I got to work IMMEDIATELY
I know it might be different because astarion is a vampire spawn. But please, just…just let me have this.
Summary: Loki returns from a recon mission to discover that you hadn't slept since he left. Four days ago. based on the prompt "I haven't slept in four days"
Pairing: Loki x Reader (friends to lovers)
Word Count: 3.1k
Warnings: accidental sleep deprivation, light cussing, mild angst (?), Tony's a bit of a dick [let me know if i missed anything!]
"Hey, Reindeer Games, quit blocking the door, will you? I get it, you want out of here already because you can't stand being around us. Trust me, the feeling's mutual. But standing at the door while the Quinjet's still landing won't change a damn thing."
"It will guarantee that I am the first one out these doors, Stark," Loki grumbled in response, not moving an inch from his position by the door. Stark wasn't entirely wrong; he truly didn't wish to be around the billionaire, or his oaf of a brother. But he wasn't entirely right, either; if he allowed himself a moment of honesty, he wanted out of the flying vessel so that he could see you again.
You'd started working for Stark shortly after the god had been sent back to Earth due to a deal made by Thor on his behalf with their father, the Allfather, that instead of wasting away in a cell in Asgard for a thousand years, Loki would be utilized as an asset by the Avengers along with his brother as recompense for his attack on New York. When you'd started working at the tower, you recognized him immediately because of how often the news bombarded you with his face in those few days as well as the weeks – the months, really – that followed.
Not that you were complaining, of course, it was a devastatingly handsome face.
He fully expected you to recoil the moment he saw the recognition in your eyes, but just as much as you could recognize his face immediately, you saw as well that he was not the same man--god, actually--that he was all those years ago when he led the Chitauri to wreak havoc in your home. So with all the confidence you could muster, you smiled at him just like you did the rest and said it was nice to meet him. And that started the two of you on your path to where you were now, friends. Close friends, to be certain, but despite the arguments that would be made by some that you were more.
You weren't more. He would surely know if you were.
"Leave my brother be, Stark. He does not simply wish to vacate this vessel because he's itching to be away from us. He also wishes to be reunited with our dear Lady Y/N." What was that mortal expression again? Even broken clocks were right twice a day? Yes. That was Loki's current sentiment towards his brother. Oftentimes he would read situations wrong, but this time he was dead on.
"So what's the deal with you and her anyway, Rock of Ages? You hitting that?"
Loki straightened his stance, as if ready to battle yet again, and faced his brother and Stark. "How dare you insinuate that I would ever harm so much as a hair on her head--"
"Brother, no, you misunderstand our genius friend." He scoffed at the words. "Friend" was not a word he would use to describe Stark. "He simply means to inquire if you're laying with Lady Y/N--"
"Don't be ridiculous, brother," he hissed. "I've simply grown accustomed to her company. And she's too intelligent to get involved with someone as nefarious as I." And too pure, he thought to himself. To make the misstep of courting her would only proceed to corrupt her untainted soul.
"Oh I get it," Stark's words broke through his reverie. "He's in love." He didn't bother to even react to that observation. "Oh. Look at that. No snarky comeback? No 'you are all of you beneath me'? Are you actually--Oh my god Thor look at him he's seething!"
"Stark, I implore you to desist." Thor's tone was now cautious. "Perhaps just leave him be for now." Unbeknownst to the god of mischief, his brother had observed how he behaved around you. How he treated you as if you were something precious, and on the occasions that he held you, it was as if you were a delicate petal that might wilt at his touch. Thor had his suspicions, but watching how his brother reacted to Stark's words cemented them into conclusions. His brother was in love with you, and he'd chosen the path that would risk nothing but guarantee that you stayed in his life.
When the Quinjet landed and its doors opened, Loki let out a groaned "Finally" before striding through the Tower, down a path that was most certainly not to his chambers. Anyone who crossed his path knew to stay out of his way, what with the purposeful strides and the almost gleeful look on his face, there was no doubt he was on his way to you.
It was only when he was just a few more steps away that he realized the sun had only began to break through the night clouds, not having fully risen. You weren't due to arrive at the Tower for another three hours.
So then why was he hearing movement coming from your office? At this hour?
He closed the distance to your office and opened the door, half expecting staff to be doing their rounds. Instead he found you, furiously typing away at your computer as you always did, but looking more frazzled than usual.
"Y/N? Darling?"
You jumped at the sound of his voice, not even registering a few moments ago that the door had opened. You turned your head and looked at the devastatingly handsome features of the god you were fortunate enough to call your friend. Even though every time you referred to him as such, a dull ache would make itself known in your heart. You wanted more. Of course you wanted more. You'd have to be a fool to look at him, to know him the way you did, and not want more.
But you knew better. You knew your place. You were meek and unremarkable compared to the likes of a master assassin like Natasha, or a powerful witch like Wanda. You wouldn't even be able to defend yourself in a bar fight. Being his friend was all you'd ever get. And you had to be content with that.
I am content with that, you told yourself. Fooling absolutely no one.
"You're back already?" you blurted out, realizing you'd spent a few moments too long spaced out and staring, and hoping he didn't notice.
"Already? Darling, I was gone for four days, I--hang on." He walked towards you, taking your hand and gently tugging you up to stand. And then he took a good hard look at you, as if trying to remember something. "Something feels amiss with you."
"Y/N? You're way too early, even for you," Natasha's voice floated in to your office. She threw a quick glance Loki's way. "Welcome back, Laufeyson." Then she turned her attention back to you. "You're in the same clothes from Monday," she remarked, the concern beginning to lace through her voice as she observed the candy packets and coffee cups littered throughout your desk.
"Yeah. Because it's Monday," you answered, wondering why these two were acting so strange.
"Sweetie, it's Friday. The guys left for a 4-day reconnaissance mission on Monday morning. They returned today. Have you…have you been in here the entire week?"
Realization dawned on you as the words escaped your mouth. "I haven't slept for four days?" And then your knees buckled.
If it hadn't been for the reflexes of the god who wrapped his arm around you and held you upright, you would've for sure been on your ass on the floor right about now. "Sweetheart," he whispered into your ear, making you question if your heart picking up its pace was from the copious and questionable amounts of caffeine coursing through your bloodstream, or from his proximity to you. "Have you even eaten?"
"Do those count?" You motioned to the empty snack packets on your desk, causing him to groan as he rested his head against your temple.
"My darling human," he murmured, the rest of his words spoken too softly to be heard over the thundering of your heart.
"Alright, Y/N? Sweetie? I'm gonna fix you something to eat. Something proper. And then you're gonna get some sleep. I'll tell Stark you're not reporting for work today. Now go take a shower. Can you walk on your own? Loki, let her stand." He let you go, his arms poised to catch you in case you were to stumble over again; you didn't. And you managed to make your way over to Natasha without tripping over your own feet, which gave her a bit of reassurance. "Okay. Grab a change of clothes from my closet, get yourself cleaned up. Then make your way back down here and eat something before you go to sleep, okay?"
You nodded as you made your way upstairs. You briefly heard her tell Loki not to follow you, and then holler at Wanda to make sure you made it to her room alright, and the Sokovian met you at the top of the stairs. "Y/N, you look awful. What happened?"
"I forgot to sleep." The look she gave you prompted you to say more. "For four days."
She looked towards the common area, chuckling to herself. "No wonder your god looks completely beside himself."
"He's not my god, Wanda, he's--we're--we're friends." In your compromised state, you could barely contain the hurt that laced your voice as you said the words. "Just friends."
"But you love him," she prodded. "And I've seen the way he looks at you. That's not a look of friendship, dear one."
"You're wrong, Wan." You may be sleep deprived, but you were adamant in your convictions. "He simply tolerates me a bit more than the rest of you, that's all. That's it and that's all."
"If you say so, my friend," she murmured as you made it to Natasha's room. You walked straight towards the shower. "Any preference?" she called from Nat's closet.
"I just want my bits covered, Wan. I'll leave the rest to you."
Fifteen minutes later you emerged from Nat's bathroom in a fluffy white towel, eyeing the emerald green silk camisole and shorts set that Wanda laid out for you. "Really?" You proceeded to eye her.
She shrugged in response. "Suits you. Makes you look regal."
"I'm assuming you're not familiar with the concept of wearing certain colors in Asgardian culture, then?" At least your brain seemed like it was a bit sharper, thanks to the shower.
"No, I am." The smirk on her face told you she'd been hanging around with Thor and Nat too much. "I'm not lying about the color making you look regal, Y/N. It really does. Regal and his."
"I'm not his," you snapped, making yourself flinch. "I mean I am, but I'm not. I'm his but he doesn't know it. He doesn't care. We're friends. That's it--"
"--and that's all," she finished. "I get it, I get it. Now I'm pretty sure that despite our friendship, sharing panties is where we draw the line, so you'll have to go without." You shrugged, figuring as much, as Wanda turned around to let you change into the borrowed clothes.
She led you back to the stairs where Loki was waiting for you at the end. He threw a look towards Wanda when he caught sight of your outfit, and you were too caught up in making sure you didn't trip that you didn't catch her mouthing a "You're welcome" his way. When you reached the bottom of the steps, he wrapped his arm around you and led you to the kitchen island where Nat had a sandwich ready for you.
"You know I'm perfectly capable of walking, right? I managed just fine a while ago." You did your best to keep your tone light, almost joking. So that he hopefully couldn't see through you and see that you were fighting every urge to swoon and fawn over your current predicament. Just friends, just friends, you chanted over and over in your head.
"I prefer having my reassurances," he answered you simply as he lifted you onto a bar stool by the island. "You're far too precious to be compromised," he whispered as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
"Eat," Nat ordered, placing a glass of water as you took a bite. You winced at the sound your stomach made as your body began to recognize that it was being fed real food and not something ultra-processed and sealed into a colorful wrapper. When you finished your sandwich, she took your hand and gave you a pill. "Melatonin. Drink. Then go to my room and rest. I'll be away the whole day anyway--"
"Nonsense, she's staying with me," Loki cut her off. "You've mentioned multiple times that you keep blades hidden throughout your chambers, some of which are very well within reach of anyone sleeping in your bed, Romanoff. She's safer with me." Your blood ran cold. Sleeping in the same bed as him? In your current state of dress? Yeah, that sounded like the worst idea.
You opened your mouth to protest but the look on his face told you that wasn't any better of an idea. He seemed hellbent on personally making sure that you were nursed back to your normal state of mortality. He motioned to the pill in your hand. "Drink it, darling." You did as you were told. "Good girl." You fought every instinct you had in order not to show the effect those words had on you. His next words, though? You were completely gone. "Let's get you to bed."
"You know, Jack Frost, if you wanted to get dear Y/N into bed with you, you could've just asked," you heard Tony quip as he walked into the kitchen. Then he took a look at you, your sullen face and your sunken eye bags. "What happened--"
"She didn't sleep for four days," Natasha answered.
"I was trying to find a weak point in the security system of a group called the Ten Rings, you might be familiar with them, Tony, they were--" Your words got cut off as you felt the air leave your lungs, your feet leaving the floor as the dark-haired god scooped you up into his arms and carried you up the stairs and away from the conversation. "Hey!"
"No more talk of work, little mortal. It will still be there when you wake. For now you have to rest."
"Take next week off, Y/N! I don't want to see you in that office of yours for the next seven days!" Tony hollered from his place in the kitchen.
When you and the god were out of sight and earshot, Nat addressed Tony. "Isn't that a bit too much? I mean today and Monday? Yeah, I understand. But the whole week? What game are you playing, Tony?"
"Laufeyson's," he answered the assassin. "I'm giving him game. Those two are idiots in love if I've ever seen it. And call it a gut feeling, but I think one of them's finally gonna confess. The week is more a gift to him than her."
"Aww you're warming up to him."
"You tell anyone and the next mission I send you on is with Barnes. Just Barnes."
You finally felt the effects of the medicine kicking in as you laid in the center of Loki's bed, listening to him reading you poetry with his silken voice. You didn't want to but you felt your eyelids falling, despite wanting to keep awake a little longer just so he'd keep reading to you.
"Sleep, my darling," he chuckled as you let out a yawn.
What possessed you to shuffle closer to him and rest your head on his chest – his bare chest, mind you – you would never know, but you'd blame it on the Melatonin. "Thank you for making sure I don't stab myself in Natasha's bed," you mumbled against his skin, unable to register that his heartbeat had gone erratic against your ear.
