The Conflicting Urges To Act Feminine And Be A Little Goober, And Wanting To Have A Big Beard Amd Be

well maybe if adoption was more accessible to single parents and lesbian couples, witches wouldn’t have to go haggling for people’s firstborns

Having less political friends is horrible because I can never show them my Slavoj Zizek impression

Anarchists of all types ( except SOME ), would you please tell me the easiest way to be acquainted with your specific ideology.

Oh to be a 17th century potion-maker frolicking through a field whilst collecting herbs and spices which I will later put into a nice little drink, which I will gift to a warrior whom I care especially for and it will heal him in battle, and he shall think of me whilst he fights.

I relate to monkeys who tear people's faces off more than any person.

>i met a liberal at the bar tonight

I know where this is going

i met a liberal at the bar tonight. we were talking about the amish and i was like did you know they have IT guys. there's a whole unique windows distro for the amish. it's proprietary. and he was like i guess that's why i'm liberal. and i was like what? and he was like why do you say that like it's a bad thing and i was like i didn't say anything you said that. and he said what's wrong with being a liberal and i said neoliberalism is a project of colonial expansion based on extracting resources from the third world by holding a gun to everybody else's head, so, what's good about that? and he did NOT like that for some reason. he was like are you a republican and i was like no absolutely not. i'm a hologram actually. i'm a russian bot. and he was like you're laughing at me. and i couldn't shake the prevailing impression that what he was really saying was you're being mean to me because you're reacting to this incomprehensible nonsequitur about the amish less warmly than you're reacting to the jokes of your friends. like yeah my friends have been sitting here showing me the tiktok that went viral when somebody paid at their job in pennies and talking about when they went to basic training because their parents got divorced, i literally don't know you or what your views are, how could i be laughing at them. but i heard someone got their ass beat for throwing a hot dog at someone so i guess i better be careful. like what even is the bar. i think i saw lightning strike a lightning rod on top of a building, off in the distance. don't think i've ever specifically seen that before. it was like horizontal, touched down in the middle. and my friend was like what would a russian robot sound like and i was like t.a.t.u.

This will never not be funny to me.

I feel like explicitly mentioning they're a Liberal in the 4th word makes it political!

i met a liberal at the bar tonight. we were talking about the amish and i was like did you know they have IT guys. there's a whole unique windows distro for the amish. it's proprietary. and he was like i guess that's why i'm liberal. and i was like what? and he was like why do you say that like it's a bad thing and i was like i didn't say anything you said that. and he said what's wrong with being a liberal and i said neoliberalism is a project of colonial expansion based on extracting resources from the third world by holding a gun to everybody else's head, so, what's good about that? and he did NOT like that for some reason. he was like are you a republican and i was like no absolutely not. i'm a hologram actually. i'm a russian bot. and he was like you're laughing at me. and i couldn't shake the prevailing impression that what he was really saying was you're being mean to me because you're reacting to this incomprehensible nonsequitur about the amish less warmly than you're reacting to the jokes of your friends. like yeah my friends have been sitting here showing me the tiktok that went viral when somebody paid at their job in pennies and talking about when they went to basic training because their parents got divorced, i literally don't know you or what your views are, how could i be laughing at them. but i heard someone got their ass beat for throwing a hot dog at someone so i guess i better be careful. like what even is the bar. i think i saw lightning strike a lightning rod on top of a building, off in the distance. don't think i've ever specifically seen that before. it was like horizontal, touched down in the middle. and my friend was like what would a russian robot sound like and i was like t.a.t.u.

Today is my 6 month check-up to make sure my boobs don't betray me again, so here is a friendly reminder to check your own boobs once a month!