FINALLY I FOUND YOU OMG I FORGIR TO LIKE THE POST
FINALLY I FOUND YOU OMG I FORGIR TO LIKE THE POST
The Last Padisarah Pudding, Your Last Straw (Alhaitham x Reader)
An Alhaitham x Reader Enemies to Lovers One-shot
Word count: 4.9k
Summary: You and Alhaitham have been rivals ever since your first year at the Akademiya. But when things go wrong during a mission given to you by the Sages, you start to realize it's more than just a rivalry...
Finally, you’d be able to beat him. For the very first time, you would be able to break your stalemate – you had the upper hand in your personal competition.
For years, you and Alhaitham were pitted against each other by the Akademiya. The two of you were separately tasked with the retrieval of forbidden knowledge, the sages knowingly exploiting the deep rivalry that was first founded during your student years at the Akademiya. They, of course, were always right. Their choice of disciple for this mission was carefully curated from several different options, knowing the rivalry between you and Alhaitham would produce results faster than anything else.
~7 years Ago~
“Sage Salazar’s tests are notorious for the abysmal pass rate, don’t worry.” One of your classmates consoled another, their words mixing in with several disappointed and distressed conversations.
“What am I going to do, I’ll be expelled if I fail one more time!” Another upset student lamented.
“You can always switch to another Darshan, it’s only our first year so there’s still time.” Someone behind you murmured to a fellow classmate. “I’ve heard that Amurta has better professors.”
You sat back in your chair, smug. Of course, you were the best student in the class. You looked down at the tome before you. As a part of the test, you had to fill the entire book with thorough analysis on the professor’s chosen topic. You flipped the front cover open, admiring what was written in large red letters on the front page.
‘99’.
You were so close to perfection, you could nearly taste it. One more point and you’d have a perfect score. All your sleepless nights in the library were well worth the feeling of euphoria that overcame you today. You were such a rising star that you were certain you’d become a Sage in the future.
“I take it you did well?” A voice came from beside you. It was your classmate, and you recognzied him during some of the lengthy lectures when you would spot him in the back of the class, feet propped up on a bench, his nose in a book. There was no way he could pass Salazar’s rigorous exams if he couldn’t even pay attention in class. You smirked, turning towards your classmate – you recalled his name was Alhaitham.
“Yeah,” You nodded, giving him a nod as a smug expression began to grow across your face. "I got a 99.”
“That’s good,” Alhaitham nodded. “It means at least I’ll see you next year in the top class.”
“Oh, really?” You questioned, surprised that he even managed to pass, let alone gain a score that would allow him to join the top class. “What did you get?”
“100.”
You gawked. “W-woah, that’s great!” You sputtered, unsure how to react to someone who managed to get a perfect score on the most difficult test in a class he didn’t even pay attention to. “We basically got the same score, well done!”
“No,” Alhaitham responded bluntly, his curt tone taking you aback. “You got a 99 because that was all you could get. I got 100 because that was all there was to get.
“You…” your brows pinched together as your sentence trailed off. You were in complete shock that he could say something so rude when you had worked so hard for what you had.
Crossing your arms over your chest, you turned in your seat away from him. You didn’t know what hurt more – his tone, or the truth to what he was saying – but you knew for a fact you immediately despised him.
~~~
Ever since your first encounter with your overly-rational classmate, you were stern rivals – if anyone so much as mentioned the name ‘Alhaitham’ in your presence, you would bristle with anger and resentment. Somehow, the silver-haired student knew exactly what to do in order to push your buttons.
You stood in line at the busy food stall inside the Akademiya. You had just spent several hours in the library studying, and were absolutely famished. You always ordered the same thing from this place, and enjoyed your mid-afternoon snack that kept you going through hours of pushing your brain to its limits.
“What do you mean, there’s no more Padisarah Pudding?” You questioned, your brows furrowed and eyes wide in disbelief.
“I’m sorry, we just sold our last one a couple of minutes ago.” The attendant behind the counter responded apologetically, “Is there anything else you might like?”
“N-no, i’ll just have some tea, thanks.”
The attendant handed you the cup of tea, and you mumbled your thanks as you turned away dejectedly. You supposed you could go down to the city for some of your favorite snack, but that would take up precious time you could be studying instead.
Resigning yourself to sit and drink your tea, you walked over to the dining area only to spot Alhaitham at one of the tables – and in front of him sat not one, but two Padisarah Puddings.
“Why, you!” Brimming with anger, you narrowed your eyes at the silver-haired classmate.
“Hm?” Alhaitham mumbled, not even bothering to look up from the book he was reading.
“Why do you have two puddings?”
“I was feeling particularly hungry today.”
Your eye twitched from his sheer audacity. Both of you were well aware that this was your snack of choice, and Alhaitham bought two merely to get on your nerves. Knowing his intention, you decided to bite back with your own remarks.
“Oh, I forgot how much you need to fuel those ridiculous man muscles.” You scoffed, “But make sure you count your macros correctly, because I have a feeling the extra Padisarah Pudding might throw them off a little.”
Out of the corner of your eye you spotted Alhaitham’s eyebrow twitching. He finally looked up from his book, narrowing his eyes at you.
“Perhaps you should watch yours too.” Alhaitham spoke poignantly. “They shouldn’t be an everyday snack, after all. Perhaps that’s why your fitness scores are the worst out of all your grades?”
Despite wanting to wrap your hands around his neck and throttle him right then and there, you turned around and began to calmly walk away – it was the best you could do to still seem like the better person. It took all your restraint in order to not snap and say something stupid and hateful. You made it all the way back to the library, to your seat at your desk, and immediately slammed your forehead into your open book.
“Damn you Alhaitham!” You groaned, wishing you could live your life peacefully without him.
~1 year ago~
There was nothing you hated more than the day you finally graduated from the Akademiya. Students from all six Darshans were gathered in the main hall, dressed in formal robes. You, as the Salutorian of your graduating class, were offered the chance to give a small speech. Of course, you were delighted to – if only Alhaitham weren’t the Valedictorian.
He followed up your speech with one that would haunt your dreams for years.
“Firstly, I would like to thank the Akademiya for allowing me to learn and thrive here.” He spoke, his overly courteous tone obviously fake to you, forcing you to roll your eyes. “It has been a delightful six years of study, where I’ve been able to research subjects I could only dream of beforehand. My success in my studies aren’t solely down to my own effort... I would like to thank Y/N Y/L/N for always being there to encourage me and motivate me to do better.”
You gawked at the classmate you hated – both of you hated each other. As Alhaitham continued his speech, you could hear whispers among the other students from where you sat in the crowd.
‘I do see them together quite often’
‘Are they in a relationship?’
‘That’s so sweet,’
‘I thought they were always fighting?’
‘Sounds like couples fights’
Your body began to shake with anger, and your face turned bright red as you stared daggers into your most dreaded rival. The whispers among the people surrounding you only fueled your hatred for the silver-haired student even more. Alhaitham met your gaze as he continued his speech, his expression completely unreadable while you glared at him in return.
“Hey, Y/N, I thought you hated Alhaitham?” A classmate sitting next to you leaned over and whispered into your ear.
“I hate him more than anything.” You muttered, despite the ferocious blush that stained your face. “I wish I could murder him right now.”
~Current Day~
Alhaitham thought this would simply be another boring mission given to him by the sages. Although the prospect of being able to use the knowledge capsule he retrieved for the Akedemiya, he would much rather be deep in the pages of another book while enjoying the seabreeze by Port Ormos. As scribe for Haravatat, he was often given boring missions that he could complete quickly, spending the rest of his allocated time relaxing and reading.
That was, until he spotted you walking around talking to locals. If this were any other occasion, he would probably approach you with something embarassing and humiliating in order to entertain himself, but this time you were dressed in student’s robes.
He immediately knew something was off – you, an Alchemist for the Akedemiya, who had graduated years ago, were walking around pretending to be a student on break. It was often that students would come to Port Ormos around this time of year to relax and unwind, and you were most certainly using this fact as some sort of ruse or disguise.
He decided to get up and move to a different location to read his book, picking one that was within earshot of you but out of your sight, trying to figure out just what you were up to.
“Dori, you say?”
“Most certainly. If you give her the right price and earn her trust, she’ll deliver anything.”
“Even information on a certain Knowledge Capsule?”
“Yes.”
Immediately, Alhaitham stiffened, realizing you were also here for a knowledge capsule, undoubtedly also sent by the Akademiya. He smirked, realizing this was yet another chance to beat you.
~~~
You had finally found the location where Dori, a merchant dealing in knowledge capsules, would meet prospective customers – a quiet courtyard outside a sleepy tavern at the edge of the city. You were there just before sunset, at your agreed meeting time, but there was no sign of the financially-motivated merchant.
You checked the small timepiece before tucking it back into your pocket, anxious to find leads and produce results for the Sages. The air was also beginning to get chilly; you were eager to get back indoors and eat a hot meal.
However, the last thing you expected was to hear a voice that haunted your studies at the Akademiya and your early years of your professional career.
“You won’t be able to find leads on the auspicious knowledge capsule this easily,” Your stomach twisted into a knot at the words you heard.
Of course, it was Alhaitham you came face-to-face with once you turned around. Your lips pulled into a terse frown, your eyebrow twitching with anger as the pieces fell together.
“You’re the reason why Dori is a no-show.” You growled, pointing a finger accusatively at your rival.
“She seems to not be very fond of me,” Alhaitham deadpanned, giving a nonchalant shrug. “I propose you find a proxy, or simply think of a more creative way of finding it before me. Although, I doubt you will.”
“Watch it, asshole.” You spat, “One way or another, I will beat you.”
Your face burning hot with anger, you stormed away from the courtyard. You no longer felt the chill of the evening – the fury pumping in your veins was more than enough to keep you warm.
~~~
After years of agonizing rivalry, when you discovered the scribe Alhaitham was searching for the same forbidden knowledge capsule as you were, you thought you must have done something to anger the gods in a previous life. The mere concept of him retrieving the knowledge capsule before you made your blood boil – there was no way you would ever let that happen.
Once you discovered you both were vying for the same mysterious object, you immediately threw your effort into overtime. Thus, you worked endlessly, even resorting to underhanded methods to obtain such an item. You even contacted a certain suspicious doctor, one who had been expelled from the Akedemiya, and was associated with the shady Snezhnayan organization known as the Fatui – one who was once known as Zandik.
“It’s about time for me to return to my Alma Mater.” Il Dottore sneered, his tone sending chills down your spine. “I’ll supplement your search for this knowledge capsule, in return for aid in bartering for my ownership of it once you return it to the sages.”
Those words echoed in your head, and despite knowing the Doctor was far too dangerous and underhanded, you still took his advice and used the device he had given you. It was a knowledge compass, a small metallic clock whose hands oriented to point towards high concentrations of knowledge. According to the Doctor, it was one of his latest inventions, and he was willing to lend it out to you if he could have the knowledge capsule you found using it.