He pressed a kiss to your hair. "Of course, my precious mortal. I'll always watch out for your safety, you can hold me to this promise." He ran his fingers lightly up and down your side, trying to help you get to sleep faster, so that he could allow himself to lose his feigned composure at the feel of your soft body against his.
You wrapped your arm tighter around him and burrowed your face into the crook of his neck as you mumbled, "I knew there was a reason I fell in love with you."
His hand stopped. His breath stopped. He could have sworn his heart stopped as the words left your slumbering mouth. "What did you say?" he all but choked out.
He felt you shrug against him as you said, "Why the fuck not. It's just a dream anyway." His breath hitched as he awaited your words. "I fell for you. Head first. Absolutely stupid in love." If it hadn't been for the drowsy tone of your voice he could've sworn you were awake. Or perhaps he wished you were, so that he could look into your eyes as you said these words. "I know I shouldn't be. Ruin the friendship and all that. But you didn't exactly make it impossible. You're perfect. Annoyingly perfect. And I was defenseless."
"Oh Y/N," he breathed out. "My dear heart. My darling, beautiful little human. Are you telling me you're mine?"
"I'm yours," you murmured. "I've always been yours." You nuzzled more into the crook of his neck, whispering against his skin, "I love you, Loki Laufeyson." The tears escaped him at those words, rolling down his cheeks. "Such a damn shame you don't feel the same way." It was as if the world had stopped turning as he felt you press your lips to his neck, letting out a contented sigh, before you fully succumbed to sleep. He had to tell himself to remember to breathe as he felt your breaths even out, letting him know that you had finally surrendered your body to rest.
The god, on the other hand, didn't sleep a wink. He couldn't. Not when there was so much he wanted to say. Not when there was so much to plan.
A/N: Yes there will be a part 2, I'm not leaving it here. I just had to cut myself off because I'm incapable of writing short stories ahhh
Part 2 is up and available HERE!
Taglist: @lokisgoodgirl @lokischambermaid @imalovernotahater @redbluekjw @lucylaufeyson3 @thomase1
Remember Me
summary: you cant make sense of where you are or even how you ended up in this cell, hells, you're not even sure of who you are at this point; any memories of your past are a blur. its all the more confusing when a group of adventurers come rescue you, and a particularly worried pale elf takes it upon himself to help you remember who you are.
rating: E
word count: 7k
pairing: astarion x you (fem!reader, reader is tav)
cw: 18+. angst, act 3 spoilers related to astarion's side quest, mentions of kidnaping and torture, memory loss, blood feeding, vampire bites, smut, oral (f!receiving), p in v, The Leg Thing followed by mating press, sweet love making, love confession. full list on ao3
a/n: loosely based on this audio (18+) from OGY.
read on ao3
my masterlist
or keep reading down below~
Pain.
It’s the first thing that hit you when your consciousness came back to you.
How much everything fucking hurt.
Your entire body felt as if it had gone through the nine Hells, all at once; you could barely find the strength in yourself to get to your feet, let alone push yourself off the ground.
Then it was the disarray when you couldn’t place what had happened for you to feel so awful.
It was as if you had woken up from a long sleep; distant voices in your head, blurry faces merging together when you closed your eyes, and an awful feeling of emptiness, as if you had forgotten something extremely important but you couldn’t put your finger on it, no matter how much you thought about it.
Nothing but endless darkness.
As much as you tried to remember your life, anything before this moment, you were met with a dark fog clouding your vision. Your family, your friends — if you even had any — had all vanished from your memory. You think you remember yourself, for the most part, but even that was a stretch; you couldn’t even remember your own bloody name.
You look around you, realising for the first time that you were in a prison cell. The course of events after waking up in this dark cell hadn’t helped; the sudden cold inhabiting you, followed by this man — this monster — barging in without as much as a warning before pushing you face first against the ground and ripping open your shirt, to then torture you as he carved your back with his knife, only to leave as suddenly as he had appeared. Barely a few words exchanged, aside from some mumbling about teaching “him” a lesson, whoever that was, and you were alone once again.
Alone, with nothing but this seething pain in your back from the butchery you had gone through, the hunger digging into your belly, and your blood leaking from your shivering form, pooling around you on the cold, hard floor.
You barely had the time to gather your thoughts when the same man came back barely minutes later to carry you out of your cell and into a larger room — keeping you restrained with some magic that visibly came from his staff — where more people waited.
By the looks of it, you had been right on one thing: this was indeed a dungeon, and you were located in the deepest part of them; this room contained only a round, rock platform, located above an endless, foggy pit.
In the state you were in, you couldn’t catch everything he said as he went on a monologue. Something about powers, freedom; whatever it was, they needed you to achieve it, that was the only thing that was clear from his speech. You couldn’t understand how any of them would follow a maniac like him, but in their eyes you noticed how they listened to his words with as much fear as awe.
Your form was shivering from the cold; you wanted to cover up your top which had been previously ripped off from your body, but it was all in vain: the restraints of his magic kept you in place, and right after his speech, you were sent flying over a designated spot floating above the ground, just like all the six other people that had surrounded you previously.
Your arms remained bound to your sides by whatever spell this monster had cast on you, leaving your chest exposed to the damp, cool air of this dungeon, and your fresh wound stinging evermore at your back.
You remember the panic tightening in your chest when you realised you couldn't escape. You remember the brief relief, hope even, at the sight of a group of adventurers approaching — one of the figures shouting at the man in the middle of the room — followed by explosions and screams. Then the fear settled in when you saw them execute one of the other unfortunate souls magically held floating around this room, one new truth forming in your mind.
They weren’t here to save you.
You would be next. They would kill you. You would die here.
The pressure in your chest grew tighter as you closed your eyes and mourned your life, one you didn’t even remember experiencing, one that — you hope — had been full of adventures, of acquaintances… of love.
This last one must’ve been true. You remember being loved — more so how it felt, even if the feeling seemed so far and long ago. You remember the butterflies in your belly, the fluster in your heart, the heat between your legs; you remember just enough to know that if you died today, at least, you would’ve died as someone who had been loved.
You didn’t expect your feet to touch the cold hard ground once more. You remember falling to your knees, your body exhausted by the abuse it had gone through in just the last few hours. You remember your dry throat when you noticed the butchered corpse in the middle of the room, barely recognizable anymore.
“Gods… what has he done to you?”
But you couldn’t seem to place the face of your saviour. The bloodied, silver curled elf who had rushed to kneel next to you after defeating your captor, who approached you and held your face so carefully.
How those crimson eyes of his had widened in horror when you flinched at his touch and backed away.
Him and his group had killed one of you who stood in this circle, who’s to say he wasn’t here to finish the job? Lure you in with a sweet touch only to snap your head off; you knew better than to let yourself fall for the first man to approach you.
“Darling, it’s over now.” He had said with his voice low, getting back on his feet to approach you as if you were an injured beast, “Just take my hand, we’re getting out of here.”
You didn’t know whether to feel insulted or reassured by his assertiveness, but you remained frozen in place, your eyes switching from the hand extended out to you and his severe look that you reciprocated with a frown to hide your terror.
“Look,” he sneered, “you can either take my hand, come with me out of this hellhole, or rot away in this godsforsaken—”
From behind him, someone from his group called out a name which stopped him mid-sentence just as his tone was rising.
“Astarion.”
A name that felt oddly familiar, despite the void in your memories. It danced beautifully as it echoed across the room and around your mind; there was something about it that just sounded right.
Astarion. A name worthy of being written in the stars, you find yourself thinking, the sound of it bringing you a familiar sense of peace, of security.
Astarion. Maybe if you repeated it enough in your head, something clearer would come up. Maybe, just maybe, then you would remember.
He took a deep breath and continued, which brought you back from your reverie, “I’m quite certain you went through the Hells and back, but for now, I’ll have to ask you to trust me, just as you’ve done in the past. Can you do that for me?”
He extended out his hand once more, this time a request rather than a command, his voice carrying out his concerns, “Can you trust me?”
“Why would I trust someone I’ve just met?” You wanted to ask, but something about the way he asked struck a chord, as if you did know him. As if you knew he spoke true when he said you used to trust him, and you finally accepted the hand he held out to you.
A hand that pulled you to your feet, and guided you out of this dreadful place.
You were given a cloak to cover your shivering form, and you walked along with them back to their camp. Back to this intriguing, yet charming man’s tent, where they all agreed you should rest for the night.
The first thing that hit you when you stepped in was the smell.
You didn’t know what it was exactly, you couldn’t recognize it, but it was intoxicating; it only made your stomach churn more. As the adrenaline of the previous hour settled down, you fell to your knees, grabbing onto your waist as the pain that had been muted came back screaming through your guts.
“Shit—” He rushed down to check on you, with one hand down your back, holding onto you, “Darling, talk to me, what’s wrong?”
“What isn’t wrong?! I was tortured, starved off, almost sacrificed for all I know, and I can’t even remember who I fucking am!” Is what you wanted to say, but all you could manage out is a groan in the middle of your sobs.
When you lifted your head, your eyes fell onto the set of messily arranged bottles from where the strong smell came from, and a quick exchange of glances told him everything he needed to know.
“Of course, you’re hungry,” He sighed heavily, "Look, I’ll gladly offer you some from my own reserves — after I’ve taken a look at your wounds.”
You had almost forgotten about them.
You averted your eyes from his gaze, your mind now racing as you expected the worst. You had no way to see what had been done to your back, but the pain you had gone through was a good indicator of how bad it would look.
Met with your silence, he continued, “I need… to see what he’s done to you. Please.”
Your eyes went back and forth between him and the dark bottles briefly considering pouncing on them to get a taste as your mouth watered in anticipation, but you reluctantly turned your back to him as you sat with your legs pressed back into your stomach, barely helping mitigate the pain in your stomach.
As you let the cloak fall from your shoulders, you heard nothing but a shaky, deflated sigh behind you. Seconds of silence passed before you considered turning around, but a part of you was terrified of the look you would find on his face.
You finally found the strength to utter your first words.
“Is it… that bad?” Your voice was rough from neglect, as the last time you had used it had been to scream when you received this torture.
You heard him take a deep breath, shaking away the shock that had previously rendered him speechless, “You must’ve already known what he carved away in your back. Hells, I knew before even looking, but seeing it…” he pauses, his tone quieting, “seeing it is another story completely.”
“I… I don’t know,” you muster with a weak voice. It's true, you had no idea, he had carved your damn back, you had no way to see the extent of his torture.
He took a deep breath, shaking away the feelings that had sneaked their way into his voice, “It’s no matter, it’s over now; Cazador is dead. He won’t hurt—” he paused, as if processing the information himself, “Anyone, ever again.”
You turned around to face him this time, “Who’s Cazador?”
He huffed, “I’m glad it was that easy for you to forget about him, but when you’ve suffered under his hand for nearly two centuries, the memories tend to linger.”
You remained silent as you stared at him, just as shocked as you were confused by his words. When he noticed your stare, his face twisted in concern, “Oh shit, you’re serious.”
You nodded silently.
He continued, tentatively, “He was my master, he’s the one we killed back in the dungeons — the one who abducted you, who did this to you. Do you not remember any of this?”
You shook your head slightly, never leaving his gaze.
“Oh dear.” His voice dropped as his eyebrows raised and his eyes widened all at once, “Do you remember anything at all — the absolute, our adventure… Do you remember… me?”
His eyes went back and forth between yours, as if he was searching them for any sign of recognition, looking for you, whoever you were behind those confused, teary eyes. You gave him another shy shake of your head, followed by a single tear coming down your cheek, a tear you weren’t sure why it was shed; whether it was from the loss of yourself, or the mourning of something you didn’t even remember having.
“Gods…” He breathed out heavily as his sight left you, his mind visibly ruminating. “He can’t… He couldn’t have… He…”
His tone suddenly changed as he growled, “That monster.”
He closed his eyes and shook his head before looking back at you, “You were with us just yesterday. You were — are this group’s leader. If… If you have no memories of your mortal life then it means…” he looked away, frowning, “He rushed your transformation to replace me in the ritual.”
None of the words he had said made any sense to you, “Transformation?”
He turned back to you to be met with your visible confusion, and he explained further, “Normally, when you’re turned, you need to be drained of your blood and buried six feet underground, before you can crawl out of your tomb to be reborn. This process takes a day, usually, and when you awaken, you are still you, but immortal and bound to your master,” he spat out the last word like it left a bitter aftertaste on his tongue.
