- Toji Fushiguro
cr: Sally_Chang_ on twitter
My boyfriend was on the phone with his dad yesterday so I went out to sit on the patio to pet the geese and play on my phone for a bit, and while out there I came across a comic of baby Grimace (yes, that Grimace) being sad because everyone hated his milkshake and saying he wished he never had a birthday. Then there was a follow up where tons of people had commented saying they loved the shake and wished Grimace a happy birthday, and that made him happy again.
This, for whatever reason, emotionally devastated me. I was sobbing. I was ugly crying so bad that even the geese waddled away side-eyeing me.
After a while my bf yelled from inside, "Okay, you ready for dinner?" and I was forced to accept I had to go back in the house a defeated sniffly little wreck.
My boyfriend, who has only ever seen me cry once in the whole year we've been together, looked horrorstruck. He assumed the worst. Someone got hurt. Something was wrong with my family. Someone was mean to me (a cardinal sin). The panic that washed over his face was unparalleled.
He, upon seeing me, (somewhat theatrically) rushed over and grabbed me by the shoulders. "What's wrong, what happened? Are you okay?" he asked, frantic. "What is it?"
I realized how ridiculous the whole situation was and just shook my head.
He was growing more panicked. "What is it? Why are you crying?"
I then had to stand there and look him, this completely normal human being, in the eyes, and blurt out "Grimace"
Confused silence followed.
"....Grimace?"
I nodded.
"...The McDonalds guy...thing?"
I nodded.
"What...what did...Grimace...do to you?"
I then tearfully recounted the silly internet comic that had absolutely broken my heart. And this poor guy--this poor, wonderfully sweet, nice, patient guy--kindly stood there trying to figure out how to comfort me that Grimace was not, in fact, sad. (Nevermind that he's a corporate mascot who isn't real)
This morning my phone rang just after 5am. It was my boyfriend. It was my turn to panic, to assume the worst.
I didn't even have time to say hello before he started excitedly yelling, "Look at the TikTok I just sent you! Look! Open it!"
Confused and not entirely convinced I wasn't still asleep, I opened the TikTok.
An official release from McDonalds confirming Grimace (who still isn't real) did, in fact, feel special on his birthday.
when exactly is uptown funk gon give it to me?
Alexander McQueen Fall 2019 RTW
hey i made a quiz for which hq school you’d attend. u can take it if u want!!
just sent my irl best friend an incredibly risky fukinf link WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN WITH HER SPECIFICALLY i will shove my head in an oven
I love when dogs and cats just let you pat the shit out of them and they enjoy it so much. Like yeah dude real quick I just need to play you like a bongo and they’re like god yes I’ve been waiting for someone to play me like a bongo
yeah no offense to confucius or anything but if i was about to embark on a journey of revenge i would simply not dig two graves