its cruel to tell us you are going to update in 24 hours to get lost for weeksđ where are u dear? It would have been fine but u made us expect it đ
I KNOW! I'm the worst for that, and I do sincerely apologize. A lot is happening right now, I've decided to move apartments and have been working on a bigger project in the meantime. Life gets in the way heavily and it's hard to keep the mood whatsoever steady, especially with BPD.
Today one part will drop. I'm staying up late and will be drinking so hopefully another one will follow. Thank you guys for being around and I wish you a happy new years.
All the loveđ€
There's your answer
Gotham is an awful place to be why do we all want to be there lol
Girl I'm loving your commentary so badđđđ»
JUST ANOTHER OF YOUR MISTAKES
Thomas Shelby x Reader
Warnings: angst, swearing, violence, grieving, a lot of pain, eventual fluff, smut
A/N: thanks for reading guys
Y/N was never a light sleeper, but this particular time waking up felt way more difficult than usual. Her head was hurting from all the crying and the last thing she could remember was Tommy holding her against his chest and the familiar scent of his cologne mixed with his own unique scent before she nodded off, unable to handle the recent events.
âMrs. Shelby, you're awakeâ One of the maids spoke up with a gentle smile, putting a steaming tea on the nightstand by her side.
Sitting up, Y/N furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.
âI'm not a Shelbyâ She responded with more annoyance than she'd like.
âOhâ The older woman said with a hint of shame. âMy apologies. Mr. Shelby asked to bring you tea and some pain relief tonic,â
Y/N nodded, thanking her quietly before she rose from the bed, looking around. The room looked familiar in a less than pleasurable way, just like the clothes she was wearing. Sighing deeply she walked out of the room, seeing the dark corridor of the places she once called home.
After getting refreshed and dressed, Y/N walked toward the grand staircase. She stopped cold, feeling goosebumps running through her spine in the worst possible way when she saw the monumental portrait of Thomas and her in the stairwell. One she used to see everyday. The eyes on the portrait looked as lively as ever, mocking the pain she held in her chest every time she saw it. There she was, the former lady of the house, laying claim to her domain even from the grave. The longer she stared at her, the more she felt Grace was taunting her. âYou may have been his woman once, but I have his heart and his ring on my finger now.â The words rang in her ears, coming from the depths of her memory, loud as the day she heard them for the first time. Y/N couldn't seem to be able to tear her gaze away, silently battling the ghost that seemed to curse her relationship forever.
She stood there for a long moment, immersed in the painting so much that she didn't realise she was being watched.
Thomas stood in the doorway on the other side of the corridor, watching her silently losing the battle as shame gnawed on his insides. He should have thrown it away long ago, but it was the last thing on his mind as he desperately looked for Y/N everywhere. The dead woman on his wall wasn't a big concern.
âYou're awakeâ He spoke up, unable to handle the silence anymore.
She turned around, almost startled, as he caught her staring at her. The first thing she noticed were the glasses on his nose, and she fought against the little smirk that tried to appear on her lips so badly.
âWhat am I doing here? Where are the boys?â She asked, straight to the point. Thomas shifted from foot to foot awkwardly, knowing she wouldn't be happy with the news.
âBoys are with Frances upstairs, playing.â He responded, looking her in the eyes. âYou're not safe outside of Arrow house. You three need to stay here until the vendetta is over.â
âWhat if you had more men surrounding my flat instead?â Y/N bargained.
âItâs too dangerous and I need my men concentrated not spread out over citiesâ he replied, already prepared for the questions he knew she'd ask.
She wanted to argue so badly. Y/N wanted to be free from him and the reminders of the past that this house held. But she knew that receiving a black hand was a serious threat she didnât have the capacity to handle by herself.
âThe only reason I'm not leaving right now is because I need to keep them safe.â She said, stepping closer. â...and if anything happens to us, I want you to know that it's all your fault.â
Despite knowing and seeing the pure hatred in her eyes, Thomas could never fully brace himself for the impact of her words.
âNothing will happen to any of you. I give you my wordâ He said, quieter this time.
âYour word means nothing to me, Thomas. Just⊠just stay away from us as much as possible.â Y/N added, wanting to walk away.
âYou can't expect me to stay away. They.. are my kids. My sons.â He said suddenly, and the confidence and fierceness of his voice made her stop in her tracks. âI regret losing you every single day. Every day I grieved the loss of my bloody heart, and then I found out there's three I should have been grieving. But you're here, and so are they. So I won't let yoâthem go.â He hissed out, almost frantically and the vulnerability in his eyes made her slightly tremble. It hurt even more, because she waited so long to hear.. anything. Any crumb of reassurance would be enough to keep her here, but he didn't say a fucking word.
Straightening her back, Y/N inhaled a deep breath, looking back at the bloody portrait who was witnessing the whole scene. Seconds later she looked at him again, and the fire in his eyes was more lively, outweighing the dead, judgemental stare.
