DON'T FORGET, THE WISH REWRITE IS OUT! NEW CHAPTERS EACH WEEK!

DON'T FORGET, THE WISH REWRITE IS OUT! NEW CHAPTERS EACH WEEK!

The Great Wish Movie Rewrite Chapter One

The Great Wish Movie Rewrite Chapter One

Merry Christmas, and a happy New Year!!!!! Chapter one of my next project, The Great Wish Movie Rewrite, is up on AO3! Read it here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61920016

What to expect:

Magnifico is the protagonist, and we see the story and his non-one-dimensional struggle through his perspective.

Asha and Amaya are antagonists.

Star Boy is in it.

NO OCS!!!!!!!!! Just a straightforward, comprehensive narrative of what the movie should've been like.

(This work is complete, and knows where it's going, and a new chapter will be added every Friday).

Excerpt:

In most monarchies, the king claims sovereignty over his people, but in the kingdom of Rosas, King Magnifico’s subjects were the tyrants. 

It was his fault, he thought regretfully, for using sorcery in the first place to begin granting wishes. He should have remembered that a genie was a prisoner to the whims of others, and so too his ability left him at his people's mercy. 

“I want a million coins! A parakeet, a banana split, a swimming pool, a trampoline, uhhh. . .” a little boy licking a lollipop was sitting on his lap, demanding.

"Well, we'll see about that." Magnifico glanced around for the boy's parents. "How did you get past the guards?" The palace gates, flanked by statuesque soldiers, led to the long, carpeted hallway that opened to the throne room. There the king sat upon his throne, resplendent in star-stitched robes, with all the dignity of Father Christmas.

"Great! When grown ups say 'we'll see about that', it always means yes!" The little boy jumped up off the king's lap, then skipped away, outside into the queue of people waiting their turn to make a wish. 

Resentfully, King Magnifico raised his sceptre, then granted the boy’s wishes with a sweeping shimmer, since he had no heart to disappoint him. 

As the boy disappeared, someone else stepped forward, shoulders slumped in sorrow. “My king,” said a peasant girl, coming up to the throne, clutching a shawl around herself. “My mother twisted her ankle, and can no longer walk after slipping on one of our chicken's eggs. She’s unable to even stand upright. Will you heal her?”

King Magnifico quickly forgot the previous boy's entitlement, and nodded slowly. "A twisted ankle? That is a serious affliction." 

"It's swollen to the size of the egg she slipped on."

The king raised his scepter, then waved it in an arc, healing the girl's mother at once. “There, her pain is gone now,” he said as the girl’s eyes widened, and a smile spread across her face. She bowed, then turned to leave, and Magnifico remembered briefly why sorcery was a blessing.

But no sooner had the girl disappeared, than through the grand doors strode a middle-aged man with fox-like features and an air of impatience. A long travelling cloak billowed behind him as he marched with a walking stick up to the king, who studied him with a steady gaze.

"Your Majesty," the man began without even a bow, "I come to you with a request. I have heard of your power to grant wishes, and seek your aid."

The king leaned forward. Magnifico possessed an innate desire to help those in need, and often found it difficult to say no, but he grew weary since lately it was becoming clear that a fool who makes a wish often finds that what he desires has consequences. 

"Well, go ahead.” Magnifico waved his hand. “Speak your wish.”

The man’s smile faltered for a moment, but he quickly recovered it, then said without shame, "I wish for absolute power. I desire to command armies, to rule with an iron fist, and to have the loyalty of every citizen."

Magnifico’s eyes narrowed, and his voice grew cold as he replied, “Such a wish speaks to ambition beyond measure. But power without wisdom is a path of which to be wary.”

“Sure, sure.” The peasant stood tall as he pulled a scroll from his cloak. “Now, let me be clear on the terms and conditions of this wish: no action, policy, or decree should be contested or overturned by any other entity. I require immunity from any form of legal or physical retribution. This wish should remain in effect for the duration of my lifetime, and extend to my successors, ensuring that the absolute power granted is maintained beyond my tenure. Once granted, this wish must be irrevocable to any changes or nullifications.”

The king’s gaze grew colder still. “I see,” he said. “You think you can waltz in here and demand absolute power with such brazen terms? Absolute authority is not a game to be played. It must be wielded with responsibility.”

