I Loved When She Said That Line!

Alpha-17 and Obi-Wan being friends (derogatory) on 17's part and friends (threatening) on Obi-Wan's part is such an underrated dynamic

They could be so funny and terrifying, like Obi-Wan went through a soul shredding experience with Alpha-17 as his only company. They're friends because what else are you gonna be after you witness each other at absolute rock bottom from torture.

It's like 'dog put in cage of cheetah who's threatening to go crazy', except the dog is a grizzly bear and also threatening to go crazy.

Emotional support trooper except the trooper in question has never done any sort of supporting in his life and is actively an emotional distress trooper to a great number of the CC batch.

I want them texting everyday, I want Obi-Wan mailing handmade BFF bracelets to Alpha and Alpha sending pics back of him flipping off the camera but still wearing them, I want Alpha using Obi-Wan to keep track of and occasionally terrorize his cadets, I want 17 ending problems in the GAR (like Krell) before they begin because Obi-Wan has him shipped out on a personal transport at the first opportunity, decked out with slug-throwers Obi-Wan got him for his decant-day.

Natborn officers think this is all just an odd indulgence of General Kenobi, the Vode, however, correctly identify it as a goddamn threat and their danger assessment of Obi-Wan ticks up significantly.

When Alpha arrives on Kamino, Shaak Ti presses a shiny new comm into his hand. It has the Jedi Order symbol painted onto it alongside a smiley face sticker, and it pings immediately with a new message: Hello! I hope you're settling in well!

Alpha stares at the message, stares at the singular contact named 'OWK' and then stares Shaak Ti in the eye as he pitches the comm straight into the ocean. Shaak Ti's serene smile only grows larger as she calmly reaches into her robes and pulls out an identical comm, only this one has a frowny face sticker, and presses it into his hand. It lights up: I'm afraid we've bonded, Alpha :). Alpha shuts it off and pockets it with resignation.

Cody arrives on Alpha-17's personal recommendation.

A-17: He's the most difficult little bastard I have. You're perfect for each other. OWK: Thank you, he's very handsome :3 A-17: No. Stop.

The first thing he asks once he gets comfortable is who his general is texting so much that has him swinging his legs and twirling his hair. Cody assumes it's Anakin, given they seem joint at the hip anyway, but little does he know Obi-Wan's ability to consistently have the Weirdest Relationships Ever.

"Oh, it's Alpha-17, I understand you're familiar with each other?" Hmm. OK. Cody.exe is experiencing a processing error, please hold. He exits the room instead of answering. The next day he peeks over the General's shoulder when he's texting and sees walls of rambling messages from Obi-Wan. Alpha-17 replies every hour with a single text: Lose this number. Obi-Wan giggles. "He's so funny." he says.

When Obi-Wan meets the rest of the CC batch, Cody makes sure to stand perfectly angled so that he can record the reactions when his general cuts off their introductions with "Oh, no need, Alpha-17's told me all about you." It's always immediate FEAR.JPG followed by a slow spiral of What The Fuck.

What do you mean by that General. What does that mean Cody. What do you mean they text. No. Cody. What the fuck is happening, Cody. Alpha-17 doesn't have friends he has enemies and enemies he tolerates enough not to shoot on sight.

OWK: Wolffe reached for his vambrace? when I mentioned you A-17: That's where he keeps his spare knife. OWK: Hm that does explain the way he eyed me up, ambitious. A-17: Clearly not enough, he should have followed through. I taught them better.

🌈

For the ask game:

Supercorp fic where Lena runs a popular webseries/blog about plants and plant care and Kara (one of her avid subscribers) is absolutely hapless when it comes to keeping plants alive and is constantly asking Lena for help only to fail spectacularly. Lena is *convinced* Kara is fucking with her on purpose, and kinda sorta hates her virtual guts

Lena isn’t naive.

When she made the decision to set up a discord server for her plant vlog’s followers, she knew there was a possibility things might get messy. After all, even while remaining anonymous — she can practically hear her PR team screaming at the idea of Lena Luthor running her own verified social media account — her comment section has always been 45% earnest compliments and questions from beginner botanists and 55% unabashed thirst over her sexy hands and soothing voice. Lena imagined any possible frustration caused by having to sidestep the occasional untoward overture would be worth the satisfaction she gets from teaching fellow hobbyists to take better care of their plants. It’s nice to feel like she’s being appreciated, for a change, to be allowed to play hero in a small way, different from L-Corp’s high-stakes idealism or Supergirl’s histrionic stunts.

