The Weather Finally Warmed Up, So I Get To Do Chalk Art Again :)

Buff Lawrence lives rent free in my head.

I need something to happen like he falls into a fountain or a fellow cardinal gets hurt and Lawrence takes off his shirt to staunch the bleeding, either way he takes off his shirt in front of everyone especially Vincent and the press.

I need Twitter to freak out and stan accounts about the hot Cardinal with the six pack. I need Vincent to visibly short circuit on camera and for some mid-20s college grad Catholic guys to seriously contemplate their sexuality and the possibility of priesthood as a career path over investment banking. Those hot priest calendars in Rome have a new addition for the coming year.

I need American Conservative Alpha-male podcasts to be putting this 75 year old man as a the face of Red-pill content only for the Vatican to release a statement denouncing them. Thomas is somehow responsible for a large amount of men abandoning red-pill content.

Thomas is mortified and does not want to know anything that is going on while Aldo is ecstatic. Ray and Sabbadin, who both have a Twitter account are following this drama religiously. Tedesco posts a photo of when he and Thomas were younger in a “he isn’t gay, look at him helping me when I was the victim of a car bomb” and it’s Thomas carrying him bridal-style. (Vincent is very jealous)

I cannot write a full fic for the next two weeks due to my schedule so this is my contribution to the fandom. May you feast on what little I can offer 🍝.

imagine: you are chilling in front you your house getting high. along comes an old family friend who you last saw when you were six, you are now in your 50s. after a brief convo where he is kind of a dick to you, he’s like damn you’ve changed :/. and your like yeah bestie it’s been five decades why the fuck are you here. he leaves. later that night a shit ton of people show up and trash your house. just throw and absolute rager. halfway through the family friend from earlier shows up. he announces in full earshot of everyone that he wants you to come with him to rob a bank. you of course say wtf??? one of the people who broke into your house calls you a pussy. another person shoves you a contract which declares if you get shot robbing the bank they will not pay for your funeral. you pass out. when you wake up you find the contract on your table and your house almost completely back to normal. you stare at the contract for a moment and decide, fuck it this is just as a good a midlife crisis than anything.

this is what happened to bilbo baggins

Expectations.

Hearing Vincent Benitez say “I am what God made me” felt like what hearing Born This Way by Lady Gaga for the first time should’ve felt like

UH OH!

Monty would be the feral uncle

happy pride to them. and only them.

I think Pope Leo XIV should establish dominance by inviting JD Vance to the Vatican and killing him

I need him

Venom: The Last Dance (2024) dir. Kelly Marcel