xevrq

Latest Posts by xevrq

orv tumblr valentines!!! (the watermark is my twt)

Important notice.

I know some of ya'll would think why I never write here, its just idk man I lost my fair share of interest in writing, beside this fucking blog of mine is literally memory rummage of my 2021-2022 self and idk I just feel weirded out when I looked back at it.

And beside I'm sorry but I'll be archiving this blog and yes I'll be moving blog, to where? Idk not telling hehe, if you see this just think of it as a silly grave for xevrq.

And yes I'll still be reblogging shit on here, have a nice day.

1863rd yjh

[1863]

They were standing out in the blood rain for a while…maybe clean up a little

(ft. my patented 1863 KDJ carefully Not losing his cool expression)

As (alleged) ceo of yoohankim I have made it my mission to respond to all of the birthday art I received this weekend 🫡 we are stimulating the Economy!!! Most of the originals are on my Twitter, so go check them out!

Stay tuned for more :)

“ you left me no choice but to stay here forever. ”

EVERMORE — A 4.5K MILESTONE SPECIAL SERIES !

SYPNOSIS. years after a breakup with your first love, kamisato ayato, you thought you’ll never see him again in your life since that fateful night, until you received an invitation to his wedding as well as a free-week stay in a 5* hotel, something you definitely do not want to pass on. when you arrived, you didn’t expect to meet a strange yet aloof man get along with him easily… and perhaps end up becoming something more by the time this trip ends. (or not)

CHARACTERS. diluc ragnvindr, kamisato ayato, zhongli, thoma, raiden shogun, yae miko, yoimiya, arataki itto, kujou sara, sangonomiya kokomi, gorou, kamisato ayaka, kaeya alberich, tartaglia, and more ! (w/ gn!reader)

TIME. new chapter will be posted once a week at 00:00 / 21:00 GMT+8 !

TAGLIST. @kazu-topia @coleluuviida @elychee @rion-s @denkineptune @franini @sophisticatedleslie @thedivinepriestress @smashsubs @httpmitsuya @bl6o6dy @cottonkendi @uchihaeirin @abvolat @kokushiboswife @crowleysthings @kyomihann @prplbunny @jiyujinsstuff @durptwit @elegantcecile @crowbird @mnemosyneechan @bananazzzen @s-adidass @belovedxiao @deimmortales99 @veyu002 @axeybelle09 @suzuyamitsuki @seungmouu @thraetor @chimsblogg @akemeru @headintheclouddd @bea-tan @ys14a @beef-stew @instantyouthpainter @henryjekyllsimp @leaunce @goth-cutie3 @katsumikumo @kitto-lover @q-zrs @accurateakane @otomaniac @notemika @yeonatingz @reveltica @ryobf69 @aria-haru @phoenixdrake88-blog @jiejievas @adanfore @iea-tsand @soanchorrebel @shiningddeonghwa @ikilledsparky2 @ducksonfanfiction (please visit this post if you’d like to be tagged!)

AUTHOR’S NOTE. this series is based on taylor swift’s album evermore and it is not aimed for fluff lovers and solely for angst lovers. if you wish to see a diluc x reader fluffy series all the way, proceed to versadies’s versions of chapters 13-epilogue once you arrive to those chapters. please read with caution ! (warnings will be written in each chapter).

MASTERLIST.

prologue // right where you left me

chapter one // willow

chapter two // champagne problems

chapter three // gold rush

chapter four // ‘tis the damn season

chapter five // tolerate it

interlude // no body no crime

Keep reading

In Black And White

Contract marriage au ft. Childe

[1] - vassal and friend

[2] - a failed gamble

[3] - duty means sacrifice

[4] - new chapter, old friend

[5] - just sign here

[6] - TBD

Taglist open! Send an ask to be added!

[ @aezuyu @yinyinggie @ayatoforlife @eowinthetraveler @tartaglia-apologist @who-is-saylynn @theblueblub @stcrfeesh @boundedbyfate ]

The way your writing is so fucking good?? It’s such a joy to read and you have such a distinct style that has me straight up kicking my feet :’)

I saw in your bio that requests are open, have you ever considered… reader getting hurt somewhere far from civilisation and Leon running himself absolutely ragged trying to get them help? Just holding them so tightly, running until his heart feels like it’s about to burst because he just needs them to be okay, I feel like he would stop at nothing to keep from losing the people he loves, ya know?

Anyway, hope you have a great day! <3

thank u so much aaaa <3333!!!! im feelin sad and devious so have fun with this one!!!

warning: angst, blood mention, death

Leon can’t remember the last time he cried.

He’s lived through suffering and destruction and death, and pieces of those memories still reside within him as little fragments of glass that puncture and tear and burrow. He’s tried to move on, to grit his teeth and bear the pain, but it always comes back. Always worse than last time.

You bleed a dark pool into the patch of grass you had collapsed upon. Touching your chest leaves his hands slick and sticky. The knees of his pants stain.

He radios in to HQ, calls for evacuation, medevac, help. The line statics. The BSAA soldiers are miles away by now.

It was supposed to be a cleanup, a simple job, and now you’re dying.

He doesn’t think straight. He can’t now. He loves you, and you’re dying, and he’s failed everyone he’s ever cared about.

As he strips off your gear, he thinks of Raccoon City. As he cuts away your shirt, he thinks of his parents.

Who does he have left? Who, besides you?

He whispers things (I love you, stay with me, it’s alright, I love you, don’t leave me, I love you), and you’re choking. Trying to speak. The light drains from your eyes and still, you cup a chilled, wet hand over his jaw.

“‘m okay,” you say, hoarse and choked-out. So weak. Weak and pallid and he’s never felt so helpless in his entire fucking life.

The blood won’t stop. He recalls his training and second-natures the first-aid steps, but the smell of iron makes him nauseous and your weakening grip on his shirt rips away his reason.

He picks you up, and he runs.

If he remembers right—please let him remember right—Delta team heads west. He can reach them. He can reach them and the medic they travel with. They’ll patch you up and call for medevac and you’ll survive.

He can’t fail you. Not again. Not like the others.

The path is uneven, and stray branches catch his clothes, and his lungs heave to the point of bursting, and he might collapse soon. You might die.

But he’s stubborn and strong-willed, and he has to see things through to the end.

That’s what I love most about you. He remembers the way you had smiled, all toothy and jesting. Smeared head-to-toe with dirt after following him to the ends of the earth, after crawling into a collapsed bunker owned by some retired Umbrella scientist to save him. Maybe you could be a little more careful about it, though.

The moment he realized he loved you.

It terrified him at first. Becoming soft again, tender-hearted, lovesick.

Later, when you said you loved him, when he admitted his own secret, when he kissed you in the quiet shadows of that warehouse, he knew he was done for.

His knees buckle, and he collapses. Mud seeps through his pants, chills down to bone, but he never lets you go.

The comms still ring with static. 

Delta team is nowhere to be found.

Your body rests limp against his chest. The blood has stopped, now thick and half-dried on his skin. On yours.

He stares down at you. At the ash of your complexion. At the glassy eyes, void of light, wide-open, fixed to a point just over his shoulder. When he tilts your chin, skin cold against his fingers, your unbroken gaze follows.

Already, he misses their color. The starshine when you looked at him. The wrinkle of your brow when you grew angry. The scrunch of your face when you smiled.

Already, he speaks of you in past tense. 

Your chest never expands again. Your heart never thumps beneath his palm. There’s no pulse—he checks three places three different times.

The comms spark to life with a message from HQ. Bird on standby, Delta team half a mile due west. Respond… respond… Respond.

He looks down at you—you, who believed in him, who taught him what love felt like, who followed him to the ends of the earth—now a corpse, another failing, another memory of jagged edges and broken glass.

And he cries.

GO GO

GOOD MORNING! FEAT: CHILDE, AYATO, AND DILUC

CHILDE

he sleeps in whale pajamas he's had snice he was 8 years old.

they don't fit him anymore, so he just wears the top to sleep

snores loud af

(please stfu)

plays some stupid ass noise to help him sleep

he can't wake up fast enough to make it to morning meetings

so you usually make breakfast most days

when (if) he does wake up, he'll just stand there. watching you. with his beady little blue eyes "childe, please let go..." you needed to get to a very important meeting in the morning, and your boyfriend just wouldn't let go. and you were running short on time "childe i need to go to a meeting." since you weren't even close to his strength, he had you traped until he wanted you to leave the covers. "just...just 5 more minutes darling." he was drooling on your arm, his leg lazily tossed over yours, forever trapping you. "no, childe. let me go." you started playfully thrashing around to get an attempt to scurry out of bed and run away before he could drag you back in. and the most chide did was let out a groan. and it didn't help that you were getting pretty close to falling back asleep, probably as childe planned. "just.. just 5 more minutes ok y/n? then we can go and-" you took him relaxing to toss yourself out of bed, on the floor, with a thud. "PFFT-" childe stifled laughter, well looks who was finally awake. "FUCK-" you rolled onto your back, groaning in pain "can you wake up now childe?" you slowly made your way back on your feet. "no, well-" his grabby little hands reached out to grab you "no, i can't wake up." and now back to square one, stuck in his arms. "childe-" "shhh shhhh~ shhhh~~~~ go to bed" he was cradling you like a baby, stroking your hair and whispering in your ear. (creepy much?) "ok...just 5 more minutes ok childe?" yeaaa... 5 minutes my ass. it was an hour until childe's alarm finally got him up. and while it was good that you were his secretary because you knew you couldn't get fired. but that meeting had a lot of information that was vital for the fatui's success. well! "y.n~~" he placed soft kisses on your face "good morning~!" "childe... what time is it." you knew you'd overslept, you felt like it was a weekend. "childe." "it's 8.00 AM..." "AJAX!" you flew out of bed, listening to childe's laughs and giggles "GOD FUCKING DAMNIT, YOU FIX YOUR OWN BREAKFAST." going to your closet throwing basically everything out, and put on the collared shirt and pants, then grabbing the tie from the rack. throwing off your pajamas right into cihlde's face so you could avoid being even later with his remarks. then throwing on your dress shirt and jumping into your pants. "need help with your tie?" he was now sitting up in bed, signaling you to come over. "pull me into bed one more time ajax, and i will burn all of your files." "wouldn't dare." he hummed tieing your tie while having a happy grin on his face. then he pulled you by the newly tied tie and placed a kiss on your cheek. "i love you y.n." "yea yea!" you pulled away from him and rushed to the bathroom to fix your hair. hearing childes whines in the background. luckily he was all ready to go to work by the time you got out of the bathroom, looking composed, ready, and professional. but childe...well "you're going to work with bed head?" you motioned to his head. flaming ginger locks flying everywhere "i understand why scaramouche makes fun of you. i would too." "yea but you still love me sooo~" slipping on your shoes, you opened the door for childe to leave... with his hair everywhere. lovely. at least you made it to work at all. waking up in the same bed as childe was war to get up.