And thus you found yourself at Port Ormos, wandering the streets disguised as a young child. The cloak around you hid your adult features, and you walked with light steps to mimic children in the street and avoid the attention of townsfolk who passed by.
Staring down at the compass, you watched as the handle flickered from left to right. In the back of your head, you had uneasy thoughts that you’d pay for taking the easy way out later.
Suddenly, the handle snapped towards one direction, firmly focused on some sort of mysterious power. You came to a complete stop, realizing you were right before a small alley. You were about to enter it when you heard hushed voices prickle at the tips of your ears.
“One million mora. Take it or leave it.”
“No way, this isn’t even guaranteed to be the real thing. I would much rather go through a more reliable channel, like Dori.”
“It’s your loss, then. I can guarantee you, this is the real auspicious knowledge capsule. You have no clue how many people are trying to get their hands on it.”
At those words, you knew it was the right knowledge capsule. You tucked the compass away, shrugging your shoulders as you tried to put on your best childlike impression.
“Have you seen my mom?” You stepped into the alley and asked in a baby-like voice, your head facing the ground.
“What the hell?” One of the people in the alley exclaimed at your sudden appearance in front of them.
You flashed forwards, snatching the glowing capsule before scaling the wall and disappearing over the rooftops. You jumped across several houses before disappearing into a knoll in the giant tree trunk that towered over the city. You might have mediocre strength compared to most of the skilled Academics, but you could move fast for short periods of time.
The three men you had just stolen the knowledge capsule from were hot on your tail, but you quickly ditched the disguise and returned to your normal appearance. With the capsule carefully tucked away in your pocket, you walked nonchalantly through the port. The men rushed past you, racing through the streets in search of a small child – not a lazy student who looked like they wanted to kick back and relax after their final exams.
“Where the hell is that kid?!” You heard one of them shout. You did your best to hide your smirk, slowly making your way towards the city gates to head back to Dottore’s lab.
What you didn’t notice, however, was the glint of silver hair that poked out from behind a stack of crates – Alhaitham looked up from his book at your retreating figure, realizing you had finally gotten your hands on what he wanted.
He knew reporting your collaboration with the Fatui to the sages would only result in you reporting his shady actions in return, so instead of following the rules, he chose to shut the book he was in the middle of reading and see where exactly you were headed. After all, it seemed like you had made progress – and Alhaitham couldn’t stand to see you pulling ahead in the game.
He always loved to piss you off. He could tell by the look on your face when when you were cursing at him internally. He loved how satisfying it was to beat you; you were always someone who did everything in their power to be the best, and it felt so much better to beat you when compared to beating any other academic he had the displeasure of getitng to know.
Relishing the idea of spying on you to figure out how he can outsmart you once again, Alhaitham began to slowly walk towards your direction.
~~~
“Doctor, I’ve brought back the compass.” You bowed in front of the green-haired man, extending one arm as you held out the intricate device.
“Thank you,” Dottore reached out, his gloved fingers tracing along your forearm before reaching the palm of your hand where the compass rested.
You shivered at the way he unnecessarily touched you, wondering why he felt the need to do that.
“I presume you’ve already found the auspicious knowledge capsule,” Dottore smirked, although you couldn’t read his expression through the mask he wore.
“Y-yes, I’ve brought it to the sages already. We can-”
“Ah- ah- ah,” Dottore cut you off, shaking his head as he spoke. “I believe you still have it on yourself.”
Unbeknownst to either of you, Alhaitham was hidden away behind some of Dottore’s strange machinery that he had strewn aside from one of his projects he had abandoned. He listened in on your conversation, realizing exactly who you had made a deal with – and just how deep you had gotten yourself into trouble.
Your eyes widened with fear, realizing Dottore could see through your facade. He was correct – you had gone straight from Port Ormos to Dottore’s laboratory, with no intention of giving it back to the Sages just yet. This knowledge capsule seemed different – it glowed white instead of green. The contents of the capsule were kept vague, nobody seeming to have any idea as to what could be inside of it. You actually wanted to study the capsule more than anything, hoping that you could make some sort of incredible discovery that Alhaitham could never beat.
“I’m sorry,” You immediately shifted gears, understanding what kind of person you were talking to – if the rumors were anything to go by, he was one of the most terrifying people in the world – if he was still a person at all. You should have known that he would have incredible senses, and would be able to tell you still had the capsule on you.
“That’s okay,” Dottore stepped closer to you, his shadow completely swallowing you as he towered above your height. “After all, you’ve done everything I’ve asked for. How could I complain about a little lie?”
You began to cower with fear, realizing that nobody knew where you were right now. If Dottore ended up doing something to you, nobody would ever know. With a cold gloved hand, the Doctor reached out and cupped your cheek. With the other, he slid his hand down your side, his fingers slipping into your pocket to pull out the glowing capsule.
Your lips quivered as you watched Dottore marvel at the knowledge capsule you had essentially delivered to him on a silver platter.
“After all, you’ll be my first subject to test its contents on.”
Your heart dropped like a rock into your stomach at the realization that Dottore had no intention of letting you leave. You immediately tried to escape, but his hand on your cheek instantly slipped around your neck, lifting you off of the ground as you flailed. Your hands immediately went up to wrench at his unyielding grip. It was like a ring of metal was locked around your neck – his hand simply wouldn’t budge. Your feet swung beneath you, your toes pointing as you tried desperately to find any solid ground to stand on.
“I’ll feed you the knowledge bit by bit, and see how much you can tolerate before you go insane.”
Alhaitham peered around the side of the machinery that hid his presence, witnessing the Doctor engrossed with you as he vocalized how he wanted to experiment on you. His sickening words settled uncomfortably in Alhaitham’s stomach, making the Scribe feel anger and fear that he hadn’t ever felt before.
‘What?’ Your mind reeled at Dottore’s announcement, somehow able to make logical connections despite the stress of the situation. ‘Knowledge capsules should be easily digestible instant knowledge! Could it be, that it’s this highly prioritized by the Sages for a reason, and it’s because humans can’t tolerate it?’
Let’s start with… two percent.” Dottore sneered, and you couldn’t say anything in protest as he cut off your airway.
You writhed more and more desperately as he raised the capsule towards your face, its colorless luminance enveloping your entire vision.
This just might be it. Your rivalry with Alhaitham might have finally gone too far.
You began to close your eyes, your body falling still as you gave up on trying to escape.
Alhaitham couldn’t stand it anymore, he couldn’t bear to watch you get hurt; Dottore was going to drive you mad with his experiments, or worse – kill you. He moved with breakneck speed as he slashed the inhuman Doctor’s arm clean off, rescuing you from certain doom.
A loud crash resounded through the laboratory as you found yourself flying across the room, landing in the arms of someone strong and warm. The white light was gone, and you blinked as your eyes adjusted to see Alhaitham hovering above you.
“WHAT!” The doctor exclaimed, and you realized his voice was now suddenly far away. You glanced in the direction of the voice to see Dottore standing on the other side of the room, missing one arm. Sparks were coming out of the stump that his arm once was, a telling sign that his body was actually part robot. Dottore’s other arm was frozen in the air, still holding onto the glowing capsule, and it seemed like he had some sort of process malfunction.
Alhaitham had carried you across the room to set you down. You felt his warm hands around your neck, and watched as his arms flexed and his shoulders strained. Suddenly you heard a snap and you could breathe again, the metallic fingers of Dottore’s robotic arm finally broken away from your throat. You gasped for air, sitting up on your own as you were finally free from the Doctor’s clutches.
“When will you realize I’m just better?” He smirked, helping you up.
“Shut up,” you rolled your eyes. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Not without the capsule.” Alhaitham spoke, running back towards Il Dottore. The robot seemed to still be malfunctioning as it didn’t react in any way to the scribe’s approach.
Alhaitham snatched the capsule from its hand, quickly returning to where you were still sitting recovering from nearly being strangled and illegal-knowledged to death.
You tried to scramble to your feet, but you stumbled. You were caught by an arm roughly hooking around your waist, lifting you off of the ground and racing out of the laboratory.
“Hey! Put me down!” You exclaimed, kicking in protest to the uncomfortable and embarrassing way you were being carried.
“Fine, fine.” Alhaitham relented, “I suppose we’ve fled far enough away now.”
He set you down on the ground gently, and you were finally able to find your balance and climb to your feet.
“That was incredibly dangerous.” Alhaitham warned. “Both of us aren’t afraid of underhanded methods of achieving our goals… but the Doctor is simply far too dangerous. You were incredibly lucky I happened to be nearby, otherwise you might have become a test subject for a mad scientist.”
“I did what I had to.” You crossed your arms as you turned away, scoffing.
“There were several far less dangerous methods you could have used… but thankfully we won’t be returning to the sages empty-handed, since I managed to get the knowledge capsule in the end.”
He withdrew the glowing capsule from his pocket, holding it in the air to examine it. It was at that point that you realized he had won yet again. Not only did he save you from certain doom at the hands of a mad scientist, but he also had possession of the capsule that you nearly died in order to obtain.
“Why, you!” Anger suddenly filled you to the brim once again – but this time it overflowed freely. You lunged towards your rival, hands wrapping around his throat as you tackled him to the ground.
Alhaitham was so taken aback by your sudden violence that you had actually caught him off-guard. His balance faltered and you managed to knock him backwards. He fell onto the soft grass, but his reflexes were far better than yours as he quickly rolled so that you were now beneath him. You looked furious – but he always loved it when you looked that way.
“Damn you, bastard!” You writhed beneath him, unable to escape the cage he had made around you with his arms. Tears prickled at the corners of your eyes; this was the last straw. Time and time again, he had bested you while barely breaking a sweat, and you couldn’t take it anymore.
“Why does beating you feel better than anything else in the world?” Alhaitham smirked as he stared down at you, his face hovering mere inches above yours.
You wriggled your arm free, about to land a punch on his smug face, when you felt something soft pressing harshly down on your lips. It was warm, soft – you suddenly realized Alhaitham was kissing you.
Despite how much he pressed your buttons and made you curse his existence, something drew you to kiss back – and it ignited a fire in your stomach. Instead of throwing a punch at Alhaitham, your free arm began to snake behind his neck, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. He began to lower his body, pressing his chest flush with yours to the point where you could feel the heat radiating off of him.
You let out a soft groan as he slid one knee between your thighs, hooking your legs down and trapping you in the kiss. His fingers raked through your hair, and Alhaitham knew your hair always looked nice but he didn’t realize just how soft it was now that he could finally touch it.
Alhaitham pulled away, watching you pant as your face burned bright red. Your lips were slightly swollen from the kiss, drawing his gaze to them, and making him want to kiss you even more.
Your eyes raked down Alhaitham’s body as he hovered above you, and you burned with humiliation inside. You hated the way he made you feel – he always got on your nerves as if he knew exactly what to do and say in order to piss you off.
