just googled my symptoms and it turns out it was boris i missed, the whole impulsive mess of him: gloomy, reckless, hot-tempered, appallingly thoughtless. boris pale and pasty, with his shoplifted apples and his russian-language novels, gnawed-down fingernails and shoelaces dragging in the dust. boris - budding alcoholic, fluent curser in four languages - who snatched food from my plate when he felt like it and nodded off drunk on the floor, face red like he’d been slapped.
new game plan called shield yourself at all times and never let anyone in . this will have no repercussions
A girl puts a knife to your throat and your immediate instinct is to kiss her. Melissa, you relatable bitch. Congrats on living the dream.
donna tartt really said "being queer is like having something very precious and very rare and beautiful and life giving and the only real thing in a world of lies but you HAVE to keep hidden and a secret because it is a crime/morally wrong to have it/the world will fall apart beneath my feet if people find out/it will harm people I love if it comes to light/it is MINE and no one else's" and you expect me to be normal about her
Kim Addonizio, “The Singing”, Tell Me
pretending i dont care about requited love so it’ll happen to me sooner
can someone invent a type of letting go that actually feels good instead of feeling like your soul is getting ripped out via large intestine
december will make you go insane if the passage of time is something that scares you