Ahhh Yes! That Ending Scene With Zack Was Fantastic, What A Range Of Emotions The First Time I Watched

Parallels #2

Both the pink ribbon Zack gives to Aerith and the flower Aerith gives to Cloud are gifts made in order to thank Aerith/Cloud for their help...

...and after Aerith/Cloud answer perplexed, Zack/Aerith offer it as a memento of their first encounter.

[Previous]

[Another post about Aerith's ribbon]

REBIRTH

okay I just had to back up a bit to verify it was you. How we feeling about Roche

My thoughts on Roche can be found summarized here

To not summarize them:

I love how stupidly consistent with the original he feels. I love Reno's comment in remake that all SOLDIERS are in fact, massive weirdos. I love how gay they let him be. I love that he quotes Romeo & Juliet. Except, in this universe, Loveless is the stand in for shakespeare and there's actually several shakespeare lines in the performance at the saucer. So there's like a 90% chance Roche was just quoting Loveless when he said that. I love that he put in the effort to hire a full brass band for his showdown in Junon. I love his stupid little keychain (yes I had it equipped for like half my playthrough)

Most of all I love that Cloud???? Weirdly respects him???? After their first duel, whenever Roche shows up, Cloud plays by the rules and tells all his allies to stand down so they can 1v1. He genuinely likes Roche and has this begrudging fondness for their random shonen rivalry. You don't see him giving Sephiroth any of that. Cloud has so many random people obsessed with him, and you know the only one he tolerates??? Roche. What the hell.

If we're talking about his final fight, let me just say: Ow.

No offense bro, but why are you always so protective of Cloud? No disrespect to you or anything but I've heard quite a bit of different opinions and theories on Cloud myself and I do agree with the people who say that he takes Tifa for granted. Going through trauma in the past is not really an excuse for his behavior. He also does act like he's the only one who has suffered in his life. Do you have other reason to defend him other than the fact that you "relate" to him? Just wondering.

Sorry for the late reply, my life has basically left no room for hobbies these past months. Your question is hard to reply to because I am not sure what you mean when you say I am protective of him. I guess you mean I defend his actions? Specifically in ACC? Firstly let me state that there is a difference between being a good character and being a nice character, there is also a difference between agreeing with someones actions, or just understanding them. Personally, I never really liked Cloud, especially not when I was younger. A lot of my defense of Cloud doesn't come from me personally liking him, but from me thinking he's a good character. I also think Snape is a good character, but I don't like his actions, and I don't defend them, although I still understand them to a certain degree. I should also say that as I started to understand Clouds character more, I also started liking HIM a bit more, although I still don't like the things he did, and would very likely not be friends with him. But I do understand why he did what he did and cannot be too critical of him because of that. You've probably heard that before you judge someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That's great advice, if you want to judge someone, you should imagine what it would be like to be them, however, I've noticed that too often when people try to walk a mile in someone elses shoes, they refuse to take their own shoes off first. They don't think "what would it be like to be him", they think "what would I do in that position". But Cloud is not you, and you cannot judge him by how you would act, you've not gone through the same things he has, your thought patterns aren't the same etc. This matters because too often I see people judging Clouds actions in ACC, and establishing his motivations by saying things that boil down to "If I were in his position, I would only do those actions if I loved Aerith/didn't love Tifa/whatever". But they're not Cloud, and they're not understanding how Cloud thinks, and that it's different from how THEY think. But like you said, I do see some recognizable elements of myself in Cloud, which is why I do understand his actions, and why I feel relatively certain in defending them, because I see them coming from a good place. It's common for me to react to things in a way that others find counter-intuitive. Let me give you an example, my brother once was mad at me because I had not told him my girlfriend of several years and I had broken up while I did tell a random stranger at the pub. He said that he felt like he wasn't important to me if I told a random stranger but not him. The truth was the exact opposite, I love my brother, and could not bear to face him for some reason, as I told him: "if not caring enough was the problem, then I wouldn't have told a random stranger". I see people exhibit that same lack of understanding when discussing Clouds actions, where they feel like his actions must be the sign of him just being a bad person, or not caring. But ask yourself what is more likely, that Square-enix wants their hero to be a bad person, or that you simply are misunderstanding the character? I understand why people don't get Cloud, Cloud suffers from obvious mental health issues, and mental health issues simply are not something that the general public understands, even today. Not only that, but Cloud went through the most insane series of traumatic events anyone could ever imagine. He had an alien parasite in him, saw his entire town murdered before his eyes, then saw Zack murdered in front of his eyes, then saw Aerith murdered in front of his eyes, and just when he started living a peaceful life he is forced to watch his child succumb to sickness in front of his eyes, and then he finds he himself is dying. All this on the psyche of a man who had had a fear of failure ever since he was a child, spent most of his life essentially in war, and had a severe identity crisis as well. Do you think you can honestly judge him by going "that's not what I would have done"? Would that not be incredibly