AYATO

he wakes up first

it's creepy

and then he'll force you to get up with him, causing some minor fights in the mornings

he'd kill you if you made him miss a meeting

god forbid you to muddy his reputation

but you guys always have breakfast together, you might still be mad from him interrupting your slumber, but you'll get over it (hopefully) "y.n, we have a meeting at 9 sharp." ayato tried to wake you up, but you've been refusing for the past 30 minutes, refusing to get up or letting him go for that matter. you had him trapped in your arms, yes he could break through your arms but he needed to make sure you could get up and stay awake, key word, stay. so the best way to ensure that was to make you wake up with him. "ayato can't we just skip this meeting?" you tossed and turned, digging yourself more into the covers, letting go of ayato "here you go and then you can tell me *yawn* all about it?" "no y.n, get up." ayato made his way out of bed and tore off the covers, leaving you to toss and turn and then groan "this meeting is very important, i trust you'll be able to get up now." he tossed the heap of covers to the corner of your shared bedroom "mhmm." you turned one more time, then sat up showing ayato that you were, in fact, awake, hair a mess. then once you heard the door shut, you flopped back down and went back to sleep, slightly colder. there was no way he could be that mad at you. he was your husband after all! no, he was pissed, very, very pissed "Y.N KAMISATO." you heard the door opening, you had just now gotten up and your husband was booming into your guys' room like a race car. your head crooked like a deer in headlights. "..yes?" yea, he was pissed "how many times did i ask you to get up?" but got he was so hot being pissed "a few? but ayato i said you could just tell me what happens-" "yes, but that's not the same as being there y.n. you do realize that, right? and imagine the embarrassment of telling everyone you couldn't make it, to a 9 o'clock meeting since you slept in?" yea no he was hot mad, definitely "i'll do all my paperwork and turn it in! i'll review the finances! i'll do everything to make it better, okay?" "those are things you've agreed to since I married you." ayato deadpanned at you. usually, agreeing to do your work would make him happier, but he wasn't having any of it. "then... ill get up with you can clean with thoma!!" YES! this was the best idea- "no, we've hired thoma and maids for that very job y.n. just come to breakfast ok?" well, you were right. he wasn't that mad at you after all. and with a kiss on your cheek, you were brought out to enjoy breakfast with the hot and sticky inazuma air, something you also hated.

DILUC

very strict about when he wakes up and goes to sleep 100%

and that also applies to you

he's the kind of guy to like open the blinds first thing in the morning

but on weekends he will just sleep in with you in his arms

so when you won't get up in the mornings, issues... arise "Y.N" diluc busted through the door of the shared bedroom "Y.N L.N." you slowly woke up, but diluc was at your side, shaking you awake. "huh- what? what? are you ok?" you thought someone hurt him, or something had happened in mondstat. but no, you had just woken up late for an important meeting with one of the economical groups in mondstat. "Y.N THE- THE COMPANY GOING TO MEET WITH ANGELS SHARE, GET DRESSED!" he threw clothes at you as you rubbed your sleepy eyes. "diluc..that's your company. that's all your issue" you dug yourself deep in the sheets and tried to fall asleep again "y.n if you don't get out of that bed im going to toss all the sheets off and force you to get up and get ready." "do it, i dare you." that was his final straw, he loved you very much. but that love came to a point. and he really did it, he ripped off the sheets and you curled your body up more. "FUCK!" you flew out strings of curses and groaning. "y.n, get up." he was planning something in his head, something very mean and cruel. he grabbed your ankle and unfolded your fetal position, you kicked and whined. you were already awake, but getting ready was just too much. "diluccc can you put my socks on?" you were just spread out on the bed without sheets, holding up a foot and moving it left to right. "y.n..." he went to the closet and grabbed a pair of socks and put them on you as you smiled at your husband. god, he was so cute. "how about you hand me my fancy clothes you tossed off with the sheets?" you stilled lied there, knowing he would do anything for you guys to be on time "fine y.n." he reached down with a groan and threw your clothes on you for a second time that morning "now get changed." you walked out of the bedroom room, throwing your hands up and twirling, showing off the outfit. "see diluc, i can get ready in time for your meetings!" you smiled at his deadpanned face "fine, i'm sorry for making your morning difficult. i didn't mean to and i won't do it again.." he got out from the chair, placing the newspaper down and engulfed you into a large hug. "i love you y.n." "i love you too diluc." he kissed your forehead as your guys headed out, the maids fangirling over your relationship. diluc could be cute sometimes.

PENIS!!!!

WHAT ANW ANSWER MY IG DM YOU ASS

Wings Of Freedom

Ft. Venti x Gn!Florist reader

Cw : Hurt/No comfort, some grammar error i think? Ooc venti maybe, I HATE WRITING RAAAGH, english is not my mothertounge so sorry if some of the word are amiss.

Summary : You've always dreamed to be a florist, tending and caring a flower is what you've always liked to do. Even after you opened up your little flower shop it always has an upside downs, Customer comes and go but not until a certain green bard came abruptly to your life.

☆–—–—–—–—☆ ☆–—–—–—–—☆

☆–—–—–—–—☆ ☆–—–—–—–—☆

Having to tend a little flower shop by yourself isn't always the easiest, picking up flower on starsnatch cliff by midnight and feeling the strong wind of mondstadt creeps up to your bone and then planting a seed of mondstadt native flower which grows into a beautiful flower then wilts the next day or either the pot falling from the balcony of a small rented house you're living in, then having to deal with rude customer.

Then again you remembered, this is the life you've always wanted.

Since little, You have always happily helped your parents with their little generational bakery. Either you were running around and delivering the freshly made bread to person that ordered it then getting a lot of compliment about how enthusiastic you are, it has always been the happiest day of your life. You wished that you could stay on that timeline of your life forever.

Sadly, one day. Your parents generational bakery comes to its end, as much as you can remember somebody blacklisted your parents bussines and making the bakery to be put out of business.

The day after it happened, it was a total chaos your parents were running here and there looking for a job vacancy to apply in. Your father said that he himself got a high paying job on snezhnaya and said that the job he applied in is pretty much dangerous and he had to move out of mondstadt to Snezhnaya leaving you and your own mother behind.

That night, he left you and your mother alone and left a letter saying..

"My dear beautiful wife, and my beloved child today is the last night i could see you with my own eyes. Worry not my dear family if the day ever comes that i wasnt in your arms remember that, i'll soar the sky and be with you as the wind of mondstadt. So fret not my dearest family."

You remembered how loud your mother cry were, after all when your father left your mother was very ill, You tried to use every allowances your parents gave you to look if theres a doctor who could treat her illnes, but your mother said...

"(Name) this sickness is uncureable, no matter if you search at the most smartest doctor. They cannot cure this generational illness, my own mother your grandma has this sickness too. Unfortunately she said that this illness has been going on our family tree since the first generation to our own. (Name).. im very scared if you caught this illness too, what if i was not there to tend to you? How would you survive by yourself?..." she holded your hand tightly while a little drop of tears falls down through her cheek.

Her word echoes through your ears frequently, even after her passing you could remember how her tone were laced in fear.

Mother... mother i miss you so much..

You doesn't even realize how your eyes water to the bitter memories when your mother passed away.

You tried to remember correctly about the symptoms your mother had when she was sick, first... she was pale.. and weak and then sometimes she.. coughed up blood wait why were you trying to remember the symptoms?? Perhaps, you were scared.

What if you caught the same illness your grandmother and your mother was? After all if you look at yourself correctly at the mirror you could see that your body were showing the same symptoms your mother had.

You turned your head to the dark sky of mondstadt, right.. its time to pick some cecilia

you got out of your so beloved bed you could feel the cold of the wooden floor hitting your bare feet, Maybe Midnight its a bad time to go pick out some cecilia, but deep down you know that you wanted to feel the mondstadt air and ease your mind for a little while.

You took one of your basket that you usually use to gather neither herb or flower and walked yourself up to the starsnatch cliff.

The midnight air was cold yet comforting, with every step you took you couldn't help but reminsice the old days when your beloved mother would take you to a night stroll on the starsnatch mountain. Often she tells you that sometimes a bard would play his lyre and sing a beautiful melody of a mondstadt poem. Said she that she would often gave up the idea of picking out the flower and admire the bard melody instead.

You wondered, was his melody really that good? So that your mother who has always hated bard fell in love with his melody. She even said that bard shouldn't sang their tune and stops being drunk.

Was he and his melody really that majestic?...

Indeed you were lost in your thought, until something or someone snapped your thought the more closer you walked the clearer the source was, its a... melody?.. was it the bard your mother tells you, From afar you could see a certain green bard sitting on the edge of the cliff and sang a certain melody.

What is he doing? On the middle night like this, does he not know the mondstadt air is too cold these day? And i was trying to enjoy my time picking out flower alone too. –You grumble down to yourself

The more you got closer to the cliff the more you could hear his melody, honestly his melody was beautiful. You were struck admiring him and his melody not caring about how the cold air is hitting you to the bone.

"Hoho~ is someone admiring the bard and his tune?" The green bard stopped playing and turned his head at you, "Was my melody beautiful that it made you stop your track and listen to it?" His feet dangling on the edge of the cliff.

"Ahem! Of course no, i was uhh here to pick out some flower see??" You bend yourself down to pluck some cecilia

"Lying is bad you know? But i'll let you do whatever your doing" said he as he continues to strum his lyre down and sang an old mondstadt song

What a weird bard –You muttered down to yourself

"Anyway Since this is midnight, what kind of a bard would see himself at the cliff while singing some mondstadt song or poem and not singing drunk at the angel share?" Again you said while picking up a batch of fresh flower while occasionally shivering from the cold air.

"Well, singing here made me remember some of the beautiful moments i shared with my late friend ehe, and honestly stranger seeing you here reminds me of a certain person, Hm.. which person was it eh?~" Said the bard with a cheeky tone, "Ah! I remember, it was that woman that would often came here to pick out some flower! Just like you." He got up from the cliff and walked towards you, "Though picking out flower at midnight isnt good is it? You should go home soon."

Damn.. who is he to tell me to do something?...

"Of course stranger, i will go home after i finished, and i diddnt quite catch your name, whats your name?"

"Im Venti the number one bard in the wholee teyvat! And what's your name stranger?" His aqua green eyes met yours

"Im... (Name) its a pleasure to meet you."

"No need to be so formal (Name), I'll be going now. See you somewhere!" He waves his hand at you while walking down the mountain.