The peasant smirked, and folded his arms. “Oh, please. Save the moralising. We’ve no objection to you as a wizard, you know, but as a king we hate you.”

King Magnifico’s heart rate quickened, but his voice remained even. “You are not just seeking to overthrow me; you are aiming to become a tyrant. Power without limits corrupts, and turns rulers into monsters. I will never allow this kingdom to be weakened by the hunger for control. I hereby decree your banishment. Guards, escort this man out of the palace, and ensure he departs from our borders immediately. Any attempt to defy this order will be met with execution. Let it be known our kingdom will always stand against the darkness of greed. We will remain a land of generosity and justice.”

As the king’s words echoed through the throne room, the guards stepped forward with practised ease. They seized the peasant by the arms, who, despite wriggling like a snake, was no match for their strength. The guards dragged him towards the gates.

“I will not be treated like this!” the man sputtered, flailing his arms. “I demand to speak to someone in charge!”

“I am in charge!” Magnifico banged his fist against his throne’s armrest. But he began to see that by giving gifts freely, even if he sat on the throne, his people wielded the power. He was constrained by the very magic that defined him, having to listen to a thousand such ridiculous requests a day. And most times, his subjects couldn't even get their teeth around the word 'thank you'. 

King Magnifico knew things could not go on this way, and so that night, he asked for the counsel of the person he trusted most to advise him: his dear wife, Amaya, who he called to the top of the tallest tower in his palace.

Finish reading: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61920016

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8 months ago

ONLY ONE MORE CHAPTER TO GO!!!!! I'M SO EXCITED!!!!!!

archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Because the original had a lot of plot holes and wasn't satisfying.

What to expect:

1. Actually tells the Once-ler's whole story from beginning to end (no Ted)

2. Gives Once-ler more agency and develops his motives beyond "my family made me do it."

3. Includes "You're all going to jail!" scene

4. Animals die/the stakes are raised

5. Logical explanations for why they couldn't just plant more trees or use a ladder, why Once-ler didn't just plant the seed himself, etc.

6. The Lorax is actually significant

7. Characters like Once-ler's dad, Norma, and O'Hare are woven in, but don't steal the spotlight. (Example: Norma isn't an annoying girlfriend who steals the role of the Lorax).

8. NO ANNOYING OCS, MARY SUES, OR STUPID ROMANCES!!!!!!!!!! Just a straightforward, comprehensive narrative of what the movie should've been like.

This entire novel is complete and has been through multiple drafts. If you follow it, you can be sure that it does have an ending and the author knows where it's going with foreshadowing and extra plot twists. Chapters will be released each week.

10 months ago

Chapter 7 (The Wrath of Nature) is up. Excerpt below:

Chapter 7 (The Wrath Of Nature) Is Up. Excerpt Below:
archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

(This specific scene was one of the main reasons I wanted to rewrite the movie).

"If you meant no harm, then why did you put my bed in a river?!"

"I didn't mean harm, my touch was light, a gentle breeze, for the softest flight. I merely meant to float you away, to a land of dreams, to another day."

"ARE YOU STUPID?!" Once-ler exploded. "I FIND THAT VERY HARD TO BELIEVE! OF COURSE THAT WAS A DANGEROUS IDEA! And you're telling me you didn't know there was a waterfall there when you're supposed to be the all-knowing Guardian of the Forest?!"

The Lorax was speechless, caught in his lies. "Remember your promise, I'll hold you to it now. In the river you swore and made a vow."

"I said that because you were threatening my life. Do you really think you've accomplished anything?"

"Hear this important plea, loud and clear," said the Lorax. 'Everyone needs the trees that are here! 'We need the wood,' the voices cry, 'To live and stay, or else we'll die.'"

Once-ler felt a speck of pity when he realized the Lorax really was that dumb. In his simple mind he’d really thought his plan to blackmail Once-ler into a promise was going to guarantee the safety of his sacred Truffula Trees. Typical fey creature.

"Okay, that's it." Once-ler finally grabbed the Lorax by the scruff of his neck. "You've manipulated and tricked me. You've tried to kill me. Let's have this out once and for all. I refuse to be bullied out of this forest. If you can actually give me a logical explanation for why I shouldn't cut down the trees, then I'll stop. How bad can this really be, huh?"

