画完了！是黑军团，为了卡杨那一格醋包了四盘饺子 ​​​

It’s a shiny rock, what’s not to like?

Please tell me your red hilt conspiracy theory. I know very little about the narrative surrounding the sword so I’m curious.

oh my god. okay okay i got into it like a few months ago and that post is so incomprehensible so this time i am going to attempt to not just rant like an insane person.

okay. lets go chronologically through le morte, my main source for this whole thing.

In Book 2 chapter 1, a damsel arrives at court challenging people to draw a sword from a scabbard. They fail and she continues on, meeting Balin on the road, who successfully draws her sword in chapter two, which is summarized thusly:

“Balin, arrayed like a poor knight, pulled out the sword, which afterward was the cause of his death.”

He refuses to return it to the maiden, who warns him that “ye are not wise to keep the sword from me, for ye shall slay with the sword the best friend that ye have, and the man that ye most love in the world, and the sword shall be your destruction.”

Soon, as she predicts, Balin, after doing a whoopsy daisy Dolourous Stroke, kills his brother Balan and is mortally wounded in the same battle. Merlin shows up, buries them both, switches the handle of Balins sword with a red handle, and says:

“there shall never man handle this sword but the best knight of the world, and that shall be Sir Launcelot or else Galahad his son, and Launcelot with this sword shall slay the man that in the world he loved best, that shall be Sir Gawaine“ (book 2 chapter xix)

Then he plunks the sword in a rock and sends it magically floating in the river. Cut to like thirty years later, the rock floats to Camelot, arriving at exactly the same time as Galahad. uh oh galahad!

In the vulgate grail quest, the knights find this rock, and it is first presented to Lancelot, who refuses to attempt to draw the sword. Arthur then asks Gawain, who also initially refuses, but is unable to deny Arthur when he gives him a direct command. Gawain reluctantly attempts to draw the sword and fails, whereupon Lancelot immediately gives him shit for it even though it wasn’t his fault--! he is warned that this will have dire consequences.

whatever. Then, because percival <3 percival tries it, specifically so gawain wont be embarassed at being the only one to fail. i love percival so much. he also fails though. then galahad tries it and succeeds. horay!

(this goes down much the same in le morte, and lancelot says: “My lord Sir Gawaine, said Sir Launcelot, now wit ye well this sword shall touch you so sore that ye shall will ye had never set your hand thereto for the best castle of this realm.” again, not his fault, but go off i guess lancelot)

except not horay. this is where the speculation starts in earnest but:

knights in the grail trio who die on the grail quest: galahad, percival

knights in the grail trio who dont die on the grail quest: bors

knights in the grail trio who touch the red hilted sword: galahad, percival

knights in the grail trio who dont touch it: bors

ya know??????

anyway so galahad dies and the sword gets passed to lancelot, who uses it to eventually deal a fatal blow to gawain, fulfilling both the prophecy of the sword and the doom gawain earned by attempting to draw it.

conclusion: sword bad. should have kept secace instead. fuck the sword with the red hilt all my homies hate the sword with the red hilt

His father's last gift

the transition from people needing each other to wanting each other is literally one of my greatest weaknesses that shit makes me want to walk into the sea and sit on the ocean floor for a thousand years

Magnus doodle

So this is the Ultramarine rental agency, we will find the right Ultramarine for you.

Have you heard that the Ultramarines are a bit flavourless and boring? Or have you tried one and was left unsatisfied, do not worry. Ultramarines comes in all shapes, colours and sizes. There is something for everyone here.

Do you like them a bit stupid but with a good heart? We got that. Or perhaps dashing and a bit reckless? We got that, too. Or do you like ‘em pretty as they come but a bit of a stickler for the rules, we got it.

Tell me what you like in a character and I will find you the perfect Ultramarine to suit your needs.

character misses their shot and the villain goes "ha! you missed." and the main character goes "did i?" and then shoots the villain again while they're frantically looking around the room for what the hero could possibly have aiming for instead

ummmmm thinking about VR LA and Maxim again guys . thinking about maxim overthinking and probably doing way too much internal self reflection in a very self deprecating kind of way and VR LA being . VR LA who is just completely oblivious to everything and genuinely believes he just likes maxim as a friend . and Maxim has been pining for the last like . 5 years . and is just like oh well I guess this is my life now . clearly I have been rejected because I have been so obvious (not really but it's incredibly obvious for maxim) and he has not responded . I will simply wallow in the corner for a while before accepting the fact that I am simply doomed to never be loved . at least he doesn't seem to be pushing me away and we can still be friends . how agonizing it is to have him so close but knowing he doesn't want me in return . but alas , better than not having him at all .

meanwhile VR LA is like omg yayyy I can't wait to go hang out with maxim my prettiest friend maxim <3 I'm so glad that me and maxim are such good friends ! it's kinda different from being best friends with dani and the crew for some reason idk... but he's just as important to me as them and I care about him a lot 😊 we are such good intellectual equals friends 😊

and then someone grabs VR LA and stares directly into his eyes and tells him explicitly that he's in love with Maxim and he's like O H H !!!! SHIT YOURE RIGHT- I GOTTA TELL HIM RIGHT NOW !!!!!!!

if it sucks hit da bricks <- litany against sunk cost

take it easy but take it <- litany against burnout/apathy cycle

fuck it we ball <- litany against perfectionism

now say something beautiful and true <- litany against irony poisoning

Here is a more lighthearted one: Either Sanguinius or Fulgrim is helping Magnus fix his tangled hair.

Venting time...

Doodle requests are open!