presumptuous? Have you suffered from depression as a result of severe post-war PTSD and a lifelong feeling of inadequacy combined with a fear of failure and the belief that many of your loved once died because you failed and were inadequate? Because that's the context in which you have to view Cloud when watching Advent Children. Saying "Going through trauma in the past is not really an excuse for his behavior" is just incredibly short-sighted, your behavior is determined by who you are, and who you are is determined by what you go through in the past. You can't expect a broken child to became a well-adjusted adult when being a well-adjusted adult is the result of having a normal childhood.

I also don't want to cause offense, but this really is a mindset you should change, because this mindset is one of the most pervasive and damaging ones in our society, it's the one that probably bothers me most when I hear it because it makes zero sense. It's like breaking a robots self-repair unit, and then being angry at it on the grounds that the self-repair unit should have fixed it. It's also very insensitive in general, it's the equivalent of saying "why are you depressed, just stop being depressed", people don't choose to be depressed, people don't choose to have a fear of failure. People don't choose their emotions, they're just there. They can be influenced by behavior over time, sure, but behavior is equally influenced by who you are and your emotions, which, as mentioned before, is determined for a large part by your past. People don't just "snap out of it". They fight and fight and fight, and sometimes they win and break out of the spiral, and sometimes they lose and it breaks them.

FFVII, and especially Advent children, is all about that struggle, and during those struggles you will have high-points, and low-points. FFVII shows all of those. It shows Cloud trying, it shows Cloud wanting, it shows Cloud failing, but it also, ultimately, shows Cloud prevailing. Judging Cloud for not breaking out of the spiral by the time of Advent children, when he was mentally only barely 18 years old, and when he started at the worst place anyone could ever imagine, is just not reasonable. It's the modern day equivalent of "let them eat cake", something that can only be said from the place of privilege of not knowing what the struggles of the people you're critiquing are actually like. So having that out of the way, lets look at Clouds actions from the perspective of Cloud. Cloud is a young boy, and he's in love with the girl next door, he wants to get her to notice him. One day said girl walks up a mountain and he follows, she falls off a bridge and ends in a coma. Cloud followed her because he's in love with her, and he gets the blame from the adults. Cloud internalizes this, and its important to imagine what this must be like for a child, to have the adults all tell him it's his fault that the person he loves ended up hurt. "your fault", "your fault". Afterwards Cloud starts thinking Tifa hates him and starts acting out. I think this is a good moment to point out btw that this child has no father figure. This is the start of his feelings of failure and inadequacy, he blames himself for not being able to protect Tifa, failure number 1, he thinks that if he were strong, he'd be able to protect her, he thinks that if he were like Sephiroth, then even Tifa would have to notice him. Now until this time Cloud is not an asshole, he's a bit of a rebellious kid yes, but notice that he's not a bad kid as much as he's a kid who wants to protect someone, has no direction, and is acting out. So Cloud thinks he's not good enough, but he leaves town confident that he'll become good enough, and even makes a promise to Tifa. All this follows logically from what we know about Cloud, and tells us a lot about how deeply seated these feelings are. Becoming Soldier wasn't a small thing, not some small passion project that he just came up with one day, it's the result of the things that happened in his childhood and he left everything behind make it so. He told the girl he loved, he promised, he boasted. And then he failed. Failure number 2. He comes back to Nibleheim and can't bear to look Tifa in the eye and admit that he couldn't do it, that he's a failure. His entire life so far has revolved around this and he wasn't good enough. So here we have Cloud, not in a great mindset, thinking he's a failure, and what happens? His entire town is murdered by the person he admired, someone he worked with. His Mother is killed, and Tifa, the girl he PROMISED to protect, gets slashed open so badly that apparently she needed to have her ribcage reinforced with metal. I think we can all agree that this by itself would be enough to potentially scar a person for life. (Cloud, not Tifa XD) So what's next for the boy who left town in order to become a hero? Well, he gets captured and experimented on for 4 years, during which his mind and sense of identity is bombarded with memories and knowledge of the lifestream in the form of mako, muddying up his thoughts. Cloud already had a weak sense of self as a result of his childhood, it's why he failed to enter Soldier and now this distaste for who he is makes him extra susceptible to Jenovas influence. The next thing Cloud sees, (he didn't consciously experience the 4 years of mind-fuckery) is his best friend getting killed trying to protect him, because Cloud wasn't strong enough. Failure #3. At this point, in Clouds mind the list of people dead because he could not protect them, because he's a failure, include his mother, his entire town, his best friend, and as far as he knows, the girl he loves. This is his life. His mind is broken, he hates himself, he doesn't want to be himself,

