I Caught Myself Breaking Down Again Thinking About How Lilia Really Doesn't Have Long To Live. Can We

║Venti║Tag! You're It

Requested from Wattpad.

Gender-neutral.

Fluff.

Word count: 1.7k

---

You sat on the cool, green grass, watching blankly at the birds that flocks by every now and then before sighing, leaning back against the big ol' tree that was about Mondstadt's symbol at this point. It was an awfully slow day with not much excitement going since the traveller from who knows where fixed the whole Stormterror chaos. But honestly, you were quite enjoying the peace that has been restored in the City of Freedom that allowed you to slack off, closing your eyes and heaving a soft sigh.

Unknowingly, a cheeky bard crept up to your person, silent as a mouse. You wouldn't know how he would do it when the squirrels' feet are pitter-pattering the grass beside you and up to the tree.

With a hand reaching to your shoulders, too cold for a day such as this and too pale for a normal human being, your insides leapt out of you and made you stupefied for a brief moment. "Ehe, I didn't know you get scares so easily, (Y/N)~" You turned your head, eyes wide from the fright and a mix of disbelief at the number one bard of Mondstadt. "I was going to spook you with a 'boo' but it seems that you are quite sensitive." He giggles and you look down to his feet and see that he was using his Anemo to move closer to you undetected.

"Don't do that ever again! I thought you were a hilichurl," you breathed, calming your racing heart. He sits beside you, crossing his legs. "Sorry, sorry, I promise I will not do it.. For a while," he adds and you glared at the male. His hands shot up in defence, giving you a close-eyed, mischievous smile. "Anyway, what are you up to?" he asks, moving onto another topic.

"What does it look like?" you ask with a bored expression. His eyes look to the side at the vast green around. "Uh, playing hide and seek?" he purposely plays the dumb card. You were not the least bit amused. "Do you see anyone else around?" you questioned. "I was just resting. There's really not much to do other than looking at the animals at play." You closed your eyes and leaned unguardedly against the tree. You were sure that no one else will pop on by and if there was, you were sure that Venti would be the first to spot. He had a faster reaction time than yours after all.

Venti starts to hum a tune that was most likely made up on the spot since he didn't bring his lyre. It was good just like the rest of his songs and always had that drowsy effect on you. It helped since you just wanted to sleep if there was nothing else to do.

When Venti notices you were about to drift off, he completely stops and turns to you with a cheeky grin and tapping your shoulders repeatedly. "Hey, hey, (Y/N), you want to play hide and seek tag?" he asks. You were shaken up from what could have been your sleep and stare at him with a raised brow while looking annoyed. "Seriously, Venti? Can't we play once I've slept?" "Nope! You will just sleep until the sun has set, leaving me bored."

"You can always sleep during the night so get up and let's play!" He tugs on your sleeves. You groaned. "Venti, take a look around you-- there is literally no place to hide except those hilichurl camps." "So we'll use them as hiding locations too!" He grins.

You stared at him in disbelief, but upon seeing his bright smile, you could do nothing except sigh and accept. "Alright." "Yay! Okay, okay, I want to hide first!" he exclaims, getting up. "You better not peak~" You roll your eyes but did as told, covering your eyes and hearing him flee. You counted up to thirty-- enough time for an Anemo vision wielder such as himself to find a decent hiding spot.

"Alright, ready or not, here I come," you say loud enough and hope it reaches the male. You started looking around the tree but later started looking elsewhere when he wasn't hiding there. It was a good thing that the hilichurls from the camps were dealt with so you and Venti could play without getting into harm's way.

When you went to one of them, your eyes and ears quickly moved their attention to a green hat that rested behind a rock, making sounds of laughter. Well, it wasn't the hat that was laughing but rather, the person wearing the hat. You tried desperately hard not to break into a peal of laughter as you watch him crouch behind the rock.

Slowly, you crept up to his hiding spot, the soft rustling of grass under your feet barely audible, the sound of animals helping it fade from the male's ears. "Boo!" You put a hand on his shoulders, looking down at the bard. "Gah!" He turns his head to look over his shoulder. He felt his own heart race, not knowing you were approaching. "You scared me!" "You deserve it for scaring me earlier." You crossed your arms, grinning at your victorious approach.

"You're a terrible hider, Venti. You forgot to take your hat off," you said, pointing to your own head to point his own. "Ah, I totally forgot." He laughs, taking his hat off and looking at it with a smile. "It also didn't help that you were giggling." He sticks his tongue out and scratches the back of his head. "Ehe."

"Anyway, I guess it's my turn now?" you say, your words sounding more like a question than a statement. He nods his head. "Mm. You better not give away your location~" he says, turning around and putting his hands on his eyes; counting down. You quickly made a dash away from him, heading towards the big tree. You looked around for a good hiding spot, not wanting it to be obvious such as a hilichurl camp; that would be the first place he would definitely look into.

A sudden idea had struck you and you stared at the tree, eyeing its sturdy branches. "This place would be a good spot." With that, you climb the tree, aiming to go for the highest branch. Upon the highest branch, you could peek through the leaves at the sun and at your surroundings below. Surely, this was the best spot to look out for Venti.

You spot him leave the camp that he hid, now on a mission to find and touch you. You concealed a laugh, putting your hand on your mouth although it shouldn't matter since you doubt he could hear you from where you were.

Full of confidence, you propped yourself to lean against the tree, legs dangling off on each side of the branch. This would take a while, you thought to yourself and close your eyes, full of confidence. Closing your eyes was the biggest mistake because the next time you opened them, the sky was a mix of red and orange. "Hah? Did I fall asleep?" you half-asked yourself, moving your legs so that they were both dangling off on the same side as you rub the heavy feeling from your eyes.

You were still at the same spot but Venti was nowhere to be seen. You looked around at the nearby camps but to only see that there wasn't even the slightest movement to be seen. Were you left alone? Did he get bored and leave you there? No, that does not sound like Venti at all.. Well, maybe-- if he was playing a prank.

Suddenly, sounds of rustling leaves from above you were heard and then, "Yes, you did." Venti pops his head close to yours, upsidedown as he grins at you. "Ah!" Startled at the sudden closeness and scare, you fell backwards-- falling off of the branch.

"(Y/N)!" Venti extends a hand and in doing so, you stopped falling midway to the ground. He used his Anemo and slowly guided you back up to where you originally sat. You stare off with widened eyes, too slow to comprehend what just had happened. "H, hey, are you okay?" Venti asks, putting a hand on your shoulder.

Apparently, that was all it took to shake you to function as before. You lightly hit his chest. "Do you plan on killing me with a heart attack?" you questioned, eyes not reflecting amusement. He awkwardly chuckles. "Sorry, I didn't think I'd scare you."

You sighed. Seeing his face, you couldn't stay mad at him for too long. "I thought you left," you confessed, changing topics. "Eh? And never get the chance to see your adorable face sleeping? No way!" He flies to sit beside you on the branch, completely forgetting what he just did. "You watched me sleep for how long?" you questioned, raising a brow. "The moment I found you! It didn't take long since you fell off the branch when you were sleeping," he says. "It was a good thing that I saw and caught you in time."

