Jenny Slate, Stage Fright (2019)

I think Tabula Rasa is a good episode based purely on the confirmation that if Zelenka lost all his memory and sense of propriety he would simply turn into a feral little man, no questions asked

welcome to Horror Podcasts, we have green eyes, purple eyes, red eyes, and yellow eyes

Messaging people for the first time is so hard. What am I supposed to say? Like, "You seem really odd and your blog intrigues me. Do you want to have philosophical conversations or perhaps talk about fictional characters?" What! Whatever. I will just follow you back and stare at your blog with my big beautiful brown eyes.

High school be like:

dude: *draws on girl who sits next to him*

girl: *gets mad, punches the dude*

dude: *is to manly to let it end there, punches her back*

girl: *is too much of a feminist to let him win, punches back while cursing*

other dude, behind the two: *stops throwing his neighbours pens at the trashcan, starts throwing them at the two in front*

dude who doesn't have any pens anymore: *wakes up, gets mad at pen throwing dude*

other girl: *genuinely tries to ask a question despite the fistfight between the first dude and girl next to her*

teacher: *on the verge of walking out the door/window and or a mental breakdown*

the rest of the class: *chanting the names of the people involved*

Rewatching SGA has taught me two things about Todd:

1. He's really good at getting imprisoned and

2. he's really bad at keeping a Hive ship in one piece.

they took to it like a duck to water: they began naturally, almost effortlessly, and were immediately in their element

they took to it like a baby otter to water: screaming, certain they were dying, hating every minute of it despite being perfectly suited to the conditions

Dream of the Endless has a singular braincell at all times and that braincell is petty. Every once in a while it perfectly aligns with the inside of his head like the dvd menu logo hitting a corner and that’s when he has moments of humanity

Mostly he’s a dick who needs to be smacked with a baguette tho

tfota be like:

enemies, to rivals, to held at knifepoint, to captor/hostage, to allies, to enemies, to lovers, to amiable work associates, to in a long-distance relationship where you are neither explicitly nor epistolarily involved with one another due to one of you being held at the bottom of the ocean against your will, to husband and wife, to EXILED, to in a long-distance relationship neither explicitly nor epistolarily involved due to one of you being completely unaware that your exile was a joke and the other of you having a treacherous letter-burning mother, to enemies, to "what letters??", to "jude nO!", to being in a long-distance relationship where one of you is captured by your murdering treasonous father and the other of you comes to save you but you kick him in the balls by accident because you thought he was a common ruffian, to uncommon ruffians, to being mistaken for a spy and shot, to falling from the ceiling onto your husband’s dinner party, to "that's my wIFE!", to slapper/slapee, to wanting to make her scream, to friends, to lovers, to making her scream, to snake, to chopping off his head, to hugging, to High King and High Queen of Elfhame, to family and Faerieland and pizza and stories and new beginnings and scheming great schemes :')