Hits That Poor Unsuspecting Employee With The Father Beam

hits that poor unsuspecting employee with the father beam

Hits That Poor Unsuspecting Employee With The Father Beam
Hits That Poor Unsuspecting Employee With The Father Beam

More Posts from Unstableplague and Others

4 months ago
This Is Truly The Funniest Timeline

this is truly the funniest timeline

4 months ago

My friends and I used to do this thing where we'd dress up on a theme and go do something totally normal.

We dressed up as pirates and went bowling.

We dressed as vikings and went to the grocery store. The security guard told us we had to move our longship because it was illegally parked.

We dressed as Romans and went to Blockbuster. The staff chanted, "toga! Toga! Toga!" at us.

We dressed up all steampunk and went to the museum. Tourists kept taking our picture.

1 year ago

When Klaus is asked if his brother is there and he looks to side and laughs and says they’re gonna have to be more specific? That scene is so funny to me. Ben is just laying there on the bed and winks and Hazel and Cha Cha have NO clue. It’s hilarious.

Also when Klaus was using his powers to talk to all the people Hazel and Cha Cha killed and Ben tells him he did a good job, in the background a few moments later Ben high fives a ghost beside him. I also found that to be really funny.

2 years ago

I'm a firm believer in the idea that Pyro doesn't naturally see in "Pyrovision," but that it's a side effect of their mask/the optics inside it. I feel like they still know what they're doing, though. The rest of the mercs very much know the reality of their job, although some of them see it in a slightly different perspective.

Sniper sees his job as assassinating those who deserve it — only killing people who are "rotten" (as described by his adoptive mother.)

[Image ID: a page from the Team Fortress 2 comics. The top panel shows Sniper, with a box at the top left indicating their location. It states: "God's Secret Base, Heaven." Sniper's dialogue reads: "But I don't want to go. I want to stay here. With you." The bottom left panel shows his adoptive parents. His mom responds, saying: "And we want ya ta stay, dear. But you left a lot of rotten @#$%s down there that need killin'." The next panel zooms in closer to Sniper's father, who says: "Yer mum's right. A professional wouldn't quit when there's still work to be done." The panel after shows Sniper, with his dad now out of frame, though his dialogue still continues with: "And you are a professional, son." The final panel shows Sniper's dad, putting a hand on his son's shoulder, and finishing his dialogue with: "Now get back there and give 'em Hell." / end ID.]

He says himself in the Meet The Sniper short that he isn't a "crazed gunman." He doesn't kill for the sake of killing, he only kills who he thinks should be killed. He's an assassin, it's an occupation. He does it for his job, and states that as a professional, he has standards.

[Image ID: a screenshot from the Meet The Sniper short that shows Sniper using a telephone. The subtitles at the bottom read: "Dad? dad I'm a- Ye- Not a 'crazed gunman,' dad, I'm an assassin!..." / end ID.]
[Image ID: a screenshot from the Meet The Sniper short that shows Sniper in his campervan. He is looking towards the camera, and saying: "Professionals have standards." / end ID.]

Heavy sees his job as getting rid of "evil men." When discussing taking back his job, he emphasizes that specifically. He isn't just killing anyone, he's killing those who are deemed the bad guys.

[Image ID: a page from the Team Fortress 2 comics. The top left panel contains dialogue from Zhanna, which reads: "Aw, Misha, you're our big brother!" Yana is on the lower right side of the same panel, with her own dialogue that reads: "You'll always look out for us, and we love you for it. But now you must let us look out for ourselves." The next panel shows Heavy, who is eating his food. The top right panel shows a conversation between Heavy and Scout. Heavy's dialogue reads: "This mission. It will be dangerous?" Scout then replies, saying: "Oh yeah it will!" Heavy responds with: "It pays well?" Scout replies: "Probably? I forgot to ask." The next text bubble from Heavy reads: "But there will be evil men? And we will destroy them?" Scout answers with: "Heck yeah!" The final panel is at the bottom, which shows a shot of everyone present in the room. Heavy's mother is in the foreground, with the rest of them in the background, situated around a table. Heavy shouts: "Then Heavy is back, babies!" Everyone around him is smiling, and Soldier pops in from the left, saying: "Hooray! I am back from the bathroom and everyone is happy!" / end ID.]

