#stopschoolshootings https://www.instagram.com/p/BvVXoJmnqEu/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1l38wneewhw75
Based so very loosely on this glorious art by @nibbelraz
Airplane transmigrates into the youngest infant son of the Shang family (and God damn he deserves better than this System he is their god!! Daddy Airplane?? Heard of him?? These people should not be changing his damn diaper hello??)
Shang Qinghua is already a young disciple when he visits home and meets his little brother for the first time and does no one else see there is something... off about this kid?
He makes regular trips home afterwards, eventually using An Ding logistics to find reasons to be near his hometown more frequently (and really does no one else see this kid is weird?)
Bby!Airplane is just too smart. SQH is convinced he saw the kid make eye contact with him once when he caught him stealing a dumpling behind their mother's back and it was like looking into the eyes of a demon who'd gut him if he snitched and not a human toddler
It doesn't get better as Airplane gets older and SQH hears him muttering about 1. things he shouldn't know at all regarding the sect when he thinks SQH isn't listening and 2. absolute nonsense (what System has done you so wrong didi?? you are four??)
Before Airplane is old enough to reasonably join the sect, SQH brings him back to the mountain anyway. He is fairly certain his brother is a seer and if that's the case, he's keeping the little welp close at hand
Airplane infinitely regrets how much bullshit he made An Ding deal with to ""hand wave lazy writing"" (shut up peerless cucumber!! he was writing porn not project management!!) but even just watching SQH run himself ragged over the peak has bby him exhausted (no wonder he ratted y'all out to the king yeesh)
He spends his early years as a disciple just following SQH and sometimes nudging his gege into record shattering discoveries because SQH will pat his head when he realizes and take him down the mountain for noodles afterwards (gg easy)
Airplane is a proper disciple in his own right in his teens when his notes and his story get jumbled in a way that has him tripping into one of his shixiongs when he hears the rumors - Head Disciple SJ returned to the mountain with a little brother (record screech glass shattering huh???)
Meanwhile, Shen Yuan transmigrated into Shen Jiu's unnamed younger half-brother After finding stability at the sect, Shen Jiu looks into his birth mother, knowing she sold him off when he was a child What he finds in Airplane's unwritten notes is a Fantine-Cosette backstory where his mother, a courtesan, gave him away to a good family after he was born. She sent them regular payments to ensure his care, but only found out when she was pregnant with SY that they had sold SJ off and were pocketing her money Unable to find SJ and unwilling to risk SY, she and the other courtesans raised SY within the brothel SY transmigrates into the body of a child at his sick mother's bedside with a twisted sense of deja vu having just vacated his own deathbed He doesn't know where he is, but if the orphan protagonist can make it to the sect, so can he right? (Transmigrator Halo? System? System why are you laughing??) He's barely into his second teens when SJ finds him. It takes no time at all after learning the truth for SJ to demand SY's guardianship and whisk him back to Qing Ding (See System? He DOES have a Transmigrator Halo, even if it is attached to the scum villain) SY is honestly shocked by how concerned(?) SJ is when packing his meager possessions. (No Jiu-ge (ew) no one has ever harmed him or touched him wtf would make you think they had?? He's baby??) It takes some time for glaciers to melt and for SJ to let SY in, but SY was raised around kind jiejies who taught him to be better than their worst clients and SJ feels safe around this little brat in a way he can't explain (SJ has had SY for five minutes but if anything happens to him SJ is taking out the entire mountain and then himself) YQY has NO idea how to react when SJ first returns with his brother, but he doesn't hesitate to smooth the way for SY's discipleship and watches from afar as SJ begins to finally let someone in, even if it's not him
SQH keeps telling Airplane he needs to work on his muttering to himself, that it's going to get him in trouble (bro you don't even know) but for once it's in his favor because SY overhears him just enough while YQY is sorting his shit out on arrival and suddenly they're just two spidermen pointing at each other on the peak
Cue the shenanigans of two hometown boys who have no bearing on the plot at all and are just along for the ride while their siblings handle the peaks. Anytime Qing Ding and An Ding need to work together on missions, these two volunteer and confuse the hell out of their martial siblings every step of the way