"I fell off?" you repeat to which he nods. "That's when I found out that you were sleeping." You sigh. "Thank you," you said, making the male all smiles at the words of gratitude. "Hehe, anything to see you sleep!" He smiles, closing his eyes as he does so.

"Anyway, I'm getting hungry so I'll go home," you said. "What do you want to eat?" "I can join you?" he asks, eyes reflecting the sky when it turns dark-- full of stars. "Well, it's the least I could do for being saved twice from my death," you point out in a light tone. "Yay!" he cheers and guided you and himself down the tree. "I could really go for some dandelion--" "No." That one word made him pout, staring at you with puppy-like eyes. "You will have homecooked food. Not wine," you said. He sighs defeatedly. "Alright.."

---

I got Rosaria on the first 10 rolls, Keqing on my 50/50 on the 50th roll, and Childe on the 30th roll when the pity had reset. :)

Bennett did not come home.

This is a bit embarrassing to say, but I want to share it. So, I had this dream where I was in Genshin. All of the characters were there, inside Angel's Share. For some reason that I don't know about, we made some sort of circle and I was asked who I liked more. Venti said something like, "You'll pick me, right, [my name]?" and getting close to me with that smile of his. Diluc then said something like, "I highly doubt she'd choose you." I know he said something meaner because it hurt Venti. Others agreed with Diluc. Zhongli and Scara looked very smugged in the background because they know how much I love the two. Venti continued to smile despite what Diluc said. I was angry at them all because that was just mean. So, in order to prove them all wrong, I went and hugged Venti and said, "Of course I'd choose Venti!" I imagined him to smell like flowers and was very warm and soft to the touch. He was taller than me too (which I expected, seeing as I am 4'9. Short human). When I woke up, I realized how touch starved I am. It was my first time hugging anybody, even if it was just in my dreams. I don't even remember the last time I hugged any of my family members. don't like the thought of having skin-to-skin interaction with anybody. But I literally cried after having that dream. •~•

Yes, i talked with her personally and she thinks it's funny that i discovered that I have a poor eyesight because of it. I thought it was normal for vision to be that blurry.

Oop-- I see we both have terrible sight. 😂

Announcement

Everyone I have found my iPad so I will be resuming my writing! Expect to see a new chapter of Read My Heart soon. :}

The way I found it was a bit funny though.. But that's a story for another time.

I'm almost finished chapter 2 for my "Read My Heart" series~ If you want to stay up to date with it, don't hesitate to tell me that you want to be tagged!

I wanna also put an announcement that I also have another series coming staring our resident Diasomnia gramps. :}

Oh, hello! this is my first time requesting anything- but i’d like to see Lilia Vanrouge x Reader (set in the past) but, Reader is on the opposite side of the war and finds him badly injured And takes care of him.

║Lilia Vanrouge║ Opposites of the War

Reader: No pronouns or description used. Gender neutral.

Warning(s): None

—

No one could imagine what it was like to be caught in between the human-fae war. It was a time of bloodshed. Cries from both elderly and children alike who weren’t spared from death. Many lives were lost and many villages crumbled down that only inhabited ruins would remain today.

“Sir Vanrouge!” A young fae called out towards a slightly taller male from the distance, his voice sounding urgent and panting by the sounds of it. In the distance, the man whom the fae called halts at the name. He was dressed in nothing but a black battle dress head to toe, a colour that came from and praised from the night skies that also matches the colour of his hair. It is also adorned in silver shoulder plates, a few chains that- for the most part- held his uniform and the cape that drapes over his back and of course, badges. Hard earned badges he had been rewarded from the amount of lives he’s taken and overall contribution he had partaken in.

The taller fae remained at a standstill, but it was still very clear that he was listening. The younger one stuttered the first word and had to take a moment to gulp down the nervousness that built up in his voice as well as straighten himself to be a more proper soldier. It was only to be expected. The fae before him had an overwhelming aura. Be it newcomers or long time soldiers of the same ranking as the dark fae, they would all tremble under the presence of his. This was a charm only the Lilia Vanrouge could have and no one else.

“Sir, the Queen would like to speak with you in the throne room..” He says. Despite the moment he had taken to breathe, his voice became softer towards the end.

There was silence once he finished speaking and he became nervous once more, thinking that he had upset the fae. “S-sir..? I-it’s an urgent— Eep!” The older fae turned his head over his shoulders and when he did, the young fae was spooked to be met with two, crimson eyes that glowed faintly.

“I-I’m sorry, sir!” Whatever courage the young fae had for war were all spent upon realizing that the fae was approaching him. He closes his eyes and stood still as a statue with his hands glued to his sides. He’s done for. He has upsetted a high-ranked official. He’ll surely—

A pale hand placed itself on his shoulders which made him flinch. He gulps back a lump and awaits for his impending death.

“General.”

Huh? He looks to his right to face the tall fae, a perplexed look evident on his face. The fae stares back with those alluring eyes and repeats himself but with more detail, “Address me as General.”

“O-oh, yes, Si— Uhm, General..” Satisfied, the general continues his walk to meet the Queen. The clacking of heels on the marble floor was all that could be heard before it stopped momentarily when large, creaking doors opened and then resuming, fading as soon as the doors closed.

“Your Majesty.” Lilia kneeled down on one knee and his right hand was closed into a fist over his heart while the other was fist closed on the ground. “Vanrouge.”

In front of him, the Queen of the Valley sits upon a throne adorned in thorns. If one trembles before the general, then they couldn’t even dare to even dream of being in the same room as the Queen if she ever permits an audience with her, that is. A great magician such as herself requires no more than one strong soldier such as Lilia and thus, would relay her wishes through him and him alone.

“I take it that your troops will be the one to lead the fight tomorrow?” She begins, her voice echoes in the huge room that was basically empty aside for the throne and a few, small items. “Yes, your majesty.”

“Very well. Then, you must take precaution as it seems that a few high-ranked sorcerers are amongst them,” she says and motions towards her familiar— a raven. “They appear to be doing their due diligence to hide them from our informants.”

“Your majesty, are you perhaps concerned for my wellbeing?” He asks, looking up to meet the eyes of the mother of all dark faes. Her face remained stoic and her eyes glowed a vibrant emerald green. “That, I am. I can’t have you dying.”

“Then set aside your worries, your majesty. It brings me shame that I have been held at such a high regard by you, yet is treated with pitiful thoughts,” Lilia confesses. “This can not do as I am merely a servant.”

The Queen remains silent and studies his face. His eyes, the colour of blood.. It almost seemed too perfect to the Queen. A weapon for war, a harbinger of death.. Born within her kingdom at the perfect time.

“.. Forgive my imprudence,” she says, her head still held high with the pride of a monarch. “I believe there is a mistake, your majesty. It is I who should ask for forgiveness for I seem to be lacking somewhere to have you worry. I will correct it.”

Knowing how the general will continue lowering himself, she heaves a sigh of defeat and even closes her eyes for a moment. “Very well.. I will await news once you return. You may leave.”

The door to the throne room opens once more and the sound of heels echoes down the hall once again.

Lilia Vanrouge, the Queen’s right hand man, is a terrifying creature.