âThey won't call you their father. If you break this rule, you won't see us again.â
***
The next day Y/N woke up, bracing herself for another battle as she walked down the stairs and to her surprise, the portrait was⊠gone. Her heart thumped wildly at the realisation and she couldn't believe her eyes. Suddenly the tension in the house seemed to have lessened.
Walking to the kitchen, she noticed Thomas sitting by the table with a cup of coffee and a cigarette in his hand, as he read the newspaper. It felt weirdly domesticated and the thought alone made her smirk.
âDid the boys eat?â She asked, not sure what to expect.
âFrances fed them an hour ago. Tommy is napping in the living room, and Nick is picking daisies with Mary in the garden.â He responded in a calm tone, not tearing his gaze away from the newspaper.
Silence hung in the air as they each did their own thing
Finishing up her breakfast, Y/N cleared her throat again as she looked at the wall in front of her.
âThe portrait is goneâ She pointed out in an emotionless voice, not looking at him. A couple longer moments passed before she heard him exhale a cloud of smoke.
âWhat portrait? He responded, and Y/Nâs lips stretched into a subtle smile before she grabbed her plate and walked away.
A couple days later Y/N still avoided him, occasionally getting to talk to John or Arthur, but both of them were distracted by the giant threat hanging over the family. Polly seemed to keep it together the best, coming over whenever she felt like it for some female company.
Y/N said her goodbyes to Polly, going to put the cups into the sink and cleaning the mess after Nick. She wasn't used to having maids doing everything for her, so it was more comfortable to just clean the mess herself. Nick himself was currently spending time with his uncles by the stables, and Tommy was⊠who knows where.
After cleaning, Y/N went looking for the other boy, asking Frances who just directed her to the little room where the toys were stored.
She expected everything, but not the view she saw arriving in the doorway. Little Tommy sat back on his legs, watching with wide eyes and furiously colouring the different shapes Thomas drew for him.
âDat?â Tommy asked suspiciously, pointing towards the crooked flower on the paper and glancing at him with big eyes.
âThis?â He asked with a grin, âthat's a flowerâ he explained, to which the boy nodded, narrowing his eyes lightly.
â...and dat?!â He asked suddenly in a squeaky tone, seeing the car Thomas drew for him.
âThat's a car. Almostâ He chuckled, seeing the crooked shapes as he tried his very best.
Tommy nodded, grinning in the same way as his father before glancing at his mum.
âHi!â He waved, before pointing to the flower again. âfwowa!â he said proudly, pushing his little chest forward.
Thomas just laughed quietly, putting the pencil down.
âGood job, little manâ he said, before slowly rising from the floor with a groan.
âOh God, I'm too old for thisâ He whispered with a chuckle, glancing at Y/N who wasn't able to suppress the smile on her face after she heard Tommy talk. âDon't smile like that, now it's your turn.â Thomas added, passing by her in the doorway, his shoulder brushing against hers.
***
The next couple weeks were⊠rougher. Changretta was relentless in his search, which turned into a couple of seriously dangerous situations where John got shot in the chest barely coming out alive. Polly didn't agree with a lot of Thomas' actions, despite his inability to back off right now. He stood his ground, no matter how difficult it was sometimes to keep Y/N inside Arrow house whenever worse moments would arrive. And they did, fairly frequently.
The pull he felt became stronger and stronger, no matter how many daggers she kept throwing. Spewing the words she held deep inside, reminding him of the monster he used to be⊠or maybe still was? He couldn't tell. The view in the reflection of his mirror was so blurry, that it didn't matter. As long as she saw him to be fit enough to be around boys.
The house was completely quiet as he made his way through the corridor, lacking the usual sounds of kids playing or Y/N walking from one room to the other. Walking past the library, he caught a glimpse of light coming from the room that made him stop in his tracks.
His hands trembled with anxiety. The fear settled in his ribs over three years ago and hasn't left him once, even though they were here.
Thomas was aware of how powerless he was once the vendetta was over. The thought of them leaving the house and never coming back was making his heart squeeze painfully, reminding him of the privilege he once had, but gave it up willingly. The fear was like a loop, tightening around his throat with each passing day as he grew comfortable coming home and seeing them here.
Walking into the library, Thomas was completely quiet, wanting nothing but to see her if it was all he could count on. He was completely unaware of the fact that she always felt his presence. Sometimes letting him stay, and other times making him leave so desperately that made him wonder whether it was possible to day from a broken heart.
Step after step he tried to control his shallow breathing as he finally saw her. Standing by the big shelf, he traced over the backs of books standing there for so long, it felt like they were always there.
âYou wouldn't like that oneâ He spoke up quietly, noticing how she didn't even budge hearing his voice. It took a longer moment before she replied.
âHow so?â Her voice was calm, light-hearted as she found herself lost in the countless stories filling up the wooden shelves. The nagging thoughts in his mind disappeared the second he heard her voice.