“Why is it always like this?” You sighed, gazing into his jade green eyes. Your silver-haired rival merely smirked.
“Even in the Akademiya, you were always too reckless.” Alhaitham responded. “Always too eager to be the best, as if you’d ever be able to beat me.”
“I hate you.” You mumbled, “The way you always beat me at everything so effortlessly, the look in your eyes when you put on that impudent smirk, how you know exactly what pisses me off the most. Why do you hate me so much?”
Alhaitham’s breath fell still at your accusations; he never realized the things he did made you think he hated you.
“I never hated you.” He responded bluntly, causing you to freeze beneath him.
“Y-you… what?” You stuttered, your blush deepening at the realization your hatred was one-sided. You were at a loss for words, and only managed to stare back up at Alhaitham.
“You’re redder than a tomato.” Alhaitham stated bluntly.
“Hey!” You quickly became angry again, embarrassed at how flustered he had easily made you – and how he had effortlessly kissed you, something that nobody before ever had the privilege of doing. You were always far too invested in your academic career to ever focus on romance or relationships. The kiss gave you a realization, awakening feelings for him that you had no clue ever even existed before this. However, the way Alhaitham immediately switched back to teasing you made you forget all of these feelings temporarily.
“First you stole my knowledge capsule, and now you’ve stolen my first kiss too! I can’t deal with this anymore!”
“You’re just trying to deny you liked it.”
Once again, he was completely right.
“Fuck you, Alhaitham!” You lunged forwards, wrapping your hands around his neck once again. This time, however, Alhaitham let you push him backwards into the grass. The faintest smile was on his lips as he fell, staring up at your face. Your anger somehow faded into laughter as you tackled him to the ground. You were still angry with him, of course, but for some reason he had become slightly more tolerable.
~~~
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how not to romance a guy 101
pairing: Xiao x gn!reader
genre: modern college au, fluff, crack, smau
summary: You just found out that there was this extremely attractive guy in your chem class, and what was your first thought? “Is he single?” Since then, you’ve made it your mission to try and romance him before someone else wins him over. However, the problem was, you have no love life at all! But seriously, how hard can it be to win someone over? This is how not to romance a guy 101
status: ongoing [4 Feb 23 - ??]
author’s note: putting this out here first, will only start once i finish my aether smau. like bro, how can i not write a smau about my husband 🤨??/j anyways, i decided to make this smau gender neutral so that all the simps can enjoy this lol xiao so babygirl fr
profiles: XO crew | Chase Atlanters
taglist: open — send an ask/dm to be added :)
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Plan # 1
➸ 00: who’s that cute guy ✎
⌫ Step 1: Get his number
➸ 01: like a k-drama scene
➸ 02: he’s in my chem class???
➸ 03: chickened out ✎
➸ 04: in my stalker era
➸ 05: you’re saying he’s not a model??!?
➸ 06: the plan
➸ 07: check your dms
⌫ Step 2: Text him
➸ 08: osmanthus wine tastes the same as i remember
➸ 09: hey (with rizz) ✎
➸ 10: 21 questions | 10.5: be my valentine?
➸ 11: don’t be so cold
➸ 12: i promise i’m not a scammer ✎
➸ 13: help pls | 13.5: when he’s good at science AND math >>>
➸ 14: partners? fuck yeah! ✎
Added— ⌫ Step 2.5: Hangout with him
➸ 15: meetup (date)
➸ 16: you smell like qingxin flowers ✎
➸ 17: stop procrastinating
➸ 18: my treat
➸ 19: want to be cat parents? ✎ | 19.5: oh. ✎
➸ 20: are you free tonight
➸ 21: still hung up on her? ✎
⌫ Step 3: Give him almond tofu
➸ 22: -
➸ 23: -
➸ 24: -
➸ 25: -
➸ 26: -
➸ 27: -
➸ 28: -
⌫ Step 4: Ask him out
➸ 29: tba
The Prefect's Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Rulebook
summary: After yet another rule violation by Grim, Riddle hands you a comprehensive guide to Heartslabyul’s regulations expecting you to finally learn and teach Grim. Instead, you retaliate by writing your own unofficial rulebook about Riddle himself, filled with exaggerated (but surprisingly accurate) observations. He inevitably gets his hands on the book. Riddle is left flustered and scandalized, especially with the last rule.
pairing: riddle rosehearts x gn!reader
warning: secondhand embarrassment experience.
word count: 2.4k
i had so much fun writing this. probably one of my favourite fics i have written. it's fun to write about my beloved riddle <3
It all started with a tart. Or rather, the lack of one.
You and Grim stood in the lounge, both of you equal parts guilty and unapologetic. Well, you were mostly guilty by association, considering it was Grim who had eaten one of Trey’s tarts without permission, but in Riddle’s eyes, you were both responsible.
"Grim," you sighed, standing before Riddle Rosehearts with his face red, arms crossed, eyes burning with irritation. "What do you have to say for yourself?"
Grim, hiding behind you, peeked out from behind your legs, ears twitching. "I regret nothing," he declared. "That tart was mine!"
"It most certainly was not!" Riddle snapped, his voice sharp. "That was my tart, specifically prepared for me. And not only did you eat it, but you also violated Rule #89 ‘Never eat a tart without the Queen's permission’, and Rule #27 ‘Do not break into the dormitory kitchens after hours’ and Rule #53–"
Grim huffed. "Ya make it sound worse than it is."
"You ate the Housewarden’s tart in front of him and ran to me," you muttered, reminding him of his crime. You were surprised that Grim hadn't been collared yet.
"A mistake anyone could make," Grim said stubbornly.
"A mistake that you made," you deadpanned.
Riddle inhaled deeply, clearly exercising a lot of restraint to not collar Grim. Then, he presented you with a book, quite a massive book.
"This," he declared, "is the Heartslabyul Rulebook."
You took it, nearly dropping it due to its weight. No dorm rulebook should be this heavy, you thought. "This thing could kill a man."
Grim peeked at it over your shoulder and immediately recoiled. "Ugh! Words! Too many words!"
"That is exactly the issue," Riddle snapped at him. "You do not read the rules, and as a result, you break them." Riddle then turned to you, his face no longer red. "As the Ramshackle Prefect, I expect you to look after your dorm members. Therefore, I expect you to read this book in its entirety and teach Grim to behave himself in my dorm."
You blinked at him. This seemed hardly fair. Why did you have to be punished?
You opened the book to have a look.
Rule #1: Always respect the Queen’s Decrees.
You promptly closed it.
"Yeah, I’m not doing that," you said.
Riddle frowned.
At first, you did try to read the rulebook, but between all your other work, assignments, and the endless errands you had to run, it simply wasn’t feasible. Not to mention how utterly ridiculous some of the rules were.
So instead of reading his rulebook, you wrote your own. For fun.
Grim was pleased with the outcome.
It had started as a joke, something to vent your many grievances about the amount of rules in Heartslabyul, but you quickly realized something: your rulebook wasn’t about Heartslabyul.
It was about Riddle, which Grim had helpfully pointed out.
"Myahaha! Look at this one! ‘Rule #23 – Riddle can and will recite the rules you broke.’ That one's good! Let me add some too!"
And so, The Prefect’s Unofficial Guide to Riddle Rosehearts was born.
The Prefect’s Unofficial Guide to Riddle Rosehearts
(Compiled by the Ramshackle Prefect, with essential additions and doodles from Grim. Rules may be ignored at your own risk. Side effects include but are not limited to: exasperation, lectures, punishments, and possible collaring.)
Rule #1 – Anything is legal when Riddle has his back turned. (Grim wrote this.)
Rule #2 – Riddle will scold you for running in the halls, even if you are running to avoid being late for a meeting with him. (It was a no-win situation. You’d be scolded for being late or scolded for running. There was no escape.)
Rule #3 – Riddle has a ‘stern nod’ and a ‘very stern nod.’ Learn to tell the difference. (One means ‘I am disappointed in you.’ The other means ‘You will be collared in five seconds.’)
Rule #5 – If Riddle goes silent mid-sentence, he is either (a) so angry he can’t speak, or (b) realizing you have a point but refuses to admit it.
Rule #12 – If you see Trey baking tarts, congratulations! You are in the presence of Heartslabyul’s unofficial MVP. Do not let Riddle (or anyone) see you sneaking one.
Rule #18 – If you notice Riddle's face is turning red, you have exactly three seconds to mentally prepare for whatever comes next.
Rule #23 – Riddle can and will recite the rules you broke.
Rule #28 – If you compliment Riddle out of nowhere, he will malfunction like a broken automaton. (Highly effective distraction technique.)
Rule #31 – If Ace says, 'Housewarden Riddle will never know,' Housewarden Riddle will absolutely find out.
Bonus Section:
Rule #31.1 – If Ace says, 'I have a great idea,' walk away. It is neither 'great' nor 'an idea.'
Rule #31.2 – If you try to hide something from Ace, he will immediately become interested.
Rule #34 – Riddle pretends not to have a sense of humour, but he does. (It’s just deeply buried under layers of responsibility and rule enforcement.)
Rule #38 – Trey has a 70% success rate of calming Riddle down. (Cater has a 50% success rate. Ace and Deuce have a -500% success rate.)
Rule #41 – Riddle secretly likes animals, but will deny this if accused. (He takes good care of the hedgehogs and adores them.)
Rule #53 – If Riddle ever finds out I like him, I am done for.
You weren’t sure why you wrote that last one. It was a joke. Mostly. (It felt easier to admit on paper rather than to say it. It was most definitely not a joke.)
The rulebook remained a harmless source of entertainment between you and Grim. You had your fun, and Grim even doodled in a few pictures of angry Riddle before resorting to drawing himself.
It should have remained a private joke. It really should have. But, of course, nothing involving Grim remained a secret for long.
It was another ordinary evening in Heartslabyul, where you had reluctantly agreed to a study session with Ace and Deuce. The plan was simple: Ace and Deuce would attempt to get their grades up, you would try to prevent them from slacking while trying to study as well, and Grim would… probably not study.
Riddle had allowed you all to use one of the study rooms, though not without a warning about ‘proper conduct.’
You had meant to be careful, really. You had every intention of keeping your very unofficial, very embarrassing rulebook far away from prying eyes. You just hoped nobody looked through your stack of books, among which laid your rulebook you had accidentally brought. Unfortunately, for you, Grim had other plans.
Grim huffed, then pawed through the stack of books on the table. "There’s too many words in here! I wanna read something fun."
"You’ll think studying is fun when you see your test scores improve," Deuce said, diligently copying notes and actually putting in an effort.
"Nyah! Where’s our rulebook? I wanna add another one about Riddle’s scary angry face!"
You immediately froze and, like a shark smelling blood in water, Ace perked up.