—

“There is at least one, capable human sorcerer among them.. Their locations are unknown and they could very well be capable of teleportation.” Around Lilia, soldiers gather and listen in silence to the general’s words. “General, they are merehuman, aren’t they? Why do we need to be concerned?” One fae raises a hand and speaks, drawing the attention of both his comrades and the general.

This one is new, that much is evident by how cocky he presents himself. This, however, was quickly received with the most frightening glare from Lilia. “Eep!” The soldier was immediately humbled down, scared for his life. But, it wasn’t just them, those who saw his face also flinched and avoided looking at him.

There were only two facial expressions the fae would make; one being his usual, blank look and the second one was what this cocky fae received. It is clear that most opts to have the expressionless general.

“You seem rather new..” Lilia says calculatingly and in an eerily calm tone that was a stark difference to his face just a few seconds ago. “You must not have experience on the field or what these men have seen.

“If it were simply mere humans, why do you think that many of our men fell?” He repeats words from the young soldier in a sarcastic tone. The soldier bit the bottom of his lips, embarrassed and scared. “S-sorry, General Vanrouge..”

Lilia resumes talking about strategies and ways to counter attacks from the opposing team and as soon as the sun reached high above in the sky, both made their moves.

Who would have thought that things would go south for the General..

—

Hours went by and soon, his army of hundreds were stretched far and wide, being lured away with war. He is very much capable by himself so he ordered that if things should go as unplanned, that they were to leave him.

However, this would be critical when he finds himself facing off six human sorcerers whose faces were shadowed by their cloak. How clever, he thinks. He could tell that this was planned from the very beginning; to stretch his army thin and to take the head of their commander first. They did not care whether other of their soldiers died for they saw his head as a good reward for it.

Humans can be such a two-faced creature.. Boosting morale of their men without telling the real reason for the plan. He presumes that it was the doing of those higher than them.

Out of the six, only 3 seem to be high-ranked magic users. No worries, he’ll just take care of these—

“Guhk—!” He let his guard down and realized that there was one more hiding somewhere who made sure to mask their presence. He stumbles forward but still held his ground. “The General got hit!” One of them shouts and now before him, reveals six more other sorcerers including the one earlier.

These ones were weaker and used the bloodlust of the stronger ones to hide theirs, initially hiding from Lilia.

“Bind!” One of the three stronger ones, casts a spell and chains sprouts front the ground and binds his ankles to the soils.

He tilts his head to the ever darkening sky and slowly closes his eyes. Your majesty, do forgive me for overlooking your concerns.

“It’s over for you, monster!” One charges at him with a longsword with the intent to cleanly detach his head from his body.

—

Trekking through the now dark forest in silence, Lilia was obviously injured. Those humans were truly something. He was badly wounded with a hand over his stomach and was exhausted.

I must return to the camp..

But how could he at this rate when he is limping and his magic spent? He dares not try to push himself further in fear of an overblot. It’s alright. He has given orders to the lieutenant on what to do and practically lead the army in his absence.

That being said.. A rest wouldn’t hurt, right?

After looking at his surroundings to make sure there was no one in sight, he sits and leans against a tree. He only needs half a day— no, less than that— to be able to heal a bit of himself. However, the blow to his right shoulder by a spear— from the first ambusher— is bleeding a lot.

Whatever.. He’ll fix— Crack.

His eyebrows perks up and his ears sharpened. There was someone here. But where?

That was soon answered when he felt a slight tremble on the Earth’s surface. This thing.. It must have been at least ten feet. Could it be a giant? What would it be doing in this territory? Perhaps a monster has wandered in.. That’s no good.

Cautiously, he stands up and looks around. Thankfully, his kind allowed him to see better in the dark by ten folds than that of a human’s. He walks towards the booming sound and as soon as he was merely metres away, his eyes widen in disbelief and surprise. In front of him was—

“Alrighty!”

A voice could be heard just a few steps away and in the distance, he sees a house.. Walking. This wasn’t a sight he got to see everyday.. Nor had he seen such a thing in his entire life for that matter.

“Slow it down, you buffoon!” The same voice shouts from inside the house. “Okay, just stop. Stop, stop, stop!”

On command, the house lowers itself to the ground with the legs being tucked away underneath just as a cat would when it’s getting comfortable.

He watches on in silence as a short figure exits through the front door of the house. “Waah! Finally, a breath of fresh air!” The person stretches their arms above their head and bends backwards slightly.

This person.. What are they doing here? Wait.. Upon closer inspection, he could very well see that they were not a fae. In fact, they had human ears and their aura alone could verify that.

His jaw clenches at the dreaded thought of confronting yet another enemy. He must erase them or—

“Hm?” Before he could realize that he wasn’t even hiding, the human is now staring at him with curiosity in their eyes. “Hey, what are you doing out there?” They shout from their house. The light from the house emits a warm glow that faintly traces their outline.

“Why don’t you come here? It’s scary when it’s dark, you know?” They cup a hand over their mouth and wave the other, signaling for him to come. However, instead of doing just that, Lilia thinks it’s wise to just spare them for now and flee the field so he turns back around.

This does not slip past them as footsteps hurried to catch up to him. “Hey, hey! What are you doing?” They say and reach out to grab ahold of his shoulder, his bloodied shoulder. “You’re welcome in my house. And I promise I won't bite— oh!”

Lilia roughly shoves them out of instinct from the pain upon contact. He watches as realization hits them— that their hands are covered in blood. “Oh dear..! This is a call for concern..” Their brows furrow at the sight. They remain like that for a while then looks at him with focused eyes. “Please, come inside and let me treat you.”

—

“It’s not the strongest magic.. But this is my unique magic.” Before Lilia could realize, he was now sitting on a bed and being tended to. At first, he didn’t understand why he obeyed, but upon confession, it all made sense. “It can make people obey me, but it’s only limited to coming inside the house and— oh! I probably shouldn’t be telling you that, am I?” They laugh but that quickly dies down as he was not indulging in conversation.

They sat on a wooden stool that faces him and diligently wraps his right arm that connects to the first wound. Their eyelashes were long and from his perspective, it looked very alluring how it hides bits of their eyes.

“Ah! I haven’t introduced myself, have I?” They stop their movements and look at him with a beaming smile. “I’m [Name].”

***

You introduce yourself and hope that he, too, would do the same. But, he remains unfocused as something else brought his mind somewhere else. “Uhm.. Could I get your name?” You ask, careful of your words. This brought his attention back to you. A name exchange between two people on opposite sides of the war? Now that was something dangerous.

“Do you not know who I am?” Were the words he answered with, his crimson eyes boring into you. “U-Uhm.. Sorry, I don’t believe I do..” You sweatdrop. Was this guy important? You lived in isolation majority of the time and travel a lot so you couldn’t sit down and read the recent newspaper.

At the lack of an answer, he sighs and closes his eyes and rephrased his words, “Do you know what I am?” This made you actually look at him carefully. He is dressed— well, was, since you asked him to remove his clothing earlier— in all black and adorned in silver and badges. “Are you a soldier?” You ask.

He squinted his eyes and raised a brow. Were you this.. Oblivious? “I see you are not afraid of faes,” he says in a matter-of-fact tone. This time, you look at his ears since those were a very obvious trait for a fae. “O-oh.. I guess you are..” However, you still remain dumb to the situation and wonder where this is going.