âBecause you don't like uncertainty. It's filled with unanswered questions and has an open ending.â He thought for a moment before replying, well aware of the content of this book, because he read them all. In the moments of despair, trying to hold onto every scrap of feelings in the house so empty, it felt like nobody lived inside.
Sighing deeply, Y/N put the book back in its place, grabbing another one.
âNobody likes uncertainty, Thomas. Holding onto the moment, unsure of what's to come.â She sighed, hearing his slow footsteps approaching. âA book is just a book. You can close it, and move onto another one anytime. If only life was just as easy.â
Silence in the room caused the whole scenery to become more intimate, unexpectedly even for him. Stopping mere inches behind her, he watched the back of her head for a moment, remembering the nightmares he had every night. Ones where he couldn't reach her, no matter how he tried.
His breath caught in his throat as he slowly raised his hand, moving it closer and closer towards her shoulder. Inches away, he noticed the goosebumps covering her skin. Without looking he reached out to the shelf, grasping onto the book he knew by heart, while his arm brushed against her own.
He stood close, too close, and Y/N knew it too well, yet she couldn't bring herself to make him leave or pull away. The way he trembled as his chest pressed lightly against her back made her stand still.
âYou'd love this oneâ He whispered, not feeling brave enough to speak loudly. The uncertainty they talked about he knew better than anything else.
Her breathing became heavier, feeling him so close, the tingling on her skin she hadn't felt for so long almost made her flinch. Slowly, she turned around facing him.
This, Thomas didn't expect as she suddenly looked up, their eyes meeting in a gaze long forgotten, yet still alive and lively as when they looked for the first time.
âI don't read anymoreâ She confessed quietly, and his eyes couldn't help but watch her lips intently. The way they wrapped around the words she spoke.
The urge to grab and hold her closer was strong, almost too strong. Tommy tilted his head to the side, getting a better look at her face in the dim light.
âI can read it to youâ He offered quietly, as it was the closest she allowed him to⊠just be near her.
So he waited, scared of ruining the moment as she moved closer. Their noses brushing against each other.
âI wanted you to speak, not read.â The sound of her voice was like the most beautiful music he ever got to listen to, even though the words were far from it. â...but now it's too late, and you're standing too close.â her breath touched his lips, taunting.
âŠand then she pulled away, leaving him standing there. Slowly making her way out of the library.
âYou're cruelâ He said, loud enough for Y/N to hear.
***
Y/N opened her eyes suddenly, sitting up as she took a deep breath, desperately trying to blink away the nightmare she had. The clock showed three AM in the morning, and her heart was pounding from the fear she felt. One she rarely felt anymore, feeling as Thomas was taking it over day by day, despite her unwillingness to share anything. Even the broken, ugly parts he ruined.
His cold eyes kept looking at her in the dream, so unfazed by the idea of her absence. The humiliation turned into physical tears rolling down her cheeks as the memories clouded her reasoning.
Getting up from her bed, she remembered the way he touched her. Avoiding her eyes, throwing his head back. Not bothering to bare himself, so eager to take but never give. Forcing her to pour from a completely empty cup.
Her bare feet were cold against the floor as she quickly made her way through the corridor, knowing where she'd find him. Swiftly opening the door to his office, Y/N didn't bother to say a word or wipe her tears away as she quickly walked up, not looking him in the eyes.
âY/N?â He asked, taking his glasses off and setting them on his desk while she suddenly pulled him back, creating more space to straddle his lap. Tears kept streaming in a smaller amount, but never ending as she ripped his shirt open, baring his chest.
âWhat are youââ He tried to speak up, but she didn't let him, as she pressed her lips against his so aggressively his breath caught in his throat.
Pulling on his belt she unbuckled it skillfully, a motion she knew too well from all these years ago. The inner pain burned her chest as she kissed and bit him, while pushing his arms away.
âShut upâ She hissed, as the humiliation from the memories took over her mind. The shame of giving and never asking for more. Of being taken and left without any rest. Pulling his pants open she stroked him impatiently, doing just enough to get him going. It wasn't difficult, as he was the only man she ever slept with, knowing his habits and body more than she'd care to admit.
Her nails raked over his throat and chest, ripping a deep groan from his throat.
He didn't dare to ask, feeling and giving everything she wanted to take. Despite the burning, the physical attraction and need she felt was stronger, her arousal glistening and visible as she lined him up with her entrance, not caring enough to be slow or subtle as she sank down on him fully. A subtle moan pushed past her lips as she squeezed her eyes tightly, doing the same thing he used to.
His eyes were wide open, taking the beautiful sight of her on top of him, but the expression on her face made him hurt so badly, he thought he might not survive. He reached out, wanting her to look at him, but she refused, keeping her eyes squeezed tightly as she moved on top of him frantically chasing her release.
âY/Nâ He begged quietly, as her hands wrapped around his throat, squeezing to cause pain.
âI hate you. I hate you so muchâ She whimpered, as his fingers dug into her thighs.
