Actual Footage Of Me Post-season Two Trying To Figure Out Who ISNT Related At This Point:

oh!! my!!! god!! i relate to this so much! but in my case it's all about russian literature. honestly, i was so shocked when i discovered booktube and da community and found out that some of you guys are reading dostoevsky and tolstoy because you want to and not because you have to do it in order to pass your exams. i still remember reading «crime and punishment» in a couple of nights like crazy because we've had so much to get through in a year. i hated it with all my heart. and it shouldn't be like that. however, thanks to this community i've looked at russian literature from a different perspective. now i really want to reread a lot of books and enjoy reading them instead of worrying about my grades and essays.

When i first found out about dark academia and people learning latin or greek i was lowkey shook?? I didn't know that by greek they meant ancient greek. The fact that people choose to learn ancient greek on their own will while I and other greeks have to study it and take exams all throughout our middle school and high school years is unfair. Education here has a way of ruining everything. Y'all out there reading The Iliad and The Odyssey for fun while we have to analyse and study the whole thing so that later we dont fail our exams. It's all so forced. You have the privilege of free will but it's necessary for us. And I'm not saying i hate ancient greek or anything I'm just saying that if i had the chance to learn it for myself and not to get good grades i would've enjoyed it a lot, a lot more. Because I've tried to enjoy it at school, but the way it's taught is not doing it.

my favorite love language is trying, actually

you're allowed to be messy, you're allowed to fuck up, you can be emotional and stupid and frantic and confusing and weird and any other embarrassing thing. anyone who makes you feel otherwise, or who makes you feel like you're walking on egg shells, like you're doomed if you slip up, they shouldn't be such a big part of your life.

francis abernathy

my grandma's apartment screams light academia and i'm living for it.

when you first moved in with me, you got a new vase. i’ll buy you flowers and we’ll put them there, – you said. for two years it remained empty on the windowsill, covered with a coat of dust.

when you moved out, you left some things behind. the empty vase, a little toy your late mother bought for you when you were a kid, a mug i gifted you for your birthday. things of no importance.

i can see everything a little bit clearer now. you never cared for little things – not really.

i think i’m going to buy some flowers for myself.

the secret history obsessed bitches be like „I know a spot” and then push you off a cliff

wholesome student life things that we should collectively start romancizing

waking up and being genuinely thrilled to go to class because today is THAT CLASS you love so much you’d like it to never end

coffee breaks with friends, chatting and joking about this particularly hard essay and the prof’s mannerism

coffee breaks on your own, as you absent-mindedly watch the people around you, while thinking about what you’re working on

finding this book you’ve been dying to read for so long, and borrowing it from the library

the feeling of excitement that goes through you whenever you remember The Book is in your backpack

understanding everything during demanding classes and being genuinely interested in the subject

buying a New Special Pen and taking colorful notes that look super pretty

not being able to shut up about your school projects (no your friends dont really care about the intricate details of what you’re working on, they don’t even have the same major as you, but they’re happy to hear you rant with such a burning passion)

actually doing the extra reading and having your curiosity so piqued by what you’re reading that you go on and on and suddenly its 1am and what happened

printing the project you’ve spent so much time and energy on and feeling the paper’s warmth

actually submitting that project without feeling awful about it because you know you did your best and aren’t responsible for what happens next

when you finally finish this Super Hard And Important Essay at like 3am, open the window and feel the cold night air on your burning cheeks and everything is dark and quiet and you can see the moon and you’re at peace with everything for a few minutes

when this professor you admire says you did a great job and/or that you’re talented!!!!

realizing two concepts that seemed so far away from each other and that you discovered in wildly different contexts are actually interlinked, then Realizing™ things and linking concepts/works/articles to each other at the speed of light & being super excited about it

being so deeply immersed in your work that you didn’t realize two hours have passed

finding the Perfect Spot at the library

that Pure Joy moment when you FINALLY understand that super obscure sentence/text

when you feel anxious because you’re not done with your homework & the deadline is super tight & your friend tells you they aren’t done yet either

same but with an even more intense relief feeling when you realize you both haven’t even started yet

when the professor starts a new reasoning and you can predict what the next idea/the final conclusion will be

when the professor mention your favorite novel/author/fictional character in class and you feel like your internal screech of joy could shatter glass

the Academic Salt™ that has you like 👀👀

when the professor tears apart an author or scholar you hate and you’re like YES I WANT BLOOD GIVE ME BLOOD

when you learn that Cool New Fact that makes you reconsider your whole life

leaving the library after a long productive day and feeling like nothing is real but experiencing everything more intensely

leaving the library at night after a long study session and everybody has left already and its just you and the long neon-lit corridors then stepping outside and smelling the crisp night wind

feel free to add your own!!!