SJ does not trust the little logistics rat anywhere near his didi and glowers like an alley cat anytime Airplane is around (SQH is right, ofc. His brother IS weird and SJ does not trust it)
SQH meanwhile takes note of his weird didi's sudden and first friendship with SY and immediately starts keeping tabs on this kid because clearly Airplane's seerhood has steered him to SY for a reason, must keep note
The first time LQG makes any sort of fuss about SJ going to a brothel, SY forgets everything he's learned at the sect as Little Brother Mode™ activates to defend not only SJ but his jiejies too. (Fists are thrown. Hair is pulled. He might have bitten his shixiong, he can't say. He sort of blacked out for a minute there) Needless to say there isn't a second time and LQG has an hour long argument with his shizun about trying to poach SY for Bai Zhan peak while nursing a black eye (Airplane just side eying the GREMLIN that transmigrated here like bro wtf)
Before LBH even steps foot on the mountain, both their Systems ping about the incoming protagonist and it's not that they, you know, forgot about the story but they were distracted. Between finding each other and actually weirdly coming to care for these NPCs they... lost track of time
But the System pings and LBH enters the scene and SY refuses to let Airplane's work repeat itself (we're making your notes canon bro stfu and follow my lead. (what lead??? what plan??) I'm working on it!!)
It's a 50/50 crap shoot if SYs favoritism of bby!Binghe endears him to SJ or spikes up the resentment, but SY refuses to let harm come to LBH or for SJ to become the scum villain (someone is yelling, it might be SJ, it might be SY, it might be Binghe who doesn't want Shizun and Shixiong fighting over him)
On the other side of the plot, SQH is still a little snitch, even with his didi's visions guiding him to unprecedented success - but it's more than betraying the sect, more than wanting power and recognition. Seers are insanely powerful, highly sought after. Bringing Airplane to the sect protected him for awhile but SQH can't let him become a target. So when the OG meets MBJ, all his calculations come to a single unfortunate answer: throw your lot in with the biggest fish to protect Airplane (no one else can understand how weird his brother is because if they do his brother will end up dead)
Flash forward to when Airplane is squinting at his brother wearing fur collars year round, always running a little bit chilly for unknown reasons but refusing to see MQF about it. Airplane insists on SQH letting him check his meridians if he won't see MQF and SQH relents, puts his wrist in Airplane's hand, and squawks like a goddamn chicken when Airplane yanks his arm and tugs down his collar to reveal the mark of MBJ on his collarbone and SQH is once again met with that dead eyed 'bro do not fuck with me' stare
SQH does not question how Airplane knows, he just insists on Airplane staying far far away from MBJ (he might work for the demon, but he certainly does not trust him)
Of course Airplane defies all reason and knows the exact secret rendezvous point SQH uses (he did not suffer puberty twice to be denied seeing his most precious creation in the flesh, gege) and is spotted spying on the spy almost instantly by MBJ who is just holding him by his scruff and looking between a wide eyed Airplane and a barely-restrained-panicked peak lord like 'why oh why are there two of them'
Cue a full stand off between a demon and peak lord, ice knives at SQH's throat, a blade hovering at MBJ's heart, and Airplane just held like a kitten between them like fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck that SOMEHOW ends with MBJ rationalizing 'ah this weird mouse is important to my viper of a spy - if I want to keep the viper loyal, I will protect this mouse'
Which throws the Sheng brothers into a mess that neither of them know how to deal with. SQH thinks he needs to continue to be excessively useful to keep Airplane safe. Airplane can't let MBJ know he's his brother's best source or the demon might cut out the middle man. (Meanwhile somewhere MBJ just out here planning to court this weird little mouse to tie SQH's loyalties to him)
Whatever circumstances causes the Abyss plotline to trigger, SY 500% throws himself in after Binghe leaving SJ partially feral because his didi is in danger, Airplane CONCERNED, and SQH just casually like 'oh that's why my brother was interested in him, interesting' not at all realizing no, SY is likely just about to become his boss(-brother-in-law)'s boss's consort - whoops! whoops! whoops!