he has a mind-altering parasite inside of him trying to adjust his identity and Clouds just goes "I reject this reality and constitute my own". And why wouldn't he? Why wouldn't he want to live in a fantasy world where he wasn't a failure, where he made it into soldier, where he was cool and successful and not a disappointing failure? Zack tells him to be his living legacy and Cloud goes with it, then he runs into Tifa, Jenova adjusts Cloud further based on Tifas memories of them and rejoined with the girl for whom he joined Soldier Cloud is unconsciously all too willing to play the part. FFVII starts and it doesn't take long for the cracks in his fake persona to show, he meets Aerith, and becomes her bodyguard. He gets to be the hero he always wanted to be. But then, even as "Cloud strife, soldier first class", Cloud is still a failure, the plate still drops, killing thousands, he gives Sephiroth the black materia, he beats up Aerith, and ultimately, fails to save her as well. Tifa was the First Failure, and Aerith was the Final Failure. Even as a soldier, Cloud still couldn't save anyone, he loses even more faith in himself, he doesn't know who he is, he doesn't trust himself, and then when he also loses Tifas trust in who he is, he just breaks and gives over to Jenova/Sephiroth. Even Hojo calls him a failure. Cloud feels like a nobody. Now mentally weakened, under the influence of jenova cells, he gives Sephiroth the black materia AGAIN, and meteor is summoned. Another entry on the long list of moments Cloud can look back on in shame later on in life. He falls into the lifestream and again his psyche is under attack. We know what happens afterwards, Tifa finds him, cares for him, and saves him through his feelings for her. Cloud realizes who he is, realizes he's weak, and goes after Sephiroth without lying to himself. In the end he defeats Sephiroth mentally and is supposedly rid of his direct influence.

But that doesn't mean that this mentally 17 year old is now fine, we should remember these events when analyzing ACC. Cloud has been in constant fighting/war/peril ever since he left home as a child, and is now a traumatized 17 year old in a 21 year olds body. Novels and other materials give us an insight into how Cloud thinks during these times, and how he thinks about himself. We hear him say that he's going to live because that's the only way he can atone for his sins. He talks about wanting to change, and about believing he can change because he now has Tifa. He's a man (boy) who just exited war, and wants to be positive, but is still clearly blaming himself. We see that this initially goes well, we are told that Cloud experiences peace and happiness that he's never experienced before. We're also told about the things that make it go badly, when he has to deliver flowers to the ancient city for instance. While Cloud regained the sense of who he was the belief that he wasn't good enough, that he was a failure, was never solved, if anything it was put on hold until he got his memories back, and now he is forced to deal with it.

While he is no longer directly manipulated by Sephiroth he's still suffering from PTSD and, most notably, survivors guilt. He blames himself for the deaths of Zack and Aerith in particular, and starts visiting the church. Now most people might think it's natural to avoid places that make you feel bad about yourself, but that's not how a depressed person thinks, Cloud thinks he deserves to feel badly he WANTS to punish himself, he WANTS to feel bad. He's ashamed of the moments where he's carefree and laughing with Tifa. Why should he get to be happy when Aerith and Zack are dead because of him? He shouldn't be happy, he should be in pain, he should remember them, not doing so would be an insult to their memories, he must never forget how he failed them! That's how Cloud is thinking. We know of course that this is non-sense, Aerith and Zack wouldn't want this, if anything it's this mindset that is tarnishing the memories of Aerith and Zack, but that's not how a mentally unwell person thinks. Cloud wants to atone, and thinks he finds salvation in Denzel, whom he finds at Aeriths church. He thinks that by saving this life, he can, in some way, make up for all the death he caused. Tifa has a similar belief when she finds out Denzels parents died in the plate crash. And when Denzel joins the family, and Cloud has path towards redemption in his mind, things start getting better again. Because this is the cause of the problems Cloud is having in ACC. When Nojima says:

first off, there’s the premise that things won’t go well between Tifa and Cloud, and that even without Geostigma or Sephiroth this might be the same

This is the conflict he's talking about, he's not saying "Tifa and Cloud are incompatible, it has nothing to do with Sephiroth", he's saying "if Sephiroth didn't show up during Advent children, Cloud and Tifa would still be having problems because Cloud is going through survivors guilt."

