Adam + Running His Hand Through His Hair (requested By @nerdyfactsheartbroken)

Prompt List of Sarcasm

“Well, what can I say? I’m a badass.” 

“Define normal.” 

“Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?” 

“Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English.” 

“Don’t look for any redeeming qualities. I don’t have any.” 

“It’s amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm.” 

“I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.” 

“And you wonder why you’re still single.” 

“Remind me to kill you. Please.” 

“I’m listening to you. I’m just not paying attention.” 

“That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?” 

“Were you dropped on your head?” 

“She’s crazy. And just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, there’s a crazy underground garage.” 

“She may seem like lollipops and rainbows but I bet behind close doors she’s latex and whips.” 

“If my day gets any worse, I’m asking hell if they’re having an exchange program.” 

“Sorry. I don’t speak skank.” 

“If I survive, can I go home?” 

“My middle finger salutes you.” 

“This is a whole new level of moronic, even for you.” 

“I don’t think I could ever stab someone. I mean, let’s be honest. I can barely get the straw in the Capri Sun.” 

“I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.” 

“Insanity run in my family. It practically gallops.” 

“Oh darling. Go buy a brain.” 

“Somebody’s cranky.” “Somebody needs to shut up.” 

“Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” 

“All due respect, but that’s a bunch of crap.” 

“I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.” 

“Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.” 

“What did I tell you about calling her/him the devil?” “That it’s offensive to the devil?” 

“I heard that!” “You were supposed to!” 

“I need therapy after this.” 

“You didn’t get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly.” 

“I’m not weird. I am limited edition.” 

“I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.” 

“I think you’re weird.” “I think you’re boring.” 

“If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur.” 

“You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?” 

“I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…” “A dangerous pastime.” 

“I’d explain it to you, but you’re brain would explode.” 

“Wow, there’s a big surprise. I think I’m going to have a heart attack and die from surprise.” 

“I’m gonna hit you so hard, it’ll make you ancestors dizzy.” 

“Even when we were kids, I always kicked your ass!” 

“Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.” 

“You’re good. A monster pain in the ass… but you’re good.” 

“Well, excuse me, psychic wonder!” 

“The female of the species is more deadly than the male.” 

“Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.” 

“She’s hot, but she’s evil.” 

“Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.” 

“I already know that I’m going to hell. At this point it’s really go big or go home.” 

“Go on, knock his teeth down his throat.” 

“You’re going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters, animal abusers and people who talk at the theater.” 

“What’s the point in screaming? No one’s listening anyway.” 

“I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m a damsel doing damage.” 

“So stick that in your juice box and suck it.” 

“Never take life seriously. No one ever comes out alive anyway.” 

“This place hold a lot of memories for me. Some bad, some… No. No, no, all bad.” 

“A little gasoline… blowtorch… no problem.” 

“Good, bad, I’m the one with the gun.” 

“I know you can’t kill anybody, ‘cause I can’t kill anybody.” 

“You’re insane, but you might also be brilliant.” 

“What you call insanity, I call inspiration.” 

“Sometimes I question my sanity. Occasionally it replies.” 

“Why should we date?” “Because we are attracted to each other.” “I am attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie.” 

“Why does everyone assume the worst of me.” “It saves time.” 

“I like you. You’re different.” 

“You successfully cured him/her of anything interesting about his/her personality.” 

“Neither one us is drunk enough for this conversation.” 

“You’re questioning my methods.” “I’m not questioning it, I’m saying it’s stupid.” 

“Wow, somebody needs a Happy Meal.” 

“I didn’t do it!” “Then why are you laughing?” “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.” 

“Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.” 

“You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.” 

“I care so little, I almost passed out.” 

“Well behaved woman rarely make history.” 

“You’re so weird.” “You have no idea.” 

“The universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got a hell of a sense of humor.” 

“You haven’t even seen my bad side yet.” 

“Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.” 

“How’s life treating you?” “Like I ran over it’s dog.” 

“Rule number one: don’t bother sucking up. I already hate you, that’s not going to change.” 

“Oh God, we’re not gonna have to hug or anything, are we.” 

“I’m so glad you could come.” “Cut the crap. Give me a drink.” 

“You make no sense to me.” “Welcome to my life.” 

“Have fun being deal.” “I will.” 

“Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.” 

“It’s called thinking. Go with it.” 

“I made a new friend today.” “Real or imaginary?” “Imaginary.” 

“Where have you been all my life?” “Hiding from you.” 

“I’m getting real bored and impatient. I don’t do bored and impatient.” 

“The girl is strange no question.” 