"Fine, have it your way, we'll talk, indeed," the Lorax said. "But know I'm earnest, and please take heed."

"Fine."

Once-ler dropped the Lorax onto a stump, where he stood up straight and cleared his throat. He said in a meaningful voice:

"You think you can chop down whatever you please. But everyone here needs the trees."

"That's too vague," said Once-ler at once. "You have to explain what problem it causes, so we can figure out how to solve it."

"Well," said the Lorax, "my feathered friends have all made nest, in the trees they decided they liked best. You can't impose upon their tweets, and come and steal their cozy retreats."

"Okay," said Once-ler. "Then I just won't cut those ones down."

"Oh, great excuse, I'm sure you know best, but how will you tell which ones have nests?"

"I promise to use my binoculars every time."

The Lorax considered this. "Well, my dear sir, even if that part might be alright, what about the fruit in which Barbaloots delight? This fare is their favorite sweet, juicy treat. They aren't the type of bears that just eat meat."

"Wait," said Once-ler. "There are a bunch of other trees around here that have fruit. So they won't be affected."

The Lorax sighed. "Beyond that, other things are at hand. Trees create fresh air for the rest of the land. Through leaves so frugal, they drink the air, and give it life, don't you even care?"

"Okaaaaay," Once-ler considered. "But counterpoint: there are still lots of other trees and plants around here to contribute to photosynthesis."

"I'm afraid I haven't been explaining this right," the Lorax said frustratedly. "Because the Truffula Trees are a special type. It takes hundreds of years for them to grow. Why waste them on cheap products, I don't know!"

Unfortunately, the insult only distracted Once-ler from his strongest argument.

"Hey, my product is NOT cheap! I put tons of effort into developing it. The Thneed actually took lots of research, and I had to fight and sacrifice a lot—"

"Alright, alright, you're getting offended! This conversation should really be ended. I'm just saying don't waste ancient trees. I don't see why it's so hard to agree…"

(Read the rest on Ao3).

It was really hard not to make the Lorax seem like a psychotic jerk here. I decided to make him into more of an unpredictable fae creature who will show more depth and have his say later.

I wanna try my best to steelman both sides in this, because the movie accidentally made Once-ler the most sympathetic by far. (Though even he didn't go far enough). Gonna give the Lorax his due soon.

The argument was important for me to include here, because the Lorax had no arguments in the movie and only relied on manipulative music.

10 months ago

Chapter 8 is up!

archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapter 8 Is Up!

EXCERPT:

He'd finally become such a joke to the townsfolk, it seemed they'd entirely forgotten he was human.

Instead of just tomatoes, the grocer volunteered wheelbarrows of spoiled produce that some teenagers mixed with glass and rocks. A particularly well aimed stone knocked out a tooth as he was belting out his favorite jingle:

"The Thneed is good, the Thneed is grea—YOW!"

Once-ler usually didn't stop for anything, but the taste of blood made him drop his guitar on his foot. This hurt even worse, so he sprang up and down. The guitar bounced onto the concrete while the crowd laughed and cheered.

Once-ler didn't get a chance to see if the instrument had broken, because, in a fit of enthusiasm, the mean little girl with red hair ensured this was the case. She smashed it on the ground with the second worst noise Once-ler had ever heard.

A tomato landed in his stunned face, but he didn't even feel it. He just watched open-mouthed as fruits and vegetables pelted him and the girl stomped on the pieces, giggling with her parents who stood back and watched.

"Alright, sweetie, that's enough, we have to get to Grandma's house," the mother finally told her. She smiled and pulled out a big bag of chocolate-coated pretzels for her daughter as they walked away.

Once-ler's last shred of optimism finally evaporated. After his father had passed away, the guitar had been the only good memory he'd had from home.

"THAT'S IT!" he roared. "I've had enough!" He stormed from the gazebo with tears in his eyes.

Only the baker looked slightly sympathetic. She twisted a strand of curly brown hair around her finger as he strode past.

"Is this really the way to treat a stranger?!" he heard her yell at the grocer.

"Oh, come on, Norma, he's just a self-centered out-of-towner." The grocer sounded slightly abashed.