A section of the Berlin Wall, raised in 1961 and knocked down in 1989. Taken on July 7, 2018. (at Newseum) https://www.instagram.com/p/BoZDHvUHlzR/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=9m07siqle0rc
Shen Qingqiu is kinda proficient at guqin now right? I dont remember how but muscle memory or something??
Do you think he could... recreate modern songs that he knows? 🤔
your brain is my chewtoy omg omg
Thinking about cumplane... scumcumplane...?
The peak lords (sy!sqq and sqh) going on a trip or mission. On that journey, they are met with a plant that entrapped people into tripping over vine-like tentacles, and into their mouth. Their head is shapped like a Venus fly trap—it is constantly open flat on the ground unless it was processing its meal—camouflaged by the greenery that surrounds it.
Sqq was able to notice the plant before anyone got tripped into its jaw simply because he smelled cup ramen. (Something that doesn't exist in ancient China or PIDW.) The plant entices people/animals by letting off a scent that people yearn, whether its perfume or food. If it is inhaled a lot, it can even cause hallucinations and/or paralysis.
Sqh just forgot that he even created the plant for some random, forgotten wife that was devoured by said plant, and lost their qi to papapa with lbh. (Fortunately, in some sense, it was a consented papapa as the random, forgotten wife was lured into the plant's jaw because she was hallucinating lbh after smelling "lbh's" scent for way too long.) It wasn't until sqh literally saw sqq getting his leg devoured did it instantaneously come to mind.
Had sqq, been a second late from jumping away, he would've been completely devoured. However, just one leg was enough for the venus trap to quickly devour sqq's qi. He groans in pain, as the hairs on the plant pierced into his leg.
In the same instant, the vine-like tentacles had yanked sqh up into the air, leaving him hanging upside down. It was probably its next meal after it was done with sqq. Sqh cuts off the entangling vines, sliding down the same vines he had cut before he rolls onto the floor, and lands on one knee acting like some super hero. Practically scoffing proudly because heh, wasn't that so cool of him? (Not the right time to be joking, though!) As sqh gets slammed to the side by another vine. Sqq had laughed at sqh because of how ridiculously stupid this whole situation was, and as a coping mechanism.
The fool coughs, like shit. The attack had knocked the wind out of his lungs. He hackles and wheezes, inhaling the plant's scent way more than necessary. He was lying prone on the leaves that had helped camouflaged the venus trap. It is especially coated with honey-like substance that acts like a sticky trap for insects or mices. He's stuck against the leaf. He covers his mouth with the end of his robe sleeves. Not that it's of any help because of the hallucination/paralysis-inducing trap. Suddenly, he remembered another key point of the venus trap.
His head swung up, eyes widened as he watches the very moment sqq had lost consciousness. "Fuck, Cucumber-bro!" He hissed underneath his breath.
"Wake up...!" He shouts, coughing. "Wake up!" He shouts again, with more urgency. His face twisted in anguish and pain as he couldn't move, he could only watch helplessly as the jaws of the venus trap released sqq's leg, and vines wiggled around sqq's limbs. (It was acting like some tentacle hentai...) That's not the key point, the key point is that the vines have this ability—oh. It needn't be elaborated as sqh gets a first class view of what exactly the vines do.
Sqq echoed...? It was like watching a rock plop into water, causing the surface of the water to riddle wavy lines. It was like watching a player lag back and forth. Sqq's soul—or rather sy's soul—had been ripped away from sqq's body. The vines that had previously been entangling sqq's body dropped him, and was now entangling sy's soul.
