I Think I Would Be So Much Funnier If I Was German

WOW so talented!

is this blog stupid? yes. but which one of us is following it?

You ever notice how a washing machine 10 minutes is actually about 17 minutes human time

Can they stop saying it's a 1d reunion,it's so fucking disrespectful,nobody in their right mind should care about this when one of them is being buried

sundays should be 48 hours long. 24 for enjoying sunday other 24 for mentally preparing for monday

it’s never too late. for anything: to apologize, to chase a dream, to try again, to forgive, to pick up a hobby, to fall in love, to change. you can do it whenever you want

no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, exponential, logarithmic, while I gasp for air, scream and see the light, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy, backwards, sideways, upside down, on the floor, in the bed, on the couch, on a chair, being carried against the wall, outside, in a train, on a plane, in the car, on a motorcycle, the the bed of a truck, on a trampoline, in a bounce house, in the pool, bent over, in the basement, against the window, have the most toe curling, back arching, leg shaking, dick throbbing, fist clenching, ear ringing, mouth drooling, ass clenching, nose sniffling, eye watering, eye rolling, hip thrusting, earthquaking, sheet gripping, knuckles cracking, jaw dropping, hair pulling, teeth jitterbug, mind blogging, soul snatching, overstimulating, vile, sloppy, moan inducing, heart wrenching, spine tingling, back breaking, atrocious, gushy, creamy, beastly, lip biting, gravity defying, nail biting, sweaty, feet kicking sex

Men are more interesting in books than they are in real life.

In another universe the boys weren’t overworked, in another universe the boys were protected from older women and the media. in another universe maybe zayn stayed. in another universe the boys reconciled. in another universe they remained brothers until they were old and gray. in another universe liam recovered and found peace.