“Well anyway, let me go get more bandages and after that, I’ll cook you something to eat.” You stood up from your seat and mumbled to yourself that was still very audible, “I didn’t think that your wounds would run all over..

“I’m sorry that I can’t heal you faster and properly.. I don’t often use magic..”

—

As promised, after you bandaged him up, you gave him food. He thought that would be it and he would be forced outside, but you surprised him by insisting he stays inside until he was well. Otherwise, you would just follow him.

Based on your appearance and behaviour, you were a normal civilian and had not a clue about the war that surrounded you. He rather not bring an innocent into this matter so he couldn’t have you following him into war. This was fine with him since he needed to rest and your house a perfect resting stop.

However, it was very much out in the open.. What if someone were to come? Be it fae or human, it would not end well.

He believes that he has gained a bit of his strength back so he sets up a barrier. It wasn’t so strong that it’ll prevent anyone from getting in if they so wish it— it just alters an outsider’s thoughts and makes them turn around. They also can’t see the house until they’re inside.

“You can sleep here.” You motioned to the recently changed sheets that he previously sat on and then moved towards a closet to take out a blanket. “I’ll go sleep on the couch and no refusing; you are my guest and an injured one at that.”

You gave him one last smile over your shoulder and prepared to turn the knob but he stops you, “Are you really unaware of the war?” He was vague unless you were informed of the current news. This peaks your interest and you turn your body to properly face him. “The war?”

“One with your kind and mine,” he answers and crosses his arms. You were now very much confused and it was clear to him as well with how your face warps to that of hard pondering. “Wasn’t that over seven years ago?”

He shook his head. “Your kind had taken advantage of the peace to attack the kingdom.” You bit your bottom lip and look down. You weren’t aware, but you were hugging the folded blanket a little too tightly.

“You really know nothing?” He asks once more. You closed your eyes and let out a deep sigh that you didn’t know you had been holding in and carefully put your thoughts into words, “I do not care what is happening.

“I am merely a travelling merchant but because of that, I rarely receive news.” You opened your eyes after speaking and smiled. “Frankly, I find that war is pointless and that it unnecessarily costs hundreds of lives.”

To you, you were just voicing your honest thoughts but to Lilia, it cause something in him to stir. He didn’t think that there was a human out there that had thought the things you do.

“A-anyway, I should let you rest..” Once again, you turn to open the door.

“Lilia..” Your ears barely heard it yet you glanced at him. “My name is Lilia Vanrouge.” This made you smile and turn to face him again.

“Nice to meet you, Lilia Vanrouge.”

~♡~

Should I make a part 2?

past lilia my beloved 💕

I’ve got so many thoughts on him in that era heuxdjzj I don’t wanna clog ur inbox tho 👉👈

-Jonah🐉

!?! What do you mean!? Who cares if you fill my inbox? I certainly don't. I mean, it's Lilia! I'm just down bad for him and I'm sure a great many are. I wanna talk about Lilia every waking second so please do share your thoughts! 😩❤️🤲

Dottore with short drabble “You only ever brought me pain and I’m sick of it.”

Something angsty pls? Thank you!

Tainted Glass [Dottore x Reader/Genshin Impact]

Synopsis: Can you escape the prison you made?

(A twisted Cinderella story. The girl was covered in cinders because she was fatally addicted to drowning in flames.)

Warnings: angst, emotional abuse, violence, death

(A/n): To be honest anon, I didn’t know what the word ‘drabble’ means until I googled it. I uh...hope you don’t mind the length :> 

-----------------------

You fell back against the cold hard floor with your arms bent and head turned sideways. The stinging pain spreads across your cheek. It burns. But your mind was still trying to register what had just came into fruition. 

Why?

The thought was so foreign somehow as if you could hardly believe he was doing this. But then the scene plays in your head again. You froze, your gaze enlarged and clueless while staring at the pale ground as it slowly begins to darken in the seeping movement of his menacing, haunting shadow. 

"Insolent woman, you wretch!" He spat in a disgusted tone, "How dare you speak to me in such demanding manner? Have I already told you, only talk when you have something important to say?"

You didn't respond, rather you merely let the strands fall in front of your vision as you gingerly pressed your hand against the place where he hit you. 

I…don't quite understand…

Dottore glowers down at your hunched form. He was never a man known for the virtue of patience. This man, the one who calls him your husband, you learned a long time ago to not meet his eyes as they would signal a hint of dominance amidst his authority, especially during moments like these. You came to feel his eyes instead, they were usually intense and full of wrath, sometimes crazed and curious while looking at his finest creations. He always loved experimenting in his labratory. After all, it was the only thing that could truly make the madman smile.

What is it that I'm missing? Where did I go wrong?

And you would do anything to obtain at least a fraction of the love he had left in his heart. 

He marches onward with heavy footsteps, paying no mind to your well-being, "Tch get out of my sight. I don't have the time to entertain with anymore these theatrics."

At the sound of him leaving you darted your attention towards him, "Wait, come back. Come back, " you plea softly, "Hector…" But he ignores your call. The back of your fiance disappears behind the door and slams it with a resounding thud. He was gone. You couldn't save him.

"No," As a result, you burried your face into your palms and cried.

“I'm sorry.”

…

What is love?

Being raised in one of the most prestigious bloodlines of Fontaine, a life filled with riches since your parents were well known scholars throughout Teyvat, they provided you and your family with everything you needed. From exquisite dishes to priceless jewelry, yet even among those riches you never did find an answer to your question. They were tangibles and short-lasting, eventually leaving you with nothing until the glass of your heart was filled empty. They seemed to have cared more about their fortune along with the brightest child of their family line, your brother, a male heir, someone who fulfilled their expectations where you couldn't do so. And because he was able to give them what they wanted, he was loved.

I see, love is conditional.

Realizing that you possessed no talent to achieve what your brother had accomplished, you came to accept that you were undeserving of their love. Love was for the smart. Love was for the gifted.  Love was for everything you are not. There was no place for your kind and thus you locked yourself up in your bedroom chambers along with your fragile heart where no one would try to find you, picking up the books upon the shelves and getting lost in their fantasies. 

They told you many beautiful things about the world and many reasons why it was so tragic. Because they weren't real. The story begins with a princess who was a kind-hearted soul, deprived from the care of her evil stepmother and dreams of marrying a prince from a land far far away. They often end on a happily ever after with the princes finding her one true love. You've never seen anything like it. Where two people, despite the struggles they went through, loved each other unconditionally.

Unconditional love only exists in dreams.

Or so you thought to believe.

One day a man marched right at the doorsteps of your mansion. He was a student coming all the way from Sumeru Academia and had high hopes of building a business partnership with your father. The man was declined of course, you watched from the garden bushes as he was sent off back into his carriage. He stops abruptly and turns his head ajar to catch your figure, his inquisitive eyes were both striking and sharp. Like thorns of a rose that was ready to prick anyone who dares to come close. Even so, they made a very lasting impression.

Red eyes.

It was the first time that someone had looked your way.