We also know he does all he can to protect his family, and his family knows this just as well. He only attacks when it is necessary for him and his family's safety, and/or will benefit them in some capacity. (He's gone through a lot and I feel like we as a fandom don't discuss that enough. I did an analysis over Heavy's past one time in a Discord server and I might post it here if anyone is interested.)

[Image ID: a page from the Team Fortress 2 comics. It shows a discussion between Heavy and his sisters. The top left panel has dialogue from Heavy, which reads: "Yana. Zhanna. Bronislava. I know it is hard. But the people who hurt us before... Who took us away... There will always be more like them. If I wasn't here... They would come. They would find you." Behind Heavy, we see an image of him and his family in a flashback. They are all running away from a burning North Siberian gulag. The next two panels are on the bottom left. The first contains dialogue from Bronislava, which reads: "Misha... Men have come." The next panel contains dialogue from Heavy, who is offscreen, that reads: "What?" Yana replies, saying: "While you were away in America. We did not want to worry you." The final panel is on the right side of the image, it shows Zhanna and Heavy next to one another at the table. Heavy says: "I see. You... But you probably did not make them suffer." Zhanna, who has her hand on Heavy's arm, replies: "Oh, Misha, we did. I promise you." Heavy responds: "You are just saying this." Zhanna replies with: "No, I swear! We butchered them like hogs. Their screams died on their lips." The rest of the dialogue comes from Heavy, it reads: "I see. I guess you are all grown up girls now. Big girls who do not need bossy old Misha anymore." / end ID.]

In the Meet The Pyro video, we see how they allegedly view the world. A fairytale-like place full of rainbows, bubbles, sparkles, and almost cherub-esque versions of the enemy mercs.

[Image ID: a screenshot from the Meet The Pyro short that shows Pyro in Pyroland. They are surrounded by flowers and are equipped with the Rainblower weapon, which is shooting out a stream of rainbows. / end ID.]
[Image ID: a screenshot from the Meet The Pyro short which shows Pyro in Pyroland. To the left are the BLU Scout and Heavy, who appear cherub-like due to Pyrovision. The Heavy is holding a large lollipop. The RED Pyro is on the right side of the frame, tilting their head and facing the viewer. / end ID.]

While it is very easy to just assume this is how they view everything naturally, I don't think it's ever been 100% confirmed that this is the case.

The biggest thing for me is the Pyrovision Goggles in-game. The fact that they can be worn by any class, and it effects all of the mercs the same way, makes me believe that it truly is a result of the optical mask/the lenses within them that makes Pyro see what they do. It would've been so easy to make this cosmetic only available to Pyro, but it isn't.

[Image ID: A screenshot taken from the Team Fortress 2 wiki of the page for the Pyrovision Goggles. It includes an image of a Red Spy with the goggles equipped to the far right side of the screenshot. The wiki description reads: "The Pyrovision Goggles are a cosmetic item for all classes. They are a pair of goggles with round lenses and the term "Optical Mask" printed in between them, reminiscent of the Pyro's gas mask. Bits of the Pyroland landscape can be seen reflected on the lenses.

When equipped, players are able to see in Pyrovision; map textures are replaced with those of Pyroland, gibs and pickups are replaced with their counterparts from birthday mode, low-violence mode becomes active, other players' voices become high-pitched, all players laugh when injured or killed, and certain Pyroland-only weapons and cosmetic items become visible or change model. However, the goggles will not change textures on some official maps, or any custom maps regardless of if they are using the original textures." / end ID.]

The fact the goggles includes the "optical mask" text in the center, much like Pyro's mask itself, just pushes the idea that Pyroland is all an optical illusion. Obviously it was never real in the first place, but I don't think it's how Pyro sees everything naturally.

[Image ID: a screenshot from the Team Fortress 2 wiki of Pyro's page. The text on the screenshot is slightly cropped, with some of the text highlighted for emphasis. The highlighted text reads: "They see everything as a magical fairy tale land, which Valve dubbed "Pyroland". In Pyroland, they see enemy players as small, round, flying babies, and their acts of killing and maiming them to the Pyro is nothing more than playing with them; however, their mask might be the cause of the Pyroland illusions. In front of the mask, it reads "Optical Mask". Optical illusions usually play tricks on your eyes and your mind, so the mask might play tricks on the Pyro's mind, thus causing Pyroland. This has been hinted by the Pyrovision goggles which were introduced after Meet the Pyro." / end ID.]