Hmm, his name sound quite familiar i wonder –You continued picking out the flower, Today flower is so fresh~

After you finished on picking out the flower for tommorow sell, you descended your way down the mountain, again feeling the cold air of mondstadt hits your bone. Though seeing that bard makes you wonder if he is really the bard that your dearest mother mentioned, his melody were really beautiful.

After a little journey down the starsnatch cliff to your little rented apartement you set down the filled bucket with flower in it down and started to plant them down one by one on a little pot you got from flora.

Today flower is really fresh, im sure flora would like it~ —you muttered down to yourself

Though you wonder how you ended up being a florist, when all you dreamed was to be an adventurer, just like your father.

Your father had an pyro vision that light up brightly just like his own heart, said he when he got it, he felt disappointment arose on his heart. When he wanted an Anemo vision, so why does the god grants him an pyro one instead?

That pyro vision often burned his hand, you remember one time your mother dared him to cook by himself since apparently he made mother mad and ended up (almost) burning the whole kitchen and made your mother even more mad.

But, Again when you rethink of what your father said when he was disappointed of getting an pyro vision instead of anemo, you wanted to be mad you really do. Even after numerous of pray you did to the gods to grant you a vision, you never got one. Imagine how fun is it to have vision with you?

Like maybe cooking is easier when you have a pyro vision with you, or maybe the Anemo one! You could clean the leaves near your home by swooshing the wind.

Tsk, why was that old man so ungrateful. —you grumbled while aggresively patting your hand to get the dirt off.

You plopped yourself down to the bed and made yourself comfortable.

I hope tommorow is better.

The next morning came pretty quick, the ray of sunlight seeping from the curtain stirs you awake. The first thing that came in your mind is.. work.

Flora must been waiting, better hurry..

After you've done your usual morning routine, you picks up 2 pot of cecilia and walks outside your home, as usual you being you still being popular despite the incident that occured on your family.

You walked and walked to the mondstadt gates while occasionally saying hello to the people outside.

"Flora! I brought the flowers from last night, they looked really fresh today." You squatted and puts down the flower pot arranging it under flora's table

"When did you picked this up?" Flora asked

"As usual you know, on midnight. Though the wind was really freezing me up last night!"

"(Name)! I told you to stop picking up flower at midnight, who know a monster might get you or maybe the wind will freeze you!" She kneeled beside you, "Im worried about you (Name), dont push yourself, your sickness Its– " she paused, her eyes showing worries.

"You shouldn't be worrying me too much flora! I can take care of myself, im very strong no monster and wind could make me succumb to my own knees." You got up and offered your hand to her, "Now cmon! The work is waiting."

"Alright alright! Just dont overdo yourself." Said flora as she takes your hand and got up to her foot.

◇—◇

As time went by, the sun has set down. Leaving you and flora alone, Time to pack everything– you muttered to yourself but you noticed that, a certain bard has been watching you from afar. Though you paid no mind since ur eyes is starting to give up on staying awake.

"Aaaa im too tired, why does these weeks seems so tiring to me flora?.." you stretched your back while whining a little, "I gotta go rest.."

"Yea, you definitely should (name). Plus you gotta go check that illness of yours, its been a while since you paid a visit to that doctor." Flora turned her eyes to you whilst organizing the flower pot in front of the stall, "now go home (name), leave the rest to me!"

"Alright.. thanks flora, you too dont go home too late." Said you as you packed your things and walked yourself home.

The walk to your home wasnt that far since the place your staying in is near flora's flower stall, when you arrive at your doorstep again you realize that someone gaze has been eyeing you since you walked yourself home.

Eerie... –was all you could thought

The moment you entered your house you feel that something is wrong, your head was spinning abruptly and your vision was blurry, your palm were sweating.

"Hey! You alright??"

You could hear someone voice? When you turned your heels to see who it was.

Oh.. its that green bard– was all you could mutter before collapsing into the floor and your vision darkened.

◇—◇

You do not remember how long you were gone, but what you remember is that when you woke up you could hear 2 person mumbling about something, what is happening?? –You asked yourself

You started to open your eyes little by little, while sometimes you squinted your eyes trying to adjust to the lights around you, when you started to observe your surrounding. You realized that you were laying in your bed.

You turned your head to see where the mumbling noise was, flora?..

"(Name)! Thanks the archons you're awake, this green bard was running to me saying that hey! Your friend collapsed! –to which i replied WHO?!" She said whilst removing the ice pack on your head.

"Ehe! Glad i've spotted you on time, sorry about breaking into your house though." Said the green bard which if you remember correctly, his name was Venti.

"Must've been whatever this sickness is.. right??" You turned your head to flora.

"Anyway, (Name) ill go get your food from my house alright? You stay put here with venti. Venti dont do anything weird to them, remember what our agreement is." Flora said while she got on her heels and walked herself through your home.

And now what left is just you and the bard whose his position right now is sitting on your bed, "So how do you feel (Name)?" He opened his mouth to speak.

"Do i know you?" You muttered

"Aww cmonn dont pretend we're not close! (Name) its not good that you're starting to forget your savior!" He said crossing his arms

My what?! I diddnt even known him for long!

"Okay okay i–" your own voice was interrupted by a fist of cough coming down from your own throat, that hurted..

"Take it easy (Name), just rest i'll watch you." The bard said, "Should i sing you a tune then, its free dont worry." He said summoning his lyre, as he started to strummed his lyre down you realized how familiar the melody was, it feels as if you were listening it for the second time ever.

When you looked at his face, your mind suddenly went nostalgic. He reminds you of a certain someone? But.. who?

"Do i.. know you?.." for the second time again you muttered to yourself, you tried to recollect any memories that involve this certain green bard but there was none

"Have i ever met you before that time on starsnatch cliff?" You blurted the word out of your mouth, to your surprise the bard choked on his own melody. Seeing how surprised and weird his look was you began to ponder even more.

"Ehh i wonder.. what do you think then (Name)? Was i that weird bard who you met on the starsnatch cliff last time?" His aqua green eyes meets yours.

To which you shrugged your own shoulder as a response, "i dont know... venti.."

"You dont have to remember its fine, anyway flora will be here soon with your medicine, maybe to pass the time should i tell you a story?"

You only nodded your head in response.

"At last there was a story—"

Where a bard met a mondstadter who piques his interest, their hobby of dancing and their hobby of baking intrigue him.

There comes a day when he started talking to them, to which on his own surprises! They share the same hobby as him... Which is Singing. Everyday they would be running around the town singing music, every night they would sat together on the startsnatch cliff and tells eachother funny stories.

The moon is beautiful today isn't it? They blurted out, in which the bard responses, I know.

But sadly there comes a day when the bard partner had accident, their family bussines went out of bussiness. The bard never knew what his partner was dealing with, until one night it all ended.

-☆-☆-

"Alright! Thats it, the another part of story can wait another time (Name), flora is here already." He said standing up from your own bed, "I'll get going if you want to know the continuation meet me at the starsnatch cliff Ehe! See you"

Again he waved his hand at you and left, somehow your heart aches when he left something felt amiss on your heart.

"Flora who is he?." You turned your head to face her.

"Not important (Name) go eat first alright" she said

Who.. is he? Why does he feel so familiar

This time you could only bottle the feeling down to yourself, even flora persist that she's not gonna give you an answer. Should i try asking the bard??..

-☆-☆-☆-

Ironic isnt it? Seeing your own lover started to gradually forgets you? Just because of your little mistake everything started to went downhill.

The only thing that brighten up your life, Gone. Even when you tried so hard to make them remember who you are, you failed.

Because of your own mistake, now you cant do what you used to do with them, holding hands, hugging, laughing with each other, and maybe even being affectionate with each other.

Merely, they were nothing but a stranger to you now, all because of your own mistake.

It was your own mistake Venti, if only at that time you were quick enough they wouldn't forget you.

-☆-☆-☆-

Ty for reading whatever this shitty ahh post, gn im gonna go sleep ty.

Ya'all better support this bitchass if not im gonna combust <333

YOU BEING DRUNK FEAT: childe, zhongli, diluc

CHILDE

childe had just gotten back from a longgg work trip

and what'd know! he brought back some expensive ass wine, and you thought you'd treat yourself to some

well one glass turned into two, then four, and here you are seven glasses in and you weren't doing so good

ontop of that wine, you had also been enjoying a few shots of firewater that childe brought back from his visit home

so the surprise on childe's face when he walks in and finds you draped over the coffee table with the whole bottle of wine in hand, he can connect the dots

probably laugh at you

when you're slurring your words, he'll mock you and do the cheek-pulling thing "i have the groceries!" childe had just gotten home after his late-night trip to the grocery store in order to pick up a few things for tomorrow's breakfast. "oh!" he stood in the kitchen noticing the empty firewater container and the wine bottle in your hand, and he couldn't hold it in anymore and just fucking starts giggling and cackling. "what have you gotten into dear y.n!" he drops off the brown bag he was carrying in his hand to come to your aid, but instead of words you let out lazy mumbles and sniffles. "ill get a cold rag, stay here" just as he was getting up, he heard the start of more sniffling that turned into you bawling your eyes out. "do--on't leaVe" your voice was cracking and you were sniffling in between words, but he still understood you. in fact, he thought it was quite cute when you were drunk and just let your mouth have no filter(in private ofc). "im here y.n, im here" you simply just laid in his arms drooling on him as you passed out by his legs. childe may or may not have taken a few pictures with his camera, he'll show you in the morning. he soon moved you to your bed, where you awoke the next morning with the worst headache and hangover sickness. you could only recall half of what happened last night, but you knew once childe heard you stirring awake, he'd come and tease you about it, and you were right. "i never knew you were so clingy!" he said as you both sat at the table, you eating cereal with messy hair and dark under eyes. "you know you should get drunk more often!" you weren't in the mood for his teasing and laughing so early in the morning, so you simply just shot him a glare and he smiled as he talked about his work trip and just how happy he was to be home.