But the good times don't last, Denzel has Geostigma and Cloud cannot find a cure, Denzel....is going to die. Cloud, has failed again. Not only that, but Cloud catches Geostigma....Cloud is going to die. And THIS is why Cloud leaves in Advent children. And you have to look at this as Cloud. Cloud said he was going to live to atone for his sins, but instead he's going to die. He won't atone for his sins, even worse, he's going to leave Tifa and Marlene behind. He failed again. He couldn't protect Denzel, he potentially brought an infectious disease into their house as well. Literally all Cloud can think about is that literally everything he's ever tried has ended in failure, everyone he's ever tried to protect, he's failed at. Do you understand how easy it would be for a person like this to fall into the trap of thinking "I deserve to die", "I don't want Tifa and Marlene to see me die", "Tifa and Marlene are better off without me anyway", "they'd be happier if I weren't here". Etc. Now we know this is nonsense, but come on, how many instances have you heard of depressed people genuinely believing that their loved ones would be happier and better off if they just didn't exist? However, throughout the movie, Zack, Tifa, and Aerith, all confront Cloud, and urge him to not give up. Cloud eventually does try again, and ultimately finds redemption not by being stuck in the past, but by letting the past rest and be beautiful (a lesson Cleriths unfortunately never learned). "I never blamed you you know, not once" "I want to be forgiven. By who?" "Isn't it about time you did the forgiving?" In the end, Cloud moves on, and therefore, so do Zack and Aerith. Aerith and Zack walk into the light, Cloud plants flowers on Zacks grave, and lets Zacks buster sword rest in Aeriths church, now no longer rusting, but shining. Instead of the past being a negative reminder, Cloud lets the past be beautiful. Cloud was doing Aerith and Zack a disservice by remembering them the way he did, because it was ruining his life, it wasn't a good thing, but it did come from a good place, from a good man whose ashamed of not being good enough. Yes, it harmed Tifa, people going through these things often do hurt those around them, but it's not because they're bad people, or even weak, but because people are imperfect and Cloud has gone through hell, both internally, and externally. Are his actions really that weird or deplorable? "He didn't even go save the kids!" Yes, he's hesitant about saving the kids, why shouldn't he be? Everyone Cloud tried to protect or save, ended up maimed or worse, or as Cloud puts it: "I can't even save myself". "He left Tifa alone!" Yes, he thinks he's going to waste away and die, can you blame him for not wanting to put Tifa through that and for thinking she'd be better off without him? "He drinks!" Wouldn't you?! Who wouldn't want to forget that stuff? But in the end, He's only gone for about a week, he never intended to harm Tifa, he never physically harmed Tifa or cheated on her, his entire life revolved around wanting to be better for Tifa and blaming himself when he wasn't good enough, how is it reasonable to say this man takes Tifa for granted when the fact that he thinks he has to BE BETTER in order to be worthy of being with her has been a constant throughout his entire life and story? He DOESN'T take Tifa for granted, that's why he's beating himself up, that's why he leaves, not because he thinks he's better than her, or that he'll always have her, or that she'll follow him like a dog, or something like that. But because of the opposite, because he thinks HE is not good enough, that SHE would be better of without him. Saying Cloud takes Tifa for granted, is honestly, simply, wrong. It's 180 degrees the opposite of what is happening in FFVII, the biggest constant in Clouds life, is that he doesn't take Tifa for granted, and I don't understand how anyone could argue otherwise.

A Clinical Analysis of Cloud's Psychology, Part I - Trauma, Dissociation, and Psychosis

This analysis was originally posted on Reddit, but I decided I wanted to archive it on this old blog too. This topic's been beaten to death already, but in light of the 25th anniversary stream and Rebirth trailer, I want to release my own take on Cloud's psychology using the lens of professional psychology. I'll cover a range of humanistic concepts and criteria from the DSM-5 (basically the bible of clinical psychiatric diagnosis) and tie them in with the lore of FFVII. Although the reasons for Cloud's identity crisis are well-known among OG fans, I'm interested in breaking down exactly why and how those factors resulted in his fabricated ex-SOLDIER persona within the context of real world psychology. I'm going to look into three main areas of exploration: trauma, identity, and reintegration. These areas will conceptualize how Cloud's experiences opened the gateway to pathology, how his understanding of himself is built and then shattered, and how the pieces come back together. This first post will cover the trauma piece, including the topics of dissociation and clinical diagnosis.