Once-ler turned to see Norma stomp her foot. "I know he is, and I know that piece of junk he's selling looks like a wadded up piece of bubblegum with hairs stuck in it, but you just gotta understand! Homeless mentally ill folks need to be shown charity..."

Her words just infuriated Once-ler more. "My family was right. I quit!" He ripped the Thneed from his neck, and accidentally whipped the baker in the face as he threw it away. It knocked off her glasses, which fell to the ground and shattered. Oops.

He walked away faster. Luckily his long legs took him back to the forest before anyone could call the police.

9 months ago

No chapter of the Lorax Rewrite this week because I want to do some extra editing. (Unless I get it done more quickly than I think). This is gonna be the chapter that's least related to the movie's original plot, but should add some extra character development and twists in the end.


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10 months ago

New chapter is up!

archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
New Chapter Is Up!

Preview:

The first place Once-ler tried his luck was the city of North Nitch where the biggest businesses were. It was a city of rainbow, sleek buildings twisted into swirly shapes and blinking lights, filled with the latest technology, including traffic lights with seven colors instead of three. He lost track of how many times he almost got run over in traffic trying to understand what they were supposed to mean.

O'Hare's Business and Innovation Center was the biggest, sleekest, twistiest building where he made an appointment to pitch his product. He rode an elevator up to the hundredth floor at the top of the building where helicopters flew so close to the window it looked like he could touch them. The O'Hares were a famous line of CEOs who ran all the major companies in every country.

Once-ler pulled his guitar from his back, mentally going over the pitch he'd carefully prepared for the team of salesmen. He took a deep breath, and began:

"The great is Thneed… I mean, the Thneed is good," he missed a note, completely forgetting how to sing in anapestic tetrameter.

READ THE REST ON AO3!

Join me as I post an actually finished rewrite of this entire movie! Extra plot twists, foreshadowing, and embellishments, since I did multiple drafts! Nobody ever finished a full rewrite before, so I did it myself.


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9 months ago

Chapter 11 is up!

Chapter 11 Is Up!
archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

IF YOU HAVEN'T STARTED READING NOW, IT'S JUST GETTING TO THE FUN PART!

Excerpt:

As the meetings became more frequent, the character he had invented started to take on a life of its own. It was no longer just a way to get through the day. He would slip into his green suit, the color of money, and with it, would transform into someone else entirely. His voice would change—louder, more charismatic, filled with a confidence that didn’t quite belong to him. His handshake would be firmer, his smile broader, his laugh just a bit too loud.

Brett, Chet, and Gizette, who had seen the transformation firsthand, started calling him “Greed-ler” behind his back. They found the whole thing hilarious, completely different from the brother they knew. Gizette doodled pictures of Greed-ler on scraps of paper, turning him into a cartoon character with exaggerated features and dollar signs in each eye.

It wasn’t long before Greed-ler became more than just a private joke. The image of the green-suited CEO with a maniacal grin spread throughout the company, and soon, it wasn’t just his siblings drawing cartoons of him. Employees began to share these drawings, and Greed-ler started popping up in more official places—on company newsletters, posters, even merchandise. What began as a role to get through the day turned into the official mascot of Thneeds Inc.

READ THE FULL CHAPTER ON AO3!

This chapter is a little longer because I want to take my time showing how Once-ler's personality devolves. I've also never seen any writing about what an average day at the company would be like. As I go through the whole movie, I want to thoroughly explore every last thing like this for once. There really is more than a novel's worth of potential in this story, if it's given its due.

Also, instead of always making Once-ler doubtful about his family's selfishness, I wanted it to be clear he was joining in with them and being an equally terrible or worse person. This is key to making the story work and have a more powerful lesson.

5 months ago

The Great Wish Movie Rewrite Chapter One

The Great Wish Movie Rewrite Chapter One

Merry Christmas, and a happy New Year!!!!! Chapter one of my next project, The Great Wish Movie Rewrite, is up on AO3! Read it here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61920016

What to expect:

Magnifico is the protagonist, and we see the story and his non-one-dimensional struggle through his perspective.

Asha and Amaya are antagonists.

Star Boy is in it.

NO OCS!!!!!!!!! Just a straightforward, comprehensive narrative of what the movie should've been like.

(This work is complete, and knows where it's going, and a new chapter will be added every Friday).