Couple of months later, the government had arranged a grand ball where all nobles would gather and commit to building their social circle. Useless events. There was no reason for you to engage. While your parents were occupied with the latest gossips and your brother surrounded by fathers who were eager to marry their daughters to him, you snuck outside to the balcony and hid away from the crowd. Quiet at last. And as things should be. The moon was your only friend because she was just like you; half empty. Maybe that was why you still had a glimmer of hope for the other half to be filled. 

Part white, you inquired, pristine and untainted. From far away it looked similar to snow. 

"My, how pleasantly surprising."

While the other part was stained with black cinders.

You glanced over your shoulder to see a man leaning against the pillar. His mint coloured bangs were slicked back in a trendy fashion, complimenting the white suit he adorned himself with. The golden chains hanging around his ebony boots dangled and clanged with each step he took forward until the light finally reveals his face.

"You seem familiar," you say while squinting your eyes, "Are you the person my father rejected back in February?"

He quirks one brow and you were afraid if you had offended him. But before you could utter an apology, the man splits his lips into a toothy grin and bursts out into a maniac-like laughter. He was completely insane, you thought to yourself. Though he paid no mind to your discomfort and continued to dwell in his amusement, "Hahaha straightforward, I like it! So what if I am? Is it a requirement to be a noble for me to simply have a chat?"

"And if I may ask why?"

"Hmmm, why?" The man reaches for the balcony and presses his back there. He threw his head backward before drilling his ruby gaze into yours, "I too am not fond of annoying crowds. Those snobbish fools thinking they're above everyone else just because they have a couple of mora when that is all they are worth. It's almost too hilarious for my own good."

You could tell there was disdain in his tone. Mainly towards your father who were one of the many unkind nobles of Fontaine and was only liked because of his success. Gripping your hands upon the stone railings, you looked down at the distant trees below while the wind rustled them apart, "I can't deny that," you say dissapointedly, "It's common for nobles not to associate with lower classes as it could potentially ruin their image. Though I may not have been there but I'm sure you had much to offer in terms of your brilliance, erm, Mister…?"

"Hector," Hector placed a palm on his chest with a polite bow following suit, "Hector Dufour-Lapointé. It is a pleasure to make you an acquaintance Lady (Y/n)."

"You know my name?"

"How could I not?" Hector smirks lazily as he danced around you, "I saw you before hiding behind the rose bushes back in your estate. Quite curious why you didn't attempt to say hello."

He even remembers that too. You fiddled with the fabric of your dress, "My apologies. I'm not use to socializing so much."

“Is that so? I think you're not giving yourself enough credit," he complimented while shrugging, "This is much more entertaining than hanging in that insufferably crowded room, it was an unexpected occurence to meet you here of all places. However, I must say time can fly if I'm able to enjoy myself."

You shifted away from his stare, "You flatter me. We've only been talking for a few minutes."

"I have yet to realize it then" Hector's cheerfulness remains at stance despite your gloomy response. He leans forward like a curious child and tosses you a question, "Then allow me to ask, what brings you out here Lady (Y/n)? I don't see any reason when your family are such highly respected people of Fontaine." 

"I'm not like them!" You retort instantly, causing the man to glance at you with skepticism, "I mean, I have nothing to do with them and they have nothing to do with me. That's just how it is. They already have Clement after all…"

Why am I telling him this?

"Ah your brother I assume. Yes so I've heard much about his genius mind. There were a few instances where he and I collaborated at Sumeru Academia," Hector speaks as if regarding to his unpleasant memories, "Although he never said anything about having a sister."

"We're not that close. And I'm not very fond of him," you confessed bluntly.

"Neither am I," Hector agreed with a scowl, "He claims his position using the knowledge derived from history books but never tries to think beyond the norm. That ignorant mindset of his will surely be his downfall one day."

"Ignorance can lead to anyone's downfall. If they turn a blind eye to the truth, so much can be taken from them," you paused shortly from rambling too much, "That's what I read in books at least."

"As expected of your lineage," he sighs whimsically, "Such avid readers."

"Well my family prefers documents and research. I've gone through them too but I will always love reading fiction."

"Ha! Seems you really are trying to be different from the rest of your family."

Seconds turn to minutes and minutes to hours, you had already forgotten about the cold breeze despite your dress being less than ideal for the outdoors. The man, although he can be a little to blathering at times, was more than what seemed to be on the surface. At first you thought of him as someone here to take advantage of your relations to your father but he seemed so sincere when listening to your stories, so eager while expressing his thoughts and even made you laugh a couple of times. You didn't realize that the clock had already struck twelve as the guests were preparing to leave but you just weren't ready to do the same.

"Until next time (Y/n)," he takes your fingers and pressed a kiss on top of them, though you were more struck by how he addressed you without honorifics, "I look forward to speaking with you again."

A warm smile graces your lips as you cursty, "Likewise Hector. Thank you for listening to me. I know I must have taken a long time."

Hector sneered but you already learned that it was simply his way of expressing amusement, "Hardly. I was thoroughly entertained."

When your parents found out about your meeting with him, they made it clear that you would never see him again. Hector Dufour-Lapointé is what he calls himself but the real name behind this man was Hector Valliere who came from a village hidden in the west of Fontaine. Rumours said that he was chased out of his hometown by an angry mob, claiming him to be a madman conducting unethical experiments on humans. Shortly after his arrival in Sumeru, he abandoned his past identity and replaced it with a new one in order to enter the academy under legal supervision. Associating with a man of a suspicious reputation would only cause harm to your family's name. Though you could barely care much about their reputation. There was nothing for you to benefit from it.

Few weeks have passed and you evetually gave up on the thought of hearing from Hector. They were only fleeting moments, nothing more. Your routine would stay the same as you kept on plucking more books off the shelves, killing whatever time you had. However the activities you used to enjoy somehow lost it's flair and there would be a slight pain in your chest whenever you turn to a page with the princess as she is surrounded by her friends. What exactly changed? Your family still treated you the same. Did you suddenly grow bored from doing the same thing everyday? Why is it that you feel much more lonelier despite being alone for so long? It was hard to tell in a singular perspective. If only there was someone here to give you some insights on things you couldn't see…

A silver bird lands by your front window and you nearly fell out of your chair as it flapped their wings violently. A machine?! They dropped what seems to be an envelope within the thick bushes before taking off and buzzing into the evening sky. You switched off the lock and lifted the glass within a single movement, snatching the piece of paper so that the wind wouldn't blow it away. Hastily you opened it. Both curious and cautious of why would anyone send you mail in such a discreet approach.

Chère Mademoiselle (Y/n),

I can only imagine the shock of your expression once reading this letter. I'm only writing to you since I assume that your father had already told you those nasty rumours about my past. No matter. I trust that you have a good head on your shoulders to not prejudge people using such miniscule details. I wish to speak with you again. Unless you have other plans staying in that stuffy room of yours, meet me behind the clock tower at 11:00 p.m. Don't be late.

Bien à vous,

H.

"It really is him!" The happiness spreads all across your features as you clutched the letter to your chest. For some reason, your heart wouldn't stop racing. It was a simple yet thoughful action on his part but despite how short his greeting was, every word held the weight of a thousand sparks, "I…I can't stop smiling."

And without hesitation, you prepared to leave. No one noticed your absence.

-------

It was only halfway where you realized that Hector didn't give many details redgarding why he planned this sudden event. You caught sight of him standing under the roofs with his hands hidden behind his back. He had on his signature lopsided grin, brows uneven as he glanced at you casually.