âPleaseâ He whispered, and she let go of his throat, digging her nails into his shoulders.
Thomas wanted to reach out to wipe her tears away, but he knew she wouldn't let him.
So he leaned forward, his forehead pressing against her collarbone when he let out a shaky breath.
âI love youâ He whispered weakly, holding her tightly as she haven't stopped moving even for a second, brimming on the edge.
âI hate you. I fucking hate youâ She cried out, opening her eyes as she looked down at him, meeting his gaze. His eyes were half lidded but he didn't give up, staring and repeating like mantra.
âI love youâ kept spilling from his lips as she reached her peak, causing him to follow right after as they reached the release.
His head fell forward, tears escaping his tired eyes as she quickly got off of him, leaving him without a word.
***
Y/N was growing increasingly restless inside of the Arrow House. Her days had been filled with reading and finding activities to keep her sons occupied, which took less time than usual, as Thomas took every opportunity to spend time with them. There was one room she had only been in once prior on this visit. She shuddered at the memory of her desperate conflicted intimacy with Thomas. Y/N knew that room would hold a concentrated form of his presence and essence, even more so after that night. She wasnât sure if she felt strong enough to enter his sanctum again, but while Thomas was away on business and her boys were having their afternoon nap, the curiosity overcame her hesitation as she entered his space.
It was incredibly⊠him with deep mahogany furnishings and sumptuous emerald accents. During that night, she had paid no attention to the surroundings in the office - only to him and her inner emotions. Slowly she went deeper into his study, turning on a lamp at his desk. She could picture him here with those round glasses on, absorbed in matters of business both legitimate and less so. To the side of his desk was a small curio cabinet filled with antiquities and presumably family mementos. It hardly garnered a second thought from her until she noticed a figurine on the top shelf next to an old photograph of Thomas and his siblings. It was the figurine.
Before the war, before everything changed, she and Thomas would wander around Birmingham together - young and full of optimism. Both their families were poor and doing their best to survive in the cruel world, but they were the dreamers of their respective clans. He and Y/N often visited a certain shop that sold trinkets and collectables. Y/N yearned to be able to spend money on frivolous little objects like these one day. There was a specific figurine that she longed to own: a porcelain ballerina with graceful fingers and a white and pink lace ruffled skirt. She thought ballerinas were the most fairy-like women that walked the Earth. Of course neither of them could afford such a beautifully crafted figurine, but Y/N swore that one day they would walk in that shop and purchase her ballerina without a second thought to the cost.
That never happened, yet here it was, that same figurine she had seen so many years before sitting in Thomasâ curio cabinet in his most sacred space of his home. She didnât know what it meant, but she felt tears prick her eyes at the reminder of those beautiful days from their youth. If only they could be like that again. If only the war and the turmoil after it hadnât soured the tender young love they had known.
âI see you found your way back to my studyâ Thomasâ deep voice called from the doorway. Y/N was startled. She had been so lost in her memories and feelings that she hadnât noticed his presence. She shifted awkwardly.
âYeah, it seems like it.â She responded, glancing towards the curio cabinet. He slowly came up closer, a small grin on his face.
âWhat did you find?â Thomas asked, tilting his head to the side. Of course he knew what she saw, but wanted to hear it.
âI canât believe you remembered my ballerinaâ Y/N said, not meeting his gaze.
âI went back to the shop to get it, but old Mr. Jones said heâd sold it years before. It took some hunting, but I eventually found her. I was hoping to someday show it to you, but⊠seems like you found her instead.â
âWhy?â she questioned him in a small voice.
âBecause this is how I remember you. You always said the ballerina was like a fairy or goddess come to Earth, but to me⊠when I saw that ballerina figure, I saw you.â Y/Nâs eyes glistened with unshed tears as she glanced back towards the cabinet and then back at the man in front of her. Letting out a deep sigh, she wiped her eyes.
âWhy now? Why did it take you so long to⊠to do this? Anything. I waited so long and⊠and now it's too late, Thomas.â She said, looking at him with an expression that crushed him. Feeling his breath hitch painfully, he felt his throat tightening. He had grieved over losing her and now that Y/N was physically here, she had never felt more far away from him.
After looking into her eyes for a longer moment, Tommy grabbed her hand, slowly straightening it against his palm while the other one reached to his holster, pulling out his gun. Y/Nâs eyes widened, but his gaze remained locked on hers, not faltering.
Finally, he didn't feel the fear. Holding the loaded gun, he slowly shoved it into her smaller hand, aiming it forward before he closed his eyes. Pushing his forehead against the muzzle tightly, keeping her wrist upright.
âThen kill me.â He said out loud, the words hanging in the air for a moment. âBecause otherwise I will never let you go, no matter how hard you try.â
Thanks for reading lol bye
@iilovedonnatartt @gentlebeari @narlytude @garrison-girl-08 @chaimaarouaine11 @bruhidkjustwannaread @reiwanwan @immyowndefender @jbrownta @honeymoon8
@dannysankletattoo
You ever just... yell about #raymond leon??