Excerpt:

In most monarchies, the king claims sovereignty over his people, but in the kingdom of Rosas, King Magnifico’s subjects were the tyrants. 

It was his fault, he thought regretfully, for using sorcery in the first place to begin granting wishes. He should have remembered that a genie was a prisoner to the whims of others, and so too his ability left him at his people's mercy. 

“I want a million coins! A parakeet, a banana split, a swimming pool, a trampoline, uhhh. . .” a little boy licking a lollipop was sitting on his lap, demanding.

"Well, we'll see about that." Magnifico glanced around for the boy's parents. "How did you get past the guards?" The palace gates, flanked by statuesque soldiers, led to the long, carpeted hallway that opened to the throne room. There the king sat upon his throne, resplendent in star-stitched robes, with all the dignity of Father Christmas.

"Great! When grown ups say 'we'll see about that', it always means yes!" The little boy jumped up off the king's lap, then skipped away, outside into the queue of people waiting their turn to make a wish. 

Resentfully, King Magnifico raised his sceptre, then granted the boy’s wishes with a sweeping shimmer, since he had no heart to disappoint him. 

As the boy disappeared, someone else stepped forward, shoulders slumped in sorrow. “My king,” said a peasant girl, coming up to the throne, clutching a shawl around herself. “My mother twisted her ankle, and can no longer walk after slipping on one of our chicken's eggs. She’s unable to even stand upright. Will you heal her?”

King Magnifico quickly forgot the previous boy's entitlement, and nodded slowly. "A twisted ankle? That is a serious affliction." 

"It's swollen to the size of the egg she slipped on."

The king raised his scepter, then waved it in an arc, healing the girl's mother at once. “There, her pain is gone now,” he said as the girl’s eyes widened, and a smile spread across her face. She bowed, then turned to leave, and Magnifico remembered briefly why sorcery was a blessing.

But no sooner had the girl disappeared, than through the grand doors strode a middle-aged man with fox-like features and an air of impatience. A long travelling cloak billowed behind him as he marched with a walking stick up to the king, who studied him with a steady gaze.

"Your Majesty," the man began without even a bow, "I come to you with a request. I have heard of your power to grant wishes, and seek your aid."

The king leaned forward. Magnifico possessed an innate desire to help those in need, and often found it difficult to say no, but he grew weary since lately it was becoming clear that a fool who makes a wish often finds that what he desires has consequences. 

"Well, go ahead.” Magnifico waved his hand. “Speak your wish.”

The man’s smile faltered for a moment, but he quickly recovered it, then said without shame, "I wish for absolute power. I desire to command armies, to rule with an iron fist, and to have the loyalty of every citizen."

Magnifico’s eyes narrowed, and his voice grew cold as he replied, “Such a wish speaks to ambition beyond measure. But power without wisdom is a path of which to be wary.”

“Sure, sure.” The peasant stood tall as he pulled a scroll from his cloak. “Now, let me be clear on the terms and conditions of this wish: no action, policy, or decree should be contested or overturned by any other entity. I require immunity from any form of legal or physical retribution. This wish should remain in effect for the duration of my lifetime, and extend to my successors, ensuring that the absolute power granted is maintained beyond my tenure. Once granted, this wish must be irrevocable to any changes or nullifications.”

The king’s gaze grew colder still. “I see,” he said. “You think you can waltz in here and demand absolute power with such brazen terms? Absolute authority is not a game to be played. It must be wielded with responsibility.”

The peasant smirked, and folded his arms. “Oh, please. Save the moralising. We’ve no objection to you as a wizard, you know, but as a king we hate you.”

King Magnifico’s heart rate quickened, but his voice remained even. “You are not just seeking to overthrow me; you are aiming to become a tyrant. Power without limits corrupts, and turns rulers into monsters. I will never allow this kingdom to be weakened by the hunger for control. I hereby decree your banishment. Guards, escort this man out of the palace, and ensure he departs from our borders immediately. Any attempt to defy this order will be met with execution. Let it be known our kingdom will always stand against the darkness of greed. We will remain a land of generosity and justice.”

As the king’s words echoed through the throne room, the guards stepped forward with practised ease. They seized the peasant by the arms, who, despite wriggling like a snake, was no match for their strength. The guards dragged him towards the gates.

