having a fursona is cool because you can draw them wearing cute outfits you wish you owned and it’s absolutely free
now, i absolutely should be studying. but.
i have officially gotten to a place where i romanticize my own existence.
the way my shoes dirty and scuff after a day across campus
the way the leaves fall around me when i walk under trees
the way my spotify playlist is curated to exactly what i want to hear
the way my t voice still crackles sometimes
i am so, so happy to be alive.
dear all transqueers struggling to be alive: i love you so much. i love us so much. you can find happiness <3
(head feels like it’s shifted into a noticeably “masculine” space as an effect of wearing that grey coat around everywhere. i think i have to start bringing, like, skirts back into rotation if i want to feel “normal” again, which is to say, if i want my stream of thoughts to stop feeling endlessly “snarky” in a way that does in my heart feel attributable to the grey coat
one could call this negotiation a bit cool & fluid & queer but only insofar as it occurs with respect to a self-perception that would seem in the first place to be gendered to a point of embarrassment, i mean, having my brain affected by a coat)
picks up a jar containing the parenthesized thoughts floating in formaldehyde & inspects it closely… hmm well is it really that bad to be snarky sometimes, what’s the problem
The weirdest thing I never really anticipated about transition is that the things I saw attractive in other people would happen to me on testosterone
What if I kind of wish I was a guy but I’m 5’2” and have massive childbearing hips and titties. I feel like transition would be so much work and I wouldn’t even be hot at the end :(
everyone feels that and then everyone is surprised by how hot they are, because hotness is in large part a function of comfort with yourself
MARIO DOOBLES!!!
I was making up a sequel in my head about Luigi being the hero, but it ended up being all about Daisy instead. And I'm okay with that!