TASTE OF SHAME
Thomas Shelby x Reader
Warnings: Dark!Thomas Shelby, manipulation, abuse, non-con/dub-con, gaslighting, violence
A/N: Sorry it took so long. I'm absolutely the worst. Another part coming in shortly
A/N2: COMMENT AND REBLOG PLEASE!
Y/N woke up feeling different than usual. The deep sense of looking forward to something was exciting. Was.. new. Y/N knew it was perhaps one of Tommy's games and not a gesture of kindness in any way, but the idea of going shopping with Ada was nevertheless exciting.
She woke up early, got appropriately dressed, and secretly hoped she wouldn't see him this day at all. It was supposed to be about her. Just today.
Only a bit before eight she went downstairs, slowly looking around to find out whether Mr. Shelby was still home or not. The Arrow house was awfully quiet, like always when Charlie was still sleeping. He wasn't a loud child, but his precious giggles were warming up the overall cold and soulless building enough to breathe some life into it. He was making it sufferable to live in.
Y/N was quiet, mindful not to wake him up as she smiled at the staff, nodding kindly while passing by. Hearing voices from the living room, she made her way through the doorways only to see Ada along with her husband, Freddie.
âGood morning, Y/Nâ The older woman said with a smile as soon as she saw her. The questioning glance followed after the greeting which made her chuckle. Before she could say something, her man spoke up himself.
âHe would never let the two of you go on your own. It was either me or John and Arthur, so trust me, Lady. It's a better choice as it is!â Freddie spoke with an amusing drama and thick Brummy accent, making his wife swat him in the shoulder jokingly.
âHe's not wrongâ She admitted, sighing, and glancing sideways at her husband.
Y/N nodded lightly, smiling at the genuine contact between the two of them. It was refreshing and.. comforting, to see a glimpse of real love in the hollow walls of the Arrow House.
âIt's okay. I don't mind at allâ She reassured, gratefully. Her cheeks were rosy with excitement. âI really appreciate the two of you taking me to the city. It's been... A while.â
Ada winked at Y/N before coming up closer and grasping her hands.
âLovely then. I'd never say no to shopping with one of the ladies! It's the best time. Especially that we have a set of hands to carry our bags, indeed!â
They chuckled lightheartedly, walking to the corridor to put on their jackets along with the rest of proper clothing. Luckily, the day was nice enough to not need an umbrella.
âLet's get to it thenâ Y/N said as Freddie opened the door, gesturing for them to go first. Leaving the building, Y/N managed to spare one last glance towards the black, wooden door barely visible from the doorway. Mr. Shelby's office.
~~
The day was going well. Genuinely, for the first time in a long time she could honestly say it. Laughing out the tension which has been slowly gathering on her mind felt wonderful and the company of Ada and Freddie just reminded her how much she missed the careless giggles and fast heartbeat she used to feel back then.
Back when she wasn't someone's belonging. A selfish whim.
Buying all the gear was fun, trying it on and posing even more. Especially once they were done, and Ada suggested buying more clothes.
âWe shouldn't,â Y/N said quietly, grabbing Ada's forearm lightly. The older woman rolled her eyes, narrowing them.
âCome on, Y/N. We're spending his money. The least he can do is pay for us!â She let out a laugh which held the mischievous hint, one she shared with all of their brothers. No matter how similar or different Shelby siblings were, they all had it.
She thought for a moment, feeling the unpleasant worry again. Her feelings were raw and visible in her eyes, fully on display as always.
âI don't know,â She said, quietly, stopping in her tracks. Ada picked up on the way her voice broke just a little bit. Moving closer she grasped her shoulders.
âI mean it. Plus, he literally GAVE me money to pay for our stuff.â She was convinced. âTommy is my brother, Y/N. He knows me well enough to know better than assuming I'd buy just the necessities.â Y/N shifted uncomfortably, searching in her gaze for the truthfulness to sooth her own anxiety. Looking in Ada's blood irises, she found it. But she wasn't sure just yet. â...and Thomas loves everything about horses ever since he was a little boy. He's well aware of how much the gear would cost, honey. Yet he gave us way more.â This time her voice carried less humour, wanting to give her the comfort she needed along with reassurance.
Finally, Y/N nodded slowly, looking around and noticing that Freddie gave them some space to talk, stepping aside to smoke a cigarette yet paying attention enough to keep them safe.
Her gaze danced along the shops with bright and bold letters above the entrances, designed to encourage wealthy women to come in and spend their money. Eventually she met her friend's blue eyes again.
âOkayâ She agreed, letting out a chuckle as Ada clapped happily before grabbing her hand and pulling them towards the luxury shop.
âHere we come!â She squealed and Freddie just shook his head with amusement, following them closely.
