No I Think God Stays In Heaven To Be Smug & Comfortable & To Avoid Thinking About The Enormous List Of

my mom bought me challah from the bakery today and said "i got you some of your 'chaw-luh' bread :)"

Random linguistic worldbuilding: A language with six sets of pronouns, which are set by one's current state of existence. There's a separate pronoun for people who are alive, people who are dead, and potential future people who are yet to be born, and the ambiguous ones of "may or may not be alive or aleady dead", "may or may not have even been born yet", and the ultimate general/ambiguous all-covering one that covers all ambiguous states.

The culture has a specific defined term for that tragic span of time when a widow keeps accidentally referring to their spouse with living pronouns. New parents-to-be dropping the happy surprise news of a pregnancy by referring to their future child with the "is yet to be born" pronoun instead of a more ambiguous one and waiting for the "wait what did you just say?" reactions.

Someone jokingly referring to themselves with the dead person pronouns just to highlight how horrible their current hangover is. A notorious aspiring ladies' man who keeps trying to pursue women in their 20s despite of approaching middle age fails to notice the insult when someone asks him when he's planning to get married, and uses the pronoun that implies that his ideal future bride may not even be born yet.

A mother whose young adult child just moved away from home for the first time, who continues to dramatically refer to their child with "may or may not be already dead" until the aforementioned child replies to her on facebook like "ma stop telling people I'm dead" and having her respond with "well how could I possibly know that when you don't even write to us? >:,C"

A poodle clipped and dyed to resemble a pony.

You know the Grimm version of Snow White makes more sense than most versions if only because in that version Snow White was like 7 years old.

i'm a reform jew and i'm more religious now than i've ever been. I never grew up marking Tisha B'Av and probably didn't even know what it was. I can't remember if I fasted last year or not, but I'm going to fast this year. I am also going to refrain from cannabis for the day which I usually struggle with but I think if I'm doing it for am yisrael and hashem i will be able to.

Stuff my camp kids did during snack free time today from most to least expected.

1. Eat their snack (the primary thing they are expected to do)

2. Ships and sailors (normal camp game)

3. Big kids sang the National anthem in four part harmony while the little kids buried a tenth grader in leaves and grass. (I put these together because these events clearly were connected but I’m not sure how)

4. Held a “funeral” where the girl was resurrected by everyone singing “Love Story” over her dead body.

5. Turned on “fire ambiance eight hours” on somebody’s phone, buried the phone completely in sticks in the shape of a campfire, and roleplayed as monkeys/cavemen discovering fire for the first time.

The I Claudius fandom has like a total of three people, without counting me, and I love imagining what it would look like if suddenly this old book/series would get the popularity of GOT/HOTD or something like that.

So here are my theories:

Tiberius would have a fanbase and would be considered a “poor little meow meow”

People would make girlboss fancams for Livia

Messalina apologists

Herod would be the fandom bicycle

Herod/Castor would be one of the top 10 ships on AO3

Herod/Claudius would also be up there on the top 10 ships.

Some people would also ship Agripina/Tiberius and they would be deemed as problematic

Agripina/Germanicus Girlboss/Malewife

Edits of Antonia and her children to “I bet on losing dogs” and other Mitski songs

Fan casts for all book characters that didn't make it to the show.

YouTube compilations of “Caligula being a mood”, “Caligula being Caligula”, “Caligula being a menace”, etc.

I hate when Inst*gram inf*graphics or social justice posts say stuff like “this is NOT political, it’s a human rights issue!!!” Bestie, it IS political!! Human rights issues are almost always political! They have to do with politics. They have to do with politicians. The actions they require are political in nature. Something having a clear moral right and wrong does not equal it not being a political issue!