“Now you,” he continues, “you were turned within twelve hours, which would explain why your eyes are only half red, why your fangs haven’t come out yet, and…” his voice quieted down, “why you have no memories of your past. As if the rushed transformation had actually killed this part of you along with your humanity.”
You remained focused on the first thing he had said: your eyes had changed colour?
You hadn’t had the chance to look at yourself since your awakening and if not remembering your name wasn’t anxiety inducing enough, you realised you couldn’t even recall what you looked like.
All of a sudden, panic rushed its way into your heart; you needed to see yourself. You frantically looked around the tent to find anything that could send back your reflection and practically jumped on the pocket mirror when you spotted it nearby Astarion.
Only the mirror was broken. It must’ve been; it reflected nothing.
“If that wasn’t obvious by now, this should’ve clarified things a bit,” he said.
He lowered the mirror you still held in front of you, expecting your image to be reflected eventually, maybe at a different angle, maybe with more light. Maybe another one would, maybe you were just delirious from everything that had happened only today.
“You’re a vampire now. No matter the angle, you’ll never see your reflection come out of this mirror. Believe me, I’ve tried.”
Vampire.
The word didn’t make sense; nothing made sense.
Yet, when you parted your lips to let your tongue run against your teeth; you found your canines the same size they were, that they should’ve been, but they were much sharper than what would be considered normal and you almost pierced your tongue from the gesture.
“Maybe…” he carried on, lost in thought, “there’s even a chance that the tadpole has been messing around with more of the changes your body is going through.”
“Tadpole?” You interjected, your head shaking of its own in disbelief. “What?”
He huffed in astonishment, “So you really do remember nothing.”
You sighed, “I— I don’t… As much as I try, I’m met with a void of memories. The only thing remotely familiar since I woke up has been… you.” His eyes had gone soft and bright with hope, but also melancholy. “I don’t know who you were to me, and I don’t know why, but some part of me knew I could trust you.”
He chuckled, a sad smile finding its way over his lips, “Even with your memories gone, it seems I can’t leave your mind, can I?”
You gave him a smile of your own, “Would you mind… reminding me of my life? Of us?”
“Gods, where to start, darling. Would you believe me if I told you our story began with me holding a knife to your throat?”
You found yourself smiling unconsciously, “With everything that's happened to me in the last few hours, I find that easy to believe.”
“And strangely enough it's probably the least odd part of our story.” He tilted his head, giving you a genuine smile before carrying on.
“It’s all tedious, really, but… There’s one memory I want to tell you about: The night of the tiefling party. Ugh, it was dreadful for the most part; the wine tasted like vinegar, the music was too loud, and there were too many of those bloody tieflings at our camp, to be quite sincere— “
“Not a people’s person I take it?”
“My dear, after years of being forced on and by people, the last thing you want is to be surrounded by more of them.” The sight of you parting your lips and raising your eyebrows told him you had also forgotten about this and he quickly caught onto it, changing the direction of the discussion back to the topic at hand. “But, there was one good thing that came out from this night: when we met in the woods. I had high hopes of you joining me there — although no doubts, of course — I was the most suitable option among our group after all.”
“Most suitable? Someone else wanted to spend the night with… me?”
“Darling, the whole world and their mother wanted a special moment with you. But only one of us got that honour. A chance to steal away with everyone’s new favourite leader.”
The faint sounds of the party fading: music echoing through the forest, people laughing, the cool air of a summer’s night breezing through, and good company throughout the night.
“I have been waiting for you. Waiting since the moment I first saw you. Waiting… to have you.”
You blinked, “You… were waiting for me in the woods, I’m— I’m remembering.”
“I did put a lot of effort into my entrance, I would be upset if you didn't remember it quite honestly.” You laughed softly. “Do you remember what happened afterwards?”
Your eyes roamed as you pushed the memory further, before you lifted your head to meet his gaze, “You… kissed me.”
“After you had the audacity to say I didn't have you yet while you had come to me of your own volition, yes, and then?”
You chuckled, but your smile quickly faded as your memory unlocked the next part of this puzzle. He looked at you with a knowing glint in his eyes; he was simply waiting for you to say it yourself.
“We made love.”
He sighed dramatically, “Love is such a big word for what happened back then, but…” his tongue clicked, accentuating the end of the word, “That was certainly the start of it. The start of a series of feelings that came and complicated everything. It’s what pushed me, soon after, to confess to you that it was all part of a silly plan I had to keep you in my favour. I was terrified, honestly, especially considering it was all because I initially manipulated you to fall for me…”
He paused, searching your expression before carrying on, and continued when he found nothing but soft eyes looking back. “But then — despite everything — there you were, holding me tight.”
He let go of a deep breath.
“For so long I had nothing — no one. And all of a sudden, there’s you, who held onto me, who cared so much more than anyone ever did. And I found myself not wanting to let go. I couldn't.”
He frowned, turning his gaze away, “And Cazador used that against me. As soon as he had word of my whereabouts in Baldur’s Gate and the crowd I was hanging out with, he jumped at the first chance to torture me once more. He probably thought I was unaffected by any physical pain he could impose on me by now, so he did the next worst thing: take it out on the one person I cared about in this wretched world.” He shook his head, “If we hadn’t gotten there in time—”
“But you did.” You interrupt. “You saved me and yourself in the process. This ritual wouldn’t have given you the freedom you think it carried.”
His eyes lit up, “You talk as if you knew what it entailed.”
You nodded, “It’s coming back to me, bit by bit. I remember what you told me about him. I remember the purpose of the ritual, and your plan to replace him and take his power instead.”
He sighed, “Gale thought brilliant to kill one of my brothers to stop Cazador from carrying on with the ritual. Bloody wizard didn’t realise it meant I couldn’t continue it myself then.
“Maybe he did.” His gaze flickered back to you in confusion before you continued, “You don’t need satanic powers to carry on, Astarion. You’re free now.”
He huffed, “And all it cost was my life in the sun.”
“Well,” you tilted your head, “It did cost me mine too. Once the tadpoles are gone, we’ll both be banished to the shadows once again. But we’ll be together, and that’s something at least.”
He rolled his eyes before landing them on you, “At least the transformation didn’t take away from your heartbleeding optimism, dear.”
You chuckled, “Thank the Gods for that— ugh!”
You clutched at your stomach, your body tilting forward in pain, and Astarion instantly knew the cause of your suffering; it’s something he recognized all too well.
“Hells, you must be starving. Gods know Cazador wouldn’t waste a single drop on a lowly spawn — no offence, dear.”
“None taken,” you forced a humourless laugh. “I shouldn’t have expected much considering I was to be cattle for a satanic ritual.”
He turned around and you kept a close eye on him as he handled the bottles beside him, pulling out a silver cup out of his bag of holding to pour you a portion.
“Here,” he sat back down, parting his legs open, extending one arm to you, “Come on love, sit back against me, would you?”
You stared unsure for a few seconds but obliged him. You scooted back until your back was fully resting against his chest, leaving no space lost between the two of you.
When he brought the cup forward you reached for it but he pulled back, clicking his tongue, “Oh no, my sweet, I will be the one to feed you tonight. This is your first time, we wouldn't want your primal instincts to take over now, would we?”
You turned around to stare at him for some time with incertitude and he simply tilted his head, with a sly smile, “Humour me, darling. You’ll be glad you did, hm?”
You pressed your lips together almost pouting, but acquiesced as you nestled yourself between his legs, your tense body laying against his chest once again.
He brought the cup to your mouth at long last, while his other hand held onto your chin. You gasped at his touch — while not unwelcome, it was a surprise — and you parted your lips to welcome your drink.
His hands were rough against your skin, yet there was a softness to it that made you melt under his touch. Made you want to push further into his hand to know how it would feel around your throat. It was almost enough to make you forget about the drink against your lips. Almost.
While the mere closeness of it had been invigorating, drinking it was ecstatic. It felt like your first meal in weeks, and it might as well have been with the pit that had replaced your stomach.
You took big gulps of the delectable nectar, barely pausing for air as you rushed to empty the cup’s content, eager to have your fill with this delicious substance.
“Slowly now darling,” he pulled the cup away from your lips and you gasped at the loss of your feeding source, “This is your first time feeding; I wouldn’t rush things.”
You frowned, but complied; even if you were starving, he had over two hundred years of experience with this form — you barely had a few hours. Your mind wasn’t all there yet either, and it's true that you couldn’t trust those new primal instincts to be civil enough to drink responsibly.
You held onto the one truth you knew, one that was clear ever since the start: you trust him.
You eased back into him, letting him hold you and guide you throughout your meal. The cup rested at a slightly down angle against your lips to allow you good mouthfuls of blood without overfeeding you all at once.
“There, good girl,” he purred. “You are doing so well for me, love. Small sips now, let your body recuperate from the shock.”
There was something about his voice that soothed you, brought you a peace of mind, a calm after this storm that had been your last few hours.
A shiver down your spine, that travelled all the way down between your legs.
You finished the content of the cup at a slower pace than you had started, soothed by his soft approach and the new blood filling your stomach, and he took this chance to explain more about your condition while pouring you another serving.
“Considering this is your first feeding, you’ll need a bit more to carry on until your next meal. Mind you, it’s normal if you don’t feel full; this is a curse, after all. The real challenge is to learn to live with your hunger.” He cleared his throat as he brought the cup back up to your lips, full again, “Alright now, open up, love.”
You hungrily parted your bloodied lips to welcome another serving.
“There, there, just like that.” A soft whimper left your throat between sips, and he caressed your cheek with his thumb, “Shhh, you're okay, you're doing just fine.” He leaned next to your head to whisper, “You’re perfect, my sweet.”
For a moment, you could swear you felt your heart beat anew.
You drank with his help until you finished one full bottle from his reserve, and with the pain in your stomach settling down, you allowed your body to relax against him. That’s when you felt something poking against your back, something you wanted to taste as much as the blood that had blessed your tongue just moments ago.
And he must’ve known, too.
“So, as you must’ve realised, your hunger was a side effect of the transformation. But what you’re feeling now, which I can very much smell on you, is a result of your feeding.”
If any of the blood you had ingested had made it in your veins by now, they must’ve all rushed to your cheeks at this very moment.
“Blood,” he continued, “Brings us back alive temporarily; it warms us, allows our hearts a few shy beating of their own, but it also reawakens other mortal pleasures. The first time it can be… a tad overwhelming.”
“It’s…” You hadn’t realised how quiet your heart had been until it started beating away once more in your chest; your cheeks felt warm, your breathing had accelerated, and your core was aching. You breathed out your reply, “It really is.”
As you turned your head aside, resting against his shoulder, and your eyes lingered over his lips, another primal urge awoke in you to devour him, in every way possible. You needed to taste him, his mouth, his blood, his come—
Until you were blessed with another sudden memory, and you turned away from his lips, gazing anywhere that wasn’t on him to stop yourself from acting irrationally.
“Wait, no, I’m sorry—”
He grabbed your chin and turned you back to him in one fluid movement. “You have nothing to be sorry for, darling, and I would be more than happy to entertain these carnal thoughts I saw in those eyes of yours. Unless you’d rather spend the night with someone else?” he teased.
You held your breath as he brought you closer to him, his hand lingering over your cheek. If you just closed the distance now, you could—
“No, Astarion, I won't force—”
“Stop that right now.” He cut you off without skipping a beat, stunning you once more. “You are not forcing yourself onto me or forcing me. This, right now, right here, is my decision.”
His other hand came up to cup your face, drawing you closer to him, your lips but a whisper apart.
“I want this,” he murmured against your lips, his voice lustful and heavy with need. “I want… you.”
Your eyes locked and the second after, his lips were pressed against yours and you let yourself get lost into this kiss. How his hands held on to your face, how his tongue tasted the blood on your lips, how he whimpered into your mouth at the contact of your own tongue; this memory of love you had remembered earlier, it had been a memory of this.
His kiss, his touch, his voice, him.
Your kiss was engulfing, springing your heart back to life in a sudden rush as you met every of his kisses with the same passion, and soon enough, you were laying back against his bedroll, with him over you and stealing your breath away; one — you didn’t realise yet — you didn't need anymore.
His hands rested next to your head and you allowed yourself to reach up to hold his face, trace the lines of his age over his cheeks and down his neck, and trailing along the opening of his shirt before he broke apart from your lips.
“I’ve been thinking about this for many nights now.”
“What would I be like as a vampire?” You asked semi-jokingly.
