Schrödinger Didn't Have A Cat, He Was The Cat

reblog if ur a cryptid gen z-millennial like me (born between 1994-2003)

EA (Sports, to the game)

Remove the first and last letter of your name. Let’s see how cool is your new name.

Ranci.

Reblog if you utterly and without hesitation support gay rights

It’ll mean a lot to my friend, who’s having a tough time with bullies lately.

Damn, y'all really out here recreating The Crucible 400 years later, huh?

the world was severely lacking weird little girl memes so i had to fill the void

I thought the third one read "Because you're about to be dead." Idk how I added a word

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m working there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates appropriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

Anytime I play a game like that, say Skyrim, I always thought that the animal just ate the gold because they thought it was food. If it was big like a frostbite spider or bear I thought they had random stuff because it’s what a person had on them when the animal ate them

weirdest thing about videogames is finding new clothing/armor for your character on dead NPCs like “its such a shame greg died but thank god his pants are just my size”

Why does everyone know Texas? Like, of all the states why that one?

hey if ur not from america get a blank map and just. fucking guess the states

YOU hates terfs

Y’all where’s my damn flowers

A few months ago I mentioned to my friend that she should buy her boyfriend flowers because more men should get flowers from their partner and she did it today and apparently he was shaking from excitement and emotions because he’s never recieved flowers before. So, anyway, get yo man some flowers.