I Spend Most Of My Time Waiting On A Text From You

if the cage is open why am i still trapped.

You sound like such a good dog. Sorry your FP takes so long coming home. Hope they treat you well soon.

Thank u :( barking at u affectionately.

He really just makes my good days worse. I don't know if it's on purpose or if he's just oblivious. I burned myself for him and he doesn't even care. No praise, no degrading, no disappointment. Nothing. It feels like everything I do is all for nowt. I just want him to fucking look at me. He's lucky he doesn't live near me.

You have no idea i can't live without you. You have no idea my whole world revolves around you. Being around you fixes everything. Wish I could be around you all the time so I wouldn't have to pretend.

Slightly glad I don't have any internet connection in the complex whilst on holiday cuz now I don't have to deal with it if he decides not to message me.

i wish things werent so one sided. hes probably not even thinking about me, meanwhile he consumes my every thought

Listening to Glitter Porn's Mind Sick transition to Clown Dreams is an ethereal experience tbh.

Crazy to me that I don't allow myself to be happy (without actively trying) because I'm not supposed to feel human feelings. It's become natural to act like a dog. Something euphoric about that.

Came home from work in such a dog mindset and I had one single drink and it made it so much more intensified… then I sat on the floor and he petted my head… then he gave me belly rubs… then scratched… then kissed… then spat in my mouth… then choked me… then gave me scars… then punched me… basically I got (consensually) abused and I loved it and took it like a boss. (All I actively did was lay down and follow orders (up, roll over, down…..) … maaajor need 2 live like this forever)

Why am I so anxious. He called me good boy after I joined him, then I went to go wash up before bed, and every few seconds I got pangs through my body like I could sense he was saying stuff. Obviously he wasn't. But my head kept saying things like "come back, puppy" "You're not making owner very happy" "very disobedient. You don't want me, do you?" and I had to physically hold myself from getting my phone to check if he was messaging me. I got really scared. I don't like being like this.