"How very punctual, were you so eager that you couldn't wait?" He teases.

"I was surprised when your bird knocked upon my window," you inform, "Is it something urgent?"

"Not at all. I merely wanted to catch up with old times," Hector tilts forward to emphasize his suggestion, "Care to indulge me for a bit?"

You crossed your arms, "Then what is it that you're hiding behind your back?"

"Hmm?" He hums, "You mean this?"

"Ah!"

Roses. A bouquet of bright red flowers were presented to you, nicely wrapped in fabric. In the language of Fontaine, recieving them could mean multiple of things and you couldn't help but feel hesitant despite his thoughtful gesture, "Why are you giving me this?"

"Is it so wrong for me to be a gentleman? I thought it would be best to prepare you a gift after you put all that effort to come out in such a late hour," Hector mused to himself, "Especially when you had to make sure no prying eyes would catch us."

You let out a small laugh before accepting the bouquet, "I wouldn't go as far to say that."

"Oh?" Although it was hard to see, Hector managed to catch a glimpse of your flushed cheeks hidden behind the flowers. A darken smirk climbs onto his face at the inviting thought of what it could mean, "Tell me more."

The whole night you both spent walking around the empty plaza with only the stars as your guide. They paved a silver path reflected in the horizon above, free flowing like one of the many watercolour paintings hung in your chambers, uncertain where they may lead but you followed them regardless. If it weren't for Hector's inivtation you might have never known about the parts of your city due to the restricted lifestyle you lived. He listened to every one of them. The stories you had to tell when there was no one for you to talk to and the complaints about your brother whenever he wanted to snitch on your actions just to get the praise out of your father. You expressed your frustrations when speaking about your incompetences, joy after reading a good fairytale book written by your favourite author, there was so much to say that you were worried if Hector soon grew tired from them.

"Go on. I'm listening."

And your heart flutters again. Suddenly everything felt so light with each step you took, it was as if you walked across the stars in the sky rather than the heavy pavement of the ground you called your home. But even if happiness was a bliss, it tormented you. Because companionship made you realize how poor your were all along. That you had everything yet you had nothing, slowly withering away like the roses you held in your hand. Convinced that your existence was worth nothing more than nothing itself. Doomed to be dismissed and forgotten. Rotting away...Hector stays by your side as you cried softly into the night.

From a distance the bell rings and echoes just like the time before during Fontaine's grand ball. Hector shows you a secret route so that no one could find you.

"Will you write to me again?"

The request was so innocent, purely from genuine intentions and devoided of anything he had in mind. Hector would always laugh in these situations when things have gone unexpectedly yet pleasingly his way but held back knowing that it would be foolish to waste such a priceless opportunity. And so he gave you his smile, one full of secrets where you had mistakened it as a promise, "Of course my dear."

Every night you could no longer fall asleep since he had occupied your thoughts completely. Sometimes you'd dream of him and their tales would unfold similarly to the ones you have read. It gone to the point where the maids would have to wake you up during late afternoons due to the dramatic change in your sleep schedule. Though, you didn't care what they did to you. As long as no one found out about your secret rendezvous.

You never thought that there'd be a day where you would voluntarily give up reading your beloved fairytales. They were now replaced by a stash of his letters that have been accumulated over the past few months. You read them each day, pacing back and forth within the walls of your room, whispering his sentences as if he were the one saying them to you. He made you feel special. You were addicted to this feeling. Eventually you managed to memorize his words by heart. 

The pages of your diary were filled with notes. Like your very own  fairytale carved into reality. From the rose petal, now dried, to the hairpin he snatched from a distracted merchant and a single strand of his hair you found within your cloak after a warm embrace, all of these items, a remnant of the man you loved were taped up in these pages. Sometimes you could even feel his prescence because it was all you needed. It didn't matter if Clement threw insults about how worthless your existence was, your parents could lock you in this prison if they wanted to but they shall never take away Hector from you. Never. You swear it. He was your whole world and the prince who saved you from a life made of aching emptiness. You would do anything to keep him by your side. Anything to gain his affection.

Anything.

"I had a feeling that you were the culprit dear sister."

Your arms stutters as they clutched tightly on the scrolls you took off from the shelves. The light crept into the room like arms reaching out to clutch around your ankles, warning you for trespassing. You turned around dreadfully to see Clement pressing his shoulder against the doorframe with his arms folded and a wicked expression aimed at your pitiful state.

"Why…Why are you still awake?" You say in disbelief, "I thought everyone was asleep."

"Please. Not only are you shameless but hypocritical as well. You truly are a dissapointment to our family."

"Wait," taking a step forward, you stopped him before he makes his exit, "I'll put them back. Just don't tell father about this."

But like your parents, your brother was unkind. Clement doubles over and hugs his torso, cackling through his teeth, "Is that how it is?" He swipes his arm up and you see a parchment paper held between his fingers. 

"No!"

"Ma chérie (Y/n). I must say all this tenacious effort of sneaking in my letters to your window is becoming more and more tiresome. But of course, you are an exception. I want the scrolls you've mentioned the other day at my lair tomorrow evening. Make sure no one discovers this. I'm counting on you. Cordialement! Hector."

"No…" you whispered, feeling the weight of the world fall upon your shoulders as it shattered apart. Hector. If possible, you hoped that the pieces could just crush you right then and there. Your knees felt weak and a fright takes over but despite your turmoil, Clement didn't show a shred of sympathy.

"So this is why you've been acting odd lately. Pathetic," he flaps the paper tauntingly in his grasp, "I can't decide if I should be impressed or baffled by your actions. A secret romance with a criminal and the bloodline of Fontaine's most respected government associates? Even though you've hit rock bottom, you still decided to dig deeper."

"Clement you don't understand!"  Stumbling upon your footsteps, you desperately tried to convey your predicament even if it meant feeding his ego, "Hector is not the man you think. He was shunned by the people of his hometown, treating him as if he were nothing. They…They ignored him! All this time he needed someone to recognize his brilliance, someone to understand." Shakily, you brought your tensed arms to your chest and screamed a silent whisper, "Someone to listen but no one did. He must have felt so alone…"

Clement flinches when you suddenly clutched onto his biceps. When he looked into your eyes, a shiver ran down his spine.

"Hector is counting on me. I'm the only one who can save him. No one else. He needs me Clement, he needs me!" 

"Tch."

An ear-splitting scream of his hand against your face echoes across the room. It knocked you out of your stance and you bumped into the table, grunting while the scrolls to tumbled to the floor.

"Crazy woman, I'm embarassed to be related to you!"

While you were still trying to regain your balance, your brother had already ran off. It wouldn't be long before he alerted your parents, the clock ticking away like sand until the final hour leaves you with nothing but an empty glass. 

"No," despair swallows the strength away from your legs and you crawled towards where he used to stand, "Don't take him away from me…I need him…"

I can't live without him.

I can't live without him.

I can't live without him.

Tears begin to form by the corners of your eyes as you clenched your teeth. This was no time to cry. Balling your fists, you sprinted out of the room, pushing whatever stood in your way as if you were running for your life. 

And if you considered everything else, it wasn't that far from the truth.