ZHONGLI

he'd honestly probably lecture you the morning after

he just wants to keep you safe (maybe idk)

but, he knows just how to take care of you, and makes sure that the hangover the next morning won't be that bad

still kind of annoyed at you though

but it was ventis birthday today, and wherever venti was, alcohol was

so you and zhongli showed up to celebrate of course!

and no surprise, you got drunk, so now zhongli has to drag you back home and take care of you. he noticed how you started acting loose as the night went on. being flushed, clumsy and touchy, a little too much for his tastes. so now, he just needed to get you home. "y.n, i think it's time we need to go." you were talking with kaeya, venti, and childe about memories from the past years, so not wanting to leave you tried to bargain with him "just 10 more minutes, kay?" cocktail in hand, you gave him a smile...yea you were drunk. "y.n, let's go you can call them in the morning." you let out an annoyed groan, not wanting to leave yet. "mr. zhongli! here, you can go home and ill drive y.n home in an hour! they'll be back twelve sharp sir!" it's not that zhongli didn't trust you, there was just a dangerous aspect seeing how 3/4 of the people here were already drunk out of there minds. and all the people who'd be willing to take you home were drunk. "thanks for the offer ajax, but i think y.n needs to head home. they have work in the morning." did you? nope. but zhongli thought as long as you're drunk, you'd believe him. and what'd you know! he was right. "well, i can call in sick rightttt" you were now leaning on zhongli, arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, trying to persuade him into letting one of your friends drive you home. "and plus! it's venti's birthday, one day wouldn't hurt liii" the nickname caught him by surprise, but he wasn't letting you off that easy. "i hope you know i'm not above dragging you out of here y.n." you frowned and turned to venti, giving him the cocktail you'd been holding. "bye guys..." you frowned intensely hoping zhongli would see that and let you stay, nope. you guys got in the car and you just started fuck bawling your eyes out. "AUHUHUHUH *sniff* UHUHAHU" you were throwing a whole fit in the passenger set of your boyfriend's car "YOU'RE SO MEANN AUHUHAHA" kicking and screaming just like a child, it was funny to zhongli causing him to smirk a bit. the fit kept on until you guys were halfway home, and when zhongli pulled into the driveway, you were fast asleep (or passed out) on your own lap. folded over. he wonder how you could sleep like that. but regardless he carried you into the bed and took off your shoes, and clothes, and placed you into your pajamas. then just tucked you in. he enjoyed moments where he could find the time to just take care of you, even if it meant having to lecture you in the morning about throwing fits and getting drunk on a tuesday night, but that could wait. instead, he got a rag and cooled down your flushed face, then left a glass of water for you to drink. "fuck...." you woke up, hair in an absolute mess, nose stuffy, and fucking thirsty. and zhongli heard you as you stirred awake and came to your aid. "this is what happens when you get drunk." he opened the bottle of nausea medicine on his bedside table and gave you one. you were very lucky to have him. "you know, getting drunk can lead to multiple brain....." he started to lecture you, it'd become his habit.

DILUC

he's had to deal with multiple drunk clients, so naturally, he's veryy good at it

but still gets kind of annoyed with you for doing it, like bro wtf?

and you did it, right in front of him too. in his own tavern. in public

well lets just say you and kaeya got into a drinking game, diluc knew you had some self-control, but that self-control gets washed away with kaeya.

and he was right

you guys are about to pass you, burping and nauseated but still pushing the limits.

diluc didn't even take a good look at you until now.

your face is basically tomato red and laughing along with kaeya

he blames the whole thing on kaeya "one more round pleaseeeee" you say, laughing right afterward with kaeya. diluc turns to face you, and let's just say he's not the happiest. "..kaeya leave." kaeya laughs it off, then grabs your arm to continue your drinking game somewhere else. well, that was until diluc intervened. grabbing your other arm "y.n, you're staying here until i'm done. i'll talk with you later." you turned to kaeya for help with the now very angry diluc. and kaeya was no help, just waving you off as he left in search of a new tavern to push the limits. "eat these." he pushed crackers your way and kept on dealing with knights and what-not around the tavern. you were surprised venti wasn't there that night. if so then you'd be able to have a free way of stealing wine from behind the counter. you started on the crackers thinking of a way to get more beer or wine from diluc without him noticing. but, why not just ask him! he loves you after all! "dilllucccc" you said, head laying in your arms "yes y.n?" he wasn't facing you due to him serving another customer, but he still heard you nonetheless "one more *hic* wine please!" waving your hand side to side lazily so he would pay attention "y.n, you've had enough already. you're turning into that green bastard poet." he waved you off, cleaning glasses while taking orders. "bUT-" and here the waterworks go, yea... "you said-!" "y.n.... here, have some water." he handed you a cup which you just stared in the water with your tears mixing in with the water. "ill close the tavern early and we can get home, ok?" "ok!" and back to your perky self, bipolar much?

this shit rough af, but im to lazy to fix it soo👍👍 pocket lent if u guess what my old blog was💖

Warnings: Profanity, angst.

“Again, does anybody have a lighter?” Price asked a little louder this time.

Soap gently elbowed Ghost on the side. Ghost only turned to look at him, tilting his head a little to show his annoyance.

They were almost in the middle of nowhere. At least they had electricity and water. What they did not have was a lighter, thus Price’s moaning. He was going to light up a cigar.

Ghost knew why Soap was elbowing him. Soap was referring to that lighter in Ghost’s pocket. The one he held personally for himself and himself only.

So, Ghost ignored the sergeant. Price had arrived in front of them by then.

“Simon, you smoke,” Price brought up.

“I don’t have a lighter,” Ghost said.

“You pray with it every night,” Soap muttered.

Price and Ghost looked at him. Ghost was practically glaring at Soap. Soap looked like he wished he had not said a word.

“Am I missing something?” Price asked.

Ghost said nothing and now Price was also looking at Soap rather intimidatingly.

“I… Ghost has a lighter,” Soap said.

“I don’t,” Ghost insisted.

Price now turned his expecting glare at Ghost. That got Soap a little confident to proceed.

“As I said, he basically prayed with it every night before he sleeps,” Soap continued.

“Just this once, Simon, I will lose my shit if I can’t get this cigar lit up,” Price said.

Ghost did not react at first, but seeing that the two of them were not going to let this go, he shot a final murderous glare at Soap before putting his hand into his pocket. He held the lighter in his palm and pulled it out of his pocket. 

Looking at the captain, Ghost almost did not want to hand out the lighter. However, he ended up opening his palm and revealed the lighter that sat on his palm.

It was as if the whole area turned frozen. Gaz had just walked in and saw the reveal. Even he stopped at his track.

The lighter was yours. It used to be yours. It did belong to you. It did not belong to you anymore. It belonged to Ghost now. You gave it to him before your last mission. The mission that got you killed.

Every thing was fine before that—no, every thing was perfect.

Ghost and you were basically a nightmare couple. A nightmare as in badass motherfuckers who got shit done effectively. Sure, there were flaws such as the constant passive-agressive flirting, recklessness, and tense eye contacts, but, damn… the two of you were great at your job together.

That last mission was indeed going to be your last mission because you decided to not renew your military contract and you both were about to get married. Without telling anyone. However, the others just knew. They always knew that the two of you would end up together one way or another.

Then, shit happened. The worst happened. The irony.

You ended up buried under the ground and became a memory. Ghost ended up here, with these three, more bitter than he ever was.

You always had his heart and it was buried with you. Whatever sentimental left in him, it was out of respect of the memory of you. Of the memory you both were about to make and never did.

Price, Gaz, and Soap never brought you up. Not since the funeral. Price tried and Ghost ended up walking out of the room without saying anything, slamming the door on his way out.

This would be the first time anything about you ever came up ever since that incident. Soap had no idea it was the lighter. Ever. So, his heart did not only stop when he saw it, it would blow up if it could. Gaz used to borrow the lighter to do tricks, so he would recognise it from afar. Price had his cigars lit up by the lighter a few times before.

The four of them were frozen there for quite some time.

“So, we don’t have a lighter,” Price concluded before anyone of them started bursting into either anger or tears.

“Yeah, we don’t,” Soap nodded. “Steamin’ Jesus.”

“You know, there’s a stove in the kitchen. You can light your cigar up with it,” Gaz brought up. “I’m about to cook something, too.”

“Right, right,” Price nodded before walking away.

“I’ll help make sure no one’s burning anything down and get us compromised,” Soap stated before leaving the area.

Ghost stayed where he stood a while after they left. He stared at the lighter for some time, thinking about what you might say if you were still here. None of them would be this messy. The four of them would likely be laughing right now of some stupid joke you made.

Maybe you were still here. He might be the Ghost, but you were the ghost now. Maybe you were laughing at them right now.

“Would’ve been nice if you’re here,” Ghost said under his breath before pocketing the lighter back.

Follow @linzi-yay As fast as light ^^

“Tea Leaf”

Last sentence changed from  “ Am I supposed to give you a lick as thanks?”

don't you realize our bodies could fall apart any second?

141 x male!reader

⚠︎ REPOST FROM PREVIOUS BLOG ⚠︎

warnings: gore, cod typical violence, foul language, kinda angst-y, could be read as either romantic or platonic, actually scratch that very angsty, death, alot of contemplating death, honestly mostly price centered lolz, its also like basically the convoy chase scene so yeah

notes: ⚠︎ this was a request from my previous account!! so uh 🪷 if u see this then here :3 ⚠︎ tsym for requesting !! this was crazy fun to write and i was really excited to work on it!! i had to fudge around some details for it to make a little more sense logistically speaking -- also sorry for taking a long ass while to get it done, but i hope you like regardless :)

(and yeah 🪷 is fine lol)

The horizon of the young night, painted in soft, deep blues, and splattered with stars like the flick of a paint brush, almost completely takes you out of your head. You don't often get the chance to enjoy the beauty around you, and even as you do in this moment, there's shouting and gunfire ringing in the background. Even the heavy pitter patter of rain can't deafen. It was ironic in a way--  you could probably find a cliche metaphor in there somewhere.

The huff of the helicopters rapid blades muffle what you can hear, even with your headset securely cuffed around your ears. The relentless wind beats against your skin, grabbing and pulling at your hair ferociously.

Even after all this time, these missions never fail to get your nerves up.

You feel your heart pound against your chest as Captain Price, in the seat besides the pilot, continues to bark out orders and directions. Pursing your lips, you bring your guns scope back to your eye, grip so tight you might've thought you've left your fingerprints indented into the plastic. You're squatted down on the helicopters floor, leaned against the wall as you use it for cover. Your bullets fly from the open door, aimed for the hostile vehicles set on evading your team.

Sergeant Kyle Garrick, or rather Gaz, mirrors your position on the adjacent side of the door-- Soap and Ghost no doubt holding similar positions behind you.

It's almost looking like this whole thing might go your way.

"Gaz-- [L/N]!" Price calls out over coms. "Anti-Air teams locking onto us-- your side!"

Your aim almost instinctively finds them-- large red lasers all seeming to be pointing directly at you. You squeeze your finger against the trigger, a cold sweat washing over you as you realize your bullets are doing nothing to their body armor. You felt the rhythmic jolt of your gun in your arms-- realizing you were swiftly running out of time, you called by to price, finger never leaving the trigger. "Captain-- They're wearing armor, we can't---!"

"INCOMING!" The frantic shout from Gaz cuts you off, eyes widening as you attempt to shield yourself from the missile blazing towards you. 

Your breath hitches as the heli begins to shake and spin-- you move from the door, pressing your back against the wall, madly grabbing onto whatever you can.

