JJ: There’s Nothing Gays Hate More Than Being Treated Like Women, Okay? We Don’t Want To Go To Your

JJ: is there a cactus where your heart should be?

Kiara: what’s up your ass this morning?

Pope, walking into the room and kissing JJ’s cheek: hey

Kiara: hm. Nevermind.

John b: *chokes*

Pope: What do you think butterflies taste like?

JJ: They taste bad

Pope:

Pope: How-

JJ: I answered your question, that's all you get!

Pope: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.


JJ: Oh. We're going out?


Pope: Wh...

Everyone at DisneyLand Pt2

JJ: Cooper, sweetie, don't pull

Heyward: Cooper, heel!

Pope, *rolling his eyes* dad.

Heyward: if I had known you guys were gonna do this, I would have brought Stella

Pope: it was JJ's idea

JJ: so much for the united front. I'll have you know despite all your jokes, Cooper enjoys it

Cooper: Woof! Woof!

JJ: Okay, sweetie, not helping.

JJ AFTER THE DUCKLINGS IMPRINT ON POPE

Pope, walking into the kitchen with ducklings following him: honey, I don’t want to go to this Titans dinner anymore than you do, but we’re going to be late.

Pope: JJ. JJ. JJ!

JJ, on the phone: Heyward.

Pope: what is going on?

JJ: I’m trying to pay Lily’s impound fee, but this automated phone system doesn’t understand anything I’m saying. Hey-ward. Hey-ward. Yes! No! No! Not JB Heyward. We went over my first name for 20 minutes!

JJ, walking around the kitchen with the phone: JJ! JJ! JJ!

Pope, looking up from his watch: what the-

JJ, the ducks following after him: JJ!

JJ: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Pope: Okay.

JJ: And make out during the scary parts.

Pope: Th-

Pope: The scary parts.

Pope: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

JJ: ..yeah

JJ: *talking to Kiara and Pope and sways on his feet* woah

Pope: *freaks out* JJ love, are you alright?

Kiara: *ready to beat some bitch up if JJ is hurt* what's wrong what happened?

JJ: *thinks back to everything he's done* oh i haven't eaten today that might be why-

Pope and Kiara: JJ MAYBANK

Pope : I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.

JJ: Wow. They sound stupid.

Pope : But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense.

JJ: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!”

Pope : I guess you’re right. Hey JJ, I love you.

JJ: See! Just say that!

Pope : Holy fucking shit.

JJ: If that flies over their head then, sorry Pope , but they're too dumb for you.

Pope : JJ.

Pope, struggling to keep upright in his 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don't really think heels are for me

JJ, pointing at him and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.

JJ: [banging his phone on the table in anger]

Pope: Hey, don't be mean to the phone- how would you like it if I banged You on the table, hmm?

JJ, eyes wide

Pope

JJ: yes ple-

Pope: DONT ANSWER THAT