-------

"Hector! Hector are you there?" After arriving upon his house, you began knocking on his door aggressively. The lock clicks and you were greeted by an evidently annoyed man gnawing his teeth together.

"Tsk. There better be a good reason-"

"They're coming for us! We have to go. Now. Before it's too late. My father is probably already waking and making arrangements for you to-"

"Enough, I can't even catch what you're saying," He pinches the bridge of his nose while you were still stuck in a frenzy state. He takes a step back and opens the door wider, gesturing for you to come inside, "Get in already. I have a feeling that this will be a long night."

Hector observes intently at the words you tell him.

Not out of concern but akin to the way he watches the insects react when he exposes them to a different environment.

He was a scientist after all. A madman in which you deliberately fell in love with, so much to the point that he was able to feel pity for once. How you trusted him wholeheartedly with all of your vulnerabilities, emotions and secrets like handing him your parts just so he could put you back together again. Tinkering was always one of his favourite hobbies and he couldn't help but feel a twisted sense of pride at the thought of you being completely wrapped around his finger. 

Perhaps that was the reason why he loved you. Because he didn't love you. He loved you in parts.

"It was only a matter of time," Hector sighs. He sneaks his grasp into yours, knowing how much it affects you and puts on an invisible mask of deciet, "I already knew this day would happen long before anyone could have predicted it."

"You did?" With worried eyes you gazed at him, "What shall we do then?"

Knowing he hit the target, his lips begin to curl up towards his ears, showing his sharp white teeth that shone against the dim-litted room. Hector asks, "Do you love me?"

A silly question. You didn't hesitate to answer, "Of course I do. I've said it many times."

"Prove it to me," Forcing his forehead against yours, Hector commands in a dangerously low tone, "Kill your brother and only then you can truly be mine."

Your brain sutters, trying to absorb what he had just said. Kill? As in to take a life? It sounded wrong. But...was it wrong if the life belonged to someone who ruined yours?

Dumbfoundedly, you glanced into the bloody orbs of your lover, his black pupils thinning into knives while burning in the hellfire of his true colours. Hector runs a hand from the scalp of your hair, down to your cheek before gingerly sliding his fingers at your jawline. He pulled you close and whispered into your ear.

"Are you scared?"

Ah, this wasn't about your feelings. This was about him and your future and there could be no future you without him by your side.

You let your eyelids drop and leaned into his touch, "I could never be scared of you Hector. Whether it is within my power or not, I will make sure no one gets in our way. I swear it."

"Good," he continues to have you feed on his affection, "I knew I could count on you."

-----------

The news of your brother's death filled every headline Fontain had to offer. He was driven off a cliff while making a trip towards Sumeru. No one survived. The remains were so crushed to the point that authorities had trouble identifying their bodies. The only explanation they could come up with by observing the leftover tracks was that the horse must have gone out of control and ended up dragging the carriage along with it.

Ha. Serves him right.

Food poisoning. The vial Hector made was very effective. You made sure to bury it away from your mansion.

With no other choice, you became your family's next heir. Hector notifies you that he would be away for several months to solidify a unique connection with a man hailing from Snezhnaya. You didn't think he would arrive at your doorsteps with so much authority. Fatui soldiers followed from behind as the staff paved a way for them to enter. Your father was clearly displeased by his outrageous approach but he knew he was in no place to deny.

"Upon the agreement between Fontaine and Snezhnaya, Lady (Y/n) will become Harbinger Il Dottore's wife," the Duke announces, "This news will be publicly announced at the end of October."

Dottore? Is that what he calls himself?

As if claiming his victory, Dottore shoots your father a devilish smile. You could feel the dining table shake when he kept pressing his fist against the smooth surface, begrudingly congratulating you both for the new engagement. Your mother bursted into tears.

Was it worth it?

You watched both of your parents mourn silently in their own manner. Perfectly knowing that you were the main cause. But you weren't able to feel any sadness because in the end, you now had everything you've ever wanted. 

The inheritance.

Their attention.

But most of all, him.

And when you were convinced that this was your happily ever after, that fairytales were not just beautiful lies for the sake of comfort, you didn't realize  you were already living a life made of beautiful lies conjured by your own mind for the sake of your own comfort. 

"You're nothing without me."

Dried and calloused hands squeezed around your throat as you flailed your legs against the soft fabric of the carpet floor. He encases you in a straddling position, enjoying the sight of your tortured and clenched face. Hector…no, Dottore hated it when you disobeyed him. He despised it when his creations don't work the way he wanted them to and he had no use for things that are broken.

"G-hka--k..-"

"How many times do I have to remind you to not use my birthname. Do those ears of you even function properly? Or must I fix them myself?"

You gasped for air when he relaxed his grip. Vision a blur, you coughed a few times before he pulls your arm so that you lay flushed against his chest.

"Don't forget who saved you dear (Y/n). Because of me you were able to escape that miserable life you've despised for years. I expect the utmost gratitude on your part at all times, it is only fair that I punish you for not meeting my requirements, don't you agree?" Dottore lifts his hand up to pinch your cheeks, pulling your head to stare at your eyes, "After all, there is no one else in this world who can put up with you…but me."

His words were poison in which you drank like a woman starved. It made you feel numb to the pain the more you drowned in their alluring scent, the taste was sweet, a remedy for the bitterness of reality where the man of your dreams was nothing but a cruel monster. You came to believe that the reason why he treated you so harshly was because he was scared of losing you. You were caught in the trap of what seemed to be love and devotion when truly, you were just a toy to be used at a means end. He breaks you and he puts you back together, over and over again, filling in between the cracks formed in your glass heart with the phrases you loved to hear. Just like how he filled the other holes of your life where no one else did. You called it kindness. He saw it as entertainment.

Most people pay attention to the flower's beauty but they never acknowledge the thorns hidden beneath it's blossom.  That is why they bleed. They get hurt. Though, you didn't mind shedding blood if it was for his sake.

Because you would do anything for him.

You would do anything to bring back the memories of Hector Dufour-Lapointé and save him from the Harbinger that ruined his life. Your life. It wasn't his fault. You knew you could change him to what he was before because you were in love with him, that he might still in there. Somewhere.

Right?

…

Please come back.

Time continues to flow like the tears of your dying heart despite yearning for it to turn at the past. Dottore already left the room a long time ago but you didn't. Raising your head away from your hands, you peered at the door in front of you, begging desperately through a chanting record of despondence. 

Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back.

Images, they slipped through your fingers, slowly becoming more distant until your mind began to see them as illusions. Dreams. Things that were not real. Telling you that your life was a lie. 

"Come back to me…Hector."

Because the man you loved was withering in your memories and you couldn't do anything to save him.

A dry croak robbed you of your breath as you turned to look in the mirror.

Worthless. You were always worthless, it was what your parents told you since birth. It was what you became when he wasn't at your side because without him, your existence was worthless. You lied for him, you stole for him you, took a life for him. You destroyed yourself for him to point that it was hard to believe you were even looking at yourself.

Worthless. It's who I am.

And despite it all, you couldn't obtain his love.

(Crack).

Worthless things don’t deserved to be loved.

(Crack. Crack).

But what if it’s because I’m worthless, that he won’t love me back?