“I will not be treated like this!” the man sputtered, flailing his arms. “I demand to speak to someone in charge!”

“I am in charge!” Magnifico banged his fist against his throne’s armrest. But he began to see that by giving gifts freely, even if he sat on the throne, his people wielded the power. He was constrained by the very magic that defined him, having to listen to a thousand such ridiculous requests a day. And most times, his subjects couldn't even get their teeth around the word 'thank you'. 

King Magnifico knew things could not go on this way, and so that night, he asked for the counsel of the person he trusted most to advise him: his dear wife, Amaya, who he called to the top of the tallest tower in his palace.

Finish reading: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61920016

9 months ago

Chapter 11 is up!

Chapter 11 Is Up!
archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

IF YOU HAVEN'T STARTED READING NOW, IT'S JUST GETTING TO THE FUN PART!

Excerpt:

As the meetings became more frequent, the character he had invented started to take on a life of its own. It was no longer just a way to get through the day. He would slip into his green suit, the color of money, and with it, would transform into someone else entirely. His voice would change—louder, more charismatic, filled with a confidence that didn’t quite belong to him. His handshake would be firmer, his smile broader, his laugh just a bit too loud.

Brett, Chet, and Gizette, who had seen the transformation firsthand, started calling him “Greed-ler” behind his back. They found the whole thing hilarious, completely different from the brother they knew. Gizette doodled pictures of Greed-ler on scraps of paper, turning him into a cartoon character with exaggerated features and dollar signs in each eye.

It wasn’t long before Greed-ler became more than just a private joke. The image of the green-suited CEO with a maniacal grin spread throughout the company, and soon, it wasn’t just his siblings drawing cartoons of him. Employees began to share these drawings, and Greed-ler started popping up in more official places—on company newsletters, posters, even merchandise. What began as a role to get through the day turned into the official mascot of Thneeds Inc.

READ THE FULL CHAPTER ON AO3!

This chapter is a little longer because I want to take my time showing how Once-ler's personality devolves. I've also never seen any writing about what an average day at the company would be like. As I go through the whole movie, I want to thoroughly explore every last thing like this for once. There really is more than a novel's worth of potential in this story, if it's given its due.

Also, instead of always making Once-ler doubtful about his family's selfishness, I wanted it to be clear he was joining in with them and being an equally terrible or worse person. This is key to making the story work and have a more powerful lesson.


Tags
9 months ago

A lifechanging thing to point out

Just in case nobody realized this, you can download the Read Aloud app, and listen to fanfiction or stories while working on drawing. Or you can render text with Balabolka and put music in the background with a video editor, upload as a private video and enjoy it on a walk. Don't forget a speed up extension to get through things extra efficiently. You can even purchase a higher quality robot voice if you do this a lot. You're welcome. Remember, taking advantage of technology is a form of being more literate.


Tags
8 months ago

Chapter 13 is up! (Millionth Thneed Party)

Chapter 13 Is Up! (Millionth Thneed Party)
archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

The millionth Thneed party was another beat that would've been interesting to focus on if the movie didn't waste time on Ted. I can't believe there are only a few more chapters left to post now!

Excerpt:

There was another orange flash. Now he was sure he'd seen it. The Lorax was throwing a fit. "Close the drapes on all the windows." He stopped a servant. "It's taking away from the show on the ceiling."

While he'd been lost in thought, Once-ler's Ma was busy orchestrating the next highlight of the evening. She had insisted on this, claiming it would add a touch of whimsy to the grand event.

"Laaaaaadies aaaaaand geeeeeentlemen!" her loud voice boomed through a microphone, cutting through the chatter as the music fizzled out. "May I have your attention, please!"

Faces turned towards the menagerie that she stood in front of, wearing a pink, fluffy gown and beaming with pride. Behind her, in a large glass tank, were more humming-fish. Their scales gave way to multicolored sheens under the bright lights, but they were clustered towards the back of the tank, their large eyes darting around the room.

"We have a special treat for you tonight," she went on. "Tonight these little beauties--straight from the heart of the forest--are going to serenade us with a grand song!"