“No, silly — Although, the question did flit into my mind once or twice, but no. I was thinking of how I would have you, the next time I would bed you. I’ve touched myself at the thought of having you again, the sounds you would make, how your cunt would feel wrapped around my cock instead of my hand—”
He took your hand from where it was resting and guided it down between his legs, and a short gasp escaped you when you felt how hard he was.
“ —but tonight, after spending a lifetime looking for it, I finally know what I want.” His half-lidded eyes seemed darker than they had been, and you lost yourself in them, "And Gods help me if I can't have you—”
“I’m yours,” you answered back in a heartbeat, your voice but a whisper, “I’ve always been, and I’ll always be, for as long as you’ll have me.”
Your words broke the remaining chains of control Astarion had over himself, as he pulled your pants off from you and removed his own shirt while your hands fumbled with his trousers. A moment later, you both laid against one another, as bare as you were on your first days on this plane of existence, your lips back on each other.
“Mmh, I wonder…” Astarion let his kisses trail down from your mouth to your jaw, then your neck.
“Hm?”
“Now that you’re a vampire,” he left small kisses alongside your neck and down your shoulder, “your blood will taste different.”
“You’ll still drink from me?”
“Well of course, dear,” he lingered in the crook of your neck, before licking his way up to your ear where he whispered, “And I can’t wait to know how you taste after you’ve tasted me.”
You shivered against his breath, fully expecting him to bite you following those words, and when he didn’t you were almost disappointed. He, on the other hand, seemed extremely satisfied with himself.
“Eager already? And here I thought I was the most depraved between the two of us.” You sighed heavily as he came back up to face you, “Maybe I will be tasting you tonight, after all. Is this something that you want?”
You smiled softly, your hand finding his cheek again, “Yes.”
When your lips met this time, it was soft, pure, communicating words you hadn’t exchanged yet despite your longing for one another. It only made you want him more.
“Speaking of tasting you,” he said against your lips, “I wonder if something else has changed.”
You barely had time to process what he had said when he made his way down your chest, briefly sucking on one of your nipples.
“Mh,” he released it with a pop, “this one still tastes the same.”
He moved to your other breast to give it the same attention, teasing it with his teeth and earning him a moan from you before releasing it, “This one as well.”
He left a path of kisses as he trailed down your navel, until he was resting between your legs with a hungry look in his eyes, “Now, for the main course—”
You weren’t prepared for his fangs to dig in the inside of your thighs, making you scream in surprise as your hands grabbed onto the sheet of his bedroll. The pain quickly turned into pleasure as he nibbled and kissed the softness of your thigh, before making his way to your wet slit, which begged for attention.
The smell of you invaded his senses and you could feel his breath over your core as he breathed you in, his arms now wrapped under your thighs as he laid on his stomach and between your legs, “Darling, you smell divine.”
A soft whimper escaped your lips as his tongue pressed against your entrance and he slowly licked all the way up to your clit, “And you taste— Gods, you taste even better than before.” He smiled up to you, his mouth covered by a cocktail of your blood and juices. “I didn’t think it could be possible.”
You were past words by now, but even if you had come up with something, you don’t think you would’ve been able to utter anything with the way his tongue worked between your legs, devouring you of your essence.
“I would forsake blood for the rest of my days if it meant I could nourish myself only of your essence, my love,” he said between licks of you. “The Gods truly made you to ruin me; I could never move on from your taste, even if I wanted to.”
His hands surrounding your thighs and his nails digging in your flesh kept you in place as he continued to worship you, and no matter how much you wiggled, his hold on you held on, as if you were the first meal he was having in days and he wouldn’t let you go until he was sated.
Astarion recognized the signs of your unbecoming as your breathing started shaking and your legs tensed around his head, pushing him to tease you further.
“Are you gonna come for me now?” He smiled between your legs, “Come on, love. Come for me. Come on my tongue.”
The vibration of his humming as he continued to savour you only added to the feeling of his tongue, lapping at your entrance and sucking over your sensitive bud, and his nails digging deeper into your thighs added a delicious hint of pain. After weeks without any sex, you were sensitive to the slightest touch, and now there he was: tasting you, devouring you, wanting you; it was all too much.
“Ah… Astarion!”
Your head fell back against the rough floor of his tent as your back arched and stars clouded your vision. You knew how ironic it was to think so, but you had never felt more alive than you did at this very moment, with your devoted lover worshipping you like the goddess who had finally answered his prayers from all those years ago.
Your legs collapsed as he let go of them to move back up to face you, and he took this chance to hook your leg with his, pushing it upwards to create the perfect angle for him to place himself against your entrance.
Your half-lidded eyes met his, delirious with lust, and you wanted to express the feeling that had been weighing on you for too long now, but when his lips collided with yours and you tasted yourself, all those words got lost on his tongue exploring your mouth.
“I’ve waited so long to finally have you,” he said breathlessly against your lips. “I kept pushing back, thinking it was never the right time.”
He licked his lips, wiping off the string of saliva that connected your mouths. “When you disappeared… I thought I had lost my only chance. I’m done waiting around.”
He slowly pushed himself into you with a low groan as he felt your slickness wrap around him, and you threw your arms around his neck as you moaned into his ear.
“Fuck, you’re so wet. So tight and warm, all for me. I would stay here inside of you for a decade if I could. You feel exquisite, my love.”
He retracted himself slowly, and plunged back in with the same agonising pace, taking in the feeling of your inside. “I’ll enjoy taking my time with you; discovering what makes you tick, tease every one of your sensitive spots. But tonight — I just want this: feeling you wrapped around me and to know that I’m the reason for your unbecoming.”
His pace accelerated, each thrust of his hips brushing against your clit as your bodies almost fused as one, pushing you closer to another edge already.
A particularly well placed thrust had you dig your nails into his back and he hissed into your ear, “Darling,” he panted, “Remind me to trim your nails when we’re done.”
You quickly realised what he meant when a poignant smell, stronger than the bergamot, brandy, and rosemary you smelled on him previously, invaded your nostrils and your mouth watered in response. What you didn’t realise was how you ended up breathing down his neck, just against the popping vein conveniently displayed for you to bite down on. Just one bite away from ecstasy.
“Still hungry, little love?”
You were snapped out from your daze by his voice purring into your ear, pulling away from his neck and blinking as you gained back control of your thoughts.
“I’m— It’s just— Your blood smells really, really good.”
He chuckled, “I tend to have that effect on people. Would you like a taste?”
You forced yourself to look into his eyes, “I… Are you sure?”
He smiled, “There’s nothing I’d like more, my love.”
His gaze reflected sincerity and you gulped as you found your way back in the crook of his neck, your lips brushing against his sensitive skin. You licked the vein you had sensed earlier but didn’t push further. That’s when you felt the vibration of his chuckle, “Go on, darling. I can take it, I promise.”
With his permission, you pushed your small fangs right over the vein in his neck, relishing in the sudden flood of his crimson in your mouth.
Whatever you drank a few minutes ago was nothing compared to his blood. He was the source in a desert you had been roaming for days, one you couldn’t believe wasn't an illusion, and you drank, and drank, losing yourself in his neck, in his taste, the very essence that fueled him.
You couldn’t tell how much you had drank or how much time had passed when he growled and pinned your arms next to your head. His hips thrusting once, deeper into you and hitting your cervix is what makes you unlatch from his neck with a moan.
“I believe that’s enough, love. Now, let me taste you.”
His lips collided with yours hungrily as he increased his pace between your legs, and he groaned at the taste of himself on your lips, running his tongue across your small fangs.
“Fuck, I need you, I need to make you mine. I need—”
Something snapped within him, a side of him you couldn’t recall ever seeing — one that he could finally let go as he pushed your legs up, pinning them down across your chest and pounded deeper into you.
He growled into your ear as he desperately rutted into you, nearing the edge of his climax at the same time as yours, “I want you, I want you for the rest of our lives, please be mine, be mine, be mine!”
“I’m yours, I'm yours, I— I love you!”
You screamed as you came, his own orgasm following closely after yours, the wave of emotions clashing with the sparks of pleasure coursing throughout your body, and for a moment, you think you died and came back to life within the same minute. It was stronger than anything you remember feeling — even with your memories still scattered, you think you’d remember something as powerful.
It’s only when you came back to your senses and was met with Astarion’s soft, dumbfounded expression, that you realised what you had just said. Panic slowly made its way into your heart and you struggled to find the right words to correct yourself.
“I’m sorry— I—”
He didn’t allow you to finish that sentence, kissing you once more to steal away those thoughts of regret that faded instantly as he pulled back to speak.
“I love you too, darling.”
Your future was paved with incertitude; your memory wasn’t all there yet, but you remembered what was important for now, and if forgetting your past was the price to create new memories with him, it was a price you were willing to pay.
Thank you for reading! Comments, reblogs, and likes are very much appreciated <3
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Bucky’s men can tell when he hasn’t talked to Malyshka that day ( in the context they are in a LDR) because he gets a little too …enthusiastic about destroying his enemies . Which isn’t a terrible thing considering his line of work, but not good in large doses
They can tell when she's mad at him 😭😂
Bucky gets miserable.
And there's nothing more dangerous than a miserable Pakhan.
He will start fights with his enemies just to have an outlet for his anger. Good for business. Not so great for his men who have to follow him into battle. He is impressive when he's in a mood. Theres an almost unsettling coldness to him, his already formidable reputation is built on these moments.
The Ryan takeover is still talked about—Bucky made an example out of their patriarch. All because they pissed him off on a day Malyshka was giving him the silent treatment. Any other day and Ryans may have left that meeting unscathed.
But as bad as he can get, she can calm him down with a simple kiss or a single glance in his direction with an unspoken warning to settle down. A little tug on that morality chain he placed around his neck for her and he's willing to do anything she says.
Bucky doesn't listen to anyone but her. And everyone knows that most powerful man on the east coast is wrapped around her manicured finger. Right next to her exquisite wedding ring.
actor!Bucky x fem!actress!Reader (no use of y/n, l/n, reader is not described in any great detail. I save that for the gowns 💃)
Warnings: Hollywood AU, language, internet nasties, flirty!Bucky, a little power imbalance, age-gap (Bucky is around 40, actress reader is closer to 30 or younger if you prefer 🤭)... more to be added later.
Bucky Barnes, the suave and talented leading man of the 'Winter Soldier' movie series, finds himself on the red carpet circuit during awards season with his latest film 'The Howling Commandos'. But the season takes an unexpected turn when he crosses paths with a mesmerizing newcomer - the actress who has become the talk of Tinseltown with her captivating performance in her most recent film. Sparks fly as they navigate silly season in Hollywood, with a spotlight on their every move will their chemistry ignite a real life romance?
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You hadn't known what to expect.
Sure, you'd done your fair share of press nights, television awards, red carpets and ceremonies, even the occasional movie premiere where (inexplicably) minor b, c and d-listers were invited.
You'd rubbed shoulders with the winners of Love Island, or the quarter finalists of The Voice, wide eyed and looking at each other like you were equally surprised to have been invited to these things.
Toronto was at a whole other level.
You’d miraculously been recognised in a public gym class at your hotel that morning, but other than that you’d been able to blend in like the millions of other tourists.
The studio had ‘loaned’ you the same stylist who’d handled the small flurry of media activity when you’d first been cast in the movie. Becka had been in Toronto ahead of you and had slotted into the third pillar of moral support alongside Dani and Lulu. She’d already taken Lulu with her to track down a selection of outfits to last the week, while you and Dani had been picked up to attend an opening weekend welcome lunch.
Faces of people you’d only ever seen on TV and the big screen breezed past you both while you stayed glued to the wall.
“You should say hello to someone,” Dani muttered into her mimosa.
“If I knew anyone…” you grimaced. You scanned the room again, hoping to see someone, anyone from your movie. “They sent me here to die,” you lamented with a frown.
“Ahh, none of that,” Dani chastised, taking your hand in her own soft palm. “Look at me, this is fine. You entertain strangers all day, every day. This is just an extension of that. Now breathe, smile, relax.”
You did as she asked.
“God, your skin looks incredible,” you marvel, “only you could get off a ten hour flight looking like that.”
“Come on, silly. Let’s at least have a walk around the room and look like we belong here.” She tucked her hand into the bend of your elbow, and nudged you along. “That’s Sam Wilson,” she whispered under her breath, “he’s Bucky Barnes’ agent, and that’s Joaquin Torres with him.”