The pilots voice sounds in your ear, her voice strong, yet clearly frenzied. "We're going down, Y'all-- I need to execute an emergency lan-" Another large boom cuts her off, sending the heli plummeting to the ground, violent jerks being an attempt from the pilot to keep you from being obliterated the moment you'd make impact with the ground.

You try to maneuver to a more secure position as the heli grows unstable, but feel as the ground slips from under you, your back crashing again the floor with a heavy thump, head bouncing roughly against it.

Smoke fills the air, and your lungs, as alarms blare from the helis systems. There's a frantic cacophony of shouts as you fumble for anything to hold onto, nails screeching against metal as you claw to keep yourself alive. You feel your body lose to gravity as you begin to slip out, your gun now long gone.

your body dangles outside the heli, as chaos ensues. Your breath is rapid as you're just almost able to lift yourself back into 'safety.' but the rain has made everything slick and unstable. Your grip, your clothes, the metal.

Another hit to the tail end sends the helicopter to the point of no return. Plummeting downwards at seemingly impossible speeds-- in just a few seconds the chopper dove nose first into the ground, the screeching of metal aching on before coming to a silent hault.

The wreckage is still-- silent for a moment.

A sore groan stumbles from Prices throat as he forces his eyes open, a dull pain spreading through his body. On instinct, his hand goes to reach for the pilot, still sitting besides him. He stops as his eyes reach her-- her eyes wide open, empty, a strange glassy eyed stare bore into him. Broken glass litters her deep completion, the hair that had escaped her once neat bun lay stuck to her forehead as sweat and blood coats her flesh.

His chest tightness as he looks past her, into the cabin. After a moment of deadly silence, as if he were scared to ask, he finds his voice. "Are you-" a cough cuts him off, he almost instinctively turns away as he continues to hack through his sentence. "Are you alright!?"

He's partially relieved when a slew of groans answers him. Turning back, ignoring the stare of the pilot, he tries for an exit from the windshield, having been shattered upon impact. As he climbs from the cockpit, he hopes his voice is still loud enough for his team to hear. "Gaz?"

His head snaps as a figure emerges from the wreckage, pushing heavy scraps of metal from its way, and stumbling out from what remained of cabins open door. "'m alright..." He groans out in a hushed whisper, blood coating his forehead. It seems Gaz is still trying to process what's happened.

"Soap?"

As if on cue, Soap follows in Gaz's steps, footing unstable as he attempts to climb out. A string of barely legible curses are spat from his mouth before finally answering with an "I'm fine." The mostly agitated sort of growl sounded like it'd hurt his throat.

Soap extends a hand into the wreckage, a skeleton clad glove reaching for it, gripping it with a grunt as Soap pulls him up.

"Ghost, you alright mate?"

"Not dead yet." Is all he responds, stumbling from the rubble. 

"[L/N]?"

Again, everything's still.

Rain pounds against his head, soaking his hair. He must've lost his hat somewhere in the wreckage.

"[L/N]!" He calls again, straining to listen for your reply. He hisses out a curse as he moves to the demolished, Ghosts voice stopping him mere seconds later.

"Price." He says it like a whisper, not even turning to look at his Captain. Its like he's frozen in panic.

Price turns, his gaze following ghosts a few feet from the crash. barely visible through the rain is a still body.

Your body.

Price doesn't register the fact that he's moving, his feet almost slipping against the mud, till he practically falls to his knees, the momentum of his movement pushing him into your body when he comes in close. His hands hover over your form, fearful his touch might shatter you.

You're on your side, limp as Price continues to mindlessly call your name, as if pleading with you to just hop up, pretending like the crash was just a scrape to your knee. "No, no, nonono- [Y/N]-!"

He rolls you onto your back eyes shooting to a large shard-like piece of metal stabbed into your side. Smaller pieces of shrapnel have torn into your clothes and buried themselves under your skin. His hope begins to falter just before you force out a breath, face twitching on discomfort as you shakily come to. You force your eyes open, meeting the fear-stricken frown of your captain.

Price lets out a breath of relief, putting on a smile to mask his panic. It doesn't work well.

You know something's wrong.

Scoffing at his almost fatherly attempt at comfort, you crack a smile, speaking through a sickly, dry throat. "Now be for real with me, old man; just how bad is it?" He's looking at you like you're a dog about to be put down.

He doesn't answer you.

Heavy boots bound towards you, snapping Price from his poorly concealed panic. His head snapps towards the rest of the team-- but he doesn't have to say a word. They're already doing what they have to.

You hear a certain sort of zip of fabric before you feel Ghosts unmistakeable warm hands pressed against you. You're covered in rain, dirt, and your own blood.

Price is still knelt by your head, trying to keep your attention on him-- trying to keep you talking, to keep you conscious. So it's that bad, huh?

"Kid, can you feel anything?"

You ponder the question, a strange happenstance that you don't know quite how to answer that question. "I feel..." You notice the gush of warmth flow out of your body, and a pulsing dullness. Nothing else. As you breath in to answer, you feel more blood gush from you. "Warm. It's kinda gross, actually." You went to laugh, but your chuckle is caught in your throat. You feel a strange sort of painful stabbing sensation in your legs-- like pins and needles amped up to a hundred. You don't say anything, just silently wince.

Price wordless stands, shouting into his walkie-talkie, as you look to Ghost. You don't dare look at the damage you've been dealt, just barely catching a glimpse of his scarf pressed against your skin, your red staining the once tan fabric.

You snap your eyes up, attempting to focus on the breath you're swiftly loosing. Your breathing grows shallow, despite your efforts to swallow back more air-- it's as if your lungs are simply refusing to work. Your chest aches as you fight for deeper breaths, as if your a fish fighting to survive above the water-- breathing a painful chore.

You try to move, to put a hand around your throat to sooth yourself, but your limbs all feel numb-- heavy, yet jelly-like all the same. It's as if some invisible force is holding you down.

your hearing begins to distort-- almost sounding like your head was plunged underwater, all voices and sounds fading beyond much of your understanding. You recognize Prices voice, shouting into his coms. His words echo three or four times, yet to you it's devoid of any substance or meaning.

Your vision blurs-- maybe it's the rain getting in your eyes, or maybe you're really just dying. You scowl at the cliche you're living through. At the very least, you now know all those books and movies held some truth to them.

he pain worsens as you try to speak to Ghost. "I swear to God, L.T, if I start rambling about seeing a bright light, just shoot me." Ghost doesn't find your attempt at humor very funny.

You're vision begins to go black, fading from the sides until only a fuzzy circle of your vision was left. For a moment you're struggling to figure out whether or not your eyes are closed.

Price continues to shout about medical evac, Gaz is at Ghosts sides, applying pressure to the multiple puncture wounds littering your abdomen as they try to work out a plan to move you to evac without potentially further harming you. Soap is at your side, his gloved hand protectively grabbing onto yours. You think he's talking to you, and you think you're answering, maybe offering him a joke or two to comfort his panic, but you can't be sure. This goes on for awhile, like you were stuck living the same minuet over and over again.

A ringing slowly floods your ears, and all at once your pain is eased. In the midst of such chaos around you, you find a quiet. A stillness. A sort of comforting peace washing over you.

The warmth of your blood is strangely curing. It reminds you of various memories from deep within your childhood-- lost instances of a tender embrace, being lulled to sleep in the arms of a loved one, dark and silent.

Death was an inevitable thought in your line of work. Honestly, the thought was probably the most consistent thing you had in your life. It was always pretty scary-- you didn't know when you'd die, how, what would come after-- frankly it scared you. But now, in the ease, there was a mysterious certainty in the cradle of death, you found yourself accepting the idea as if it were a gift you'd been waiting for.

"[Y/N]?" You've stopped answering Soap. Your instinct is to fight heft in your eyelids, but you're just so tired. As you begin to surrender to the peace, Soaps thick accent cuts through it. "No-- stay with me, [Y/N]!" He shifts his position, laying your head on his lap as his hands rest on your face, shaking your head to keep you awake.

His shout of protest gets Prices attention. Price approaches yet again and takes Soaps former place. He places a hand on your chest and shoulder, shaking you lightly. As he begins to speak, you roll your head towards him, barely making him out through the fuzz. "C'mon, stay with me, son." He sees that sort glassy glint in your eyes. "Don't close your eyes-- close your eyes and you're a goner. Jesus fuck--! Don't you fucking die on me-- that's an order!" His voice shakes despite himself.

You aren't afraid of death. You always thought you'd die slow and painful, but this was....Nice. There's no pain, no fear, nothing but numb. You struggle for a reason to not simply give into yourself-- maybe this was just your time. You're tired-- you're young, but so fucking tired. Why not let go? What are you holding on for?

Your head rolls to the other side. Ghost and Gaz's hands are coated in your blood, their clothes possibly forever stained with the memory of your life fleeting from under their palms. You can feel the warmth of Soaps lap from under your head, one hand lightly slapping your face, and the other combing back your hair with tender care. Weather its to sooth you, himself as a nervous tick, or to just keep your mud soaked hair from your face, it's still appreciated. Price has screamed his throat raw. You never thought you'd see the man falter, but you could feel his once strong hands seem to crumble again you as they gripped almost pathetically at your vest and shirt.

Suddenly you had your answer.

You draw a shallow breath.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Cap."

don't you realize our bodies could fall apart any second?

141 x male!reader

⚠︎ REPOST FROM PREVIOUS BLOG ⚠︎

warnings: gore, cod typical violence, foul language, kinda angst-y, could be read as either romantic or platonic, actually scratch that very angsty, death, alot of contemplating death, honestly mostly price centered lolz, its also like basically the convoy chase scene so yeah

notes: ⚠︎ this was a request from my previous account!! so uh 🪷 if u see this then here :3 ⚠︎ tsym for requesting !! this was crazy fun to write and i was really excited to work on it!! i had to fudge around some details for it to make a little more sense logistically speaking -- also sorry for taking a long ass while to get it done, but i hope you like regardless :)

(and yeah 🪷 is fine lol)

The horizon of the young night, painted in soft, deep blues, and splattered with stars like the flick of a paint brush, almost completely takes you out of your head. You don't often get the chance to enjoy the beauty around you, and even as you do in this moment, there's shouting and gunfire ringing in the background. Even the heavy pitter patter of rain can't deafen. It was ironic in a way--  you could probably find a cliche metaphor in there somewhere.

The huff of the helicopters rapid blades muffle what you can hear, even with your headset securely cuffed around your ears. The relentless wind beats against your skin, grabbing and pulling at your hair ferociously.

Even after all this time, these missions never fail to get your nerves up.

You feel your heart pound against your chest as Captain Price, in the seat besides the pilot, continues to bark out orders and directions. Pursing your lips, you bring your guns scope back to your eye, grip so tight you might've thought you've left your fingerprints indented into the plastic. You're squatted down on the helicopters floor, leaned against the wall as you use it for cover. Your bullets fly from the open door, aimed for the hostile vehicles set on evading your team.