“Do us a favor… I know it’s difficult for you… but please, stay here, and try no to do anything… stupid.” 

“I know most people don’t like me; I don’t care, I don’t like most people.” 

“You are a very strange person.” “Well, thanks for noticing.” 

“I can tell that you think what you’re saying is funny, but… no.”

“I didn’t steal it. I permanently borrowed it.” 

“I’m not shy. I’m just examining my prey.” 

“If you pull out my earphones, I will pull out your lungs.”

“I don’t dislike you, I nothing you.” 

“Are you crying? No, I’m impersonating a fountain.” 

“Ah, he’s playing hard-to-get. That’s cute.” 

“You’re kinda anti-social, you know that?” 

“I feel like a freakin’ soccer mom.” 

“My advice is much more subtle. Stop being an ass.” 

“I’m just gonna pack up and go straight to hell now.” 

“My ex? Yeah, I’d still hit that. Except this time it would be with a car or baseball bat.” 

“She’s complicated like the DaVinci code, you know but harder to crack.” 

“And just like everything else we do around here, it’s about to get weirder.” 

“Such big evil in such a little thing.” 

“Why do I still like you, knowing you’re a total asshole?” 

“What does not kill you will likely try again.” 

“Oh honey, I would but… I don’t want to.” 

“And hello to you too… little homewrecker.” 

“I’m gonna make you wish you were dead.” 

“I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.” 

“What doesn’t kill me might make me kill you.”

“In another life, I think I was in a mental institution.” 

“I’m not crazy. I’m just interesting.” 

“Don’t make me pop your ten grand sand bags honey.” 

“This is fun.” “Seriously, we’re trying to hide a body.” 

Request [x] Masterlist [x]

I adore lwaboc, I really admire how well you handled their relationship going from 100% antagonistic to the killer ust and sweet pining. Any advice on how to write slow burns? I hope you're having a great day ♡

Thank you for the kind words, dear, I hope you’re having a great day as well. 🤗

Regarding your question— *clears throat* IT’S MY TIME TO SHINE. Here are a few things I’ve picked up over the years!

First, you have to decide what kind of slow burn you want to write. The most common one that I’ve seen is the physical slow burn wherein the characters realize that they’re attracted to each other but take a while to act on it. Then there’s the emotional slow burn wherein the characters have a physical relationship but don’t realize they love each other because they’re idiots. It can also be a combination of the two! You have to determine what’s best suited to your plot and your characters’ personalities.

No matter which option you go with, it’s important to remember that slow burn is all about building the dynamic. Have your characters get to know each other, squabble over differences in opinions, and ultimately learn to trust and respect each other. This is where you can take a cue from the real world— whenever people are willing to share, I love listening to their stories about how they came to be with their partner and how they eventually had the epiphany that this person was The One. Whirlwind romances do happen in real life, but I think the more common experience is an acquaintance blossoming into a friendship blossoming into something more. It can be really fun, as a writer, to try and track the different ways that can go, and drawing upon those experiences can enhance your story and make it resonate with your readership.

Slow burn is also about never taking the easy way out, lol. Don’t let them snog or confess their feelings at the first opportunity— you want to draw out that tension, stretch it tight until something has just got to snap. Don’t be afraid to throw complications in the way of the ship— hell, go ahead and keep them separated for ages if that’s what the plot requires. It’s an agonizing process but it will make the payoff so much sweeter in the end. But don’t go overboard with this, either. Throw your characters (and your readers and yourself, lbr) a bone from time to time. For physical slow burn: Let the OTP hug or nuzzle or forehead kiss or whatever in a rare unguarded moment, let them Catch A Whiff Of Each Other’s Scent, let them shiver from unexpected touches, let them daydream about how it would feel like to jump Person B. For emotional slow burn: Let each of them gradually come to realizations about the other person, let them amass this mental catalogue of their partner’s quirks that are just So Endearing, let them confess something that’s not quite “I love you” yet but is pretty damn close in a moment of abject vulnerability (”You make me feel safe,” “I miss you,” “You’re, uh, you’re not so bad,” etc.)

Tension is a huge aspect of slow burn and you’re going to want to convey that in exquisite detail during the crucial moments. This includes the characters’ immediate environment— how sound suddenly seems to be coming from a long way off, how the person’s presence seems to eclipse everything else in the room, how the air is charged with static in the space between their bodies. As for the characters themselves— who’s blushing? Who’s biting their lip? Whose hands are balling into fists or clutching that coffee mug a bit too tight? Whose pupils are dilated, who suddenly trailed off in the middle of a sentence because they forgot what they were going to say… and then, once you’ve finished setting the stage, you can either pull the rug out from under them with a cockblock ex machina or have them go at it, depending on where you are in the story.