You looked briefly as Wilson embraced Torres in a huge hug, both of them smiling widely. Distracted, you didn’t notice Dani slip ahead of you to avoid bumping into anyone, leaving you to walk straight into the next person to cross your path.
“Oh, shit,” you hissed, barely managing to keep hold of your glass. A warm hand with a tight grip held your elbow as the collision threatened to send you to the floor.
“You should watch where you’re walking,” a familiar voice chided.
The gruff tone of the Winter Soldier star, Bucky Barnes, was surprisingly gentle despite the harshness of his words. He’d taken a step back out of your personal space, his eyes locked on your face as he waited for you to respond.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, aghast. “I’m really so sorry.”
You stumbled back another step, his hand leaving your elbow.
His eyes narrowed, studying you.
He seemed more curious than annoyed at your embarrassment.
You, on the other hand, turned to retreat quickly with eyes like saucers.
Behind you, Dani had traced her steps back to find you and on seeing Bucky, gave an unintentional squeak of surprise. She clapped one hand over her mouth, the other seeking out yours.
Her gaze darted between you and Bucky.
He gave her a cursory glance before his eyes slid back to you, taking in the flush on your cheeks and the tension in your shoulders. He wondered absently why he found himself unable to look away.
Dani tugged lightly on your hand.
“Please, excuse me,” you breathed, your voice far braver and stronger than you’d expected it to be.
He nodded in acknowledgement but didn’t reply, watching as Dani led you away through the throng of producers, agents and PR reps. Bucky found himself still watching the space you’d previously occupied, his usually stern expression slightly softer than normal.
“Ladies fallin’ at your feet again, old man?” Sam grinned, giving Bucky’s shoulder a gentle shake.
Bucky rolled his eyes and took a long sip of his drink.
“Shut it, Wilson,” he muttered. Sam laughed, clearly enjoying Bucky’s discomfort.
“Ah, come on, Barnes,” he teased. ”Can’t handle a couple of adoring fans? It comes with the territory, you know that.”
You’d caught the tail end of the comment before the surrounding noise had filled the air.
“Oh god,” you mumbled under your breath, glancing over your shoulder as Dani dragged you through the crowd. “I just collided with Bucky Barnes.”
Dani nodded sympathetically, her hand tightening around yours.
“Don’t worry babe, this is a big place. You probably won’t see him again.”
“You think?” You asked, your voice small and tight with the embarrassment of almost falling over in front of the hottest, most famous actor in the room.
“Sure,” she smiled, taking a glass of champagne from a passing tray and replacing your empty one with the full one. “Put it out of your head.”
You nodded.
“Right. No point worrying about it.” Your eyes darted around the room, half hoping to catch another glimpse of Bucky, half hoping to avoid any further encounters.
It wasn’t long before you found your own group of castmates, producers and studio bodies, the memory of bumping into Bucky fading into the background. You were soon caught up in the whirlwind of conversations about upcoming projects, gossip and industry news.
The afternoon slipped away, with Dani diligently whipping out her phone to note down the various commitments and events you were being invited to. Your schedule was becoming increasingly hectic, and the thought of everything the rest of the week had in store caused a riot of nerves in your stomach.
“You should run a side hustle as my glamorous assistant,” you teased.
“Hmm, the best organised hair stylist in the industry. Curling wand in one hand, calendar in the other.” She laughed, linking her arm through yours.
“Thank you,” you kissed her cheek softly.
“The studio would get you an assistant, you know?”
“I think I prefer you, if you’re not too busy?”
“You’re the only one I’m here for, babe. Just make sure I have enough time to do your hair.”
You grinned at her, your heart swelling with affection.
“You’re the best. No one else is stealing you away.”
“You dragged me to Toronto,” she said as if it had been a hardship, “of course no one else is stealing me!”
Relief washed over you, having her and Lulu with you was grounding and comforting.
You made your way towards the exit, ready for a reprieve from the hectic, whirlwind of an afternoon.
The cinema was dark, filled with a growing hum of anticipation. You’d dressed down today, in jeans and a sweater, the polar opposite of awards season glam. It was a relief to be an unknown, no one paid you any mind as you slunk down into your seat and took the popcorn box from Lulu.
Your studio had given you tickets to the Howling Commandos premiere and panel and as the opening credits rolled, you noticed Bucky Barnes slip into the theatre and take a seat next to Yelena Belova on the front row, their heads bent as they whispered to each other.
You tore your eyes away and concentrated on the movie.
It quickly pulled you in, the dialogue, the visuals, the acting. You could feel the tension radiating from the screen.
Two hours later, tears streaked your face, the film's emotional punches had hit just right. It had been more powerful than you anticipated and you couldn’t wait to hear from the director as the lights flicked back on.
The energy in the theatre was electric as Belova, Barnes and Torres made their way to the stage, guided by a local journalist acting as the moderator.
You paid close attention.
You were used to a surface level of media scrutiny, the local paper outside the theatre after a show, but you had a feeling that nothing could prepare you for your own up and coming premiere.
The cast of the Howling Commandos were clearly comfortable in front of such a large audience, and played off the panel's questions with ease.
They were a joy to watch.
Insightful, witty… Belova heaped praise on her starring actors and they responded in kind.
They left you in awe.
You'd crept forwards, onto the edge of your seat.
“And what are you guys looking forward to seeing over the next few days?” The moderator asked curiously.
“The Stark documentary for me,” Joaquin Torres grinned.
“Cabaret looks so fun.” Yelena added.
“For me, it's Cabaret and also the new John Walker movie,” Bucky said with a smirk, the audience erupted into laughter at the mention of his box office rival and Winter Soldier co-star.
“Musical fans, huh? Think we might see you in a musical one day?”
Bucky scoffed.
“God no, no one wants to hear me sing,” he laughed. The audience vehemently disagreed, as did Yelena.
“She's gonna put you in one,” Torres laughed, slapping Bucky on the back.
“She can try!”
“I'm gonna write it next,” she teased.
From far up in the auditorium, you could see the tops of Bucky’s ears pink.
Next to you, Lulu's hand reached for yours, gripping tightly and leaving crescent moon shapes on your palm.
“He's coming to see your movie tomorrow,” she hissed.
“Of course he's not, he's just saying that to be polite. He probably can't even go and get a coffee without getting mobbed. How's he going to sit in a movie theatre?” You fobbed her off but her words lingered in your mind.
The panel concluded its questions, and the auditorium burst into applause.
The cast was shepherded out of the room, fans already gathering, eager to catch a glimpse of their favourite actors.
You slipped through the crowded space, trying to stay out of the way. Lulu was ahead of you, navigating her way out of the area, and Dani stayed right behind you.
It was highly unlikely you’d be recognised here, but you'd already begun to notice an uptick in the number of people doing a double take when they saw you, from the girl in your gym class that morning, to the barista at the coffee shop at lunchtime.
You couldn't help but notice that the thin veil of anonymity you had enjoyed was quickly slipping away. With your own movie premiere just around the corner, you knew it was only a matter of time before your face was plastered everywhere.
“Sit still please,” Lulu breathed, her face millimeters from yours and pinched in concentration as she applied false lashes to your own.
You did as she asked and tried not to look past her at the outfit Becka was steaming. The first of three, one for morning interviews, one for the premiere and one for the party your studio was hosting that night. Next to Lulu, Dani unfurled her case of equipment.
“Hair up or down?” She asked, not you though, she was asking Becka.
Becka took a moment to examine the outfits.
“Can we do up today and have it down later tonight?”
“That’s fine, I can style it loosely so it’s easy to take down this evening.”
“It’s so exciting!” Lulu giggled. She finished the lashes and stood up straight, stretching her back.
“Scary exciting,” you corrected her. “My butterflies have got butterflies.”
She switched places with Dani who squeezed your shoulder before brushing through your hair.
“Just be yourself and have fun,” she chimed in.
Easier said than done.
You embraced the interviews, your confidence growing with each publication. It was a relief to know you’d done all you could to support your movie and to give it the hype - and the premiere - you felt it deserved.
The girls had gone ahead of you to the theatre, leaving you to walk the red carpet alone.
Your co-stars took you under their wing.
Despite it being your face (and ass) on the billboards, there were relatively few flashes from the photographers.
“They’ll regret sleeping on this moment, love,” your charming movie love interest, Steve Rogers told you warmly from a few steps further along the carpet.
“Doesn’t bother me in the slightest,” you smiled, “I think I prefer them not caring who I am.”
“Spoken like a true star in the making,” he moved to your side and the photographers went into a frenzy, “they’ll be fighting for your attention soon enough.”
Steve offered you his arm and you took it gratefully, leaving the red carpet behind and heading into the theatre.
It was a bigger auditorium than the one the previous night for the Howling Commandos movie, but yours was there on a much bigger budget and with a well known director attached.
You squeezed Steve's arm, slightly hesitant to follow him, but he pulled you along and into the room.
A cheer went up through the room at the sight of you both and you scanned the crowd for a glimpse of the girls as the lights began to fade. Just as you gave up hope of spotting them, you saw Dani’s hand fly into the air and wave. You blew her a quick kiss and sat down.
You could hear the murmurs of anticipation in the darkness, rustles of people shifting in their seats and getting comfortable.
This was the first time you would see the finished product - the final edit of the film you’d poured your soul into, upended your entire life for.
You were nervous at seeing yourself on screen, but there was also a thread of excitement, making your heart race.
This was the kind of life changing event that you, and others in your circumstances, had always talked about.
And yes, it could all be over by this time tomorrow.
The movie could flop, and you’d go back to being one of the nuns on the Sister Act tour, or one of the Mean Girls.
Your company would welcome you back with plenty of gin and hugs, and life would go on.
But for this night, this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, you wanted to soak it all in.
As the film unravelled before you, you hardly recognised yourself on screen.
The movie transported you, your memories of filming and rehearsals merging with the outcome you were now finally watching.
An overwhelming sense of pride filled you.
When the screen went black and the credits rolled, the audience erupted into a deafening applause.
It drowned out everything around you and you could barely hear the moderator call you to the stage for the panel.
As you lined up on the stage, the applause slowly died down.
The host smiled warmly.
“Welcome, and congratulations! It seems like these guys are pretty happy with the movie!”
Cheers and shouts filled the room again.
“Thank you so much!” Steve called out to the audience.
“We'll come to our leading lady first of all, huge experience for you, how's it feel?” She asked you excitedly.
You took a deep breath, trying to find the words to describe the mix of emotions coursing through you. It was hard to articulate something that was so difficult to explain, it all felt so alien to you.
“Gosh, it's crazy!” You exclaimed happily. “I'm blown away by all the support - I can't thank you enough.”
The audience cheered in response to your heartfelt gratitude, the energy in the room sky high.
“Now, for those who don't know, you're an accomplished stage performer, how different was this to your usual?” The moderator asked.
You took a moment to consider the question.
“It's definitely a different experience. Theater is live, it's raw and in the moment - no redos or do overs,” you explained, pausing for a breath.
“You say that, but is it true you sang each take live?” she queried.
“Yeah, I didn't realise until a few takes in that I didn't have to belt it out every time,” you admitted sheepishly.
There was a murmurer of laughter through the audience. You laughed with them, your cheeks turning pink at the revelation.
“Oh, your poor voice! I can only guess how your throat must have felt after a few takes on those songs.”
The questions progressed quickly through updating the original musical for a modern audience and the casting process before the host wrapped up with some more lighthearted queries.
“Were there any other inspirations both you and the production team drew on aside from the movie and the stage show?” She asked.
“Absolutely, for me in particular I watched a lot of Chicago, Sweet Charity, Burlesque… movies with incredible choreography and those instantly recognisable songs.”
“Well it certainly shows, the movie blends seamlessly into the modern era,” the host encouraged.
“It does, I think it helps that it was already such a forward-thinking show to begin with. The themes really are timeless.” Steve added.
“And finally, have you had a chance to see any of the movies being shopped around yet?”
“I'm seeing the Stark documentary tomorrow,” Steve offered.
“And I saw Howling Commandos yesterday,” you smiled.
“How was it?”
“A masterpiece. I cried through the whole thing. The cast were incredible -”
“Bucky Barnes, right?” She interrupted and the audience in your theatre cheered loudly. You nodded in agreement.
“He was… beautiful to watch. And so lucky to work with Yelena Belova, she's a visionary.”
The host thanked you and the rest of the cast, and the event security appeared from the wings, ready to prevent the audience from rushing down to the stage and mobbing the cast.
From your vantage point, you could see Dani sitting about halfway back in the auditorium, waving enthusiastically.