(Crack).

Your eyes jolted open, causing you to gasp sharply. When the sweet lies dispersed in your head and cleansed you of deceit, everything started to make sene. You came to realize why your wish was impossible all along.

Dottore...no, Hector, the reason wasn't because he didn't return your feelings. Neither was it due to the fact that he hurt you through his actions. Nor when he made you cry or scream for help before feeding you with more lies, thinking he would never hurt you again. It was none of those things.

It was because the man you loved this whole time was someone who could love no one but himself.

"Ha...haha," sucking in your breath, a sinister laugh escapes your mouth, "Hahahahahahaha.....!"

Everything was worthless.

You grabbed a nearby hairbrush and threw it at the mirror, watching yourself shatter into a million pieces.

There was only one thing left to do. 

------

"Ugh, where is it?!"

It was late into the night where every staff had gone to sleep. The Harbinger fumbles with his keys while standing at the door of his basement as he was too busy proceeding with his research rather than considering the thought of rest. Usually he acted upon them on his own will, performing various experiments for enjoyment. However, ever since the Snezhnayan court had requested him to look into the ancient arts of alchemy, Dottore was forced to carry it out before the deadline approached. Otherwise his position as Harbinger would be revoked.

"What a bunch of self-centered blockheads. Can't they understand that it take quality time to get quality results?"

Most of his important documents were stored on the otherside. Half of it came from his father-in-law's library. He had you to thank for that.

"Ah finally," he mutters, though still dissatisfied, "I should have a word with my butler for misplacing them."

Dottore shoves the key into the lock but instead of twisting the knob he noticed something strange. It was old and had yet to be fixed but somehow he didn't have any trouble adjusting his wrist. Then he saw there were a set of freshly made fingerprints upon the smooth metallic surface. However, the only person awake at this time would be him-

An intruder!

Dottore drops everything to the ground and yanks the door open. He skittered down the stone stairs while cursing under his breath. Using the delusion gifted by the Tsaritsa, the Harbinger activated his lazer-like pillars as he took advantage of their glow to light up the unlit room.

"What in the abyss...?!"

Except it wasn't dark.

"All of these scrolls, I recognize them," without sparing a single glance, you spoke nostalgically towards the bookshelves, "It brings me so much memories..."

Dottore clenches his teeth together as his eyes shone an angry red, you were holding a torch dangerously close to his hard-earned collection, "What do you think you're doing?!" He fumed, "Put that out, AT ONCE! Don't make me repeat myself!

"They're precious to you aren't they?" You finally shifted to face him, "More than me."

"What has gotten into you?" He was about to hurl at you until he saw your torch lowering, causing him to retreat. You were strangely noncholant and he couldn't help the feeling of disturbance. Accepting that he didn't have the upperhand, Dottore decided to use a different approach, "(Y/n)."

The sound of your name falls from his lips. You faltered.

"I'm sorry for what I have done. I know I was dishonourable to you, as your husband and lover, and that you didn't deserve to see me so aggressive. You have every right to express your anger, my dear. I was in the wrong."

It was only a mask. You knew it well. But seeing him with softened eyes and a tone so comforting, made you desperately wanting to run into his arms so he could wipe away your sorrows just like once upon a time. To live happily ever after.

Hector.

Dottore runs his fingers through his hairstrands in frustration and sighs, "However the Tsarista needed me to do something very important and I can't seem to fulfill her request no matter how hard I try. It angers me. If I don't finish this, there would be no place for us to stay."

"Hector..." you sniffled quietly. He looks so much like him right now.

"Can't you see I'm doing this for you?" He consoles, yet his weapons still remain, "I only intended to make you happy and there's nothing I won't do to achieve that. How about I show-"

"Enough."

Dottore froze upon your sudden command. He didn't sense a hint of subjugation and it seemed that you had perfect control of your emotions. How very inquisitive. Did you grow immune to the style of his voice? In such a short period of time? The facade he had on was now replaced with a growling animal-like expression. You looked at him dissapointedly. His Harbinger self returned. Hector was no more.

"Ha, you're the same as always. Even before the time you became a Harbinger. The same man that I fell in love with but it is me who will never be the same again," For a moment you averted your gaze as if trying hard to swallow your own words, "Remember when we first met at the balcony? That I told you my favourite books to read are fiction? I knew they weren't real but deep down, I wanted to believe in them anyways. And you know what? They did come true, to some degree..."

As the memories come flashing back, he defenselessly watches your expression contort from sadness to a calm contemplation and finally, enraged disgust, "But you only ever brought me pain and I'm sick of it!"

Swaying the torch to the side, Dottore flinches forward but he didn't dare to come close when your current state was unpredictable to him, "I JUST WANTED YOU TO LOVE ME," you wail, I just wanted to be loved, bringing a clawed hand against your forehead and trembling upon contact, "It's all that I ask for..."

Dottore narrowed his brows. Perhaps he may have gotten too far.

"But I know it's impossible. The world is a cruel place and there's no point in trying anymore. That is why I'm going to set us free."

"...What do you mean?"

You shut your eyes closed and tossed the flaming torch to the ground. A horrified expression takes over his features. It didn't take long for the fire to begin spreading amongst the room.

"NO!" Dottore yelled powerfully, he frantically darts his gaze at all directions as they continued to flicker and blend into his precious documents. You stood still and watched him grab the ones that were intact, savouring the most he could but they slip out of his arms every time he moved. Dottore glances behind him to see a rising cage of hellfire. Then he turns to you.

" 'Til death do us part!" you laughed maniacally.

The madman looked back with angry dismay, "You're out of your mind!"

Abandoning whatever he held in his hand, Dottore spins around towards the staircase. He covers his face with his sleeve and did whatever he could to prevent the fire from touching him. However, he accidentally stumbled on his footsteps and something fell off the heights, knocking him in the face. He grunts painfully.

"That will leave a scar," you smile while he clutches at his injury, "I can break you too.”

Just like how you broke me.

Knowing that you've managed to leave a mark of your existence on him in someway, you peacefully watched your lover wobble between the hell you created. But the hell you knew was not made of scorching heat and thundering flames. Hell was empty. Hell was a void. This feeling was far too gentle to be considered hell. If he can't return your love, then at least let these caging arms bask you in the warmth you’ve always desired.

Lifting your head, you looked towards the ceiling and closed your eyes.

Ah, this cannot be death.

Hello! I came from your Wattpad and I really enjoy your writing ^^ I hope you're taking breaks and that you're having a lovely day <3 How's Tumblr so far? What gave you inspiration to make a Tumblr account? :o

:O From Wattpad!? Hello, hello! ^♡^ It's really nice to know a reader from Wattpad actually came here (I thought they would just wait for the updates there). And I'm really happy that you enjoy my writing.

As for your questions, I am really enjoying Tumblr a lot, albeit it is not as simple as using Wattpad.

I actually made this Tumblr account years ago for a reason (or reasons) that I do not remember (it was probably when I was looking for NaLu stuff and for Undertaker oneshots). I've recently started to use it more because Wattpad doesn't really have a lot of Genshin oneshots.. But, I am also now using it to post my oneshots from Wattpad because of the current issue(?) with the app/site. I don't want my NSFW works to be gone for naught.