Polite applause rippled through the audience, though many guests still appeared more interested in their conversations and cocktails. Once-ler's Ma signaled to a technician, who turned a dial on the sound system. Soft, enchanting music began to play, and the humming-fishes' voices were, one by one, slowly drawn into the tune with quavering but rich intonations.

Air fol-la-lull derry dum toor-a-lie-ay

Rrye-dum diddledum darruhdum

Troll, fol-de- roll, troll, fol-de- roll

The haunting sound filled the room, with echoes that could only be described as capturing the very essence of the valley. In less than ten seconds, the previously bored faces had all turned towards the tank, conversation dying on their lips.

Oh--Oo--Oh--Oo--Oh--Oo

Oloho, oloho, oloho, oloho

Whack whack, lady lady lie

The music sounded like the wind through the trees, the ripple of water, and birdsong mixed together with something else that was ancient and indescribable.

Once-ler knew from being a musician how hard it was to get people to pay attention to even his most beautiful songs, and animals usually flat out ran away. Barn cats dived for cover, mules twitched their ears in irritation, and birds flew off--to ordinary animals, even man's most sophisticated music held no appeal. However, when the fish started their underwater opera, the world itself paused to listen with rapt attention.

All other noise stopped, including the ticking of clocks and background noise of the river. The air was respectfully still, and the stars outside the window could be seen ceasing to twinkle with baited breath just before the servant closed the curtains.

Only then did Once-ler realize, as a shiver crept down his spine and tears slid unprompted down his face, that the world had never been deaf--it simply needed to hear a performance in the right key. A key that one could only hit, apparently, if they were a particular type of fish.

"Isn't it just marvelous?" his Ma cooed into the microphone when there was a break in the rhythm, and the crowd clapped. "Aren't they just the most delightful little creatures?"

Once-ler frowned. Something about the song had changed, and the spell was breaking. The fishes' voices were wavering as their eyes dilated at the thunderous applause. He could see they were in distress, but his Ma was oblivious, giving the aquarium a little shake to jolt them back into song. She turned to the crowd again, encouraging them to applaud louder.

The guests whistled and shouted for more. The humming-fish were gasping now, turning a grayish hue. Their notes came out in rasping croaks:

Air... air... loll-dee-daa

Yay-dee, lay-dee... oh...

Ahhhh!

Once-ler stepped forward, but his Ma shot him a sharp look.

Before he could do anything else, the lights flickered, and the temperature dropped with an icy blast. The guests glanced around, crying out as some of them dropped their drinks. The music from the speakers warbled and then cut out entirely, leaving silence in its wake.

After a moment of stunned confusion, a glaring orange glow filled the ballroom. The humming-fish stopped any painful attempt to sing, raising their eyes to the spector. The silhouette of the Truffula Valley's guardian materialized in the center of the room, shimmering with bright light.

Once-ler's Ma dropped the microphone, and bumped into the tank as she jerked back. The crowd gasped and looked around, unsure of what was happening.

The guardian's saw-dusty voice rang out, mightier than the rush of the river. "You've gone too far, Once-ler, it's clear. Now greed is going to bring you to tears. You've shown no regard for the lives you’ve disrupted. You've taken nature's beauty for something corrupted. You've taken the wonder for your own gain. Now you will suffer consequences and pain!"

The ghostly Lorax's eyes locked onto Once-ler’s as he stood paralyzed with guilt and fear. "Greed has brought you to this moment. It's time to face your mistake and own it."

As the orange phantom raised its hands, the glass tank holding the humming-fish shattered, and water poured out and soaking the ballroom floor. The grand fountain began to tremble and crack, and the ornate structure burst apart, sending a torrent of water to flood the room.

Guests screamed and scrambled to escape the rising water. Norma's curly hair was drenched and straightened. Mcbean dived under a table, only to be washed out again with his cigar put out. Once-ler stumbled, trying to regain his footing as the water surged around him, suddenly waist high. The Lorax's voice boomed above the chaos with a final damnation: "Your greed will drown you in the end! As the river should have before this happened!"

With that, the ghostly spirit vanished, leaving the ballroom in disarray. There was a loud CRACK and Once-ler fell backwards into the water.

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whatiwishfanfiction - Quality novelizations of your favorite fandoms
Quality novelizations of your favorite fandoms

Just two writers who like to rewrite stories either to make them better or for an experiment.

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