Sergeant Kyle Garrick, or rather Gaz, mirrors your position on the adjacent side of the door-- Soap and Ghost no doubt holding similar positions behind you.

It's almost looking like this whole thing might go your way.

"Gaz-- [L/N]!" Price calls out over coms. "Anti-Air teams locking onto us-- your side!"

Your aim almost instinctively finds them-- large red lasers all seeming to be pointing directly at you. You squeeze your finger against the trigger, a cold sweat washing over you as you realize your bullets are doing nothing to their body armor. You felt the rhythmic jolt of your gun in your arms-- realizing you were swiftly running out of time, you called by to price, finger never leaving the trigger. "Captain-- They're wearing armor, we can't---!"

"INCOMING!" The frantic shout from Gaz cuts you off, eyes widening as you attempt to shield yourself from the missile blazing towards you. 

Your breath hitches as the heli begins to shake and spin-- you move from the door, pressing your back against the wall, madly grabbing onto whatever you can.

The pilots voice sounds in your ear, her voice strong, yet clearly frenzied. "We're going down, Y'all-- I need to execute an emergency lan-" Another large boom cuts her off, sending the heli plummeting to the ground, violent jerks being an attempt from the pilot to keep you from being obliterated the moment you'd make impact with the ground.

You try to maneuver to a more secure position as the heli grows unstable, but feel as the ground slips from under you, your back crashing again the floor with a heavy thump, head bouncing roughly against it.

Smoke fills the air, and your lungs, as alarms blare from the helis systems. There's a frantic cacophony of shouts as you fumble for anything to hold onto, nails screeching against metal as you claw to keep yourself alive. You feel your body lose to gravity as you begin to slip out, your gun now long gone.

your body dangles outside the heli, as chaos ensues. Your breath is rapid as you're just almost able to lift yourself back into 'safety.' but the rain has made everything slick and unstable. Your grip, your clothes, the metal.

Another hit to the tail end sends the helicopter to the point of no return. Plummeting downwards at seemingly impossible speeds-- in just a few seconds the chopper dove nose first into the ground, the screeching of metal aching on before coming to a silent hault.

The wreckage is still-- silent for a moment.

A sore groan stumbles from Prices throat as he forces his eyes open, a dull pain spreading through his body. On instinct, his hand goes to reach for the pilot, still sitting besides him. He stops as his eyes reach her-- her eyes wide open, empty, a strange glassy eyed stare bore into him. Broken glass litters her deep completion, the hair that had escaped her once neat bun lay stuck to her forehead as sweat and blood coats her flesh.

His chest tightness as he looks past her, into the cabin. After a moment of deadly silence, as if he were scared to ask, he finds his voice. "Are you-" a cough cuts him off, he almost instinctively turns away as he continues to hack through his sentence. "Are you alright!?"

He's partially relieved when a slew of groans answers him. Turning back, ignoring the stare of the pilot, he tries for an exit from the windshield, having been shattered upon impact. As he climbs from the cockpit, he hopes his voice is still loud enough for his team to hear. "Gaz?"

His head snaps as a figure emerges from the wreckage, pushing heavy scraps of metal from its way, and stumbling out from what remained of cabins open door. "'m alright..." He groans out in a hushed whisper, blood coating his forehead. It seems Gaz is still trying to process what's happened.

"Soap?"

As if on cue, Soap follows in Gaz's steps, footing unstable as he attempts to climb out. A string of barely legible curses are spat from his mouth before finally answering with an "I'm fine." The mostly agitated sort of growl sounded like it'd hurt his throat.

Soap extends a hand into the wreckage, a skeleton clad glove reaching for it, gripping it with a grunt as Soap pulls him up.

"Ghost, you alright mate?"

"Not dead yet." Is all he responds, stumbling from the rubble. 

"[L/N]?"

Again, everything's still.

Rain pounds against his head, soaking his hair. He must've lost his hat somewhere in the wreckage.

"[L/N]!" He calls again, straining to listen for your reply. He hisses out a curse as he moves to the demolished, Ghosts voice stopping him mere seconds later.

"Price." He says it like a whisper, not even turning to look at his Captain. Its like he's frozen in panic.

Price turns, his gaze following ghosts a few feet from the crash. barely visible through the rain is a still body.

Your body.

Price doesn't register the fact that he's moving, his feet almost slipping against the mud, till he practically falls to his knees, the momentum of his movement pushing him into your body when he comes in close. His hands hover over your form, fearful his touch might shatter you.

You're on your side, limp as Price continues to mindlessly call your name, as if pleading with you to just hop up, pretending like the crash was just a scrape to your knee. "No, no, nonono- [Y/N]-!"

He rolls you onto your back eyes shooting to a large shard-like piece of metal stabbed into your side. Smaller pieces of shrapnel have torn into your clothes and buried themselves under your skin. His hope begins to falter just before you force out a breath, face twitching on discomfort as you shakily come to. You force your eyes open, meeting the fear-stricken frown of your captain.

Price lets out a breath of relief, putting on a smile to mask his panic. It doesn't work well.

You know something's wrong.

Scoffing at his almost fatherly attempt at comfort, you crack a smile, speaking through a sickly, dry throat. "Now be for real with me, old man; just how bad is it?" He's looking at you like you're a dog about to be put down.

He doesn't answer you.

Heavy boots bound towards you, snapping Price from his poorly concealed panic. His head snapps towards the rest of the team-- but he doesn't have to say a word. They're already doing what they have to.

You hear a certain sort of zip of fabric before you feel Ghosts unmistakeable warm hands pressed against you. You're covered in rain, dirt, and your own blood.

Price is still knelt by your head, trying to keep your attention on him-- trying to keep you talking, to keep you conscious. So it's that bad, huh?

"Kid, can you feel anything?"

You ponder the question, a strange happenstance that you don't know quite how to answer that question. "I feel..." You notice the gush of warmth flow out of your body, and a pulsing dullness. Nothing else. As you breath in to answer, you feel more blood gush from you. "Warm. It's kinda gross, actually." You went to laugh, but your chuckle is caught in your throat. You feel a strange sort of painful stabbing sensation in your legs-- like pins and needles amped up to a hundred. You don't say anything, just silently wince.

Price wordless stands, shouting into his walkie-talkie, as you look to Ghost. You don't dare look at the damage you've been dealt, just barely catching a glimpse of his scarf pressed against your skin, your red staining the once tan fabric.

You snap your eyes up, attempting to focus on the breath you're swiftly loosing. Your breathing grows shallow, despite your efforts to swallow back more air-- it's as if your lungs are simply refusing to work. Your chest aches as you fight for deeper breaths, as if your a fish fighting to survive above the water-- breathing a painful chore.

You try to move, to put a hand around your throat to sooth yourself, but your limbs all feel numb-- heavy, yet jelly-like all the same. It's as if some invisible force is holding you down.

your hearing begins to distort-- almost sounding like your head was plunged underwater, all voices and sounds fading beyond much of your understanding. You recognize Prices voice, shouting into his coms. His words echo three or four times, yet to you it's devoid of any substance or meaning.

Your vision blurs-- maybe it's the rain getting in your eyes, or maybe you're really just dying. You scowl at the cliche you're living through. At the very least, you now know all those books and movies held some truth to them.

he pain worsens as you try to speak to Ghost. "I swear to God, L.T, if I start rambling about seeing a bright light, just shoot me." Ghost doesn't find your attempt at humor very funny.

You're vision begins to go black, fading from the sides until only a fuzzy circle of your vision was left. For a moment you're struggling to figure out whether or not your eyes are closed.

Price continues to shout about medical evac, Gaz is at Ghosts sides, applying pressure to the multiple puncture wounds littering your abdomen as they try to work out a plan to move you to evac without potentially further harming you. Soap is at your side, his gloved hand protectively grabbing onto yours. You think he's talking to you, and you think you're answering, maybe offering him a joke or two to comfort his panic, but you can't be sure. This goes on for awhile, like you were stuck living the same minuet over and over again.

A ringing slowly floods your ears, and all at once your pain is eased. In the midst of such chaos around you, you find a quiet. A stillness. A sort of comforting peace washing over you.

The warmth of your blood is strangely curing. It reminds you of various memories from deep within your childhood-- lost instances of a tender embrace, being lulled to sleep in the arms of a loved one, dark and silent.

Death was an inevitable thought in your line of work. Honestly, the thought was probably the most consistent thing you had in your life. It was always pretty scary-- you didn't know when you'd die, how, what would come after-- frankly it scared you. But now, in the ease, there was a mysterious certainty in the cradle of death, you found yourself accepting the idea as if it were a gift you'd been waiting for.

"[Y/N]?" You've stopped answering Soap. Your instinct is to fight heft in your eyelids, but you're just so tired. As you begin to surrender to the peace, Soaps thick accent cuts through it. "No-- stay with me, [Y/N]!" He shifts his position, laying your head on his lap as his hands rest on your face, shaking your head to keep you awake.

His shout of protest gets Prices attention. Price approaches yet again and takes Soaps former place. He places a hand on your chest and shoulder, shaking you lightly. As he begins to speak, you roll your head towards him, barely making him out through the fuzz. "C'mon, stay with me, son." He sees that sort glassy glint in your eyes. "Don't close your eyes-- close your eyes and you're a goner. Jesus fuck--! Don't you fucking die on me-- that's an order!" His voice shakes despite himself.

You aren't afraid of death. You always thought you'd die slow and painful, but this was....Nice. There's no pain, no fear, nothing but numb. You struggle for a reason to not simply give into yourself-- maybe this was just your time. You're tired-- you're young, but so fucking tired. Why not let go? What are you holding on for?

Your head rolls to the other side. Ghost and Gaz's hands are coated in your blood, their clothes possibly forever stained with the memory of your life fleeting from under their palms. You can feel the warmth of Soaps lap from under your head, one hand lightly slapping your face, and the other combing back your hair with tender care. Weather its to sooth you, himself as a nervous tick, or to just keep your mud soaked hair from your face, it's still appreciated. Price has screamed his throat raw. You never thought you'd see the man falter, but you could feel his once strong hands seem to crumble again you as they gripped almost pathetically at your vest and shirt.

Suddenly you had your answer.

You draw a shallow breath.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Cap."

K-On walked so that Bocchi could...

...so that Bocchi could do whatever the hell all this is

shounen ai mangas that should be a part of your reading list if you enjoy reading healthy and plot-driven romances- part 2.

this is a continuation to the first part of this list i made earlier this month, part 1

6. Until i meet my husband.

the reason why i want this manga to be a part of your reading list is simply because it changed my perspective on gay relationships as a person, there were so many things that i was never able to inculcate myself or things that where actually alienated to me, this manga is actually inspired by a memoir written by ryousuke nanazaki, who happens to be an activist and the manga revolves around his life growing up as somebody who identifies as a gay man and his life till he finally met his husband, i encourage you to give this manga a read and try to understand how gay relationships actually are and not the female gaze that always markets in the shounen ai industry.