(She still hasn’t managed to set up a meeting with National City’s super-powered alien in residence, but she’s certain it will be any day now.)

Lena couldn’t have predicted that the most aggravating individual on her server wouldn’t turn out to be a persistent suitor, but rather a member of the plant-loving minority.

If the violence this ‘Kvers’ person routinely inflicts on their houseplants can be considered love.

Why are my plant’s leaves yellowing? had been this idiot’s first, innocuous ask. Moments later, they’d followed it up with a picture of the brown, crisp remains of what Lena had only vaguely recognized must at one point have been a vibrant green ZZ plant.

Because it’s fucking dead, Lena had wanted to reply, suggesting instead Is it possible it’s near a window where it gets too much direct light?

My place does get a good amount of sun, Kvers had responded. I kind of prefer it that way. Lena had given her a list of plants that would fare better in those conditions, and hoped that would be that.

But it didn't end there; it’s actually only gotten worse. Kvers is in Lena’s notifications what feels like every other day now with fresh doubts and queries. Why do you even have plants, Lena is tempted to respond half the time, when it’s obvious you’re too much of a moron to even be trusted to take care of yourself?

Are banana plants supposed to tear this easily? comes the next question, combined with a picture of a Dwarf Cavendish that looks to have been ripped to shreds by a wind stronger than the average tornado.

“What the fuck,” Lena mumbles to herself. Some tearing is to be expected, they’re pretty frail, she replies, before snapping and adding I advise placing it a little further away from that jet engine you must have set up in your living room, however in a disgruntled huff.

Kvers sends her only a 😳 in response.

A fresh victim is presented to her a few days later, along with Kvers’s desperate plea of Can this little guy still be saved?

Pictured is the saddest Boston fern Lena has seen in her entire life: it’s bruised grey-brown and beige where it should be a vivid emerald, and when Lena clicks the image to enlarge, she finds herself frowning at what looks like a dusting of frost still clinging to the fronds.

Ferns can recover from freezing conditions but only if their roots weren’t also affected, Lena replies very professionally, her fingers shaking with silent outrage. Though I don’t understand why you’d keep a potted fern outdoors when it’s that cold. She’s beginning to wonder if this Kvers person is a genuine imbecile or an abusive prankster. Where do you live that you’re dealing with these weather conditions in August? she demands.

Oh, um, Kvers replies and then, after a few starts and stops, Southern California.

So Kvers is absolutely fucking with her.

It takes a week before they’re asking for Lena’s input again. This buddy is looking a little rough today, they post, do you think a good soak could help perk it back up?

The miserable money tree pictured is barely clinging to life. Lena peers through the furious red haze descending over her vision and swears it looks like its few remaining leaves are singed.

Lena’s patience has run out. Are you serious? she asks. Did someone burn your building down?

Small kitchen accident Kvers has the audacity to reply.

It’s the final straw in every sense of the word. Lena will not stand for this blatant abuse a moment longer, especially if it’s done exclusively for the purpose of getting her attention. Before she can think too much about it, before her rage recedes, she sends Kvers a direct message announcing she’s coming by for a home consultation.

Where in SoCal are you exactly?

As it turns out, Kvers is right here, in National City.

She’s also a bafflingly attractive — though fidgety — blonde.

Blue eyes widen and pink lips part when she answers the door, her shoulders so broad and her arms so beefy she takes up most of the space in the doorway to her loft. Lena probably wouldn’t be able to see past her, at her endangered plants beyond, if she still wanted to.

But she can tell her loft is well-lit, like she’d mentioned — she’s framed by the sun’s dying rays, her hair and skin golden and shimmering in a way not entirely of this earth.

This explains so much, Lena realizes, relieved. The wind. The frost. The burns.