"Wake up before your soul gets taken away, Shen Qingqiu!" Unable to move a limb, sqh shouts, screams, and cuss to no avail. He's unable to strip the robes away as the he is being held down by vines. This is not the type of shitty porno he wrote! Hell, why did he just now realize that he doesn't know sy's real name aside from Peerless Cucumber?
And just seconds before the venus trap had open its jaws to chomp sy's soul entirely, the vines were cut into multiple pieces. Its jaw completely cut in half. Green robes fluttered, grabbing ahold of the soul before landing on their one good leg.
Sy's soul glitched like some broken TV frizzing with rgb colors. It cackles as if a fuzz had popped. The soul had previously been a cyan green color. It is now that of a normal human. Their hair is no longer long or ebony, its more slightly gray. Their skin blushed red, they huffed a fever. Their long lashes contorted into their scrunched face, they kind of look adorable... Hell, who the hell is that? It doesn't look like sqq at all, which makes sense as the one that had been occupying sqq this whole time wasn't sqq.
But then, who the hell is actually occupying sqq now...? Of course, who else but the original goods? The original sqq has sy in his arms, looking down at him as if he was looking at some bug. At any moment, he looked like he'll drop sy into the hole where the venus trap had once been hiding in. However, that never comes. He merely stares at sy, looking rather displeased.
With the venus trap dead, the honey-like substance that had once entrapped sqh prone to the leaf had lost its effect. Its unknown how it works, really. May hap it was the results of qi-depletion. Whatever, the details of how the plant works are not that important.
Sqh runs to sqq? Sy? With whatever adrenaline helping him. He looks up at sqq and down at sy before he just hugs the both of them. "Thank you. Oh my fucking god. Thank you, thank you for being alive." It's unknown who exactly he's saying that to...
And then, I never got past this idea! Lmao, it simply loops in my brain, never continuing
"I still can't believe you named not one, but two characters after yourself," Shen Yuan grumbled from where he was using his husband's shoulder as a pillow, arms wrapped around his waist and puffing warm breaths onto his cheek. "And one of them was that shitty fucking spy."
"I wouldn't say he was shitty," Luo Qinghua said, continuing to type away at the draft for his newest chapter. He loved that he was finally able to actually sit and plan his story out now, rather than have to continuously churn out 10k a day just to make ends meet. Small perks of marrying into a rich family.
Shen Yuan sat up to look him in the eye, accidentally leaning too far backwards in the process. Luo Qinghua quickly reached out to grab the other's thighs to avoid them both tipping over. "Shang Qinghua literally gets exposed as a spy--"
"After several fucking years--"
"--And is immediately killed by Mobei-Jun afterward because he's of no more use!" Shen Yuan continued on as if he hadn't been interrupted. "I'm just saying that you could and would do a far better job. Even though you suck at being sneaky."
"Ahaha, yeah," Luo Qinghua said, averting his gaze. What his husband didn't know about the limited edition PDIW merch he had hidden away in the closet for his upcoming birthday, couldn't hurt him. Shen Yuan narrowed his eyes at him and opened his mouth, so Luo Qinghua quickly kept going. "Well, even if I could do it, I don't know if I would've been able to do all those things Shang Qinghua did, anyway. Planning murder and sabotaging sects isn't really my hobby, you know?"
"Mhm." Shen Yuan pursed his lips, still suspicious, but deciding to go with it. Crisis averted! Though Luo Qinghua knew that Shen Yuan would bring it up later. "I think you'd be clever enough to, but yeah, you wouldn't." Shen Yuan suddenly smirked and unwound his arms from around Luo Qinghua's waist, reaching up instead to interlock them around his neck and pull him closer. "Either way, if I were Mobei-Jun, I would've kept you."
"I'm your husband, even if I was the worst spy on Earth, you would've kept me, regardless," Luo Qinghua deadpanned. Still, he felt his face flushing a light pink. The way Shen Yuan was looking at him made his skin prickle with warmth.