That’s all I’ve got for now. I hope this helps. Best of luck with your writing!

Reylo Fic Rec: Of Penmanship and Discourse by @intp-slytherin97

This incredible fic just crossed 150K words, a monumental achievement, so I wanted to make a little something for it! In case you aren’t reading this fic already, you MUST. Definitely one of my favorite Reylo fics out there.

Read here on AO3

“Not marble nor the gilded monuments Of princes shall outlive this powerful rhyme, … So, till the Judgement that yourself arise, You live in this, and dwell in lovers’ eyes.”

– William Shakespeare, Sonnet 55

Atonement (2007) dir. Joe Wright // Lonely by Natalie Wee // “Holding hands” by Daniel Arsham, 2015 // Taking the Hands by Robert Bly // Pride and Prejudice (2005) dir. Joe Wright // Your Hands by Florence Ripley Mastin // Anna Karenina (2012) dir. Joe Wright // No Children by The Mountain Goats // Emma (2020) dir. Autumn de Wilde

Do you have any a/b/o verse reylo fics? Thanks xx

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I sure do.

I can’t imagine finding one of these that’s NOT explicit, but putting the warnings on anyways. Suggestions welcome! 

+ - fic is mature/explicit

* - fic is incomplete

Multichapter:

*+ Summer Heat by IshaRen

*+ House of Heat by PetraTodd

+Misbehaving For Days by t0bemadeofglass

+Unavoidable by Twin_Kitten

*+I Seek My Freedom in the Moonlight by asongforjonsa

*+Marked, Take Two by ChelleyPam

*+When it comes you cannot fight the heat by Pbabes_143

+Labyrinth - a Reylo Book Of Sins Re Write by RayofDawn

*+Downfall by Shakes116

+keep on getting closer by t0bemadeofglass

*+The Voice In My Head by Water_Fox (NightSiren)

*+the thick of it by bitterbones

*+The Ballad of You, Me, and Everything in Between by bluetoast

*+ Algorithms by greyorchids 

*+Beneath the Moon, I Saw You by Poaxath 

*+Winter’s Cage by Nelsbels

*+I Seek My Freedom in the Moonlight by asongforjonsa

*+Hunger by benperor-ren (winterelf86)

+Your Pretty Little Heart by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo)

*+Wolves by AlbaStarGazer

*+The Mating Service by AlbaStarGazer

*+Temperature by arroways

*+No One But You by faequeentitania

*+Baby, It’s Just Biology by Polkadotdotdot

*+Lie to Me by deadlikemoi

+i want to (wail at the moon like a cat in heat) by crossingwinter

*+How Little We Know by gopherbroke

*+I Will Possess Your Heart (If You Let Me) by raptorginger

*+Arm the Doors by Minkel23

*+Club Alpha by HisAngel910

*+A Tale of Tooth and Claw by Khawapashi

*+The Lycan in You and I by Reylogirlforever

*Speed and Heat by AMLark

*+Heartstring by Oh_Snapcrackle

*+Auribus Teneo Lupum by MalevolentReverie

*+Gap Year by way_of_the_pathfinder

*+Morut'yc Morut by CajunSpice714

*+can’t turn off what turns me on by audreyii_fic

*+Blow your smoke to fog up the mirror (Write our name in hearts) by reygrets

*+I will love you endlessly by crossingwinter

*+All She Ever Wanted by ToMakeMeDreamofYou

Oneshots:

+ By the Grace of Your Training I Will Not Be Seduced by Aiffe

+ Be Mine by kuresoto

+ You’re Hard to Resist (When You’re on Your Knees) by ViciousRhythm

+Swell by Hormonal_Trashbag

+Bite. by 2kitsune

+unexpected by thewayofthetrashcompactor (BriarLily)

+lust for life by kuresoto

+The Empress in Heat by Rhonda3Green

+Knot Me Up by Eskayrobot and Poaxath

But even that day, there on the porch, with  C h a r l e s  beside me and the smell of wood smoke in the air, it had the quality of a memory; there it was, before my eyes, and yet too beautiful to believe.

The Last Jedi Blooper Reel ft. a wild Oscar Isaac appearing

Rey doing the same reverse grip move as Kylo; presumably because she picked up his lightsaber fighting style through their bond (requested by anon).

take that ridiculous thing off

Elizaveta Boyarskaya, Viktoriya Isakova