It took about half an hour to get her going. At first it was the Shelby sister who twirled between the alleys in the fairly big shop, touching and gasping over the beautiful creations. All kinds of materials, hundreds of breathtaking colours with even more breathtaking cash tags attached to them made Y/N feel uneasy, but with time... Ada's enthusiasm infected her too.
So they both giggled like young girls, trying dresses on, making funny gestures and blushing furiously as they saw themselves in the big mirror. So unused to such a luxury, Y/N's eyes shone brightly when she saw the girl in her own reflection. So different from the one she used to see a couple long months ago.
âWe're absolutely getting this one,â Ada said suddenly, ripping her out of the train of thoughts. Slowly gazing over the creation, Y/N let out a sigh, picking on the cuticles of her fingers. Looking down she swayed lightly, biting her lower lip, but before she managed to speak up, Freddie joined his wife.
âI must agree,â He said, keeping his expression serious before Ada elbowed him in the side lightly. âYou look like a real high class lady now,â He added, less formally with a small smirk, grasping Ada's hand.
Y/N blushed, so unused to any kind of male attention.
âThank you. I hope he won't be mad.â The other part of the sentence was said quieter, almost to herself, but unfortunately all of them heard.
Plastering a fake smile onto her lips, she went back to change before they checked out, and got on the way as it was already fairly late. Clouds thinned one the sky, letting everyone see the glimpses of sunset kissing the horizon in a manner so dreamy, Y/N couldnât help the little smile on her lips as she watched the whole scene through the window. Shopping took a bit longer than expected, as Ada planned out the whole day, making them visit all the ladies' favourites in the city centre. After coffee and sweet souvenirs from the local bakery, they took a walk around the better part of Birmingham before heading back. Around fifteen minutes it took, before Freddie was parking the car on the gravelly driveway. Sighing, Y/N looked down at her hands, knowing the great day was pretty much over now that she was here. Slowly, she moved to get out of the car, grabbing a few of the bags as Ada and her husband did the same.Â
The Shelby sister noticed the shift in the air as she moved closer to Y/N rubbing her shoulder with a half smile.
âIt was a wonderful day, wasnât it? We need to do it again soon.â She said, before dramatically lowering her tone. âNext time definitely just us, without any of them,â She gestured towards Freddie with a chuckle, taking the edge off a bit as the tension loosened.
Y/N nodded, agreeing immediately as she loved the idea of having a way out every now and then. Wordlessly they walked up the stairs, greeting one of the maids after making the entrance. She took Y/Nâs coat, hanging it for her once she realized Mr. and Mrs. Thorne werenât staying.Â
âOnce again, thank you for the outing. Iâm looking forward to the next time,â The younger woman said with a genuine honesty in her voice, revealing how much it actually meant to her.
âAnytime,â Freddie responded, winking as he grasped Adaâs hand once she hugged Y/N.
âOf course.â She added, turning around as they started walking away before stopping once again, âOh, and tell Tommy youâre home already, will you?â And with that, they were gone.Â
Y/N considered seeking out Tommy right then, but she was tired from the outing and wanted to change into a more comfortable dress to lounge at home. Once in her room, she was increasingly tempted by her soft inviting bed. As soon as she settled in her soft sheets all her new things still in the shopping bags became distant memories, just like the thought of making her way to Mr. Shelbyâs office. Exhaustion overtook her tired mind and before she knew it, she fell asleep.Â
Hours passed, and on the other side of the house, Thomas was sitting by his desk. A half empty glass of whiskey stood to his left, as he slowly sipped on it with no rush. He lost count of all the paperwork heâd done today and the end was still nowhere to be seen. Taking off his glasses, he rubbed his eyes which became tired from all the reading and writing.Â
Suddenly the silence of the room got interrupted by quiet footsteps right by the door. Tommy glanced at the clock, realizing how late it already was. Without knocking the door knob turned as the wooden door gave way to a familiar silhouette.Â
Y/N rubbed her eyes, as she walked in. Her feet bare against the cold floor which wasnât too pleasant, yet useful in a way to keep her awake.Â
He watched wordlessly, after putting his glasses back on. As she slowly moved from the doorway towards his desk, eventually slumping into the armchair. She avoided his eyes, feeling guilty with the unintentional disobedience.
So the silence stretched into longer seconds as she picked on the hem of her dress.Â
âHad fun?â His voice cut the air eventually, seeing how she struggled with finding anything to say. It was hoarse from the lack of talking for many hours, even lower than usual which she found intimidating.
But on the other hand, was there anything about him which wasnât intimidating to her? The answer was obvious.