Tying back to the beginning of this post, I believe Pyro knows what they're doing. They know that they're spreading fire and not bubbles and rainbows. But perhaps they keep the mask on for the sake of their own psyche, to make it easier for them to do their job. Much like how Heavy and Sniper justify their jobs by seeing it as killing "evil men," or killing those who are "rotten," maybe Pyro uses their mask and goggles to tune out the dark truth of what they do. It could be yet another reason as to why Pyro never removes their mask.

1 year ago

HE DOES DESERVE TO GET ANGRY SO TRUE SO REAL

alright brother. any thoughts on spydad? (i hate it with my whole heart)

I like the idea of spy and scout having a unique/complicated relationship as a result of being related. I really do. But like, spydad in a “spy getting in the way of scout’s romantic relationships/being weirdly overprotective/etc” way has never been done in a way that doesn’t seem like a complete annihilation of Spy’s personality.

He would laugh at someone for stooping to the level of dating Scout of all people rather than threaten them for stepping near him. He cares for scout but he does also combat that with seven different layers of hating Scouts guts- half over-dramatic and half very genuine because scout is annoying.

also, I’ve mentioned it before, but any conversation that spy and scout have where spy finally admits the truth needs to end with scout getting to beat the shit out of him. Sorry. I want them to come to some form of resolution as much as most people but first things first I want to see them yell at each other and resolve nothing. And I want spy to try and save his ego and fail to apologize and I want to see scout just get mad at him. I think he deserves this!

1 year ago

I love Gale, he’s great.

So I was watching some videos of Gale’s epilogue discussions with a friendship/non-romanced Tav, and…oh my god, Gale…

So I Was Watching Some Videos Of Gale’s Epilogue Discussions With A Friendship/non-romanced Tav, And…oh

[Sorcerer] You confine yourself to the School of Illusion? I’d have thought you could teach the entire curriculum…

So I Was Watching Some Videos Of Gale’s Epilogue Discussions With A Friendship/non-romanced Tav, And…oh

Gale: I did offer, as a matter of fact.

So I Was Watching Some Videos Of Gale’s Epilogue Discussions With A Friendship/non-romanced Tav, And…oh

Gale: However, the Blackstaff insisted I couldn’t teach every subject, nor could the simulacra of myself I offered to create for that purpose.

————————

Blackstaff: Well Gale, we’d be honored to take you on as a professor. What subject would you like to teach?

Gale:

ALL OF THEM

1 year ago

I think it would be funny if c!tommy replaced tav in baldur’s gate just cause he would probably burn the entire place to the ground within hours and not even on purpose


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2 years ago

Can we actually talk about how insane it is that Simon removed his mask for the 141? Everything he’s been through has caused him to disassociate entirely from the person he is. He cannot bear to BE himself; to have Simon Riley be someone who exists and is acknowledged by others. He uses the mask to create his nonexistence; to become a weapon only focused on finishing his mission. With the mask, Simon Riley is dead. The only thing left is his “Ghost.”

By creating this barrier, he distances himself from his teammates emotionally and can convince himself that only the objective matters (see: abandoning Soap after Graves betrays them and calling it “a force of habit”).

Simon is not good with expressing his feelings. For example, he’s extremely worried about Soap during “Alone,” but shows it through jokes and talking to keep Soap calm. Any time Soap insists Ghost cares, the man immediately deflects and insists they are only “teammates” and that Soap needs to focus on his own self-preservation.

But we see afterwards that Ghost wants to make an effort to connect emotionally to his team; to show the 141 who “Simon” is, not just Ghost. For example, after Rodolfo assumes that Ghost would wait for his men and Soap begins to express his doubt, Ghost immediately jumps in and asserts that, yes, he would wait for them. He lets Soap know with his own words that he is there for his team. This is a rare instance where Ghost allows himself to be emotionally vulnerable and open, and it sticks out immediately to the player.

And finally, the ultimate showcase of trust: the removal of the mask. Simon rips away that last barrier of distance between himself and the 141. He affirms HIS existence and allows his teammates to see the true person underneath the mask. Price’s “Good to see you again, Simon,” only adds to the fact that this is “Simon” standing with them. In that moment, there is no “Ghost.”

Anyway, I just thought it was really touching. Simon is a deeply traumatized character, but he’s also someone who has bottled up that trauma so well that it can be hard to separate his two identities and their wants. I really hope his backstory gets touched on more in the next game (and please don’t fucking kill him right after that Activision lmao).

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unstableplague - Mercury
Mercury

arugh ham,,,borger,,,they/she/he 18+

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