I Find My Body Pretty Only When I Sexualize Myself

Nope nope nope nope nope nope

Yes, we used to be friends

NO, I am not getting with you no matter what you threaten, D

What makes you think I'd let myself make a mistake like that again?

You can go dig yourself that hole, I'm done listening.

I know what I want, and it's NOT a fake angel who wants me to abandon my friends for her.

You can go fuck off now, D

I'm working to make myself better.

But that doesn't mean you need to make a bad decision.

Make the decision you truly want.

fighting for my will to live rn

on the upside I got more VA work and my grades are decent and my brothers are talking to me more

on the downside i ruined my relationship and friendships, i constantly feel like crying, i still haven't even had a chance to stop and process my recent trauma, and these fucking wings wont go away or stop hurting. At least last time they started hurting they were my normal ones. these ones feel different and idk if this is a new kintype or something since I have felt this before but I REALLY don't need this rn especially with everyone around me.

ugh maybe ill leave it up to a coinflip like the last hard decision i made

I don't need a coinflip actually I control my own fate

I finally finished cutting off everyone who made me worse. All of them. Including D.

My growth and progress will only be stronger now. I can prove it

NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO WHY NOW WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME NOW "I love you, and Im so sorry these horrible things keep happening to you."

WHY D WHY

I have a better relationship with my brother than I do with any of my real family.

I’m not using guardian angel as an insult, this isn’t about you right now.

someday, everything is going to turn out okay. you'll wake up with no blisters, no bruises, no scratches. you'll go about your day like normal, surrounded by people who care for you. you'll laugh and joke with them like you always have, and it will be easy to forget the hard times you had before.

it's all going to be okay.

stay safe.

thank you so much. there's so much going on that i don't even put in my blog but words like these make me feel cared about. I know there are people supporting me out there more then ever right now. Thank you for your kind words.

Why does it feel like with every relationship, romantic, platonic, whatever, they’ve always already got one foot out the door?

I cried today.

I cried in that very same spot.

You wouldn’t have been able to tell though.

Cried with my head in my hands.