"Rulebook?" he echoed. "Wait, wait, wait. Is it another one of Riddle’s? Man, you’re actually reading that thing?"
Deuce actually looked impressed. "That’s really responsible of you, Prefect."
"It’s not the Heartslabyul Rulebook," Grim piped up, completely missing the way you were silently willing him to stop talking. "It’s hench-human’s rulebook! The one ‘bout Riddle!"
A beat of silence.
Then, with alarming speed, Ace lunged for your stack of books before you could even stop him. (Rule #31.2 was being displayed right in front of you.)
"HEY–"
"Hold on, hold on," Ace said, flipping the thin book open. "This is– ooohhh. You wrote an entire guide to our Housewarden? With rules?" He barked out a laugh. "Rule #1: Anything is legal when Riddle has his back turned."
You snatched for the book, but Ace twisted out of reach.
"It was a joke! Give it back!"
Deuce, peeking over Ace’s shoulder, frowned. "I don’t know if this is a good idea–"
"‘Rule #31: If Ace says, Housewarden Riddle will never know, Housewarden Riddle will absolutely find out.’" Ace read. "Hey, what the hell! That’s slander!"
"It’s true!" you snapped.
Ace ignored you, flipping further. "‘Rule #38: Trey has a 70% success rate of calming Riddle down. Cater has a 50% success rate. Ace and Deuce have a -500% success rate.’"
Deuce looked offended. "Hey, why is mine also negative?"
Ace grinned. "Because you’re the one who keeps making it worse by apologizing wrong and getting us caught."
"I– wait. I do not!"
"Stop arguing and give it back–"
"Prefect, Ace, Deuce," came the voice of Riddle Rosehearts from the now open door.
A terrible, horrible, no good, very bad silence followed.
The three of you went completely still, and Grim decided he would hide behind you.
This was the worst possible outcome ever. In Ace's hand was your silly book, in plain sight, and there stood Riddle in the doorway with his brows furrowed. Riddle’s eyes flicked to the book in Ace’s hands. Ace immediately noticed and hid it behind his back, but it was far too late.
"Ace," Riddle said, stepping forward. "What are you hiding?"
"Uh… nothing?" Ace tried, clearly lying.
"Nothing," Riddle repeated flatly. His gaze sharpened. "Ace Trappola, hand it over. Now."
Ace, being Ace, grinned as if he could still salvage the situation. "C’mon, Housewarden. Maybe this is one of those things you're better off not seeing–"
"If you don't hand me the book, it's off with your head!"
Ace immediately caved, sighing. "Alright, alright. Here." He handed over the book, and you had never felt such levels of anxiety in your life. Not even facing overblots made you feel the level of panic you felt now (that was an exaggeration but, still).
Riddle took it, immediately glancing at the cover. Then he flipped open the first page. Then the second. Then the third.
You watched, frozen in place, as Riddle continued reading, his expression shifting between scandalized and exasperated.
Then he was at the last page. You could tell the exact moment he read the 53rd Rule. His face went from normal to red in an instant.
Oh no.
You squeezed your eyes shut for a moment and then opened to meet Riddle's blue-gray ones.
“I see,” Riddle said, his voice carefully even but his face red. "Is this true?"
You considered your options.
Lie. (Too late, he’s already read it.)
Run. (Where? He knows where you live.)
Pray. (The Great Seven can’t save you now.)
You picked option 4. Deflection.
"You were not supposed to read it," you said, your voice steadier than you felt.
"So I gathered," he muttered. He looked at you then glanced at the audience.
"Ace, Deuce and Grim," he said. "I expect a 2000 worded essay about the need of study ettiquette and rules."
Ace groaned. "Aw, c’mon, Housewarden–"
"2500 words," Riddle amended, not even hesitating.
Deuce sighed but nodded, already resigned to his fate. Grim, however, let out a dramatic wail. "But I didn't even do anything!"
"Then you may explain, in 2500 words, why you are a menace to the dorms."
Grim gasped. "Wha– ME?!"
"Now leave," Riddle said, and Ace wasted no time grabbing Grim and Deuce by the collars, dragging them toward the door.
"Good luck, Prefect," Ace called, grinning like a traitor before the door shut behind them.
And then, silence.
You were alone with Riddle. You could hear the pages of the rulebook crinkling slightly under his grip. He wasn’t saying anything. Oh no.
Riddle took a deep breath, and exhaled. His face was still tinged red, and you had no idea if that was a good sign or if you were about to be executed on the spot.
"Why," he finally said, "did you write this?"
You hesitated, rubbing the back of your neck. "It was just a joke. Grim and I wrote it for fun."
"Fun," Riddle echoed, a slight twitch in his brow. "So, you thought it would be fun to create an entire guide about me?"
"When you say it like that, it sounds weird."
"It is weird!"
You winced. Was it Rule #18 red or Rule #5 red? Either way, this was not looking good for you.
(Back in your world, you used to laugh when your friends talked about the embarrassing things they did and noticed about their crushes. You thought it was ridiculous. Now the tables have turned and you feel like you want to throw up.)
"Look," you said, shifting uncomfortably, "I didn’t mean for you to see it. I mean, it’s not like you don’t do all those things–"
Riddle inhaled sharply. "That’s not the point!"
There was another terrible pause. You could feel your soul slowly trying to escape your body.
Then, he huffed, closing the book with a thunk against his palm. "So," he said, eyes locking onto you, "Rule number 53."
Your stomach flipped in a very bad way.
"That one was a joke," you blurted out.
He raised an eyebrow. "Was it?"
You swallowed. "Mostly?"
His lips pressed into a thin line. "Mostly," he repeated. He tapped his fingers against the book, thoughtful. "I find it strange, Prefect. You wrote a rather detailed guide about me, yet you conveniently included that rule."
You remain silent.
"I am asking again. Is it true?"
You opened your mouth. Shut it. Opened it again.
"...Yes."
Riddle stared at the floor. His fingers curled slightly. You silently braced yourself for the rejection. All you had to do was not cry and act as level headed as you could.
Then, after a long pause, he muttered, "I think I should make my own rulebook."
You blinked. "Huh?"
He looked up, red-faced, but determined.
"Rule #1 : If the Prefect likes me, they are not done for."
You felt your face burn. Embarrassment rising up again.
"Rule #2," he continued, flustered, "If the Prefect insists on writing about me, they should expect me to read it and respond accordingly."
You could feel yourself sweat. "Riddle–"
"And Rule #3–"
He hesitated, then turned away, mumbling, "...They should expect me to like them back."
Your heart soared and you almost cried in relief.
Riddle sighed, covering his face. "This is the worst rulebook ever."
But there was a small, shy smile peeking through his embarrassment.
© ladyfocalors
ZAMN BEIDOU
>> your tights are running!
hey! those were expensive!
prompt: they rip your tights
pairing(s): Beidou x reader, Itto x reader, Diluc x reader
cw: literally just making out and like almost sex
notes: gn!reader, nsfw
It had slipped your mind, her love for the skintight hosiery, until you’d arrived at the dock and caught the look in her eyes, trained on your thighs. She was as boisterous and eccentric as usual, however when they set sail and the water was calm, she'd dragged you into her quarters.
It had slipped your mind, her love for the skintight hosiery, until you’d arrived at the dock and caught the look in her eyes, trained on your thighs. She was as boisterous and eccentric as usual, however when they set sail and the water was calm, she'd dragged you into her quarters.
It had slipped your mind, her love for the skintight hosiery, until you’d arrived at the dock and caught the look in her eyes, trained on your thighs. She was as boisterous and eccentric as usual, however when they set sail and the water was calm, she'd dragged you into her quarters.
"Ah... captain... gentle." You mumbled, feeling her teeth graze your throat.
Her thumbs dug into your hips as her pelvis ground against yours, speaking against your skin. “Sorry, sorry, y’just sound so cute when you’re all loud for me, mm?” She laughed at the whine you let out.
Her hands traveled further, rubbing you over your undergarments. When you arched into her though, silently begging for more, she pulled her hands away.
“Captain…” you whined, skin feeling hot under your clothes.
“Shhh… be patient.” She chuckled, laying a kiss on your neck. “Someone’s excited, eh?”
"You're the one who dragged me into your room right when we set sail..." you grumbled.
Her fingers moved idly on your inner thighs. "Are you telling me you're not enjoying it? If that's the case, I could just-"
"No! No, captain, you know what I need..." you swallowed, burying your head in her neck in embarrassment. "Please, captain..."
"Indecisive, are we?" She laughed, giving your thighs a gentle squeeze. "You're lucky I'm a patient captain."
She dragged a fingernail between your legs, before tugging at the garment and tearing it between her fingers.
"Eyes on me, honey."
"Stop looking at me... it's embarrassing." You looked down at your boyfriend, ITTO, whose head was currently between your legs.
“Embarrassed? About what?” He questioned, pushing your thighs apart.
Dense as a rock, as always, he preoccupied himself with trying to figure out your tights, plucking at the material.
"You're..." you grumbled out the last bit incoherently. You yourself didn't really know what you said, but it didn't really matter, when Itto pulled apart the fabric of your tights, rendering your mind blank in surprise. “Itto!”
“What? It’s faster,” he said, shooting you a devilish grin.
Your face flushed with heat, and you swatted his shoulder. “You’re buying me new ones!”
“I’ll rip those too.” He winked at you, burying his face between your thighs.
His hands rested on the outsides of your thighs, supporting them comfortably as you writhed in pleasure for the next few hours. Maybe you’d forgive him this time…
“Mmgh…” you whined against DILUC ‘s lips, feeling his tongue slip between yours.
His hands rested on your body, grabbing and touching wherever they could find. They wandered up your chest, then down your waist, onto your thighs. He was a quiet man, but every few moments, he let a groan slip, rumbling heavy in his chest.
As you separated, you breathed heavily, mumbling, “DILUC, please… need you…”
Something flashed in his eyes, like a switch was flipped, and he turned you around, pinning you to the wall, back to him. You let out a yelp at the suddenness of the action, bracing yourself against the wall with either arm.
“You drive me crazy…” he muttered into your neck, sinking his teeth into your skin.
You gasped at the feeling, heat shooting down your body and into your core. You felt drunk on lust, and barely even registered his hand on your legs, until he grazed there.
“Ah!” You jolted, thighs clamping around his hand.
He retracted his hand, this time plucking around your waistband, then opting to rip it open, after a few seconds of pulling at the hosiery.
“Your choice in clothing is bothersome.”
°୨୧ NO CONTEST
+ kaiser x f!reader | wc 2.8k | content: fluff, friends to lovers, slight hints of jealousy, mentions of alcohol, they go clubbing
notes: help me i think i made myself fall for this guy even more after writing this shit for him > ⤙ <
summary: being just friends doesn’t mean much when neither of you really want to keep it that way. problem is, will either of you make the first move?