7) Koimonogatari.

koimonogatari is alot more than a shounen ai manga, it's about self acceptance, friendship and internalized homophobia, there were multiple instances in the story where i had to sit back and cry and actually introspect for a minute by putting myself in the main character's shoes, if you actually want to experience an actual expression of accepting your identity, please give this manga a read.

8. Restart after come back home.

this story often makes me think about how home is actually a person, i honestly get so overwhelmed with the comfort this manga brings while reading it out, whether it is the art style or honestly the way the characters are written or perhaps it's the grumpy sunshine protector x sunshine trope all over again, please read this out to experience how a story can feel like a literal hug.

9. The two lions.

i have and always will love furuya sensei's work, whether it's the iconic the summer of you series or the two lions in itself, the way she developes her characters and the progression of the stories, it is impeccable, the two lions is such a refreshing read that you would not even realize when you developed such a strong connection towards both the characters.

10. Happy Birthday.

i hold a special bias toward author ymz's works perhaps because i have been heavily inspired by most of her works and learned a lot of things about my own writing style, whether it's sayonara heron or happy birthday, the way she writes her characters and the melancholy, everything is so heart warming and wrenching at the same time, happy birthday again is a lot more about friendship with differentiating factors and points where they intersect together in an utterly chaotic yet in an articulate way, the art style has my heart and you should probably experience this story once.

shounen ai mangas that should be a part of your reading list if you enjoy reading healthy and plot driven romances- part 1.

I've been reading bl for years now, the reason why i indulged myself into reading this particular genre was simply because shoujo as a genre is too repetitive, most tropes are overused and it's honestly really hard to find good stories once you've finished the easily accessible popular franchises.

boys love is divided into two sub genres, yaoi and shounen ai, I personally do not enjoy reading smut, it's a different story if intimacy plays an important point for the character development of the characters in the story, but i'am not a huge fan of the porn being used as the plot device for the entire manga and hence i won't be including yaoi mangas in this list.

1. Sayonara, Heron.

Sayonara, Heron is one of those mangas that remain ambiguous and non-linear for the majority of the time but gradually intensify itselves once the ending is near without losing it's delicacy, i won't be talking about the plot since i want you to experience this 7 chapter long manga the way i did, without knowing anything about it, but it's simply about family and relationships, the art style is so pretty, the rooftop, the cigarettes, the kisses, everything. I do not see enough people talking about it and maybe you should help me change that.

2. We're still in the spring of life.

Academics, Aerospace and Adorability, everything about this manga is so heart warming, the hesitation in the beginning of a friendship which ends with a comfortable yet passionate relationship, the naps, the math equations and the confessions, this manga is simply about two boys growing together by simultaneously relying on each other. Also the rocket metaphors have my heart, read it to find them out.

3. Our dining table.

I've always been a huge fan of child care as a separate genre on it's own, but this manga is one of the only romance mangas where the child care part of it actually plays a huge role for the development of the characters, it honestly isn't forced like some omegaverse stories rather it's comforting and actually heart warming to read, the food being used as a love language, the friendships and the bonding amidst the family and the main character is beautiful, give it a go if you want to experience legit therapy lol.

4. Blue sky complex.

Blue sky complex is one of the few shounen ai mangas which seems authentic and raw because of the awkwardness of the characters, the relationship between the characters is easily connectable in the sense that you get the insight of how their head actually works and makes those decisions, it explores gay relationships in a very interesting way, and honestly is very close to my heart because well it's the GLASSES GUY X GOOF BALL trope yet again.

5. Yuki no shita no qualia.

Now, this manga vaguely reminds me of sayonara, heron but honestly is a lot more strong with what it wants to explore, it's one of those mangas that will accidentally make you cry because of the beauty of it's characters and the development of their relationship.

"i think you make me kinder," is better than any "i love you".

Here are some of the animated gifs Santa Monica Studios have been putting out for God of War: Ragnarök

Sorry for the quality, tumblr only allows for 10MB gifs & these are quick & dirty rips straight from twitter which were already not great quality to start.

I'm assuming these are made to be used, so go right ahead & save & use however you like

Animator credits I could find:

Kratos making a heartshape & Kratos swearing about Valkyries by Dennis Pena, aka @/Boltfinger on twitter

Wolf paw slap by Grace Pan, one of the animators

Angrboda making faces by Jack Ebensteiner, aka @/AnimJack on twitter

Sweating Atreus by Kim Nguyen, aka @/KimbaWin on twitter

Thor sliding by Roberto Clemente, a senior combat animator

cat of war part ii

"When the snow falls"

a winter romcom ghostsoap comic by yours truly.

pages 1-4

blurb: Childhood friends reunited after many years. They got separated after joining the military. Contact they tried to keep fell apart. Ghost broke his left arm on the last mission, he is on involuntary leave. Soap is back in town to say goodbye to his late grandpas house.

Cover page incoming soon~

141 men finding out military!reader is only 19 after they break down from being overwhelmed and overworked??

✎ this idea bounces around my head a lot actually and now i have a reason to write it down finally :) i wasn't sure if you wanted them altogether or separately so i did it separately because it's easier lol. i kept it platonic and sfw!

✎ tags : gender neutral!reader, reader has a panic attack, descriptions of violence/injury/death, swearing, hurt to comfort, all platonic relationships, only half proofread

you're barging into the safehouse where he had said to rendezvous, gasping for air that your closed throat won't let through. the rifle held in your dominant hand is dropped as soon as the door is shut behind you, and you're clawing at the straps of your helmet and chest armor to get them off because it's too tight and it's too much and you can't breathe.

this wasn't your first mission. it wasn't even the bloodiest one you'd been on thus far. you could handle the gore and the death and the pure misery of the victims of these situations, because at the end of the day, you were helping them, right?

unless you were too late.

the family had been huddled in a corner, two children laying underneath their parents. there had still been two other rooms to check in the house, but you were running out on shaky legs.

he's in front of you now, looking down at you and asking if you're injured. you're sitting on the floor, heaving for breath and tears pouring from your glassy eyes.

"it's not- it's not fucking fair!" you cried out finally, trying desperately to wipe your face dry on your sleeves, but it only worked to redden your skin further. "why are these people doing this? how could someone be so cruel?"

he sighed softly, not knowing how to respond. the team didn't show emotions like this, they didn't deal with them, not like this. but they had all been here, where you are now. they had all asked why, again and again and again until the word lost all meaning.

"i mean, are we even really helping? god, these people are all already dead! why are we here? why- jesus fucking christ, why am i here?" you rambled; you weren't talking to him anymore. your voice was fizzling out, getting quiet enough that he had to lean closer to hear your unsteady words.

"i can't help these people," you sobbed. "i'm just a kid, i'm only nineteen, i can't- i don't know what i'm supposed to do! they said i was special! they told me- said i was so much better and smarter than everyone else, what a fucking joke!"

☆ simon "ghost" riley

he knew you were young, but fuck, if that didn't break his heart, there was nothing left that would. simon didn't talk to you more than any of the others on the team, but you were special, like a little sibling to the team, to him. always having enough energy and kindness to make up for the rest of them.

seeing you like this was a first, even for him, the man who had seen the worst of the worst. it wasn't like he was immune to emotions, but he had spent so long pressing them all down until he couldn't feel them that this was new to him again. all he could do was offer a hand on your knee that he hoped resembled something like comfort.

"we're almost done here. the heli will come for us soon," he said quietly. "you did good, like always."

he watched and waited with you while your sobs whittled away to sniffles, never moving his hand from your knee, where you had grabbed onto it with one of your own. most people knew not to touch him, that they'd end up with one less hand if they did, but you were an exception.

☆ john "soap" mactavish

at first, he doesn't do anything, just kneels in front of you and stares in shock. you're nineteen? you had always danced around the question that the team would tease you with, asking if you still had to work on your homework, but it was always a joke. now it wasn't.

instead of dwelling, john shifts and sits in front of you, almost hovering over you awkwardly as he tried to figure out what to do. sure, he was one of the more open people on the team, but when you're standing next to ghost, just smiling makes you look emotionally vulnerable.

he takes your hands away from your face and into his, placing them on your lap before gently holding your shoulders. "look, we're almost done here, alright? we'll be far away before you know it." that didn't help much, so he paused again.

the almost-distraught look on his face forced a giggle out of you. his worry turned to confusion, why are you laughing now? you probably shouldn't have been, but the big, scottish military-man fretting over you was kind of funny.

"alrigh', lass, at least something cheered ya up," he grumbled, but turned serious again right after. "higher-ups were right, ya know. you are smarter than the rest of 'em. maybe even smarter than us, yeah?" he said with a smile.

☆ kyle "gaz" garrick

it wasn't that long ago that kyle was where you are now, fresh out of school and eager to prove himself in the military. except it had taken him several years longer than you to reach where you both were now; he had had plenty of time to come to terms with the horrors he saw.

now he realized that you hadn't, because you were smart and you were better than most other people, so they had thrown you in, like a minnow in a piranha pond. by all means, you were doing wonderfully for your circumstances, but you could only keep going for so long.

he sat down beside you, shoulder-to-shoulder, and wrapped an arm around you to bring your head down to rest on him. he sat with you quietly, giving you the time you needed to just get it all out.

eventually, once you're more calm, he breaks the silence with bad jokes that he definitely stole from simon.

"why do twitter users make bad soldiers?" you lifted your head to stare at him incredulously before he continued, "because, they're too quick to retweet."

☆ john price

the captain knew how young you were. he never told you, but he hadn't wanted you on the team at first; the second he was handed your file and saw your birthdate, he started protesting. but it wasn't up to him this time. he couldn't spare you from this, and he knew that it would always weigh on him. he knew he would always remember this, you, crumbling in on yourself in a heap on the floor.

john came down on one knee in front of you and started telling you a story about when he had started, how one of his first missions had gone so terribly wrong. you honestly thought he was just going to tell you to "suck it up" until he told you about one family he had saved during that mission, one that was still alive today. they still sent him letters, even.

"all you need is one good save, kid. and you've got dozens already," he murmured. he wouldn't say it outright, but you really were one of his best.

you remembered the child clinging to your back as you ran out of a collapsing building, the woman who's leg you had managed to get unstuck from fallen debris, the man you had stopped from being executed just in time.

price smiled once he saw he had gotten through to you and helped, at least a little, and roughly patted your shoulder. "evac will be here soon, chin up now."

