Miller Yawning, Circa 1973

he just like me after work... the big boob

I need to draw I need to draw I NEED TO DRAWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

she res on my urrection till i come. (back. (from the dead))

this one was supposed to be better but i give up. might retry later, he doesn't even look angry enough(9

my favourite mgsv fan service moment, worthy of beating the final boss

i heard you have to draw from imagination to learn to draw from imagination so here's miller on a beach. i adjusted his pelvis and head many times and still haven't got it right, and i didn't even really try to make the light direction convincing. but this looks much less stiff and cardboard than my previous attempts so i am glad it is what it is

a raiden i drew a long time ago before playing any metal gears

have read "the sun also rises"/"fiesta" by hemingway. review below

i'd say it is a slice of life about bohemian american expats in paris with lots of casual conversations and description of their leisure, with a side of nature and bullfighting. although not explicitly stated by the narrator/main character, upon closer inspection the book is focused on how the virility (no pun intended, i can't think of a better word) of young men (and possibly women) was broken by ww1 despite wars being supposed to be both outlet and forge of virtue and merit.

i haven't read a lot of hemingway and not big on reading in general, but the intentional omitting of things makes it really good as well as suits the tendency of many characters to avoid thinking about some things. there are a lot of diverse and believable characters, both recurring and mentioned only once. their friendly chat and banter reminded me of philip k dick's "a scanner darkly" in some way. besides war, it depicts issues of living in immigration, loneliness and alienation in a city, scepticism, insecurity, discrimination, feeling emasculated and toxic polycules.

it also has an interesting depiction of a female character's life values but that is up to women to comment. although she also admits to feeling miserable most of the time, it seems she is better adjusted than most of the male characters.

it is sad that 100 hundred years later it is relevant (not talking for everyone) but comforting that people in the past felt the same way. personally i am going to adopt ways of coping depicted in it, such as group trips, spending time outside the city and competitive games/sports. note that any character probably wasn't supposed to be a moral role model probably even at that time: befriend people of other genders for the sake of good friendship, don't blame your irritation with a person on their nationality etc.

cw for this book are mention of discrimination, slurs (i counted 3), animal abuse, a bit of gore, alcohol abuse, consequences of war and a weird open relationship where no one is really happy.

i would also say it might be relevant for trans guys with bottom dysphoria but (ending spoiler ahead) main character doesn't think much about it and eventually realises that it doesn't even matter bc he and his peers are messed up mentally and a healthy dick would not grant a happy relationship. which still might be relevant but i'm not sure if it's the message anyone would be looking for :)

i had a lot of fun first listening to it on youtube and then switching to a paper book, highly recommend it. reading the litcharts review was a bit irritating for me and more gendered than it could be, but provided an interesting insight on where stuff i thought to be just "default" comes from and reflect on my own (civilian) life.

the guy who is so cool (i have no idea who is he)

he's sooooo cool.

unrelated to drawing but i just did a really simple and easy calisthenics exercise (2 sets of 30 wall push-ups) for the first time in years and it feels so good. i am very grateful to the youtuber i follow describing ways to make any exercise harder or easier to make it accessible to more people. whoever might be reading this, i encourage you to take a short break from scrolling and exercise a bit to your ability, it is rewarding both long and short term