Her would-be adversary is wearing glasses and her hair is up, and her flustered demeanor seems so awkwardly genuine that Lena wonders if the image this woman projects when she’s dressed in her more familiar reds and blues is the act — if this awestruck, faded-jeans-clad cutie is the real person that’s hiding underneath.

She looks far more human than Lena would have imagined.

“You’re Lena Luthor,” she finally manages to stutter out.

Lena regards her evenly. “Good to finally meet you,” she says, and, dropping her voice a little, “Supergirl.”

Craziest hcs for commander cody or hcs no one would expect for him please & much thankyouness🧡

Craziest headcanons for Commander Cody (or hcs no one would ever expect) lmaoooo I don’t know if these are crazy but they’re what I got

Commander Cody is absolutely the funniest Commander there is

Going from that, it’s because he’s unhinged. Everyone would expect it to be Wolffe with his teeth, Bly with his lovesick tendencies or even Fox with his deadpan humor, but Between having to deal with Obi-Wan “I’m going to flirt with every enemy I have and lose my lightsaber” Kenobi and Anakin “violence mwahahahha” Skywalker, Cody had to compensate

Alongside that, he was Obi-Wan’s Commander when Anakin was still a Padawan so at that point, it was either babysit Anakin or be just as unhinged to pull him back

Anakin still can never get anything past Cody

His raised eyebrow has Anakin spilling secrets faster than anything Obi-Wan ever could have done

Cody hates tea. He hates it with a passion and it’s only because he’s friends with Obi-Wan that he doesn’t automatically spit it out

That being said, since Anakin also hates tea, whenever Cody thinks Anakin needs a punishment, he’ll just give him tea and raise an eyebrow

He still does it even when Anakin is a General

Cody started kicking droids when he had to save Obi-Wan from an attack and he had no blasters and a broken hand

It was worth it

Anakin jokes that he was part droid since it never seemed to hurt him and he replied back with “I mean you could with your robotic arm”

Obi-Wan had to discourage Anakin from punching droids

Cody eggs him on when Obi-Wan isn’t looking

Cody knew about Padme and Anakin’s secret marriage within the first week he met Anakin

He let Anakin know with a “I hope you treat her well” when Anakin finished his knighting trials

Cody made sure that Rex was put Captain of the 501st because he knew Anakin would watch his back

Also he wanted to see how long it would take for Rex to break out of the fold of not being good enough because of his blonde hair

Cody once put itching powder in Wolffe’s blacks when he got back from the Malevolence incident to distract him and get him out of his room

It worked

Cody had a black eye for two weeks

Wolffe thanked him later in the war for it because he didn’t know if he would have continued on or tried to March on with his Pack

Ponds tried to explain to Mace Cody’s humor only for the man to say “I see”

Cody made sure to never joke around Mace so that Ponds would seem crazy by his General

He ended up breaking that silent dare when Boba tried to attack Mace

He scooped up the cadet (Boba’s not a cadet but he’s the size of one so Cody doesn’t think it matters all that much) and said “sorry cadet but we have a height restriction. No one shorter than 4 feet is allowed near a Jedi”

Boba hisses like a cat at him and tries to scratch him

“I’m older than you!”

“I’m taller than you.”

He ended up bringing Boba on the ship to avoid the Chancellor from putting him on trial

Boba didn’t appreciate it until Cody gave him a gun and took him on a “specs” mission

It wasn’t a real mission but Cody wasn’t gonna tell Boba that

“Shoot those droids and well leave when you’re not angry anymore”

They didn’t leave till 6 hours later

Boba tried to run away 12 times during his stay with Cody and Cody caught him all 12 times

The 13 time, Cody just gave him a blaster and said the 212th will be there for him if he needs it

Boba didn’t leave despite the opening

He now hangs in the vents and protects the ship when they’re on the ground

Cody owns a handmade slingshot

He uses it to pelt Rex and other clones when he’s bored or annoyed at them

He used it once on Fox and Fox got him back with his own slingshot

He once stole one boot from each of his batchmates at the beginning of the war after they got their paint on it

He wears them when he feels nostalgic

He stole one of Rex’ when he become Captain of 501st

He used to jump out of ships when Anakin was a Padawan to help teach him to catch him before he would splat on the ground

This is why Anakin does it to Rex because he thought since Rex is close to Cody, he wouldn’t mind

