not go well.
Rio- is really only hanging out to see if she can drive wanda or agatha over the edge and into another killing spree. everything else is just her fucking around for her own amusement. does weird shit on purpose- eats raw meat and insects just to gross everyone else out. is not allowed unsupervised with the kaplans. built a complex terrarium set up for the tarantula, and frequently shape shifts to join him in there. the tarantula's name is typhon. the garden situation in the backyard has never been more lush and/or deadly. lilia and jen are never short on ingredients, but usually triple check to make sure what they're grabbing.
Wanda- has never been more understood in her entire life and is absolutely mystified. the first time she and jen get in an argument, and wanda accidentally breaks something- she freezes, expecting a wave of fear. jen just laughs and points, breaking a plate too with a swirl of rose gold sparkles. they spent the next ten minutes cheerfully breaking agatha's third best china until she busts them, and joins in too. no one particularly cares if wanda's too damaged, about how many people she's killed, if she can't control her powers, if she can't quite remember how to move like a human being. one way or another there's someone here who gets it- and that's the strangest part of all.
Agatha (all along)- unfortunately in charge here. couldn't give less of a shit about it. having to adjust to being around witches she's not actively trying to kill, while being her own weird ass self, not one of her personas. unclear what this strange feeling is in her chest (it's happiness- she's just never met it, so the sensation is alien). is the first to read whoever fucked up today into the ground. is also the first to kill anyone who looks at her coven sideways. experiencing the mortifying ordeal of being known and being very, very undignified about it. the rabbit continues to live like a tiny king. exploring other hobbies that aren't murder/plotting murder/scheming on how to plot a murder.
Being a part of the Marvel and 9-1-1 fandoms on Tumblr right now is so funny because on one side everyone is going crazy about the gay witches and waiting for Wednesday and on the other everyone is going crazy about the gay firefighters and waiting for Wednesday
Maybe the divine mother Lilia mentioned?
Who decides the rules of magic and witchcraft in the MCU? According to Agatha, Billy taking over the dying William’s body broke some “rules” that would make him a target for other witches. But unlike the Masters of the Mystic Arts who are answerable to the Sorcerer Supreme, witches really don’t seem accountable to anyone if they aren’t in a coven. So what rules are Agatha talking about exactly?
The way this makes so much sense
okay agatha all along episode 6 spoilers and also possibly absurdly outlandish theory incoming
i have a theory about lilia putting the sigil on billy. i assume she put it on him because she saw something that would endanger him if everyone immediately knew who he was and i initially foolishly assumed she was referring to agatha because you know. agatha is mildly unhinged after all
but I'm starting to think it's rio....because there's the theory going around that rio is death personified and honestly it makes so much sense. she can't kill agatha because death can't Kill others, it can only come when it's called. her power would kill agatha because it's a death domain power and either it's innate to her and only she can handle it, or you can only earn death related abilities a certain way. (also she's THE green witch. ashes to ashes and dust to dust etc every body returns to the earth)
in episode 5 she mentions that she hates ghosts which makes sense because she'd see them as perverting the natural cycle and clinging onto a semblance of life after death. so what on earth do we think rio would do if she knew that Billy's soul was possessing someone who's supposed to be dead? somehow i don't think it'll be pretty.
the sigil breaks at a weirdly specific point, too. it's after agatha kills alice, which means that rio is going to be preoccupied for a little while at least, giving billy and Agatha some time to discuss things. and if rio is death then agatha is likely the only person who knows that, and if we're getting technical the sigil only breaks once AGATHA concretely puts together that teen is billy.
lilia's divination works VERY weirdly, she's all out of time and often doesn't seem to remember her premonitions, but I would bet that the sigil was created with the knowledge that it would be broken once agatha specifically was the one to put the pieces together. because agatha knows rio and therefore she knows death. and we've seen already that agatha is VERY emotionally intuitive, it's what makes her so good at being a dickhead to others because she reads tells and emotional wounds so easily and knows exactly when she's hit a nerve. so i wouldn't put it past her to know Rio thoroughly enough to be the one to keep billy safe from her.
i just think the timing of the reveal is all very coincidental. not like, bad writing or anything, but the fact that agatha figures out it's billy AND has a whole emotional reunion with him with every other member of the coven missing feels a lot like Fate (which would probably come under lilia's domain). because now agatha and billy have an understanding of each other that will make it easier for them to walk the road together, but ALSO, nobody else knows. and agatha, who knows that rio is death and knows how rio feels about breaking the life-death cycle, can keep it a secret for him. she can protect him, even if he doesn't trust her.
anyway theory over but i swear to god billy and agatha better have the most lovely found family story arc. billy claims he doesn't need agatha but agatha has already adopted him in wanda's stead because she remembers being angry at the world like he is. oh and also she knows he does need her because death could be after him now lol
I NEED someone to tell me what is the deal with witches and crowns in the mcu. In the comics I'm pretty sure they're there for just fashion, but, in the mcu most of the important witches have them and it makes me wonder what does it mean?
If a crown appears because a witch is really powerful then it would explain why witches such as: Wanda, Billy and Rio have them. The formers are capable of controlling chaos magic to warp reality to their whims, and Rio is literally death, the orginal green witch. However, if this was truly the case Agatha should already have a crown aswell. She's been alive for a long time and has had acess to the darkhold which overtime corrupts the user but also gives them the means to use powerful magic.