"Mm, exactly," Shen Yuan hummed and pressed his mouth to Luo Qinghua's collarbone. Luo Qinghua shivered. His voice shifted, lower and teasing. "Husband."
"Yes, A-Yuan?" One of his hands stayed on Shen Yuan's thighs while the other reached up to rest on his lower back, caressing the soft skin peeking out from beneath his shirt.
"Save your draft and turn off your laptop."
Luo Qinghua was moving before Shen Yuan had even finished.
I love fanfic!Dick's nicknames for his brothers, like Baby Bird and whatnot. But whenever I read "Little Wing" in a fic as a nickname, I have such a visceral reaction because whoever he's speaking with transforms into a chicken wing immediately in my head
do you know how disorientating that is??? to have Damian turn into a chicken wing in my head???? I have to turn him back into Damian and then Dick says Little Wing again and he's back to a chicken wing. ugh
(We always have a lof of SJ-SY or SJ/SY bodyshqring and honestly, we do not have enough
But im here today bc i was walking home today and my brain is too focused on sv and produces on an almost daily basis even when I don’t have the energy for writing
ANYWAYS
Honestly i would love LBH and SY sharing a body, or Qijiu, or moshang, or LiuShen or B9, etc etc)
But what if:
The system made a mistake
And now SY is stuck in the rat of Cang Qiong’s body. Shang Qinghua.
The problem?
The body inhabitant is not gone.
The relief?
It turns out its another transmigrator!
Then, where does Shen Yuan’s rage come from?
Well, this absolute hack of a writer is airplane shooting towards the sky, he has already pledged his (their now, wtf) loyalty to Mobei-jun, the demonic ruler of the northern kingdom. AND! HE DOES NOT WANT TO TAKE LUO BINGHE INTO AN DING!!!
This bastard doesn’t want to “expose” himself to the protagonist’s rage.
Excuse him?!?!?!?
Airplane will see!
No matter how much he protests, Shen Yuan will bring that tiny child to their peak and hug the heck out of his tights
SQH: cucumber-bro, do you really want to bring the protagonist himself into the overworked company atmosphere tgat is An Ding???
SY: well…at least it’s better than outright bullying and abuse on Qing Jing isn’t it?
Shen Yuan doesn’t care! He will snatch Luo Binghe for himself and save them all! Little faith from airplane or not!
Between the numerous System notifications that were finally starting to clear out and the implications of what he's learned, Shen Yuan felt dizzy.
He can tell that the other Shen Qingqiu is absolutely serious about marching over to Yue Qingyuan and murdering him. He had averted the initial crisis but now he had prevent a crime from happening while trying to wrap his head around the fact that, apparently, a person named Shen Yuan, who was also potentially him, had existed in some other world. And was brothers with Shen Jiu.
Did that mean there were other versions of himself who read the same novel but ended up in different places and in different bodies? He had been making shit up on the fly when he had told the Original Goods that he had escaped the Qiu and was pretending to be Shen Jiu, but for all he knew, it might have been true after all. It made something in his stomach squirm to think that a version of himself might have been the one to hurt Binghe.
Before he could continue to contemplate this, Shen Qingqiu-- that was confusing-- Shen Jiu shook him gently by the shoulders.
"A-Yuan, get your head out of the clouds. I can't believe you still do this, how have you gotten this far?" The other peered at him closely, identical green eyes flicking between his own. Despite his frown, Shen Yuan could tell he looked worried. With a lowered voice, he asked, "You look pale. Is it System again?"
Shen Yuan blinked. Wait, was Shen Jiu also another transmigrator? How did he know about the System?!
----
"You're not me, are you?" the other Shang Qinghua casually asked with a small smile. His eyes were dead. "I can tell. You're someone else."