Rex does mind

A lot

He never figured out that Cody was the one to ingrain this habit in Anakin

Cody would still jump out of ships if the 212th and the 501st work together

Cody can do a handstand and can even balance on one hand

He believes this to be his greatest achievement

Cody likes to window shop

It’s inconvenient to do when they are at war but if there’s a shop nearby where the 212th is stationed, he’ll get souvenirs for his batchmates

Cody does not get paid yet he still somehow has credits

This is because he made a deal with Hondo to give him credits and he’ll tell him where the best rum is

This is why Hondo kidnaps Obi-Wan a lot

When Cody heard about Obi-Wan “dying”, he didn’t believe it and just told Rex to tell him when Obi-Wan is back - after all, it was his shore leave

The first time Cody met the Bad Batch was on Kamino and it was on complete accident

He ran into them with Nala Se and from their face, he could only assume that she was about to decom them

He stepped in

She let him train them for two weeks to improve their scores and during that time, he got them to work as a team but most importantly, to realize that they are vod as well and vod stick together

He gave them Fox’ and his own personal comm number in case they ever needed anything

He also makes sure to include them in his souvenir gift list

(He’s also the reason Crosshair is a Swiftie skjskjskj - I’m sorry I had to add that in)

He considers Echo and Fives his little cousins due to Rex adopting them and spoils them whenever he sees them

Meaning he tells them all the best prank ideas and covers for them and gives them any item they ask for when they meet

He is the reason they got away with dying Rex’ hair blue

As well as Anakin’s

And Obi-Wan’s

But he’s too smart for them and switched their bottles with his and they ended up accidentally dying their own hair when they targeted him

Cody will barge into Fox’ office randomly when he’s on shore leave and forcibly get Fox to rest

He’ll bribe the other Commanders with alcohol when he comes

Thorn is an expensive Vod though and demands more than alcohol

He is the reason Cody had to start a little black market within the GAR

All that just to spend time with Fox

It’s worth it every time

Cody once tried to matchmake Bly and Aayla at the start of the war because he couldn’t stand their lovesick looks

Turns out they have been dating since Bly got assigned to her and they just are lovesick with each other

Cody almost lost his lunch when he realized

Cody likes to check up on his batchmates when he can

And his batchmates’ Generals

And his batchmates’ General’s Padawan

This is how he was able to talk to Barriss before she did anything risky

He got Gree involved and they got her reassigned after being made a knight to a post where she can help clone medics with civilians and Vod

It wasn’t much but it was enough for her to feel like she is doing something right

He tries to check up on her when he can though Gree is the one she mainly talks to

Cody once convinced his batchmates to eat a bug after Anakin kept doing it as a Padawan

Cody also once drugged Obi-Wan when he stayed up a consistent 78 hours on a campaign

Cody has a count of how many times Obi-Wan has lost his lightsaber and his robes and has flirted with the enemy

Cody once punched Quinlan Vos in the stomach because the Jedi snuck up on him

Obi-Wan laughed

Quinlan got him back when he accidentally dropped one of Cody’s bottles of rum for Hondo

They had a prank war for a solid 7 months before Fox shut it down because he got caught in one of Cody’s brilliant ideas

On the bright side, it revealed Palpatine as a Sith

On the down side, he ended up losing control to the chip and being knocked into a coma for 4 months to finally gain back control

Yea that’s all I have ( @here-comes-the-moose if you don’t mind, i borrowed your HC of Crosshair being a Swiftie and mentioned it here)

Feel free to add your own if you want

Yeah, still good.

Canon Divergence (Starikov!AU)

After the Lex’s attack, Supergirl and Lena found a weakened Red Daughter

She was left behind the building like some kind of trash, useless and uninteresting for brilliant mind.

- Damn, just look at her, - whispered Lena. She couldn’t take her eyes from bleeding face. The doppelganger was obviously in pain and disoriented. Blood was dripping from her forehead and chin. Lena felt a wave a nausea.

- She’s exhausted and now as mortal as any man on Earth, - noticed Supergirl. It was hard for saw yourself in such state. - Let’s take her from both side. There, help me. We need to take her to the DEO.