You caught her eye and waved back, the brightness of the auditorium lights now illuminating her features clearly.
The man sitting directly in front of her seemed a little bewildered by your exchange, his expression caught somewhere between confusion and curiosity.
He appeared familiar, but the baseball cap he was wearing hid most of his face from your view.
You found yourself squinting, trying to get a better look at him.
The man's shoulders looked broad and toned, his frame solid. As you leaned slightly to the side to get a better angle, the man jerked his head up, noticing your curious gaze.
Bucky Barnes remained unphased and held your gaze for a moment without blinking, challenging you to make a scene by drawing attention to him.
After what felt like an eternity, he winked, the corner of his mouth lifted into a sly smirk.
You felt your cheeks heat up under the bright lights, and embarrassed, tore your eyes away from him, focusing your attention back on the studio PR rep who was outlining the plan for the short meet-and-greet sessions and the after-party event following the screening.
Your heart thundered in your chest, your mouth suddenly dry but your hands clammy.
It felt inevitable that you’d run into Bucky again - though hopefully figuratively rather than literally - the Hollywood press was in a frenzy, hyping up the impact that both movies would have on the upcoming awards season.
Anticipation coiled and twisted in your stomach at the thought of seeing him again, and the very real possibility of talking to him. You’d be lying if you said the notion didn’t exhilarate you.
Studies is in "I'm gonna kill everyone / why are you breathing so loud" phase of the period and Stud isn't brave enough to face his girl, but still sends Alpine in this dangerous mission:
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMr3SGjQq/
Oh, nonnie, Stud KNOWS it's a bad period when Smartie gets to that point. It's why you actually choose to remove yourself from the living room because you don't want to snap at him. If you snap at him, you might start crying because he has to breathe and it isn't his fault. Then you'll get upset because you're crying and wondering why your body is punishing you again, as if you forget that this happens every month. And then you get angry that it keeps happening every single month and-
Yeah, it's best to just go to your room.
Bucky can't let you suffer like that. He wants to help, but how does he do so without setting you off? Alpine, of course. Beautiful, smart, agile Alpine who can easily carry the little baggie that he put together.
"This is dangerous territory, Al," Bucky says, giving her a quick pet once she has the bag. "But you're a brave soldier and she needs this."
Alpine gets it. She wastes no time heading to your room and sneaking in after Bucky cracks the door open just enough for her to sneak in. She spots you curled up on the bed, almost looking like a cat yourself. You jolt when she jumps on the bed.
"Alpine, how the hell did..." You trail off as a little baggie is dropped in front of you, raising an eyebrow at it. "What's this?"
Alpine paws at the bag, encouraging you to open it. Inside is some aspirin to help you with any pain, some chocolate because you love it even when you aren't on your period, an eye mask for relaxing later, and a little note. A tear falls on the piece of paper as you read it.
"Sorry for breathing so loud. You just make me lose my breath. I love you."
You have to laugh. It's so adorable and so cheesy and so Stud. God, you really lucked out with him.
"Thanks," you whisper as Alpine rubs her head against you. "And thank you, mouth breather!" From the other side of the door you hear, "Mouth breather?!"
You giggle again as you wipe your eye. It feels good to laugh. "I love you, Stud!"
"Love you, too, Smartie. I'll order a pizza."
And when you two have dinner, you won't mind how loud he breathes because he's perfect.
Love and thanks! ❤️
You learned quickly that Bucky Barnes had the tastebuds of a man who’d survived decades of rationed food and army chow—because he could eat anything. And not just anything… but pain. Pure, fiery, tear-inducing, sweat-on-your-brow spice.
You, on the other hand, would combust at a medium salsa.
The first time you’d gone out to eat together, he’d asked if you wanted to try a bite of his dish. You’d said yes, stupidly trusting. And when you took a mouthful of his flaming Thai curry, it was like your soul left your body for a moment.
Tears streaming, hiccuping, you’d waved wildly at him while gulping water, and all he’d done was laugh. That rare, deep laugh that lit up his entire face and made your heart flutter despite the actual hell in your mouth.
From then on, it became a silent agreement. You’d order something gentle—creamy, sweet, or mild. He’d get something that could probably strip paint. And no matter what, halfway through the meal, you’d each push your plates halfway across the table.
“Wanna trade a bite?” he’d ask casually, like this wasn’t a weekly ritual by now.
You’d glare at him every time. “One bite. One. And a small one.”
He’d just grin, breaking off a piece of your naan or scooping a bit of your pasta with practiced ease. You’d do the same, trying to find a pocket of his dish that didn’t look lava-adjacent. You never succeeded.
Tonight was no different. You were at a cozy little Indian place you’d both grown fond of. You had your creamy butter chicken with fluffy rice, and Bucky had some devil-red vindaloo that made the air around it spicy.
You exchanged bites like clockwork.
He hummed happily when he tasted yours. “God, how is this so good?”
“Because you can taste it,” you countered, taking the tiniest possible bite of his. “Oh my god—nope, still evil. Still so evil.” You grabbed your mango lassi like it was holy water.
He snorted into his water glass. “You’re so dramatic.”
“You’re a spice masochist.”
“Maybe I just like flavour, doll.”
“That isn’t flavour.. it's... it's- I dunno but it hurts”
Still, you tried it. You always tried it. Because for some reason, part of you loved the way he smiled when you did. Like he was in on a private joke with you. Like he liked knowing you’d brave the fire for him, even if it made your nose run.
And maybe… you liked feeding him a bite of yours, too. Watching his eyes flutter shut just a little at the sweetness, the softness of it.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Summary: You sneak out with Bucky for a secret date and almost get caught.
Word Count: 723
Warnings: humor, fluff, secret dating, lying to friends (for romance reasons!)
A/N: this is kind of a sequel to "you said what?" — it’s the same vibe, same chaotic energy, but it can totally be read on its own! just think of it as part of the same soft universe 💕 hope you enjoy this <3
You never thought your most romantic date would start with crawling out of a window and jumping two stories down into Bucky’s arms—right behind the dumpsters.
“I can’t believe this is how we have to go out,” you whisper, pulling your hoodie tighter.
Bucky grins at you, eyes sparkling. “Come on. You love the danger. Sneaking out like spies.”
You roll your eyes— but he’s right. You do kind of love it. Especially when he leans in and kisses you, right there in the alley, his hand cupping your jaw like you’re the best thing he’s ever held.
The two of you walk a few blocks, laughing quietly, until you reach the rooftop of an old bakery. It’s not fancy, but it’s cozy. Your spot. The stars are out tonight, the sky clear and dark, and it feels like something out of a dream.
Bucky opens a bag he brought with him. “Ta-da.”
You peek inside. Burgers. Fries. Milkshakes. From that place you both secretly love, Cheesy Billy’s Burgers, but refuse to tell the team about, because Tony called it culinary war crime once.
You sit side by side, your legs swinging over the edge of the roof. You eat, you talk, and you laugh so hard you almost choke on your soda. Bucky watches you with that soft look of his, like you’re the most important thing in the universe. Like the stars are nice, sure—but not better than you.
“Y’know,” he murmurs, “if we didn’t have to sneak around like teenagers—”
“We’d still come here,” you say, nudging his foot with yours. “This is our spot.”
He smiles and leans closer. “Yeah. Our spot.”
And he kisses you. Soft, slow, perfect. The kind that makes your heart ache in the best way.
Then—
You hear voices below. Familiar ones.
“Wait—this is where they get the good fries?” Sam says. “Why have we never been here?”
You both freeze.
You slowly peek over the edge of the roof. Sam and Peter are standing below, staring at the bakery’s glowing sign.
“Oh my god,” you whisper. “We’re gonna get caught. On our date night. While eating greasy fries.”
Bucky’s already stuffing fries in his mouth. “I’m not giving these up.”
You stare at him. “Are you serious right now?!”
“I have priorities,” he mumbles around a fry.
You both scramble to hide. Bucky throws his hoodie over your head like a blanket and pulls you into the shadows. You’re both giggling, trying to be quiet. Bucky looks like he’s having the time of his life.
Below, Sam looks up for a second, squinting. “…Did you hear something?”
Peter shrugs. “Maybe a raccoon?”
You whisper, “We are the raccoons.”
Somehow, you manage to escape without being seen.
Back at the compound, breathless and laughing in the hallway, Bucky presses you against the wall and kisses you again.
“Next time,” he murmurs, “I’m buying us disguises.”
“…Like wigs?”
He grins. “I was thinking matching mustaches.”
You snort-laugh so hard, someone passing by stares at you suspiciously.
In the next morning , you’re minding your business in the common room, nursing a coffee, when you hear “Yo, Bucky… since when do you eat at Cheesy Billy’s Burgers?”
Your stomach drops.
You turn just in time to see Sam waving a greasy, crumpled receipt like it’s evidence in a murder case.
“Found this in your jacket pocket, man. Thought you hated that place.”
Bucky blinks. Looks at you. Then back at Sam.
“I… don’t remember going there.”
Classic.
Natasha, from the couch “Wasn’t that the night you said you were doing recon?”
Tony walks in with a mug. “Wait, wait—Bucky Barnes ordered a Double Cheesezilla with extra onion rings and a milkshake. Who are you?”
You’re biting your lip so hard trying not to laugh, you might bleed. Bucky looks at you, then back at them, completely straight-faced.
“Maybe it was Steve’s jacket?” Bucky offers. “Old jacket. Probably Steve.”
Steve, walking by “What?”
“Nothing.” Bucky blurts.
Later, in the hallway, you tackle him into a storage closet and whisper, “You kept the receipt?!”
“You said it was the best burger you’d ever had. I panicked and wanted to remember the order.”
Your heart melts. “You’re unbelievable.”
He shrugs, grinning. “You love me.”
You kiss him, just once. “Unfortunately, yes.”
[Peter Maximoff x Female!Reader]
Synopsis: Your best friend (if you’d even call him that), is an annoying piece of work 99% of the time. But that 1%? That 1% is pretty special.
WC: 1513
Category: Fluff, Irritated!Reader, Mentions of Migraines
My first Evan Peters fic? Lets go.
『••✎••』
Being friends with that white-haired speedster meant you never had a moment of quiet. The guy was just so fast that you never had a second to blink without him pulling a prank on you, which is why you were constantly on edge around him. You could never trust him.
But that didn't mean that he didn't have his moments.
You were on the floor, eyes shut, attempting to fade the raging migraine out. You made your room into a dark cave and had been there all day, and yet, the pain in your head only grew.
By the time you heard your door creak open, you already felt the presence and the air in the room shift. It was almost like a ghost was floating through the doorway.
"No." The voice was quiet, and the sound was barely audible.
The soft footsteps stopped, and you opened one eye, seeing the blurred white figure. Your vision was blurry, and everything was doubled, but you could make out the face.
"You locked me out." The tone wasn't accusatory or playful. It was a soft, concerned tone that made your chest squeeze.
You rolled your head back, trying to look up at him.
"Sorry," you croaked. "But I’m also not sorry. I needed the silence."
"Yeah, yeah," he said dismissively. He crouched down his hand landing on your arm. His skin was cold against yours. "I know you secretly look forward to our little hangouts."
"No, I don't," you grumbled. "And I especially don't right now."
"Can’t even handle my presence without getting whiplash? Man, I must be really awesome."
You could faintly make out his smug smirk, and it made you snort, only worsening your headache.
"Just..." You waved your hand at him. "Get out. Leave."
He, in fact, did not leave. Instead, he stood up and went over to your bed.
You watched him in confusion as he took off his shoes, and then, with a quick flash of light, he was beside you once again, a blanket suddenly wrapped around him.
"Wh-" You were cut off as the blanket was draped around you, and you found yourself pulled up from the ground.
Peter's arm slipped around your shoulders, and he led you over to the bed. He pulled back the covers, and you climbed in, still unsure of what was going on.
Once you were in bed, he pulled the covers back up, and before you could say anything, his headset was ripped from your dresser. He placed them over his ears and lay down beside you.
He looked at you and nodded his head, giving you a thumbs-up.
You just stared at him, completely confused, but his gaze was unwavering. You let out a sigh, deciding to just roll with it. You were too tired to deal with Peter's bullshit anyway.
You rested your head on the pillow and shut your eyes.
A few moments later, a tune started playing, the music filling your ears. Not the loud, classic rock he usually blasted, but a soothing acoustic.