Another reason a crown manifests may be to signify mastery over one's ability to the point where they have complete control over their own magic as seen with witches like: Evanora (Agatha's Mother) and Rio. The former being alive for so long which gave her a lot of time to truly master her own magic, and once again Rio who is a living concept and the original green witch. But, if that truly were the case Wanda and Billy should not have gotten their crowns so soon and Lilia should have gotten one at the end of her trial. Until Agatha came along Wanda didn't even know she was using magic and after realising who she was meant to be did the crown fully appear. Billy's crown just fully manifested after he used magic to control Jen and Lilia to push them along with Agatha off the road, no mastery whatsoever. Meanwhile Lilia has been alive for a long time, has shown to have lots of knowledge about the way of witches and the way magic works. Her crown appearing like a construct of light like Wanda's did in Wandavision before it fully manifested would have amplified this theory.
One more theory I have is that crowns manifest for witches who are important to the mcu's timeline so Wanda, Billy, Rio and Evanora having crowns is justified. But again that leaves out Agatha who is arguably more important than Evanora in the mcu and Jen (although I'm not 100% sure) who was the first witch to survive the witches road and get her prize which was her powers returning to her. Maybe we'll see her in another mcu project and she'll have a crown with her new outfit but that's a big maybe.
Enough days have passed and I still haven't seen any fanfics where everyone survives the witch's road. Where is it, where are my good ending fics?
Justice for Tommy Maximoff because that little angel loves his twin so much!!! He was born first so he is technically the older brother and he totally acts like it.
When Billy reveals his powers for the first time, Tommy isn’t jealous at all, he’s just like “whoa!!” with a huge smile, thinking his brother is so cool for being able to do that.
When Billy becomes tense as he senses their dad is hurt, Tommy immediately notices and asks “are you okay??”
When Agatha has them both in a chokehold, Tommy screams “LET GO OF MY BROTHER!!!”
When their mom tells them to hide, Tommy grabs Billy and runs.
When Billy becomes tense again as he foresees their mom’s confrontation with the townspeople, Tommy immediately notices again and asks “what’s wrong??”
When they work together to take out the S.W.O.R.D. agents, Tommy gives Billy a hi-five.
That boy better come back soon because he deserves to live as much as Billy does.
Edit: And now we know Billy is looking for him aaaaaaaagh! Pleaaassee let them find each other, Jac Schaeffer, I’m begging you.
Agatha when the door to the road™️ appeared knowing damn well she made the whole thing up:
Spoilers for Agatha All Along.
Could you imagine being one of those witches that died trying to summon the road with Agatha? Like I can imagine them dying, becoming ghost and seeing Agatha pull the same shit with this new coven, expecting it to turn out the same way it did for them but it actually works.
I just know those witches would be like "Here she goes again– wait a minute! WTF?!"
LILIA NOOOOOO! There are actual tears in my eyes. She could've survived if she just went along with them (I'm delusional). 😭😭😭
I'm mentally preparing myself for episode seven of Agatha All Along because I KNOW as much as I want her to Lilia isn't surviving and it makes me sick to my stomach.
Spoilers if you haven't watch the latest episode yet:
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QUEEN DOWN QUEEN DOWN!
First Ms. Davis and now Alice. That trial better had been an illusion or something because we CANNOT just lose her that quickly. She not too long got done vanquishing a curse that has been plaguing her family for generations and she finally got her chance to have some peace in her life all for them to kill her? No! 😭
Gay people make me sick (I need their type of love carved into my flesh)
gay people can’t ever be normal after a breakup they gotta say some shit like “she is my scar” and then almost kiss
what if you were GAY and your girlfriend was the personification of DEATH and then your SON died and she had to reap his SOUL or whatever because it was her JOB and then you never forgave her but she still LOVED you and then you projected your GRIEF onto a random teenager while battling through DEATH trials with PATTI LUPONE
Brad Winderbaum: Agatha All Along brought in a HUGE, new wave of marvel fans!!!
The new fans in question:
Surprise Speeches by InkAndPoison
Famous actress, Agatha Harkness, at award seasons with her devoting speech writing wife, Rio Vidal.
A Crack Two Part Story about Rio's ridiculous acceptance speeches she has written for Agatha. Agatha has no idea what she is about to say until she is up on stage accepting her awards.
Someone is getting a tarot reading and the first card is Death
The person doing the reading explains that death is usually a metaphor, and refers to a large change
The second card is The Tower
They explain that the tower often refers to tragedy when asked if that means death they say it can but doesn't always
The third card is Someone Is Actually For Real Going To Die
Random funny scene idea I've had in my head:
Billy to Agatha: I want to be a witch! Teach me how to be a witch!
Agatha: ooh sorry kid you can't call yourself that- you see that's a bit problematic with the whole you being Jewish and all, they'll cancel us so fast. You can be a.... A wizard though! I think. A wiccan maybe?
AGATHA EPISODE 5 I WAS NOT READY FOR YOU
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!!!!!!
ok so tbh i think he is def wandas son, bc she says ur js like u mother and then starts mind controlling jen and lilia like please holy please
i fear i cried during agatha all along last night when lornas version was playing and the "if i cant reach u let my song teach u" part played because it was like this mother who would do anything for her daughter and i was raised by a single mother and i just felt how alice felt and especially how she must've after resenting her for so long. holy crap im never ever getting over it
this had to be shared