SPOTTED: KAISER-KAIA DUO HIT THE STREETS, NEW BUDDING ROMANCE?
“i like you though, y/n.”
it’s spring and the weather outside is the nicest it’s ever been in a while and you have every chance to enjoy it except for the fact that dear michael kaiser is lounging on your couch, rifling through the magazine he got in the mail.
“right, haha, very funny,” you mumble sarcastically, slumping down onto the other couch where kaiser isn’t sprawled all over.
sometimes, you think it’s funny how he’s portrayed as this hot, sexy, confident soccer player who can do no wrong when it comes to matters with his looks, but then in private he’s like… well, this. his bed head’s a mess, his room slippers are the fluffy-fuzzy kind, and much less high maintenance than everyone makes him out to be. (but you have to stop yourself from staring because kaiser doesn’t sleep in anything but his sweatpants during this season and well, where his abs are concerned, he’s definitely got no problems there.)
kaiser sighs in the overdramatic fashion that’s probably his trademark right about now. “y/n, y/n, what do i have to do to make you believe me?” he turns around, smirking at you as he raises a brow. maybe it’ll work on his countless fangirls, but after being friends with him for over six years, you’re probably immune to it.
“maybe you can just shut up and get ready for your event later.” you roll your eyes, sauntering to the kitchen to get yourself some breakfast, automatically making two of everything because kaiser loves to crash your apartment in the morning. (he really does need to learn about personal space.)
breakfast preparations go quietly. kaiser listens to you—he shuts up and starts getting ready for his event before coming back into your apartment, all fresh and ready to shamelessly eat the breakfast you made, staring at you from across the table whenever you’re not looking like he always does.
“kaiser-kaia duo hit the streets, new budding romance?”
“miko, don’t tell me you’re reading that gossip rag too,” you whine, looking for any excuse not to dive into your pile of work for the day.
your colleague swivels her chair over to your cubicle, looking around to make sure your bosses aren’t around to witness the both of you slacking off. “hey, isn’t he your friend? give me the tea! are they really dating?”
leave it to miko to get all excited about dating rumours. you really don’t know what’s so special about them—kaiser’s gotten so many of them ever since, well, forever. even before he became a soccer superstar.
you remember what kaiser said in the morning. “i like you though, y/n.” always ready with that smooth tongue of his. that aside, if he really was dating someone, you bet that they’d be staying over with him more often than not, and there’s really no harm in rejecting a rumor as opposed to confirming one.
“nope, they just happened to be waiting for a cab at the same spot.” and paparazzis love to snap a shot from misleading angles. now that you’re really looking at the article, they managed to make it look like kaiser’s kissing her cheek. you find yourself rolling your eyes at it and looking away.
miko sighs, leaning back against her chair. “man, that sucks, they look cute,” she comments, scrolling away from the online article before she gives you a suspicious side eye. “hey, you sure you’re not dating him?”
you still a little at the sudden line of questioning before turning your attention back to your laptop equally quickly. “if i was, i wouldn’t be so free all the time now, would i?” a response to which miko shrugs off and decides to let go of as she retreats back to her desk.
as much as you love miko as your colleague, you haven’t been as honest with her as you could. she knows you’re friends with kaiser, yeah, but she doesn’t know he’s basically your neighbour. she doesn’t know that he comes over all the time whenever it’s off season. she doesn’t know that the both of you have fallen asleep next to each other on the couch.
she doesn’t know a lot of things—like how your heart’s beating erratically now at the notion of being someone special to kaiser. it’s always been sweet nothings that you thought would stay that way, and you’ve always been short at realising your own feelings, so much so you were, once upon a time, positive you had zero romantic feelings for your friend.
now? you’re not so sure anymore.
seven days pass and kaiser’s been pestering you every single moment you’re free—like he always does—but today’s kind of a special day because it’s your birthday and it’s an hour away from your dinner party yet you’re not even close to ready.
your hair’s wet, you’re still in your loungewear, you have no idea what to wear and kaiser’s just flipping through the channels, half bored to death. for his part, at least, he’s already ready.
it’s not even fair how he takes just half an hour to get ready and yet he looks like he does. hair perfectly soft, and he’s wearing a nice black suit with a wine red dress shirt underneath, his tattoos peeking out here and there. if he wasn’t a soccer player, he’d definitely either be a model or a very charming businessman.
“too handsome for you?” kaiser smirks as he catches you looking, and you have to spin on your heels to avoid getting flustered (to his face).
“shut up, kaiser, i haven’t found anything to wear,” you groan, making a beeline for your bedroom. you really wished your friends hadn’t booked a high-end restaurant for little old you—then you could literally just throw on anything and be done with it.
kaiser, completely comfortable in your apartment, strolls into your bedroom with you and starts browsing through your closet, ignoring your protests. within seconds, he finds a dress and holds it out, a lopsided smile filling his face. “how about this?”
the wine red satin dress hovers in front of you, and you have to swallow the lump in your throat before you speak, feeling the line getting blurry. “trying to get me to coordinate outfits with you or something?”
you’re trying your best but your voice quivers just a little bit, and you bet that smug smile on his face that he can hear it. “why not? we look good together,” he shrugs, as though it’s no big deal but it’s hard to stop yourself from overthinking when lately the two of you have been flirting more often and serious than usual.
rolling your eyes and trying not to be too late, you grab the dress from him and change into it, spending some time to yourself to recollect, internally cursing him for being able to make you this flustered over nothing at all.
by the time you come back out into the living room, hair all done and accessories settled, this time, kaiser’s the one who’s caught staring, shameless in the way his eyes drag over you from head to toe. you’d tease him for it, but you’re not entirely sure you’re ready for his comeback so you refrain.
as you grab your go-to black heels and sit down to strap them on properly, kaiser’s quick to offer a hand, his lithe fingers taking your heel from you, slowly inserting your feet, his eyes lingering on your face and his thumb rubbing circles around your ankle. your eyes are glued to his own, and somehow it makes you even more nervous when he’s not joking around. when he looks at you like this—serious, like he’s trying to tell you something without saying anything at all.
the way he ties the straps are gentle and precise, tight but not too tight that it’ll hurt you. you’ve jokingly told him to help you tie your shoelaces before but he’s always refused. yet now he’s helping you put on your heels on both feet without saying a word and the way his hand lingers on your calf when he’s done is enough to make you melt.
on some other day, you’d joke with him and get him to let go. today, you’re silent.
kaiser chuckles, though, his hand casually brushing up your calf slightly before he pulls away, gently patting your head as he gets up.
“let’s go.”
dinner is agonising, enjoyable, agonising.
it’s nice; being seated around a table, enjoying small talk and nonsense with the same group of friends, catching up with people like kaiser and ness who’s been away a lot because of their profession.
yeah, that part’s nice. what’s agonising about it all is how close kaiser is to you, how his right hand casually drapes around your shoulder from time to time, shifting down to your thigh sometimes, making you go crazy.
it’s not like the both of you haven’t been close before, but you feel like maybe this time, it’s different. it’s not just the close proximity, it’s the intimacy of it all that has you inwardly keeling over. what’s worse is that you think you want it, him. in a way you didn’t think to think of before.
“you sure you’re not dating him?”
miko’s words ring repeatedly in your head. somehow, your answer’s changed from nope to you sort of wish you did. you bite your lower lip, absentmindedly laughing along even if you didn’t hear the joke at all.
“you okay?” the voice in your ear nearly makes you jump up from your seat.
on your right, ness is grinning as he looks at you, like he knows something’s going on in that little head of yours. you shake your head anyway, but ness shoots you a knowing smile as his eyes briefly shift to kaiser’s arm around you before winking at you.
fuck, is that really enough to make the heat rush to your cheeks?
“y/n?” one of your other friends calls out, snapping you back to the foreground.
“what?”
“next stop: new club downtown! orange, or grape, or whatever the fuck name it is,” he drawls, excited, “you up for it?”
before you even get the chance to agree, one of the other guys speaks up. “hey kaiser, speaking of clubs, didn’t that dating rumour come up recently? the one with, uh, kaia?”
readjusting himself, kaiser pulls away from you, taking a swig of his beer. “don’t remind me,” he groans, sighing.
“why not? she’s hot!”
there’s a knot in your stomach that you can’t explain.
beside you, ness snickers. “tell ‘em what really happened, stupid.”
that manages to pique your interest.
kaiser sighs, resigning because he knows they’ll just keep hounding him if he refuses. “she tried her luck, that’s all,” he settles for something vague, trying to escape.
ness, however, ever the kind soul, expands on his words, making sure you hear every single bit—you’re not sure if he’s trying to egg you on or just see your reaction.
“please, she was trying to get you to send her home, no?” ness’ explanation gets a reaction out of the group, and you’re glad you all have a private room here so no one outside can hear you, servers included.
“shut up.”
“kaia and kaiser—has a nice ring to it.”
and even though kaiser doesn’t entertain that, you feel a little envy brewing inside you—one that you fail to drown out.
orange is filled with people; combining the fact that it’s holiday season and it’s the club’s launch night, it’s safe to say that there’s barely any room to breathe. still, your friends are all drunk on the alcohol, pulling one another to the dance floor, leaving you and kaiser at the table.
he’s still close as ever, his bare hands brushing yours, one of his arms around your waist, keeping you close.
“dance with me,” he raises his voice over the music. the way he smiles so genuinely now managing to make your heart skip a beat.
suppressing your grin, you wordlessly agree, letting him lead you onto the dance floor. he meanders the crowd skilfully, as expected considering he and ness are frequent clubbers. it’s only now that you realise you’d never gone to such a place with him, which is surprising considering your many years of friendship.
as you join your friends on the floor, you can’t help but notice how kaiser sticks to you and you alone, his hands on your waist, trickling up and down your arm, dancing along behind you. even surrounded by people, he commands your attention alone.
unfair.
but to kaiser, it’s unfair too. it’s not fair how you’re so pretty, it’s not fair how you’ve always been. it’s not fair that he’d fallen slowly for you, and now so so deep. how is it fair that even when he tries to forget you, when he tries not to mess with the friendship, that he ends up falling even more?
his eyes stay glued on you, shamelessly making sure no other man gets their hands on you—it’s fucking insulting how they try to get you to dance with them even when he’s right there. lucky for him, you’re not budging. you’re there. with him. only him. even if your other friends are here.
it’s just him and you and he wonders what you’re thinking. are you as flustered as he is right now? kaiser hasn’t even let himself drink more than one mug of beer, all because he knows this is a night he’d rather remember than risk forgetting.
“hey, isn’t that kaia?” one of your friends excitedly points out and kaiser follows his line of sight.
it is her, and she’s heading this way—but that’s not really important because what’s important is how kaiser noticed you’ve stopped dancing, awkwardly trying to shuffle away. it’s kind of funny, he swears he can tell that you might feel the same way about him. maybe you’re just more stubborn than he is.
so he keeps his arms around you, pulling you close.
