I Wish "Making Love" Had Never Been Shriveled And Freeze Dried Into Just A Euphemism For Sexual Intercourse

Are you trapped on tumblr right now?

Is there something you planned to do before you got trapped in the endless tumblr scroll?

Are you yelling at yourself to get up and do the thing, but you can’t, because you’re trapped in the endless tumblr scroll?

Consider this your save point.

Put tumblr down, stand up, stretch, and go do the thing you planned to do. Future you will be incredibly grateful.

I know it’s not hard to point out reactionaries hypocrisy when it comes to like safe spaces or hug boxes or whatever but genuinely how much of an echo chamber do you have to exist in for you to think this is a reasonable thing to say

what do you call your mum?

mum/mom

mother

ma

mama

mummy/mommy

mum in a different language

by her first name

other (say in tags)

i dont have a mum/ dont call her anything

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you're welcome

Zak but when people ask why he can control Cryptids like Kur does he says:

"Kur gave me those superpowers."

"what."

"Yeah so. When your family dedicates their lives to understanding and protecting Cryptids, the whole Evil God of them tends to take notice. Apparently it thinks we're combination priests and emissaries and deserved a power boost."

"huh."

"My Mom can survive in extreme conditions for way longer than she's supposed to. My Dad can instantly figure out the mechanics and exact biology of a cryptid by looking at it. He says it's just years of experience but I don't know who he's trying to fool. My Uncle can befriend any cryptid in like, two seconds."

"no kidding."

Me too

This is so true

I know we'd all love a Keeper convention (other than Shannon's book tours), but it would definitely end in fans physically fighting other fans.

You know what? Reblog with why you'd fight someone at Keepercon.

please spread this so that it can actually be funny instead of just 1 person voting

We all know this site is US-user heavy, but I wanna know how many are vs aren't from the land of capitalism.

The tags are everything I know. I am sharing this with every single one to try and spread the word.