"You’re a fan of the Beatles?" You asked, surprised. You fluttered your eyes only to see Peter's face correctly. He looked like he was in deep thought. And with the soothing music from his Walkman (that he obviously lent to you) and the quiet, you couldn't help but feel a small tug on your heart.
He shrugged. "It just felt like the right song for the mood."
"Meaning… me dying?"
"Oh, stop being dramatic," he rolled his eyes. "Your little brain is just confused from having a devilishly handsome man lay in bed with you."
"You do realize I’ve had this for days now, right?"
"Alright, so, a devilishly handsome man around you. Is that better?"
"I can’t believe I let you in here," you grumbled, closing your eyes once more.
"Don't lie," he said, a little louder than usual since the music was loud in your ears. "You know you like my company—that and my box of sweets."
What box of—
Your eyes opened, and you looked up, seeing him holding a box of chocolate-covered almonds. Your heart did a flip.
"Is this... " You reached for the box, and he handed it to you.
"They're the good stuff. None of that cheap candy crap."
"Wow, you eat something other than Twinkies? I'm impressed," you teased, taking a piece and popping it into your mouth.
"Hey, don't hate the Twinkies. You ever try them with ice cream? It's great. It's like cake, but it's not, ya know? They're just so squishy, but the flavor is there."
"Uh, ew?"
"What, are you some fancy girl? Too high class for my delicious desserts?"
"Yeah, that's exactly it," you laughed, shaking your head. You rested your head on the pillow again.
"Whatever," he chuckled. "Eat your expensive ass almonds. I had to pay actual money for those, and I'm pretty sure Hank's going to notice they're gone."
That made you sit up despite the pounding in your head. "You stole them?! Oh my god, what's wrong with you?!"
"What?" he looked at you innocently. So I stole a box of chocolates. Big deal. The guy's rich. He never notices when I swipe his food. He'll just assume he forgot to put them away or something."
"Ugh, you are such an ass."
"You say ass; I say awesome."
"No," you said, putting another almond into your mouth. "Ass."
"Alright, fine. But, hey, look, who’s still eating the stolen chocolates?"
"Yeah, well," you smirked, taking another one. " Technically, I didn’t steal it. You did. So I can have a clear conscience."
"Ah, I see," he grinned. "Well, in that case, have another. Grab as many as you want. My treat."
You stared at him. "Okay, who are you, and what did you do with Peter?"
"What?"
"This," you gestured towards him. "All of this. You're never nice."
"Well, when you've had a migraine that's lasted for three days, you kinda learn to have a little empathy for that person."
"Three days?" you said, shocked. "Wait, how did you know the exact amount of time?"
"Don’t let anyone tell you you’re just a pretty face… I’m an all-seeing god, remember? Nothing can get by me."
"Except when Apocalypse broke—"
"Okay! Okay, I don’t need to relive that, alright? Sheesh, you're worse than Raven."
You grinned, taking another almond.
"Thanks," you said sincerely.
"For what? Comparing you to the blue lady? Anytime."
"No," you rolled your eyes. "I mean, for not pulling a… well, you. I really do appreciate it."
"Does this mean you’re leaving the Batcave? If we're getting sappy, then I should probably head out. I don’t want to risk my rep."
"You and I both know you have no reputation."
"True," he smiled. But hey, a guy can dream, right?"
You laughed, shaking your head. You were about to lay back down when he spoke up again.
"Actually," he said, looking at the ceiling, "there is one thing I'm good at."
"What's that?"
He didn't say anything. He just stared at the ceiling.
"Pete?"
His head whipped around to you, and with the same speed, he was leaning over you, his face inches away from yours.
"Peter, what—"
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to your ear, and the comment you were about to say died in your throat.
"I can shut up."
The sound of his voice, so soft and low, sent shivers down your spine. He pulled away and gave you a quick smile.
"Just something to think about," he said, and you could see the red tint on his cheeks. He sat up and stood in front of you before you could say anything else.
"You can give the Walkman back whenever, so, uh, don't worry about it. Anyway, I gotta get going. You know, stuff to do and snacks to eat." He turned towards the door. "Anyway, feel better. Later."
And before you could comprehend what had just happened, he was gone just like the wind.
You sat in your bed, still feeling the phantom feeling of his breath on your ear.
And ironically, the pain in your head was starting to fade.
So, yes. Despite him being an annoying little shit, he did have his moments. Genuine, quiet, caring moments. And it always made you question whether or not he was secretly a clone.
You were still staring at the door, your mind running a mile a minute.
But then, as if he could read your thoughts, he peeked his head back into your room.
"Oh, and if you tell anyone about this, I'll tell everyone you're a huge Star Wars nerd."
He vanished, and a second later, he was back once more.
"Also, I definitely didn’t steal that Walkman from a certain someone, so, uh, have fun with the mixtape!"
With that, he was gone.
You rolled your eyes and laid back down, putting the headphones back on.
"Ass."
You will definitely be visiting the white-haired speedster tomorrow. He may have his moments, but that doesn't mean he doesn't deserve some good old-fashioned payback.
summary: when you reach out to joaquin waving the white flag, you realize how broken he's been.
pairing: touch starved!joaquin torres x ex!f!reader
contents: exes to lovers, food and alcohol mention, angst, canon typical trauma/trauma responses, get back together fic, kissing
wc: 1,988
an: i combined my idea for touched starved!joaquin with this request about yearning. sorry it took so long anon and i hope you like it <3
danny ramirez characters masterlist
He’s late to the housewarming. Not by much, but enough that he has to squeeze through a half-shut gate and slip past a crowd already buzzing with drinks and music. His shoulders still feel tight from the last mission—three cities, too many close calls, and not enough sleep. He almost didn’t come.
But when he saw your name at the top of the invite sent only to him, group chat, no passive-aggressive message he could say no to you.
It read simple and gave him a glimmer of hope:
I hope you can come. it’s not a trap. peace offering.
He doesn’t deserve the invite or your kindness, not after how he’d withdrawn so abruptly 8 months ago. He thought ending things before he could truly disappoint you or worse— scare you with one of his missions was the right thing to do. But now he can’t convince himself that this invite isn’t some sort of chance to at least make things right. Better.
Inside, the lights are warm, soft, glowing off glasses and muted green walls. There’s someone laughing in the kitchen, someone singing too loud on the patio. He catches a glimpse of you through the open door—perched on the porch bench, the setting sun’s rays on your cheeks, telling a story with your hands.
Joaquin’s heart stutters.
Just the sight of you makes him feel like it’s been an eternity. He hadn’t forgotten how beautiful you are but clearly he had let the weight of it slip away to protect himself.
You look up, like you feel him before you even see him. And when your eyes meet, something in his chest aches. That’s all it takes for everything he’s been trying to outrun to come flooding back.
How safe and understood he felt when the two of you did nothing but lay under the clouds. How warm his heart got at the sound of your laughter. How easy it was until he got into his head about being right for you.
You smile at him.
It’s not the same smile as before, but it’s not cold either. Cautious and familiar, but no less warm. Because you’re happy to see Joaquin, but now in the face of him you’re afraid everything you’ve worked for will come crumbling down.
“Hey,” you say softly, walking inside from the deck toward him with a drink in hand. Your voice is light but not performative as you try to play it cool. “Llegaste.”
He nods. “Yeah. I couldn’t—yeah.”
You don’t hesitate. You step right up to him and wrap up your arms around his middle. It’s causal, natural and despite your past, you don’t even think about the possible impacts.
The simplicity of it all hits him like a wave.
He stiffens for just a second, like he wasn’t expecting it. Like he’s forgotten what it feels like to be touched gently, without purpose or urgency. Or violence. Then his arms come up slowly, almost uncertainly, and he lets himself hold you—just enough so that it’s not awkward. Not enough for everything he wants.
One of your hands slides up his back once, rubbing tenderly. It’s a tiny gesture but he swears he could cry.
“Estas bien?” you ask, pulling back just enough to look at him.
He nods again, softer this time. “Ahora sí.”
You try not to show that his words affect you, simply giving him the best smile you can before untangling yourself from him. Gesturing for him to follow you, you make your way into the kitchen fishing out a beer and handing it to him. “Here.”
He takes it, fingers brushing yours, and his grip tightens on the bottle like it’s an anchor. “Thanks.”
Later, after a few brief hellos and introductions, you sit beside each other on the porch. He’s barely touched his beer but neither of you have noticed.
There’s easy conversation on your part, starting with how you found the house and decided it was the one you wanted. You tell him about the chaos in the kitchen earlier tonight, a spilled pitcher of sangria. About the neighbor who brought way too many folding chairs.
He barely says anything, he simply listens. Listens like he’s afraid he’ll miss something if he blinks, like he’ll wake up from a dream.
He watches the way your eyes crinkle when you laugh. The way your knee bounces when you’re excited. The way you don’t flinch being this close to him, how you lean closer. You aren’t afraid to touch him, a nudge of shoulders here, a brush of his knee there when you say something funny.
It seems like it comes easy to you and god, has he missed this.
“I miss this,” he says quietly, gaze fixed on the beer bottle in his hands. Then, after a breath: “I miss… you.”
There’s several beats of silence. He doesn’t have the heart to look up at you, to see the surprise on your face.
You look at him, cheeks warm, stomach twisting with anticipation. You hadn’t expected him to say something like that when he was the one that ended things the way he did.
When you speak again your voice is quiet but firm. “Not here.”
Even then, you touch his knee—just a brush of your fingers—but it feels like a jolt. He follows you without thinking.
You lead him down the back steps, past string lights and potted herbs, to the edge of the backyard. There’s a small pond there, still and starting to glow under the emerging moon.
You’re a ways away from everyone else. It feels like you're a world away, a veil falling between you and Joaquin and the world. Everything else is muffled, distorted. It’s just the two of you.
You turn to face him, your eyes guarded. “I miss you too,” you say. “I never stopped wanting this. You were the one that…”
His chest tightens, but before he can reach for you, you add—gentle, but unwavering:
“But, I’m not doing that again. I’m not getting close just to watch you disappear when things get hard. If you want me—really want me—then you have to stay. You have to try.”
He swallows hard, the words sitting heavy between you.
You can see, nearly hear the gears turning in his head. There’s conflict, something soft and something so scared in his eyes as he lets your words sink in. You step forward then, and when your arms wrap around his shoulders, he goes completely still. There’s a breath he doesn’t take. A flicker of disbelief in his eyes. Like your touch might vanish if he moves too fast.
This time you notice.
“Què te pasa? Hmm, baby bird?” You ask tenderly and it breaks something open in him.
Slowly, shakily, he lets go of the tension. He leans in—into you—and his arms finally wrap around your waist. His hold isn’t tight, but you can feel the starved urgency in his fingertips.
His face presses into your shoulder, and the sound he makes is quiet, but wrecked. A broken exhale like it’s the first breath he’s taken in weeks.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, voice cracking. “I thought I was doing right by you. Letting you go. I didn’t want to hurt you.”
You hold him tighter, and his grip flinches like he’s not used to being held back.
“I know,” you say softly, your hand tangling in the hair at the nape of his neck. He shudders under your touch and your heart squeezes again. “I know, baby,” you assure him gently.
You brush your lips against his temple, and he tenses just slightly at the contact—like it overwhelms him. His breath hitches, grip tightening around your hips like he’s afraid to let go now that he’s here in your arms.
“Next time,” you murmur, fingers sliding further into his hair, “you just talk to me.”
He nods into you, arms wrapping so tight around you, holding on like this might all slip away.
You stay like that for a while. Wrapped up in each other, warm and quiet. Until the party noise fades into background hum and there’s only moonlight and the hush of the pond.
Eventually, you both sit in the grass, your shoulders brushing. He finally starts to talk to you, to tell you everything he’s endured. Why he pulled away and what plagues him now; months apart and they’re still the same thing.
He talked about the missions. The pressure. The exhaustion.
About how he didn’t know the full effect of what it was doing to him until he stepped back into your orbit and felt seen again.
Your fingers drift over his hand as he speaks. When he falters, you gently trace one of the faint scars on his knuckles. He goes completely still at the contact—like even that touch is more kindness than he’s used to.
“You have to take better care of yourself,” you say with a half-smile, nudging him gently. “Or I’m calling Sam.”
That finally earns a real laugh—small, tired, but real.
“You wouldn’t.”
“Oh, I would,” you tease. “I’d guilt him into dragging your ass back here for a proper nap and a shower.”
He nudges your knee with his, smiling. You both fall quiet; it’s comfortable.The pond glows beside them. The world slows down.