“stay with me,” he whispers into your ear, and he suppressed a grin from the goosebumps searing across your neck. he guesses it’s a good sign you’re listening to him.
“kaiser, what’s up?” kaia greets, evidently trying to move for a hug but kaiser’s not budging, squeezing you closer instead.
he nods at her in acknowledgement before letting the rest of his friends throng around her for a photo.
once she’s sufficiently busy, he hears you speak up. “were you dancing with her that time too?”
kaiser manages not to snicker at your obviously jealous tone, “yeah, we went with a few other people after our shoot was wrapped up.”
you nod, and all kaiser can think of somehow is that your shampoo smells so nice. “oh, sure you don’t wanna dance with her again tonight then?”
are you testing him? it’s cute.
he shakes his head. “nah, i danced with her a lot that time already,” he teases, though he’s not too sure whether you’d take it like a joke like it was meant to. when you don’t respond, he chuckles, gently turning you to face him. “there’s one thing i didn’t do with her though.”
kaiser’s face is just inches away from yours, the tip of his nose brushing against your cheek and he’s aware that everyone in the close vicinity is looking at the two of you but he doesn’t care.
honestly, he has to admit, he’s dreamed of doing this a thousand times over, always hovering between the decision to ruin this friendship or not. the thoughts were there whenever he’d wake up next to you on the couch. or whenever all of you met up and one of the other guys would throw their arms around you. or in the mornings when you made breakfast. there’s not a time he’s been sure whether this is what you wanted too.
hell, he’s not even sure now. but fuck, if he wastes another minute not trying he thinks he’ll kill himself for it. and he’s hoping to god this isn’t a dream because you’re not pulling away and you’re not treating this like a joke and it can only be because you want this too.
without another thought, his lips press against yours and it’s like the loud music drowns out into the background, getting lost and fading away. suddenly it’s like you’re the only thing in front of him and fuck, you taste even better than he can ever imagine.
“fuck,” he exhales, cheeks pressed against yours. “be mine?”
still breathless from that kiss, you chuckle weakly and nod, both of you earning whoos all around the room. (you make a mental reminder to tell miko before she winds up seeing this online before you get a chance to explain.)
and just like that, kaiser’s finally gotten the girl of his dreams.
“want you, baby, just you.”
the next morning, the two of you make the headlines.
LIPS LOCKED: KAISER & RUMORED GIRLFRIEND SHOW OFF THEIR LOVE
petty!rin is so baby girl i love writing him as much as i love clingy!rin | warnings: profanity and lil ooc | mentions of food
itoshi rin, likes to believe that he is one rational man.
he truly is. he is a man grounded with rationality, the real definition of calm and quiet. he prides himself on his ability to be stoic and composed at all costs.
he is one to be blunt, approach what’s wrong head on with his words that bleeds. never to cower, never one to hesitate.
truly indeed, itoshi rin is a rational man.
so, why the fuck is he in the kitchen, tightening all jars that he could see?
apparently, when rin is faced with the seemingly impossible mission of getting you to talk to him after a small (he thinks so) disagreement, all rationality goes out the window.
suddenly, he finds himself overcome with a desperate need to hear your voice, to mend whatever rift has come between you. and so, he does the only thing he can think of at this point: he heads to the kitchen.
there, he methodically tightens every jar he can find, each twist of the lid a small act of rebellion against his own calm demeanor. he puts your favorite snacks up high on the shelf, just out of reach, hoping that you'll come to him for help.
on a normal day, rin would never do this. this is nothing but a foolish, incredibly ridiculous, absurd plan. he would never do something like this, but he exhausted every rational option he had at his disposal. he already asked you if you wanted takeout (you just looked at him, you never say no to takeout), asked if you knew where his cleats were because he couldn't find them (of course he knows where they are), and his last resort was to play your favorite show in the living room in the hopes that you'd join him on the couch.
nothing worked. zero successful attempts. nada.
you are officially ignoring him for 5 hours and 36 minutes (not that he’s counting, the wall clock in the living room is just obnoxiously big for its purpose and it keeps reminding him of the time, yup, that must be it).
and rin thinks if this goes on for much longer, you might suggest sleeping in the guest room out of stubborness. no, rin thought of the idea.
there’s no way in hell would rin sleep away from you. that’s just vile torture in his book. a cold ass bed without you? sleep without you in his arms? (he might genuinely prefer to be locked in a room with shidou than have that). that is atrocious, he needs to prevent that from happening, or else he would really lose it.
seemingly content with his scheme, rin places himself on one of the bar stools at the kitchen countertop to wait, boring holes into the bedroom door you've isolated yourself in. if this doesn't work, pinning you down until you utter a word to him may be the next best (worst) option.
after what felt like an eternity (it was ten minutes, max) to rin, you finally emerged from your shared bedroom with a purpose, and that is to fill your grumbling stomach. making your way in the kitchen, you ignored how rin is intently watching every step you make.
you open one of the cupboards to get your leftover bag of chips from yesterday, only to be met by an empty shelf. looking up, you see the said chips placed two shelves higher than usual.
when did that even get there?
hastily, you reached out for a stool to reach it. rin can’t help but let out a silent huff at the sight of you standing on a stool. that stool must be fucking with him, because why is it conveniently there?
rin shifts expectantly on his seat when he sees you looking for the jar of dip you always combine with your chips. and the heavens must be siding with him as he sees you annoyed and struggling to open the said dip.
“let me.”
you were about to deny his offer when you felt his chest already pressing on your back as he reached out for the culprit of your annoyance.
“thanks.” you timidly uttered, but rin didn’t move an inch from where he was pressing on you.
instead, rin tentatively wrapped an arm around your waist and pressed a kiss to your temple. you felt the side of his jaw on your temple, his other hand rubbing smooth circles on your shoulders, tapping on it three times.
you shut your eyes tightly at the feel of his touch, "rin," you started, but you didn't know how to continue.
“i know. i was in the wrong,” he trailed off, tapping three times once again on your exposed collarbone as if the gesture was a language you two only understand, “i’m sorry, y/n,” he said, voice laced with remorse.
you looked over your shoulder to meet rin's gaze. his eyes were soft, and his expression held a hint of guilt that you rarely saw. he seemed to be waiting for your response, and you took a deep breath before answering.
“i only want what's best for you, rin. seeing you exhaust yourself like that hurts me,” you explained, turning to face him and resting your hands on his chest. “and i'm sorry for being immature and ignoring you. it wasn't the right way to handle things.”
immature? only if you knew.
he tightened his grip on you, burying his face in the crook of your neck. “i hate it when we fight," he mumbled, his voice muffled. “it hurts when you don’t look at me.”
taken aback by rin's confession, you struggled to find the right words to alleviate what you’ve done. instead, you tapped three times in his chest, right where his heart beats.
in which you earned a - “not more than i do,” reply from rin, suggesting he understood.
“as you should, rinnie.” you replied with a playful teasing smile.
ah, there it was - the smile rin loved so much. the smile that always promises him that it will be fine - you two will be fine.
if it meant earning that smile over and over again, rin wouldn’t mind throwing out every ounce of rationality from his body.
he’ll never tell you about it though, you’d tease him to death. besides, if you knew, how could he use the same scheme again?
note. i love this trope in books so much that it's everything i think of lately (˘･_･˘)
𝓫𝓵𝓾𝓮 𝓵𝓸𝓬𝓴
ཐི♡ཋྀ ITOSHI SAE
ꨄ︎ home ---- you’ve known sae since you were both sixteen. he’s always dreamed of going overseas and facing the world, will he ever be ready to come home?
conversations ---- he’s back home, and you recall the times you’d spoken to him. all the calls you made, then all the calls he made, and then all the times it went to voicemail.
conversations: restart ---- (alt. ending) sae’s willing to throw everything else away to prove that out of everything in his life, you’re the one sure thing he needs. problem is, will you accept him after what he’s done?
about time ---- nothing’s necessary except his talent in soccer, until you appeared. and now, he’s got a new challenge.
whole ---- sae has few interests, and one of them is you. but sometimes, being special just isn’t enough.
incomplete ---- sae rarely knows what he’s doing when he comes to you. and sometimes, by the time he figures it out, it’s all way too late and you’re too far gone.
affection ---- the way sae loves you is beautiful. it’s nothing like you envisioned and something you never knew you needed.
chasing memories ---- you’re the one sae can’t get over. he’s beginning to think he never will.
ꨄ︎ always, eventually, yours ---- you have a crush on sae. for a long time now. and he’s always known that. he just wants to see how long you can hold out.
all this time ---- just when you feel like giving up, sae pulls you back into him.
& again ---- sae’s still learning the ropes on being in a relationship, and sometimes you think you can’t wait any longer. but this is itoshi sae, maybe you can.
and when he wants you ---- what do you do when your best friend kind of sort of forces you to confess your two-year long crush when you’re not ready to? pray and hope for the best.
don’t want you to go ---- he’s stupid and stubborn and bad at being a boyfriend. you make him want to be better though. always.
moral of the story ---- you and sae have been in love with each other since high school. during your special day, he throws you a curveball.
pucker up, buttercup ---- being sae’s girlfriend is tough. there’s a lot of things he can’t make time for, and unfortunately this time, it’s you. but somehow, he always pulls through.
crazy good ---- hold up, netizens. you’re in for a treat this time because guess what? out of all people, it’s time for itoshi sae to hard launch his girlfriend: you.
birthday wish ---- it’s itoshi sae’s birthday. the world hates you. you’ve never been a lucky one. being “shit out of luck” is the only thing you know. the tables must turn.
series: if not for you ---- neither of you want this. both you and sae reluctantly agree to this marriage, although sae’s dissatisfaction far outweighs your own. with hidden agendas and old flames, will this ever work out between the two of you, or will your forced spark be doomed to fail? [ completed ]
series: priceless ---- there’s a high price to pay for getting involved with itoshi sae. there’s an even higher price to pay when it seems like he’s not the only one. with everything going on behind the scenes, will you be able to afford all of it? [ ongoing ]
ཐི♡ཋྀ ITOSHI RIN
something stronger ---- rin thinks about you all the time, for better or for worse. problem is, he really shouldn’t be anymore. things never seem to work out for the both of you, will trying even make a difference this time?
soft ---- one cute thing he would do for you.
one answer ---- you and rin are both oblivious to each other’s feelings. but maybe one push is all you need.
the things you left behind ---- you & sae had something special, until he forcibly cuts it off. and now rin has you in his sights—but things get complicated when sae comes back for you.
ཐི♡ཋྀ NAGI SEISHIRO
effervescent ---- it’s a little more difficult for nagi to realise his feelings compared to the average man.
in his language ---- he didn’t ask you out because he wanted to, yet nagi gets more than he bargained for in the end.