"I don't know what you mean." Shang Qinghua smiled back, though he was pretty sure he was glaring daggers at the other. He did not come this far to have his cover blown by this slimy version of himself! He had to strike first. "Hm, how's your friend? The one from the North."
His alternate's self's smile dropped immediately. It gradually returned when he said, "Like you don't know." He smirked. "Come now, Feng-er. You and I both know that you've always followed in your gege's footsteps. This is no different."
Shen Qingqiu was doomed.
He stood still, fluttering his fan nervously and trying to avoid catching his counterpart's, the real Shen Qingqiu, glaring eyes from across the room. Instead, he idly observed the other Cang Qiong Mountain Peak Lords, trying to spot the differences between the ones he knew and their alternates.
Liu Qingge had brought back a strange artifact from one of his hunts to the monthly Peak Lord meeting. It was a mirror, rimmed an ugly tarnished gold, topped with a decoration that was shaped into an unidentifiable creature with ruby red eyes.
[Important Artifact Detected: Red-Eyed Sphinx's Mirror! Quest starting...]
Shen Qingqiu had been trying to remember where it might have appeared in PIDW when the surface of the mirror suddenly began to glow a dull yellow. It quickly brightened until it obscured everyone's vision.
And then, there stood another set of peak lords across the room, facing them down.
System, what on earth is going on???
[Quest started: Lost Long Spirit in My Reflection! Other characters have been transported to this universe. Host must find a way to send them back without revealing his identity as a transmigrator.]
WTF? I didn't agree to this!
[Good luck!]
System??? Get back here!
While the two Yue Qingyuans and Xu Qinglis conversed together to try to understand what had happened, the other peak lords had begun to mingle with each other, curious about their counterparts.
Shen Qingqiu tried to suppress his panic, sticking close to Shang Qinghua. His Yue Qingyuan occasionally flicked his softened gaze towards the alternate Shen Qingqiu, likely noticing that the other still acted as he used to before his qi deviation. In fact, several of the peak lords he had gotten to know over the years were sending some looks at the other Shen Qingqiu.
With the original goods right there, how long would it be before something exposed him as a fraud?? What if he was confronted about why he acted so differently?
[Host must avoid having his identity exposed. Being revealed as a transmigrator will result in Host being immediately sent back to his old body.]
Yeah, yeah, same shit as always!
Looking to his side, Shang Qinghua seemed to be experiencing the same threats, desperately looking away from the more dead-eyed Shang Qinghua across the room who, luckily, was barely paying him any attention.
Fuck, what do we do?
---
Shen Qingqiu continued to glare at the Other Shen Qingqiu in the room. The other Shen Qingqiu was so obviously a fraud, he could tell within minutes of being here. While his alternate seemed somewhat familiar, he didn't act like him at all, his mannerisms were all off, and despite the attempt at keeping a poker face, Shen Qingqiu could tell that he was nervous. Probably at being caught out.
His alternate self had likely been replaced with a bodysnatcher or some sort of spirt, if they truly were supposed to be the same person. Was everyone else stupid, or had they had their brains sucked out by a Heart Mouthed Lobster-Squid?
Or maybe they simply like the bodysnatcher better and didn't bother to investigate.
Shen Qingqiu's face became stormier, turning his glare to the Other Yue Qingyuan, wondering if he had felt happier once his precious Xiao-Jiu had vanished. The other Yue Qingyuan's face grew even more pathetic. Tch. Typical.
"That stupid System--" Shen Qingqiu nearly snapped his neck in looking at the bodysnatcher upon hearing his murmur. The fraud, upon noticing his sudden attention, clammed back up and looked away. But Shen Qingqiu knew what he heard.
Xi Tong.
He hadn't heard those words in years, not since--
He stepped forward, scanning the other once more. Upon a second, more thorough look, Shen Qingqiu realized that he grew more familiar. He wore his hair in the way that Shen Qingqiu wore it, but looser and less severe. His eyes were clearer and lighter, with hints of a smile, despite his nerves. He occasionally quickly glanced up and to his left, as if seeing something there, before bringing his attention back to the room at large.
