Toshiiiart - I Draw/write For Fun :)

I used to really love the first romance scene with Astarion (and I still do) but it hits so much harder after you know why he's doing it. That he's purposefully seducing you for protection and blood, that he's forcing himself to sleep with you, and this is a mask he's wearing.

It's a sexy scene and really feeds into the vampy (pun intended) jump-your-bones version of him you get at the start of the game. The whole thing starts out with him being so confident and suave, saying that he's wanted you ever since he set eyes on you and how you want to be known and tasted. It's like everyone's perfect vampire romance novel.

He's laying out the bait that's worked thousands of times over and luring you in. And you can just get right to the kissing if you want.

But, you can also stop and ask him, "And what do you want?"

And for just a moment the mask drops. This is not the same cocky seductive face we've had up until now. This is vulnerability showing. When has anyone asked him what he wants? When has anyone cared? Does he even know the answer to that question?

So he pivots. The mask snaps back into place immediately. He turns back into the master seducer and feeds you a line about shared ecstasy to get you back on track.

And then comes what is, to me, the pivotal moment. He asks you "That's what you want, isn't it? To lose yourself in me?"

Looking at his body language he seems unsure at first, maybe questioning his previous tactics. Then he slightly cowers back, lowering himself as he asks the question. The total opposite of his confidence from earlier where he's standing with his arms out wide.

He's not sure what you want anymore. You're not playing by the rules he knows. Why haven't you taken the bait yet? Why haven't you thrown yourself at him?

And when you finally Nod in agreement, confirming you're here for sex?

This. This is the face he gives you. He just looks so damn sad. To me, it hearkens back to "Of course it'll turn me into a monster. What else did I expect?"

Whatever momentary blip made him question why you're there with him, he's just been reassured about both of your roles in this situation.

He sounds so quietly resigned when he answers: "I thought so."

And then the scene transitions into the actual act. I do like to think Astarion enjoyed himself as I'm sure the PC did, but it's hard for me to watch this scene now that I know his story and history without being uncomfortable.

Just that line "lose yourself in me" is so difficult to hear. Because on paper it's so sensual. Who wouldn't want a lover to feel that way about them? But knowing the context of what Astarion expects and believes in this moment is just... oof.

And to me, this is what makes this scene brilliant. The writing, voice acting, and the mocap/animation are all just SO GOOD. It's so delicately done and Astarion the character is so good at playing a role that you can completely gloss over the deeper stuff. But once the mask is eventually stripped away you can't help but see what was there the whole time.

And as we've established, being seen is a whole aspect of Astarion's romance arc.

I originally romanced Astarion for the same reasons I'm sure most did: he's a hot, sexy vampire elf (i.e. everything that's on the surface). But, I keep coming back to him over and over again for the person I know is waiting for me underneath the mask.

"THE GODDAMN LOOT GOBLIN DID IT AGAIN!!!" (Tom De Ville)

Congrats to Neil for getting the best performance award. Well deserved! 👏👏

That God damn vampire changed my life. He is now my official third braincell.

Dad Wyll vs uncle Astarion with the Ravengard adopted kids (please handle with care)

halsin armor refs for @chamomilewrites :3

i just think she’s neat

Should’ve went for the wizard instead

Apparently human blood has about the same amount of protein as the average protein shake. You just met Dracula at the local gym and he. is. absolutely. ripped.

my friend @vilemoonwitch just told me about the fact that gale is the only li who doesn't need to be persuaded to stay with the protag or just leave them outright if they chose to become a mind flayer in order to defeat the absolute.

in fact, very little changes for him. he still proposes, he still wishes to take the protag to waterdeep:

you'd really wish to marry me, in my present condition?

and all he says is, "your 'present condition' is that you're the one i love. and your current form is merely a reflection of the depths of your sacrifice. it only makes me love you more."

the love and devotion gale has for the protag are something else entirely.

i made a self indulgent astarion/tav comic because theres no option to comfort hug him every night

i put it on twitter might as well throw this here too

set after raiding cazador's palace

My brain is so big