ཐི♡ཋྀ MIKAGE REO
what if it’s you and me
love, you ---- heartbroken, you turn to your best friend for an escape. but he gives you much more than that.
ཐི♡ཋྀ ISAGI YOICHI
build a date ---- isagi has a crush on you.
ཐི♡ཋྀ MICHAEL KAISER
skin-deep ---- kaiser has more reason to visit his regular cafe spot now. and he’s not gonna quit until he makes you his.
no contest ---- being just friends doesn’t mean much when neither of you really want to keep it that way. problem is, will either of you make the first move?
I FINALLY FOUND YOU
Ch. 2 - The Economics of Rumors
This is The Boyfriend Contract series, Chapter 2. Inspired by The Love Hypothesis and The Business Proposal. Azul Ashengrotto x fem! Yuu (reader). You can view this on ao3.
Ch. 1 | Next chapter
In most cases, the economic rumor makes consumers dubious of the product's type, quality, and effects on health, so it can be quite an issue... but rather than an issue, he saw it as an opportunity. To me though, it's a nuisance.
It was foolish of her to believe that everything would be A-Okay after Riddle's overblot. Aside from the usual NRC mishaps (that she somehow got used to), she thought she would be able to live through her first year without any more major issues, maybe live long enough for her to get back home.
But then the Spelldrive incident happened, then the Octavinelle incident, then the Winter break incident, and then more incidents, and then the dreadful, gut-wrenching, absolutely breathtaking (not in a good way) kiss incident. Of all the goddamn incidents-- she did not expect any of them to involve a kiss.
(No. Vil's kiss on her cheek during the Styx incident does not count.)
She knew Azul well enough that he didn't like to involve himself with irrelevant matters unless it benefited him in some way. So even if she had some sort of obsessive guy chasing after her, she'd have to offer him something worthy enough for him to help her.
She hadn't received any message from him so far, and the Leech twins hadn't arrived at her doorstep yet, so... she assumed she was safe. For now.
Unless, of course, he actually did file a complaint for sexual harassment, in that case, the Headmage would have been the one at her door by now.
Yesterday's events had taken up more energy from her than she realized, so she contacted her boss and called in sick. Thank heavens he was kind, almost fatherly, and told her to rest until she felt better. She should have felt guilty for lying, but she was too exhausted to feel anything. She didn't really want to deal with any people right now.
However, as much as she enjoyed days off, Yuu became extra restless when she had nothing to do. Because doing nothing meant her mind was free to go in different directions, and that direction most often went downhill. There had to be something she could do, even if it was small or insignificant, anything to make her think of anything else other than what she didn't want to think about.
She had done as much as she could. She washed the dishes, did the laundry, cooked increasingly unsettling eggs (most of them went to Grim's stomach), washed the dishes again, cleaned the lounge, rearranged her bookshelf, created a new playlist for next week, watched some videos on Magicam, read a book on meditation-- She was slowly running out of things to do when she suddenly remembered the homework they had for History of Magic, it was a paper on any chosen topic among the ones they previously discussed during the past semester. Although the deadline was still in a week, Yuu figured it would be better to start on it early.
After making herself comfortable on her couch, Yuu opened her laptop (a very generous gift from Ortho, who noticed her lack of electronics, bless that sweet humanoid boy) and began to do some light research, but got side-tracked by the string of notifications that streamed from her phone.
With a sigh, she set her laptop on the nearby coffee table and grabbed her phone. A message from...Ace? And Deuce. Ace and Deuce. And Epel. And Jack. And...holy shit.
Was everyone out to get her or something? Why is she suddenly getting messages from Cater and Riddle? Even Sebek?! Of all people???
Before she could open any of the messages, several loud knocks pounded on her door. She knew well enough who it was that she didn't bother getting up to open it, they knew to knock first before entering after all.
The door to the lounge slammed open, startling the poor girl.
"Jesus Christ!" She clutched her phone to her chest, "Ace. You scared the shit out of me! Calm down will you?"
"Calm down?" Uh oh. She did not like that voice. Ace only ever used that voice a few times on other people, but never on her. She was usually the one using that voice on him. You know, to keep him in line.
Oh, how the turns have tabled.
"You want me to calm down?" His voice was like venom. He stalked over to her, almost stomping, as Deuce-- and... is that Epel, Jack, and Ortho?!
"Uh...what's going on?" She looked at their expressions. Ace looked displeased by something, Deuce looked uncomfortable, Jack and Epel both looked unsure, while Ortho simply looked curious. "Why is everyone here?"
"Yesterday."
She raised a brow, "Yesterday?"
"Yesterday!"
She rolled her eyes, "What about yesterday?"
"Yesterday! With Azul!"
She froze. Oh no. "What about him?"
"Don't play dumb with us, Yuu," Ace gave her one of his no-bullshit looks, "What's with you and Azul? Did you make a contract with him or something? Is he holding you hostage?"
"W-What?! No! What are you even getting at?" She didn't like where this was going.
PLEASE don't say what I think you're gonna say.
"Um, Yuu, yesterday..." Deuce started rather bashfully, "Cater and Trey saw you and Azul together, uh..."
"Kissing." Ace finished, "They saw you kissing."
Is it still possible to play dumb? "Me? Kiss who?"
"AZUL!" The ginger yelled as he hurriedly pulled out his phone and showed her what was on the screen.
It was... It was her. And Azul. Kissing.
The cafe she worked at had been gaining popularity for some time now so encountering students from both Night Raven College and Royal Sword Academy was hardly a surprise.
"Cater took that," He explained, "He and Trey were supposed to visit you, but then he saw you go up to Azul and then that happened."
Oh my fucking god.
A memory resurfaced from when Cater and the others heard that the cafe she was working in was gaining a lot of attention. He promised he would drop by sometime with Trey or Riddle, and as luck would have it, it just HAD to be at the time when she...
Oh god. This is bad. This is really fucking bad. If Cater knew, then EVERYONE knew.
"Yuu..." Jack started slowly, "You're not dating Azul, are you?" He grimaced at his own question. Everyone else looked at her waiting for an answer.
She sighed. Even though the reason was going to sound stupid (which it was), she couldn't lie to them when they were looking at her like that. There was no reason to hide it anyway, after everything she had gone through with them.
It's quite a depressing story, but even in her own world, Yuu was an outcast. Since middle school, she had trained herself not to make a fuss over things she couldn't control. If no one wanted to accept her, then so be it, all she had to do was accept herself. She never let other people's opinions deter her, instead, she worked her hardest not to let it bother her. She buried herself in her work, focusing only on her academics and her part-time jobs as a way to cope with the loneliness. It all paid off since she got accepted into her dream college.
She was supposed to start university in a month, but her sudden arrival in Twisted Wonderland changed all her plans. Despite all her hard work, she had to start over again in this new world where she had nothing, knew nothing, knew no one, and as far as the law was concerned, she didn't exist here at all.
Yuu, once again, had to navigate her way through NRC alone-- until... Grim, Ace, and Deuce. Then Jack, then Epel, then Ortho...
In a way, it was like falling in love. She entered Twisted Wonderland a feral stranger, but these people accepted her, as strange and quirky as they were in their own right, she felt right at home in their little group. Even though some of them would deny it, she knew that they always got her back.
"It's a bit of a long story."
And like clockwork, Ace and Deuce sat on the same couch she was sitting on, Jack took the armchair on her left while Epel proceeded to sit on the floor in front of her, propping his elbow on the coffee table next to him, while Ortho simply sat on said coffee table. They did this in sync, with all their eyes trained on her the whole time.
She let out a deep sigh, preparing herself for a lengthy explanation. She had a lot to say to them, and one of them was the fact that she didn't tell any of them about Kelvin Watson and his persistent advances.
"Listen, I promise you guys it's not—"
"Prefect."
Fuck.
She didn't need to look at the door to know who that smooth, melodic deep voice belonged to. But just like dominos, she followed the befuddled gazes of her friends as they turned to the doorway where Azul happened to be standing.
When the fuck did he get here and why do people keep barging into my house???
"Azul," she stammered, standing up to greet him.
"I didn't know you had company," he strode over to her smoothly. Was it that natural for him to be graceful?!
"Oh, uh.."
"Did you already tell them?" He asked when she was busy mulling over what to say. What was he going on?
"T...Tell us what?" Ace was the first one to ask. Well, the bravest one to speak up first, to be painfully accurate.
"I'm sure you already suspect it," Azul said with a modest smile that almost looked...kind. If the whole contract incident hadn't happened months back she would have believed him to be innocent, and she was sure her friends would have believed the same thing too. "We didn't mean to hide it at first, but with everything Yuu and I were going through... well, I hope you understand."
No way. There's no goddamn way.
"S-So it's true?!" Deuce asked this time, "That you two..."
"Well, we have been going on dates..." She felt a subtle but large and firm pressure on her lower back— no, not her back, but the spot between her back and her waist— steadying her, and she didn't need to turn around to know that it was Azul's hand that was precisely 3.5 inches above her ass.
Holy shit.
It was an intimate gesture that sent tingles throughout her body, nearly overriding her senses. Her friends were staring, and she was sure that they could see the heat rushing to her face in the form of the color rose pink.
How was he this good at being charming?! No, maybe it was the kiss that desensitized her— she shouldn't have to think or FEEL this way about Azul Ashengrotto of all people.
"Is everything alright?" Azul asked in a gentle voice. Azul was never gentle. He was calm, calculating, and cold, but Yuu found it so hard to think when she felt his hand rubbing her softly as if to comfort her, and when he stopped, his hand was now 2 inches above her ass. And it made her so, so, dizzy.
"Just tired, and overwhelmed," she managed to say without stuttering or fainting.
"That won't do," his brows furrowed, he was really good at looking concerned. "Come, let's have some tea at my office."
No. Nonononono— tea at his office means being alone with him, and she does NOT want to be alone with anyone right now. Especially him.
"You don't have to," she said politely, trying to hear her own voice over the sound of her beating heart, "you must be busy."
"No, please. With the disaster of a date we had yesterday, I wish to make it up to you," he continued the act (why was he even doing it in the first place?!?), "Still... I had no idea one of your admirers would be persistent enough to ruin it. I should have seen it coming." He added context. Great. Context means more questions from her friends.
"It's...it's really alright..." and please stop, my brain can't take much of this anymore.
He moved his hand straight behind her back before gently nudging her, "Shall we? I've acquired some rare sweets for you, as well."
Oh God. She loves sweets and he knows it.
"Um, I guess we'll see you then," Ace scratched the back of his neck, looking rather awkward, "Yuu, I'll text you later when, uh...yeah."
She nodded as Azul took her hand (and heavens his hands were so soft) and led her out of the dorm.
"Is this some kind of joke? Are you trying to prank me or something? Do you have brain cancer? Do I have brain cancer? Is this a new business scheme where you scam a person into dating you so that you can get what you want from them?"