No. It couldn't be. He was long dead, despite Shen Qingqiu's best efforts. Even if the fake had some similar things about him, that doesn't mean--
Shen Jiu had once had a brother, besides Qi-ge. Slightly smaller than him, despite the fact that Shen Jiu passed him along as much food as he could when on the streets. He smiled so much despite their circumstances, and was so kind despite Shen Jiu constantly telling him that he was making himself a target. But he looked so, so similar to Shen Jiu himself. They could have switched their clothes and looked exactly the same, if one didn't notice the difference in their demeanors.
His brother has also always been a little odd, talking to himself and arguing with an imaginary friend that only he could see named Xi Tong. One of the reasons that they survived as long as they did on the streets was due to the inexplicable knowledge that his brother seemed to have. Somehow, his brother knew about the various plants or small animals that they could hunt and sell for a pretty coin in the markets. Shen Jiu never asked, not looking a gift horse in the mouth.
But his brother was dead. He had died years ago, in the time during when they were in Qiu's manor. During a punishment for Shen Jiu's attempt to get them both to join Wu Yanzi; he had switched their clothes and taken Shen Jiu's place and died for it. That had been the final catalyst that made him set the manor ablaze and escape, mourning his brother's death as his fault for daring to be free. Cursing Qi-ge for not coming back for them.
Dazed and his vision dim, Shen Jiu took another step forward, and another. Hope, something he thought he had killed off long ago, slowly rose in his chest.
Had his brother survived in this world? Had he managed to escape alongside Shen Jiu? Or had Shen Jiu died in his place? Dimly, he can't help but think that the world would be far kinder if that were the case. If his brother had made it to Cang Qiong Mountain and became a peak lord all on his own and still managed to keep his smile. If he didn't have Shen Jiu dragging him down with him.
The other Shen Qingqiu, not having noticed his approach, laughed at something the other Shang Qinghua said ("Wonder if Shang Qinghua is a traitor here, too," Shen Jiu thought dimly). His laugh was the same. He rose his fan to hide his face, but Shen Jiu noticed how his nose crinkled, and his eyes nearly closed in delight, exactly like--
"A-Yuan?"
Cumplane, Shang Qinghua & Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu (vibes are there for both, readers choice). Canon universe.
It’s not like Airplane could be expected to remember everything he wrote about; he’s not Cucumber-bro who could simply flip through his rolodex of complaints for whatever plotline they stumble into. Writing isn’t an exact science, there’s too many scenes gutted for their edible flesh and the bones discarded onto his cluttered apartment floor for him to keep track of who, what, when, where. He’d been fucking starving, okay? Real singing-for-his-supper shit which is cute when he had been in his twenties, desperate when he hit thirty, and downright chronic when forty began to loom on the horizon. So all of the papapa scenes that got Cucumber-bro’s silken boxers in such a twist had been necessary after a point, the reasons thinner and thinner as he scraped his knife against his bread to make it stretch further.
“Disgraceful,” Shen Qingqiu snaps, each syllable as crisp as the fan he wields with devastating accuracy at the back of Shang Qinghua’s head. He’s pulling his blows, a necessity given their current situation, and Shang Qinghua takes the next corner without slowing, planting his sword in the ground to give him the leverage needed.
“Hey, bro! Not cool.” Shang Qinghua hefts Shen Qingqiu higher — fuck, there’s barely anything to him, inertia might be keeping him stable but it wasn’t doing anything to cushion the hips currently bruising Shang Qinghua’s shoulder, his collarbone — wobbles and keeps running. “Not my fault that you seem to be wife-plot catnip for every poor sucker you bat your eyelashes at.”