âIâm sorry I didn't come right away. We were late, and.. And I was tired. Before I realized it, I was sleeping.â She said quieter, feeling as she was walking on thin ice that might break at any given moment, pulling her into the freezing, cold water. The stillness that never ceased to surround him was terrifying at times. To her, Thomas Shelby was a complete mystery. His way of carrying himself reminded her of a volcano, so still and quiet just to blow up with a never ending stream of force. So the silence was⊠chaos really. âIâm sorry, Mr. Shelbyâ
Her voice, so quiet and submissive, danced around his mind. Mixing with the whiskey he drank, twisting and moving in different directions and causing the weird stirring he felt. Something that started becoming familiar, dangerously enough. His lips stretched into a small grimace, not quite enough to become a proper smile. Another thing that made him, him. All the small things she learned to become aware of, cautious and deliberate while slowly walking between the mines in his head. The boundaries that were constantly in motion for any kind of comfort, making it impossible to learn their placement. So she walked through the dark.
âI asked if you had fun, Dove,âÂ
His voice came out soft, at least softer than expected which almost made her gasp in a way. Her eyes flickered up, meeting his cold gaze. His eyes never seemed to lose the ice, but every now and then the blizzard seemed more gentle. She looked at him for a moment, her eyes wide, moving around his features.
âYes, it was a.. A great day.â
He leaned forward, moving a bit closer with a sigh.Â
âIt makes me sad that you donât listen, Dove.â He started off, making her feel bad. âBut I'm willing to forgive you, yeah? You didnât mean to be bad after all.â His voice was soothing, smooth like butter, to which she nodded eagerly, also leaning forward, subconsciously wanting to please him.
âYes, I didnât mean to. Iâm sorry,â
The corner of his mouth twitched again.
âI know you are,â He sighed, letting his gaze drop onto her body. Slowly moving lower till the desk blocked his view on the rest. âYou will start coming to my office again. Spending time with Mr. Shelby,â The words would suggest it was a suggestion, but his voice absolutely proved to her it wasnât one. He told her what would be happening from now on, and she had to listen. Y/N remained quiet for a bit before clearing her throat.
âOkayâ She mumbled in her typical manner. His gaze was making her feel almost naked despite the appropriate clothing she wore. Instinctively she covered herself a bit more, almost making him groan.
The little things she was doing. The pink blush dusting her cheeks as she squeezed her thighs together, along with the innocent body language caused the familiar stirring in his core again. Thomas sighed, feeling as his manhood grew in his briefs and skin became hot. Breathing a little deeper, he leaned back.Â
Tension in the room thickened as the shame coated her mind at the way he looked at her.Â
Getting up abruptly, she moved behind the armchair.
âI will.. Go to sleep. Iâll come to your office tomorrow, I promise.â Y/N stuttered out as she started walking back towards the door. Thomas tilted his head up, watching as her hips swayed as she walked. Letting out a deep breath he nodded, tutting.
âY/Nâ He stopped her in a raspy voice, but she didnât turn around to meet his gaze. âDonât forget to take your bags from the living room,â Thomas added, picking up the still lit cigarette, as he threw it into the fireplace. She just nodded, twisting the doorknob as she left.
Thomas stared at the dark wood of the door, as his fingers wrapped around the soft material in his pocket. Soft, pink lace.
He could say a lot about Y/N, but he had to admit she had a good taste in the lingerie she bought.Â
@mrsnms @randomcreator-09 @omgsuperstarg @hatethis29 @usaguisenpaisblog @priyajoyy @vanessyyyu @hottestgirlintheworld @iilovedonnatartt @hagarsays
I CAN'T FIND IT CAN SOMEONE SHOW ME PLSSS
CILLIAN MURPHY MASTERLIST
DAMON SALVATORE MASTERLIST (coming soon)
COMMENT TO BE TAGGED IN EVERYTHING
BETTER LATE THAN NEVER
Teenage!Tommy Shelby x Teenage!Reader
Summary: One kiss and plenty of definitions to the meaning of it. Did it even have one? Y/N and Tommy seem to have different opinions on the matter.
Warnings: a bit of angst, swearing, violence, jealousy
A/N: interact please!!
~~
"Aren't you mad?! He was... Standing so close to her! How dare he!" Eleanor everything but yelled, pacing back and forth in her bedroom after she watched through the window how the middle Shelby brother chatted with Margaret on the street, while she was almost all over him. El was red from anger, hating when someone disrespected her dearest friend. Y/N on the other hand was sitting by the vanity table, curling her hair and sighing deeply at Eleanor's words.
"Well... We're not together, he's free to do whatever he pleases." She replied, trying to keep her voice in a stable line. Hearing her friend's dramatic gasp, she rolled her eyes and turned around to face her. "El, I'm serious."
"but he kissed you! Just four days ago! How can you not be angry?" She asked with disbelief, but Y/N shook her head and grabbed her hands.
"El, let's just enjoy this night out, okay? You know my father's not fond of letting me go often. And maybe, just maybe we'll show him what he lost, hmm?" She suggested, trying to soothe Eleanor's anger a little.
The other girl just sighed, fixing her hair in the mirror for the last time before glancing back at Y/N.
"Okay. Let's show him"
Less than twenty minutes later they got to the destination.