She ignored Jade's look of amusement as he poured tea into her cup, and Floyd's snort as he leaned against the bookshelf right behind Azul. The aforementioned boy was sitting on another couch across from her, leaning back with a deep sigh.
Why is HE looking exasperated?! Wasn't he the one who kept up the whole "dating" spiel?! Why did he do that?! I was about to tell my friends the truth!!
The walk to Mostro Lounge felt longer than it should have. Though it normally took several minutes (even shorter if you ran for your life, ideally away from it though), getting there felt like hours when you're being exposed to gawking students who happened to be passing by, and for some fucking reason there was a bunch of them on the street when they were walking. They surely noticed the hand that smoothly moved to her shoulder as well as their close proximity. She might have even seen a shocked Riddle and Trey.
"I'm not that enthusiastic about it either, okay?" He said, like, y'know, a liar.
"Then why?"
"Because I would like to make a deal with you."
"Of course you do," she rolled her eyes, picking up her teacup, "I've seen this coming. For the record, I'm not setting up Ramshackle for collateral again. I don't think I have anything significant to give you," aside from my newly acquired book collection of The Devilish Duke. A really hot and funny romcom set in the 18th century. Good shit.
"It's not Ramshackle Dorm that I want."
"Then what do you want?"
"You."
At that moment, Yuu experienced a feeling that was dangerously similar to what you call a "hypnagogic jerk", also known as that feeling where you think you're falling in your sleep, only to jerk awake, sweating like crazy on your bed and not falling off a cliff.
Yes, there's a term for that.
That sudden jerk in her body nearly caused her to choke on her tea. She quickly placed the teacup down and coughed into her sleeve several times before staring wide-eyed at Azul.
She expected to see him with his usual infuriatingly attractive smirk but...
Why is he looking away?!
"Ugh, whatever," she composed herself, taking a cookie from one of the plates. As it turns out, Azul did have some sweets in his office. Rare ones too... "The answer is no. Did you know that you're the very definition of a 'red flag'?"
"How flattering," he deadpanned. "Listen, this is important."
She sighed heavily, crossing her arms as she chewed the cookie. She stayed silent afterward, a gesture to let him continue. Azul told the twins to leave the room before speaking.
"I had a meeting with a potential business partner a couple of days ago. It was one that I was particularly looking forward to," he began, "the negotiation was doing well, but there was one setback."
She furrowed her brows, "Which is...?"
"He thought I was too young, therefore, not quite... experienced, or mature."
Her eyes widened. She wouldn't say it to his face, but despite his young age (they were both 17), Azul was already skilled in both academics and business, he gave off an air of professionalism and maturity, the very picture of a sophisticated businessman.
"That's...disappointing," she muttered.
"Very much so," he breathed out, almost exhausted. No wonder he was exasperated, that meeting must have been plaguing his thoughts the whole time...
She encouraged him to continue.
"Well, anyway, I tried to appeal to him to get an agreement, but he insisted that he just couldn't get into a business contract with someone who was 'too young'," he nearly rolled his eyes. Nearly. He didn't, but she had the feeling he wanted to. "Anyway, I looked into his background after that—"
"Of course you did."
"And I found out that before he was a successful businessman, he was the only son of the previous company chairman. When he was our age, he was the very definition of 'immature'. He was a spoiled, trust-fund, party-loving playboy who relied too much on his father's influence and money... well, you understand, don't you?"
She nodded. The guy sounded like every male lead of a typical contemporary romance. You know, the good girl x playboy trope where the playboy's whole world changes after meeting the "good girl" and he starts to change himself. She's read a good amount of those types of books.
"Due to his behavior, his father had him transferred from his elite high school to a public high school to teach him a lesson. He also had his allowance considerably lowered, so he couldn't throw any of his elaborate parties, and he was also given a bodyguard to watch his behavior."
She sucked some air through her teeth. For a trust fund boy, it must have been a hard-knock life. Not that she could really relate, she had to work for almost everything she had, so it was routine for her.
"Apparently, his behavior changed when he met his high school sweetheart and his current wife. He retired from his spoiled ways and turned into a responsible and loyal man. They've been married for twelve years now. They just celebrated their 12th wedding anniversary last month."
"Huh... that's actually quite cute," she smiled a little, thinking of how the man's life must have changed when he met his wife. Given that he met her in a public school, she must have come from humbler origins. "But wait, what does this have to do with me?"
"He's quite a family man, and he has a firm belief that a person becomes properly mature when they meet their soulmate," he shifted in his seat, leaning closer as he looked into her eyes. "He will be hosting a fundraising event next month."
"That is to say...?"
"I need you to pretend to be my girlfriend and go with me to the event. If he realizes I have a partner, he will surely consider me mature enough to pass as a potential business partner."
Wow, Azul must really want this guy's support.
"Is it really that worth it?"
"If it wasn't, I wouldn't be asking you to do this. Having a contract with him would increase the chance of opening a second establishment outside of school, not to mention Mostro Lounge greatly benefit from them due to their influence in the industry."
Leave it to Azul to think ahead. He's always been thinking of how to improve Mostro Lounge, whether it's the quality of their menu or their services.
"Have you considered getting a real date?"
"Have you considered getting a real boyfriend?"
"Touché."
She narrowed her eyes at him. Truth be told, as helpful as it was having Azul's aid with getting rid of Kelvin for a day, she didn't think there would be anything else in it for her to keep up this whole dating charade. It wouldn't have even happened if only Cater hadn't taken that picture.
She groaned, "It's gonna be difficult."
"What would be?"
"To pretend that we're dating."
"How?"
"Well... for one, isn't it suspicious that you and I weren't even that close to begin with? And suddenly we're dating?"
He shrugged his shoulders, "Not too difficult. We could simply tell them that we were trying to keep it a secret."
"Do you really think anyone would believe that?"
"Your friends certainly did."
"I'm pretty sure this agreement benefits you more than it benefits me."
"I beg to differ," he said, "I've prepared a list of benefits for you. I'm a rather generous man after all."
"Your tone is starting to piss me off."
"What?"
"You're starting to sound like Crowley."
He snorts, "Very well then. I'll try to avoid that in the future. Wouldn't want to upset my future girlfriend after all."
"I haven't agreed to your contract yet."
"Yet," he emphasized, she followed with a roll of her eyes. "Anyway, I obviously wouldn't leave any job uncompensated. As long as our contract is on, I will be at your service. I can help you with studying and homework. If you need study guides, I'll provide them for you. Given that you're already taking care of your financial needs, I'll take the initiative to pay for our dates. If you need protection from bullies and persistent admirers, I'll be one call away. If you get into trouble and you need a cover-up, I'll be there to help you."
He doesn't finish there, "Jade and Floyd will be at your aid as well. If there's anything that you need from them, you simply have to ask. If you follow my terms, I will follow yours."
She bit her lip, for a fake dating job, all those benefits sound... really nice. Considering Azul's standing and influence in Night Raven, all those would be possible.
"Still... It's not going to be easy keeping up this charade you know? No offense but considering your reputation, people are mostly gonna think that you're holding me hostage through a contract."
"We'll be fine as long as we greet each other in the hallways and walk to each other's classes. Your constant presence in Mostro Lounge will help as well."
She rolled her eyes, "Dude, people who are dating don't just walk to each other's classes together or say hi in the hallways, you know? Do you even know the first thing about dating?"
Azul clears his throat as he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "I...admit I'm not an expert in this kind of field. But it's not like you can say you're any better."
She rolled her eyes. Again. "FYI, I've dated twice before, so I'd say I'm more of an expert on this than you are." No, she isn't.
Her first boyfriend was in middle school, and the only reason why she dated him was because he confessed to her in front of their whole damn class and all their classmates cooing and cheering pressured her into saying yes to him. They lasted a solid two and a half months.
The second one... was a bit more complicated. They lasted quite long, but that was because Yuu thought that they were going to last the rest of their lives. Unfortunately, that was too good to be true. Everything that seems perfect at first glance never turns out that way in the end.
"Ah... I see. Well then, what do people who are dating do?" For some reason, he sounded a little defeated.
"Well, uh, they...talk."
"About?"
"A lot of things. Their hobbies, their favorite food, the coffee they drank this morning, the shitty customer that keeps asking for the manager just because they thought the croissant they ordered tasted off and therefore demanded a refund even though they already finished it all-"
He snorted. She glared at him, "Hey, that's some serious stuff, okay? People like that are like, the worst."
He raised his hands in mock surrender, "I didn't say anything, but I do agree. Unreasonable customers are the worst. Anyway, what else do people dating do?"
"Uh...They pick apples together, frolic in fields, go on picnic dates." Sounds idiotic but—
"Sounds idiotic," Azul sighed as he crossed his arms, echoing the words in her mind, "Perhaps you should just go tell your friends that we went out and frolicked in the fields."
It was her turn to snort, "Like they would believe that."
"Like I said: idiotic."
"But hey, picnics are fun."
"Sure."
"Ahem. Anyway, aside from that..." she tapped her chin carefully as she continued to wrack her mind. "Well, people who date do a lot of things together, honestly. Hard to pinpoint but, they often eat breakfast together, get coffee together, they know each other's favorite pizza, they hug, hold hands...they...kiss."
"I can't imagine ever doing that." The twitch on his lips was enough to indicate that he was holding back a smile.
She giggled in response, "Like I would ever kiss you."
"Oh? I certainly wasn't the one who initiated it, unless I do have brain cancer and I'm misremembering things."
"I'm really sorry about that," she said, mortified at the resurfacing memory.
Surprisingly, Azul shrugs it off, "It already happened. There's no use crying over spilled milk."
What surprised her more, however, was how casual Azul seemed while they were talking. She failed to realize that at some point, he had dropped his businessman act and started talking to her like... a normal person. Like an actual Azul. It was strange, for some reason.
Silence stretched on for a few moments as she contemplated the offer once more. Dating Azul... even if it's pretend, wasn't an easy choice to make. The thought of fake dating wasn't a pleasant thought to begin with. It seemed more like a waste of time than an investment, but with all the benefits he's offering... maybe having him around would help...?
The biggest thing she was worrying about was keeping up the lie to her friends. They were her world, after all, and she wasn't ready to lose their trust just yet. But their reactions earlier were already enough to make her fall on her knees— Azul wasn't exactly the...best person to date. She was sure that Ace, Deuce, and Grim still have war flashbacks after what he made them go through during the incident with Octavinelle, and Jack trusts that she knows better than to suck up to Azul. Epel wasn't there during the incident, and so was Ortho, but she knew well enough that they were weary of him.
But...
"Well?" He suddenly spoke up, snapping her out of her thoughts. Her very... tired and messy thoughts. "I can write up the contract if you're willing to agree."
She bit her lip, "Can you...give me some more time to think about it?"
He stared at her for a moment before nodding, "Yes, of course. Take your time."
When I go read a fanfic, but then see it was last updated over two years ago
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