“I do not—” Another corner, another slide of Shen Qingqiu across Shang Qinghua’s shoulder, slight enough that if he keeps whining then Shang Qinghua is just going to tuck him under one arm to carry him. Out of the corner of his eye, Shen Qingqiu’s face is crimson, a flush covering his sharp features like a veil. “—bat my eyelashes!”
He does. Might be thinking it makes him look sophisticated or even mysterious, that lidded gaze from behind his fan, and it does. Sometimes.
“You agreed to be a human sacrifice, Cucumber-bro.”
“Airplane-bro, it’s the wife-plot for 287, I’m sure of it.”
Fuck, how many narrow alleyways did one small town need? In the distance, Shang Qinghua can still make out the mob condensing behind them, their shouts barely audible beneath the desperate pounding of his own heart.
Shen Qingqiu continues, measured the same way he must have written his novels entirely in comment-format, rapid-fire and barely pausing for breath. “She was the daughter of a village chief and Binghe encountered her during a spring festival that was held every ten years, like everytime he turned up at some small village.”
“Cucumber-bro, it was what the readers wanted and festivals are fun and convenient.”
“Hack writer.”
“Who’s carrying your skinny wife-plot arse around.”
Shen Qingqiu scowls, palpable through the very air cooling several degrees. Shang Qinghua, his heart lodged in his throat, his lungs burning for air, reflexively turns to look for a portal, waits for a heavy hand on his shoulder. Shit, he meant to send a missive to his king over an hour ago. They round another corner, Shang Qinghua’s shoulder knocking into the building opposite, bruising but that’s a problem for later, and slide to a halt.
A crowd stares back, dark eyes glittering beneath the flare of their torches, faces shadowed by the encroaching gloom.
Shen Qingqiu lowers himself to look beneath Shang Qinghua’s elbow, the ornament from his hair finally coming loose and landing with a gentle plink on the cobblestones. His hair falls freely with it, dark tresses brushing the ground.
“Give us back the maiden!” A voice shouts from the back, indignant, brash to match the flourish of a blade drawn.
“Time to run. Again!”
“Head for the outskirts,” Shen Qingqiu snaps, fumbling with the pouch at his waist as he drags himself back upright. It’s uncomfortable, a hand shoved between a press of bone against bone, a flare of energy that bursts behind Shang Qinghua’s eyes like a three-day-old headache. “If we can just set off the fireworks, then the festival will be over and they’ll stop chasing us.”
“Remind me how that’ll work? Your plan so far was to volunteer—” Shang Qinghua raises his voice to a near shout, slamming his words over Shen Qingqiu’s spluttered complaint. “—and then say ‘No time to explain. Just grab the fireworks and follow me.’ You got three steps away.”
“Without-A-Cure was your creation.”
“This entire place is my creation.” Shang Qinghua can’t let himself dwell too long on that fact because then he’d need to sit down somewhere dark and quiet and chew his knuckles until they bleed. The buildings are becoming sparser now, glimpses of the horizon visible in the spaces between them, but it doesn’t help the sinking sensation of eyes crawling over his skin, something small and fragile skittering out in the open while a predator circles overhead.
Shouts echo behind him but he doesn’t slow, vaulting over a fence and sinking into the tangle of grass on the other side. He lands on his knees in a crouch, tipping himself sideways to let Shen Qingqiu down with a grunt of effort. He’s no longer moving so the panic begins to fizz in his belly, his eyes wide and staring out at the tiny pinpricks of light filtering between the buildings. “What now?”
“Wife 287 was scheduled to participate in the festival but Binghe’s cultivation prowess caused a reaction and the spirits were appeased early.”
Shang Qinghua chews his lower lip, pulling some of the grass free in front of him and twisting it around his fingers. Lights skim across his vision, the crowd still searching for them both, and he ties a knot into the grass, beginning to braid it. “So, fireworks?”
“Fireworks. If you could?”
It’s kind of nice to just lie down and watch the fireworks rain overhead. Shen Qingqiu’s fingers twist into Shang Qinghua’s, squeezing tight before they relax.