- No way. L-corp is closer and it’s safe for her. DEO will imprison her without a trial or worse, - argued Lena. - After all, she attacked the White House.

- Exactly. She is dangerous and delusional. Why do you trust her?

- Because I know what it is like to be betrayed by Lex. Hey, - she called out the Russian, who looked like she was ready to lost her conscious. - We’ll help you. It’s gonna to be okay, I promise.

Well, look at this as a prequel for previous art

I think, therefore I am (exhausted)

The Clone War was obviously a very stressful time for most beings in the galaxy. Most of all, the clones - and the last thing any jedi wants on their hands is a bunch of stressed soldiers running around. So, naturally, General Kenobi thought up a way to help reduce the stress levels of not only himself, but his troops. I present to you: Yoga with General Kenobi.

- the thing with being in the middle of a galactic war meant that they were always on the move; sometimes it was unavoidable that the meetings had to be in the middle of a campaign. therefore there was no set place where they met, and they would instead do it wherever suited best at the time... be it an old battlefield, in the hanger, the troops' quarters and even sometimes (in emergency situations) on the bridge.

- after years of jedi training and meditation practice, obi-wan was quite a qualified instructor. the 212th particularly enjoyed it; it was a nice opportunity for them to take off their armour and stretch out in their blacks.

- obviously, commander cody was the best at it. they didn't know how exactly you can be the 'best' at yoga, but he managed it.

- one thing nobody was expecting however, was the dedication of boil to these sessions. he was always there right on time, armour off, ready to begin. no matter where they were, no matter if the other troopers weren't even aware of the meeting, he'd be there. sometimes his dedication even startled obi-wan.

- the sessions would usually start with the general asking them to sit down cross legged and close their eyes, which was always an amusing test of the clones' suppleness. (most of them preferred to sit with their legs out in front of them)

- there was never an ordinary session. obi-wan always remembers that time they'd been in the middle of a downward dog and anakin walked into the room and just... stood there with a shocked face before backing out slowly.

- no less than 10 seconds later, none other than a very energetic fives burst into the room: "GENERAL SKYWALKER SAID YOU WERE DOING YOGA-"

- and from then on, when on missions together, it was inevitable that over half of the 501st would also join in (obi-wan had to find bigger spaces to do it, it was getting so crowded)

- cody managed to convince rex to join in once, and it resulted in so much teasing from echo and fives that he swore off yoga for life.

- wondering where all his troopers had disappeared to, anakin would search the base and surrounding areas until he found them, at which point hardcase's wild gesturing meant that he had to participate.

- despite being reluctant at first ("i've got THINGS to do-"), anakin soon discovered that yes, yoga was actually quite enjoyable, and it also equated to training as well, which resulted in him dragging along ahsoka.

- it would have been quite an amusing sight; walking into a room (or a field) of the finest republic soldiers completely silent and intently gazing at two jedi generals, one commander, and raising their arms above their heads whilst doing breathing exercises.

- as it happened, this did happen once, when they were stationed on coruscant. boil had been insistent that they continue the sessions (obi-wan had to admit, he had seen a drastic change in their flexibility) and spread the word.

- the clones collectively decided that the mess hall was the only space big enough, and began to move anything they could out of the way. after generals kenobi and skywalker had arrived, they began the session.

- as it happened, mace windu and master yoda needed to speak with obi-wan and anakin regarding new strategies, but they couldn't find them anywhere, nor any of their troopers. it was like they'd simply disappeared.

- after trundling around for quite some time, the two masters stumbled upon the mess hall, and what they saw when they opened the door made them freeze in their tracks.

- it was packed full of clones, armourless, on blankets and mats and anything else that was soft, in various positions, staring up at the front where obi-wan was demonstrating the scorpion pose, anakin was trying to clamber onto obi-wan's knees and see how long he could balance there, and ahsoka was staring at them, half concerned, half amused.

- nobody noticed the two masters silently watching as anakin toppled to the ground and obi-wan over balanced, flipping on top of him, whilst the hall erupted into laughter. every person in the hall looked free of stress in that moment: content, happy, simply enjoying not being on the battlefield for once.

- yoda and mace exchanged a glance; maybe the strategy talks could wait a while.

+Bonus