And for the first time in a long time, he doesn’t feel like he’s on borrowed time.
He just feels… held. Seen and understood. Like he’s home, in a way that matters.
—
Later that night, after most of the guests have left and the house is dim and quiet, he helps you carry in the empty bottles and leftover snacks. The porch lights hum low behind them, and the kitchen smells faintly like lime and basil and whatever candle someone brought as a gift.
You’re both barefoot now, toes brushing the tile. He hands you the last bowl and leans against the counter like he doesn’t want to leave.
You sense it immediately, glancing over at him. “You okay?”
He nods. “Yeah. I just… don’t want this to end.”
A smile tugs at your mouth. You step closer, fingers brushing his wrist, and this time he leans into the touch like he needs it to breathe.
“So don’t let it,” you murmur. “Don’t push me away again.”
He swallows. “Would it be too fast if I said I want to see you tomorrow?”
You smile deepens. “Are you asking me on a date, Lieutenant?”
Joaquin grins, soft and sheepish. He finally looks like himself. “Yeah, I am.”
“Well then,” you say, stepping in and tilting your chin up, “you better kiss me goodnight properly.”
You don’t give him time to overthink it. You press your lips to his—soft and warm, lingering just enough to make his breath catch. He kisses you back like he’s still afraid he’ll mess this up, but you thread your fingers through his and holds him close.
When you pull back, he exhales shakily.
You tap your fingers lightly against his chest. “Pick me up at seven. And wear something that says ‘I’ve stopped being emotionally unavailable.’”
He throws his head back with laughter, then groans like that’s going to be a real task. “That narrows my wardrobe down to, like, one shirt.”
Gripping his shirt playfully, you pull him a little closer. “Then wear it.”
Somewhere between getting home and putting his phone on the charger, Joaquin sees the text from Sam. Seems you had followed up on your threat to tell Sam about tonight.
Sam: I heard you finally stopped being stupid.
Joaquin stares at it for a second before the typing bubble pops up again.
Sam:Bout damn time. You owe me twenty bucks. And a six-pack.
He shakes his head, smiling down at the screen. His reply is simple:
Worth it.
And when he turns off the light and sinks into bed, his heart is full.
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Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Summary: Sam’s getting way too suspicious about your secret relationship with Bucky.
Word Count: 1.6k
Warnings: humor, fluff, secret dating, laundry room shenanigans, sam wilson being done
A/N: this can be read as a standalone even though it's part of a series called "You Said What". It doesn't necessarily follow a specific order, but if you want to check out the other parts, here they are: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6 thanks for reading, i hope you like it :)
Sam didn’t sleep well.
It wasn’t the coffee. It wasn’t even the lingering PTSD from a week spent chasing Hydra remnants. No, this was different.
This was gut feeling. Instinct.
He was standing in the kitchen, hair wild, hoodie misaligned, and eyes like a war veteran who’d seen things and couldn’t unsee them. The clock blinked a smug 7:03 a.m. He poured black coffee like a man betrayed by the very concept of sleep.
That’s when he saw it.
Two mugs on the counter.
One had your initials. The other—a vintage WWII fighter plane sticker. It hadn’t been there last night. He knew, because he always did a final kitchen sweep before bed. Counters clean. Dishes put away. Mugs? Accounted for.
His eye twitched.
“…Barnes,” Sam whispered.
He crouched slowly, inspecting the mugs like they might start confessing their crimes.
Then the hallway creaked. Sam turned so fast he sloshed coffee onto his hoodie.
You entered the room, yawning dramatically, hoodie sleeves engulfing your hands.
“Morning,” you mumbled.
Sam squinted. “Is it? Is it really?”
You blinked. “…Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” he said, with the exact tone of a man who was absolutely not fine. He walked to the table and pulled out a chair like it owed him money. “Sit.”
“Why?”
“Because I have questions.”
“I’m not under interrogation.”
“You are now.”
“…Sam.”
“Tell me what you were doing between 0500 and 0700 hours.”
“Sleeping.”
“Alone?”
You squinted. “What kind of creepy follow-up—?”
Sam narrowed his eyes like a raccoon about to steal a whole rotisserie chicken. “I knew it. There’s a cover-up.”
You grabbed a piece of toast and headed for the hallway. “There’s a cover-up on your brain, Wilson.”
“I’ve seen the signs,” Sam called after you. “The glances! The whispers! The ‘accidental’ brush of hands during mission briefings!”
“Maybe I’m just clumsy!” you yelled.
“And matching mugs?”
“That sticker was mine first!”
Before Sam could yell something, Bucky entered the room, with aexpression criminally smug. He looked like the kind of man who had just done something worth hiding.
“Morning,” Bucky said, voice low and gravelly. He moved to the coffee pot.
Sam’s eyes followed him like a hawk on its sixth espresso.
“You okay?” Bucky asked.
“I’m great,” Sam replied. “Y/N just left.”
“Cool.”
“Came in lookin’ real tired.”
“People get tired.”
“You look real tired.”
Bucky paused, looked Sam dead in the eye. “You implying something?”
Sam sipped his coffee. “I don’t know. You implying something?”
They stared each other down. The air crackled. Somewhere in the distance, a tumbleweed rolled by. A raven cawed.
“You need sleep,” Bucky muttered.
“I’ll sleep when the truth sleeps,” Sam snapped back.
Then Sam dramatically left the room—only to storm back in ten seconds later to grab a banana. He peeled it with authority and left again.
Later that morning, when Sam had finally left for a jog—or more accurately, a neighborhood reconnaissance mission—you found yourself back in the kitchen. You were putting away a dish, humming quietly to yourself, when a pair of warm arms slid around your waist.
You didn’t jump. You never did when it was him.
“Hey,” Bucky murmured against your neck, voice soft now, stripped of the earlier smugness he reserved for sparring with Sam. His lips brushed your skin like a secret.
“Hey yourself,” you whispered, leaning back into his chest. “You’re not worried Sam’s going to install surveillance cameras?”
“He probably already has.” You both laughed.
He rested his chin on your shoulder. “I left my mug out on purpose, you know.”
You turned your head to look at him, brow raised. “Seriously?”
Bucky shrugged, expression boyishly proud. “He’s been circling for weeks. Figured we’d give him a trail to follow. Let the man feel like he cracked the case.”
You chuckled, shaking your head. “You are so chaotic.”
He grinned. “You love it.”
You turned in his arms, resting your hands on his chest. “Yeah… I kinda do.”
He kissed you then. Slow. Sweet. Familiar. The kind of kiss that said, even with a super-spy roommate and questionable mugs, this? This is real.
Later that night you bumped into Sam, sitting on the couch. He was hunched forward, elbows on knees, staring ahead
“Where are you going?” he asked, voice low and suspicious, eyes narrowing like you’d just confessed to treason.
You froze. “Uh. Laundry?”
“Interesting,” he said, voice dripping with suspicion. “You know who else said they had laundry tonight?”
You blinked. “…Literally everyone who owns clothes?”
Sam didn’t smile. He leaned in, voice lowering like he was revealing national security secrets. “Barnes. Same night. Same floor. Same time.”
You paused just long enough to regret getting out of your room.
“It’s a laundry room, Sam,” you said flatly. “That’s how they work. People… use it.”
“Mmmhm,” he replied, writing something cryptic in his notebook. The pen squeaked aggressively against the page.
Just then, the door swung open—and in walked Bucky Barnes, freshly showered, damp hair swept back like a shampoo commercial, whistling something suspiciously upbeat.
“Y/N. Wilson,” he greeted smoothly.
“Barnes,” Sam said, staring like he was trying to burn a hole through his soul with his eyes.
You smiled. Just a regular smile. Harmless. No romantic undertones. Just two coworkers… being cordial.
Totally.
“You know... I was asking Y/N here,” Sam said, still squinting, “about her suspiciously coordinated laundry schedule.”
Bucky didn’t miss a beat. “Must be fate.”
You coughed, choking down a laugh.
Sam slammed his notebook shut with the kind of theatrical flair that screamed “I was born for this drama.”
“Enough. You think I’m not onto you. But I see things.”
Bucky raised a brow. “You seeing ghosts again?”
“I’m seeing clues, Barnes. Don’t play dumb. You two doing laundry together. The mugs. The vanishing act during last Tuesday’s debrief—twenty minutes. Both of you. Gone.”
You opened your mouth, searching for a reasonable explanation, but let’s be honest—this was Sam. There was no “reasonable” left. This man had turned your laundry schedule into a covert op.
You crossed your arms. “We went to get snacks.”
“Snacks,” Sam echoed flatly.
“Yes,” you said, trying to maintain dignity. “You know. Human food. Fuel. Chips. The sacred post-mission ritual.”
Sam’s expression didn’t change. “For twenty minutes.”
“There was a vending machine incident,” Bucky added smoothly, stepping closer, unbothered. “Y/N had a standoff with a bag of peanut M&Ms. It got intense.”
You rolled your eyes as Bucky leaned casually against the doorframe, looking way too smug for someone being accused of laundry-based espionage.
Sam was relentless. “You think this is a game? Because I’ve got spreadsheets. I’ve got charts. I have timestamps.”
“I’m flattered,” Bucky replied, folding his arms. “Didn’t realize I was your top case file.”
“You’re not,” Sam snapped. “You’re just the most suspicious.”
You shook your head, already backing toward the hallway. “Okay, well, I’m gonna go… do the thing. With the clothes. Like a normal human person.”
“Sure you are,” Sam muttered, squinting again like he was two seconds away from installing security cameras.
“Goodnight, Wilson,” Bucky said with a wink. And then—because of course—he followed you out.
“Hey!” Sam called. “This isn’t over!”
You didn’t turn around, but you did hear the sound of him furiously scribbling in that cursed notebook again.
You and Bucky sat side by side on top of the industrial dryer, the hum of the spinning machines filling the quiet room. A single overhead light flickered occasionally, casting a soft glow over the laundry baskets at your feet. The scent of fabric softener lingered in the warm air.
“He’s going to lose his mind,” you murmured, folding a hoodie with unnecessary precision.
“He already has,” Bucky said, smirking. “Tried to stick a tracker in my jacket this morning.”
You laughed, bumping your shoulder into his. “We should start leaving fake clues. Plant a puzzle piece under his pillow. Hang a tie in the garage.”
“I already put a sock in the fridge,” Bucky said casually, reaching over to pull a warm towel from the dryer.
You turned to look at him, mouth open in delight. “You didn’t.”
“I did. Red. Argyle. No explanation.”
You grinned, shaking your head. “I love you.”
Bucky chuckled, leaning in to kiss your temple. “I know.”
You went quiet for a beat, letting the rhythm of the machines and the safe warmth between you fill the space. His knee rested against yours. The scent of his cologne barely clung to the edge of his freshly laundered shirt.
He reached for your hand, twining his fingers through yours beneath the basket of still-warm socks. “He’s getting close, though. We are getting pretty obvious.”
“You wanna stop?” you asked, turning toward him.
He looked at you—really looked. And it was all soft eyes, steady presence, and a patience you hadn’t known you needed until him.
“Not a chance.”
Bucky smiled, warm and easy, and pressed his forehead lightly to yours.
“So,” you whispered, “what are we going to do when Sam actually proves something?”
“We deny everything.”
You laughed. “Even under interrogation?”
“Especially under interrogation.”
One day, he’d prove it.
But not today.
Meanwhile in the living room, Sam was writing in his notebook. On the top of the page:
CASE #110: They’re DEFINITELY Dating. And beneath it, scrawled in increasingly frantic handwriting:
shared laundry = suspicious
“Coincidentally” always sitting next to each other
Y/N smiled at him like he invented air.
Bucky smiled back.
FRIDAY pinged softly. “Sir, your blood pressure is elevated.”
“Because there’s a LIE in this house, Friday!”
War was still on.
But as long as you had Bucky Barnes looking at you like you were his whole world?
You were definitely still winning.
taglist: @svtbpbts @cupids-mf-arrow @whitewolfluvr @cece2608 @yehfitoormera @yesiamthatwierd@poodleofstardust @poodleofstardust @homeless-clown @kitasownworld @loversrocktvgirl2
A/N: it's me again, hi. just wanted to say a big thank you for all the comments and feedback i've been getting from all of you. never thought that a one-shot could turn into a series with already SEVEN PARTS. anyway, just thank you all again. i hope you're liking where this is going. see you next chapter <3
Mel • 18 • 1# loki defender
101 posts