As soon as they arrived at Y/N father's pub, all guests started nodding with respect, knowing what her surname was, and that she was not to be messed with. Shortly after arriving both girls got their drinks even though it was illegal to sell them to women without a man by their side, yet the bartender knew better than to argue. Irish music was playing loudly, and people mostly danced, drank and laughed loudly, having a great time.
Y/N's and Eleanor's friends already took a seat by the big table, greeting them happily. Time was passing quickly, half an hour later a group of boys barged in, knowing them as the local troublemakers. Mostly Shelby's.
Eleanor immediately glanced at Y/N giving her a silent nod as she went ahead to grab more drinks. Y/N herself couldn't complain about boredom, especially because she caught the eye of David, a boy who was a year older, going to the same school as she was. He was kind and mostly a gentleman. Even though the glances he was sending her cleavage didn't go unnoticed.
He was smart, despite his little self obsession. Talking about his hobbies, asking about hers occasionally, but mostly she was nodding along. Y/N was well aware of Thomas' presence in the pub, so when David started leaning in for a kiss eventually, she also did. Letting out a quiet sigh in anticipation she braced herself for the kiss... That never came.
Instead, she could hear a loud thump of a body hitting the floor and as soon as she opened her eyes, she saw Tommy standing above David, giving him some solid bruises. Her eyes widened with another delivered punch, when the weaker boy's nose cracked.
"Tommy!" She squealed, pulling on his arm. He ignored her for a minute, only when she yelled again did he notice her holding him. As he looked back, she pulled him out of the pub immediately.
"What the fuck are you doing! Are ya mad?!" She yelled, punching him in the chest. He furrowed his brows angrily.
"Me?! What was THAT!" He pointed at the door, leaning down to her level so they could argue properly.
"What?" She asked, playing dumb. Y/N was quite a little actress. He groaned with annoyance, running a hand through his hair before looking back at her.
"I thought we were dating butâbut you were.. all over him!" He said in an accusatory tone, pointing at her. Y/N gasped at the gesture, swatting his hand away.
"We're not dating!" She responded in a confident voice, looking into his eyes for a reaction. He glared at her for a second before huffing in anger.
"We bloody kissed! I kissed you!"
"it was just ONE kiss, Tommy! It happens!" She tried to convince both him and herself, keeping her cool almost too well.
He on the other hand folded his arms across his chest, taking a step forward.
"It was just one kiss?" Thomas repeated dumbly, and she nodded in an affirming way. He didn't say a word for a long moment and when Y/N glared at him with disappointment and grabbed the material of her longer dress to lift it and walk away, he stepped forward again.
Before she could react, his big, bloody hands got a hold of her cheek, pressing his lips against hers again, but this time the kiss was longer and he held her closer. More confident.
"There" He eventually said, slightly pulling away and looking down at her, still holding her cheeks. "Two kisses now. Now we're datin'" He said in a voice that does not indicate any opposition. Y/N's cheeks grew hot and it took her a second to collect her thoughts before he sighed with annoyance.
"Suddenly want to date now, do you? In the morning you were all over Margaret!" She said, pushing him away with renewed anger, pushing her hair out of her eyes. Tommy didn't let her step away though, grabbing her hands and pulling her back, wrapping her arms around his waist and holding them there.
"John broke her glasses." He said, caressing her cheek with a slight grin. "I was asking her to not tell on him to her mum, you know, Mrs Lanchester. Our teacher." He explained calmly, grabbing her chin and making sure she was looking in his eyes.
"Oh..." Y/N said, blushing even harder, causing him to smirk, to which she punched him again lightly. "Don't smile like that, Shelby!"
Thomas grabbed her hands, leaning down to kiss her knuckles as he smiled again, before leaning forward and stealing another kiss.
"Is three kisses enough to consider us dating or should I keep kissing you some more?" He asked, his blue eyes glistening with mischief and the feelings he held for her.
~~
"...later he went to war, and I waited. When your father came back, we got married. End of the story." Y/N said, blushing as she glanced towards her husband. Thomas was wearing his mischievous grin, while kids giggled in the background.
"Dad punched that guy!" Twelve year old William chuckled, and little George just cheered along with his older brother.
"He was a cunt anyway" Tommy mumbled, and Y/N shoved him lightly.
"Language!" She said scolded, putting a hand on his thigh under the table. "David was just... Being nice." She responded, to which her husband raised his eyebrows in annoyance.
"Shush, woman" He said, giving her a demanding kiss.
"Oh, stop it!" Fifteen year old Madeline groaned with disgust. "Tell me more instead! How did he ask you to marry him, mum?" She asked curiously.
"Well. He took me to a very special place, fell on one knee... And asked me." Y/N added, smiling wildly at the memory.
"...at least this time he asked." Madeline said with irony, smiling mischievously towards her dad, in the exact same way he usually did.
"Watch it" He warned jokingly.
"Better late than ever" Y/N said, squeezing her husband's thigh and looking at him with love.
We missed you đ
Lol thanks