Paratober 3 - Time
just imagine how stressed the jl would be after finding out that bruce has a biological son. he's batman, so of course, he's not going to get laid, right? then he introduces the new robin that acts and looks a lot like him and the jl malfunctions
Diana: So, he's not adopted?
Bruce: No, he's my son
Clark: How did you? How can you? How did this happen?
Hal: What Clark's trying to ask is, how did you get laid?
Clark: Especially with you brooding all the time
Bruce: It just happened
Diana: *Picks up Damian* He's quite cute
Damian, about to stab Diana: I am not cute
Diana, who is used to kids with a sword due to being raised on Themyscira: Oh and he's a warrior by heart
Little Archons!
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Batman being aggressively secretive towards the Justice League is one of my favorite tropes, but it gets INFINITELY funnier when you take the younger generations of heroes into consideration.
Barry Allen? He doesn't know shit about Batman, still partially convinced he's not human, still a little bit scared to talk to him. But Wally West? That's Nightwing's best friend. He's been around Dick since both of them were kids. He's had sleepovers at the manor since he was thirteen.
I just think it would be hilarious if all of the younger generations 100% know that Batman is Bruce Wayne. They've slept at the manor, some of them have taken various Batkids to school dances, they've been offered Alfred's cooking. And all because they've gotten close to at least one Batkid and said Batkid wore Bruce down until he let them reveal their identity. But all of them manage to keep this information from their mentors. Either purposefully or completely on accident.
Then you end up with a situation where the younger generations grow up and join the League and the older members Very Quickly realize that they seem a lot more comfortable with Batman than they should be.
The Narrator gets quiet in that room… I want him to keep talking…. I want to hear him say Stanley’s name again.
Hi SIG fans is this anything
SHIT LOAD of elevator hitch graphics I made for us!!
Anyone can use these, but please credit or reblog this post if you do lol
(How we used them on sp under cut for fun)
When there’s no doppel content sometimes you gotta make your own lmao
Also if you happen to see these on a post with no tags and a basically empty blog that’s mine ignore it lol I just wanted to post them here since I thought they were good enough
The no kill rule is not about Bruce just uwu not wanting to become a murderer it’s about knowing that no person is morally infallible and omniscient and you cannot be judge jury executioner and that you are allowed to keep this last bit of innocence that you do not have to live with the burden of someone else’s crime you shouldn’t have to give away a part of yourself just because someone else decides to commit a horrible crime it’s not about whether the Joker deserves death it’s about whether someone should bear the burden of becoming a murderer none of you fuckers know why the death penalty is bad
do you think a Batman who holds little kids to get them to safety can pick them up with the same two hands that took a life? Don’t they deserve better? Doesn’t he?
I know there are a lot of fanfics about Jason being caught by the Justice League and usually getting bailed out by the batfam, but imagine if it was Brucie Wayne bailing him out:
In the JL interrogation room:
Superman: Alright, Red Hood, who is your supplier helping you move drugs in Star City?
Red Hood, who was undercover investigating a drug ring and got caught in a JL bust and sesnses an opportunity to mess with Batman: Look, I know you guys aren't cops, but can I get at least get one phone call?
Justice league looking skeptical?
Red Hood: You can even monitor it.
Green Arrow: Fine one phone call, but it will be monitored.
Hands Hood a phone
Red Hood: Hey Dad, I got stopped by the Justice League. Could you come bail me out? Really, okay, see you soon. Okay, my Dad said that he would bail me, so could we go over to the teleporters?
Green Arrow: Okay, firstly, we aren't cops, you can't just post bail and get out. Secondly, how would this "Dad" get up here?
Red Hood: You'll see.
Minutes later, Brucie Wayne walks in with a trail of Heroes, trying to explain why he cannot be at the Watchtower.
Superman: Mr. Wayne what are you doing here and how did you get here?
Bruce laying the Brucie persona on thick: Well as one of the Justice League's biggest doners and tech suppliers I have access to the teleporters, as for why I'm here it's to bail out my son. Hi Jaylad!
Red Hood fully expecting Batman: What?
Green Arrow remembering his friend's grief over loosing Jason: Ummmm, Mr. Wayne this is the Red Hood. You know "Bag full of severed heads" Red Hood.
Brucie: Yes, I know he's had some issues with his big feelings, but he's still my sweet little boy.
Superman: And you think that he's your late son Jason Todd?
Brucie: Yes, Batman even confirmed it was him. It turns out that after he died, he was brought back by an organization that planned on using him as a weapon against Batman. But he left them and has been working to improve Crime Alley, I'm so proud of him.
Green Arrow: We caught him in Star City with Drug runners.
Brucie: I'm sure he has a good explanation, don’t you Jaylad?
Red Hood still reeling from Bruce showing up as Brucie and not Batman: I was undercover?
Brucie: See perfectly reasonable, now can I please have my baby boy back? Alfred will be so upset if he's not home for dinner.
Surprisingly, this works , the Justice League is to stunned by this revelation and later confirm this with Batman that yes, the notorious Red Hood is the son of Billionaire, philanthropist airhead Brucie Wayne. Jason, meanwhile, has suffered a huge blow to his cred in the Hero community because of the association with Brucie instead of the Batfam. The bat siblings do not let this go anytime soon.
“You didn’t even taste her”
First drawing of 2025 :3
probably a huge reach but I do wonder if percy’s refusal to explain his plans to anyone was influenced by him telling bianca his plan and then her getting herself killed trying to execute it