A comfort and a warm.

Ft. Childe/Ajax

Cw : Male Reader, Reader's a florist! Story written from Childe/Ajax POV Ooc childe sobs. RUSHED ASF. Not proofread

Summary : Ajax has always been a lonely person who kept his burden all by himself, but not until a certain boy came to his life and lit his hollow soul ablaze.

A/N : its alr the end of the year lol, i just wanna say a lots and tons of sorry for being so inactive, basically school is destroying my sanity and i've been trying to finish my last request (very sorry to the anon) anw im writing this to fill my blog since its so empty

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After the abyss incident Ajax could feel that he was nothing but a living corpse that seek nothing but power, even when his family was always by his side and comforting him every night saying how grateful they were that he came back home in one piece, yes he may physically came home in one piece but what about his inner mind? Is he still the cheerful and innocent Ajax they used to know?

Ajax's family were very much aware about his abyss incident, and they were aware about how his mental condition were worsening when he joined the Fatui and yet they said and did nothing about it.

He had it said to himself that the day when the fatui took him in, "This is the end of my youth and the beggining of my day as a warrior, from today onward i promise I'll be stronger to protect those i care about." And thus he left his innocence behind and built himself a mask that he hoped will cover any remant of his childhood self.

Sure the masks of personality he built worked, but at what cost?

Ajax felt as if he was hollow, he wondered to himself if he was still alive at this point, everything he said everything he do felt meaningless even when he came home to the welcoming arm of his family he felt that something inside him were missing, sure he may looked happy but.. is that what he truly felt?

But even after all of that, he remembers one certain incident where... he met a certain boy that changes his view of world.

He remembers vividly, it was a pretty sunny day on liyue, as always ajax was wandering aimlessly whilst admiring the calming and busy atmosphere and even occasionally saying Hi to whoever he met whether it was colleagues or just someone he happens to know, that's until he stumbled upon a very familiar face, You.

—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–— Liyue 2 Years ago.

"Goodmorning comrade, is the flower selling well today?" I said to the person as i fasten up my pace and jumping giddily, a liyuean florist whom i and the other Liyuean people adored, because of his well known calm and reserved demeanor and a sweetest smile he earned a sweet title by the children as a "Sunflower Boy"

"Goodmorning, what should i call you today eh, Maybe young master?" He said while chuckling softly, Sadly unbeknownst to the liyue people He an Fatui Agent, A cold blooded killer hiding behind the sweet smile face that watches all over the Liyue.

"Aw come on (Name), lets put the work aside" ajax turned his gaze towards you while fiddling with the flower on display, "This looked fresh, when did u picked this qingxin?" He asked.

"Last mission, i found a place with lots qingxin so why not harvest it from there?" Heh last mission huh?

"Wasn't the last mission i sent u on was a bloodbath?" I said to him.

Huft... you sighed, "if you want to talk the details about the last mission we better not do it here, Childe."

"Oh? Calling by my codename rather than Tartaglia huh? Interesting" he chuckled, "is it a one step of getting closer?"

Honestly if i could ho and visit you everyday, I would.

"Anyway Childe, what brings you here?" He asked while organizing the flower bouquet.

"Well, i just wanted to see you. Beside i needed a flower for teucer, how much for this one" he said while pointing to a flower bouquet, "that one pretty, im sure teucer would love it."

"Teucer huh? Wait.. Teucer is here??" He turned his gaze at me completely shocked, "How come is he here? Did he run off again."

"Of course not! He said he missed Liyue and Teucer is teucer he begged to go to liyue with me."

"Heh Teucer always like that isn't he? Anyway here's your flower bucket sir, dont forget we have a meeting at 7PM today" he gave the flower bucket to me and grabbed my hand softly "Keep the money, beside i don't want my own superior to pay and dont't forget send my regard to teucer." He smiled fondly.

Somehow something inside my heart is burning truly, i could feel my face heatin up and my heart racing.

"Shit." I cursed down my breath and pulled my hand away from his, "Well ahem!, since we have a meeting today why dont i go treat you some meal before we began our work hm? You've been a really good assistant to me too these days, how about we go for third round knockout?"

"Sounds good! I was getting hungry myself." He said giggling, "but first i need to clean up the flower store." He hurriedly packed the flower away.

"Here let me help you comrade."

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—-

Even until these day i wondered why you would hold my hand at the first place, Your hand not so fit for a florist, calloused and littered with scars but yet i somehow still adored it, at that time i wished the time could stop. I wished that we could hold hand a little longer.

A lot of people say that my action are getting a little too visible, how i smiled when his face randomly came on my mind or how sometimes he came to my office bringing the paperwork i need to do while smiling brightly, or maybe the time when he take cares of me while i was sick. I remember vividly, he would came to my office bringing me a cup of hot tea while ushing me to take a rest and said that he would take my place for a while, oh how sweet of him.

Even my fellow harbinger friend "Signora" said

"Poor boy tartaglia, can't even confess his feeling to his own assistant? You know that our job is dangerous right? death is not a uncommon thing here, either you will run out of time or..."

"Or what signora." I said my tone coming out coldly

"You know it already tartaglia."

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—– 1.45 AM Tartaglia Office

I scribbled down the last stack paperwork i needed to fill and submit whilst feeling that in any second my head could've exploded.

Just what time is it? I turned my head over to the clock sitting next to the sofa clearly showing that its past midnight and yet here i am trying to finish of what seem like non ending paperwork, should i just gave up? I have a free schedule tommorow anyway slacking off a little wouldn't hurt right? Right.

Slowly i could feel that my eyes is getting droopy and my body relaxing, i rested my head down to the desk im working at and slowly drifting to slumber.

But clearly before i was completely sleeping i could hear my office door slowly sliding open following with a long sigh of a certain person?? Honestly i was too tired to even look up and checked who it was.

Again before i knew it the next morning i woke up with a jacket draped over my shoulder and a finished paperwork? Half of it are already submitted i wonder, and a little note saying that i shouldn't overworked myself.

Straightening myself up i take off the jacket and inspected it for a little while finding a nametag signed "(Name)" in it. I couldn't help but let out a little laugh, Why do you care so much about me (Name)?

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After everthing you've done for me, how could i repay you? I remembered one single memory where everything changed, both you and me.

-

Sometimes i could walked down the hallway with a bruised and bloodied body, and yet i never came running down to seek the medical staff, i walked myself to your office, where i know you would stay there and do whatever you needed to do, i know this has been the countless time i did it but yet, you never showed anger you welcomed me with open arms and tended my wound with your gentle hand, a hand that healed my inner self.

I knocked softly on your office door, "(Name) are you there? Its me, i got.. problems."

"Be right there" i could hear a faint shuffling and a rushing steps running to the door.

And the door opened, revealing you with a shocked and somewhat concerned face mixed with "I know this would happen" expression, "Well, good evening comrade as you see uhh i got trouble here." I tried to put my usually bright self.

"Get inside and sit down, let me get my medical kit"

I did as he ordered me to, i sat down to the usualy chair where he tended my wound and maybe sometimes where i would drop in and said Hi to him while he was resting.

"Look Ajax i do not want to hear your reason about this injury, im growing indeed tired of hearing your exact same reason." He said while sitting on a small chair and giving me a gesture to open up my clothes, "Open it i need to see the wounds"

"You know that its better for you to seek the actual medical staff and get yourself patched up there"

"Honestly (Name) my injuries heals faster if the one who patched it up is you" i said while smiling giddily, "But anyway thanks for always doing this though, i know i should've gone to the infirmary but yet i came up running to you"

"Sure yea, this might sting a little stay still."

Sting a little? I couldn't even feel anything when my mind is totally centered to how your hand tended my injuries.

When he patched me up, i stayed silent the rest of the time, i thinked about how he still wants to do this despite scolding me for a thousand time already.

"There and its done" he said while giving my back a little rub, "as i said next time dont overdo it Ajax, anyway here's your clothes the weather is really cold today isnt it?"

"Thank you (Name), and could i ask you something?"

"Ask away Ajax"

"Why do you keep doing this, despite of how many time you said to me that i was a nuisance? And the amount of stuff you did to me. Truly it did leave a mark at my heart, You know that time? When we met and talked at your flower shop and you hold my hand? I swear i couldm't get enough of it, and you know i've been holding myself to say this. I Liked you alot! More than friends if you are wondering, its fine if you dont feel the same, atleast i could get it out of my chest" i poured all the feeling i've been holding on for so many days, secretly i hoped that you would share the same feelings with me.

"And (Name) being with you truly healed my inner self, You did keep me sane the whole time you know that?" I laughed, while trying to hold in the little tears that pooled around the corner of my eye.

"Well Ajax, In fact i did share the same feeling with you, I Liked you too! Way longer than you did, i strucked love when i met you on your recruit days, we were on the same teams that day"

He said while Holding our hand together, but this time it was more genuine.

"I.. how could i not know then?"

"Maybe because you're too busy getting that harbinger title"

"(Name) i do not know how to respond to this, truly thank you, Thank you for everything." I squezzed his hand gently, "Thank You."

I never felt anything more happy than this, That day i feel that he has set my hollow soul ablaze.

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Bonus lmao :

"Hey (Name)" i turned my sight to him

"Yes?"

"Could i ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Kiss the injuries it helps them heals faster"

"....."

"No"

(Name) proceeds to smother ajax w little kisses and yes it make Ajax giggle and kicks his feet like a damn toddler

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Note : Thanks i know that this cringe but thank you truly.

Presented to my silly babi @adrifts-home

some sniper and könig ideas because im soft about them 🥺

könig loves playing with your fingers. he holds your hand any chance he gets. but when he’s get fidgety, he’s grabbing your fingers.

you’re opposites in the fact where he’s chatty on the battlefield, you’ll go deathly silent. whistling a little haunting tune as you pull the trigger.

he’s guarded and it takes time to tear down those walls of his, but you do eventually.

it doesn’t take long for him to warm up to you. even if he doesn’t talk much at first. you don’t mind his silence. its comfortable. he comes to expect your shadow falling onto him during lunch breaks and down time.

you never question the sniper veil he wears. he waits for it, waits for you to ask why he wears it when he’s not really a sniper, but you never do. its one of the things he appreciates about you.

once you win his trust, he’s a much more open book. he spills everything to you: stories about his childhood, about his home, his travels, the scars. you treasure you know these little details about him while no one else does.

he blushes so easily. his skin’s pale and littered with freckles and scars.

he reveals his face to you one night, going to lift his hood only for you to catch his wrist. its too big for you to even get your fingers around, but you hold it. his hand trembles in your grasp. you tell him that he doesn’t have to. but he wants to. he wants you to see him. to really see him.

you craft gifts for könig throughout your friendship. simple but thoughtful small presents. he keeps every single one of them.