Part I - Trauma, Dissociation, and Psychosis [you are here] Part II - Identity, Self-Concept, and Mako Part III - Reintegration and Unconditional Love

One of the most common misperceptions about trauma is that any adverse experience will cause it. While it's true that adversity can cause stress, this belief undermines the remarkable resilience that humans have. The most important thing to consider is that everyone has resilience and the capacity for coping, but this differs from person to person. In the clinical context, traumatic experiences are defined as frightening, dangerous, or violent experiences that elicit strong emotions and physical reactions. People can also experience trauma by witnessing an event that threatens the life or physical security of a loved one (i.e. watching a parent die). When the stressfulness of a traumatic event exceeds a person's ability to cope, the stress becomes pathological and can be classified as trauma. The tragedy of Cloud's life is that his traumatic experiences are deeply stressful and essentially occurred back to back. Each event ticks off multiple boxes for the likelihood of trauma, and then Cloud essentially experienced them in succession, if we assume that his sense of time in Hojo's laboratory was warped due to catatonia.

Dissociation

Different people have different reactions to the same traumatic experiences, and the ex-SOLDIER persona is a unique one. Although we know Cloud's ex-SOLDIER persona is his primary consequence, there's a clinical way to contextualize what purpose it serves. Cloud's headaches are used as a constant indicator that something isn't right with him. His headaches are even described in the FFVII Remake Ultimania within his character profile (translation provided by aitaikimochi):

Cloud suffers from sudden headaches that last for brief moments. This pain is usually accompanied by flashes of his childhood, his fated opponent Sephiroth, or pieces of his past. There are times when visions of the future get mixed up as well. His headaches are filled with mysteries. Perhaps there might be more than one cause of these headaches that plague him...?

Aside from serving as narrative hints, the headaches are also connected to experiences of dissociation. Dissociation is a common consequence of trauma that center around a detachment from reality as a defense mechanism. It has numerous features, some of which open the gateway to psychosis. Let's focus on the specific features that are integrated into Cloud's story.

Memory

Memory is the largest piece of Cloud's dissociation since his ex-SOLDIER persona requires him to ignore key memories. At the start of FFVII, Cloud experienced problems with remembering anything between the Nibelheim incident and his arrival in Midgar. You could argue that Cloud has selective retrograde amnesia, but his memory between the time he left Nibelheim to join SOLDIER and the Nibelheim incident is deeply distorted, rather than unclear or largely missing. This hints to us that Cloud's memory problems are a function of dissociation, which is commonly invoked in trauma victims to protect them from memories of their traumatic experiences. Cloud's case is more complex though, since he also experiences identity problems. Even though sense of identity is also a feature of dissociation, we'll talk about it later in Part II.

Hearing voices 

Hearing voices can be considered a part of dissociation when the voices are internal, or inside the head. It's when they are external and appear to be coming from outside the body that we begin to think of psychosis. This is where fantasy starts to blur how we can interpret Cloud's psychology. Cloud mainly hears two different types of voices during his journey: Sephiroth's voice, and his own voice. Cloud hears Sephiroth's voice taunting him from time to time, and it is an external voice. However, it's important to recognize that Sephiroth is a true external influence with his own agenda. Therefore, we can assume that it really is Sephiroth speaking to Cloud, not just a fabrication of Sephiroth in Cloud's head. We know this because when he experiences a headache, Sephiroth's voice often comes after. Basically, the more unstable Cloud's identity becomes, the more he mentally vulnerable he is and the more he hears Sephiroth's voice.

The other voice, Cloud's own voice, is internal. The problem is, sometimes it's tricky to tell whether it is functioning as dissociation or as a storytelling device. The key to understanding this is recognizing that this internal voice is meant to represent Cloud's real self. Cloud's identity crisis is the core of his pathology and is portrayed as a suppression of his real self. The times when he does hear his real self appear to be moments of clarity. In this case, the voice of Cloud's real self is understood as a sign of deconstructed identity; this voice is a manifestation of dissociation.

Intense Flashbacks

Intense flashbacks are another common feature of dissociation. Again, our perception of this concept in Cloud is somewhat unclear due to the fact that flashbacks are also a storytelling mechanism. However, we can use Cloud's headaches as an indicator of whether he is recalling a memory voluntarily or involuntarily. Cloud's involuntary flashbacks are shown to be disruptive and disorienting. They will initiate sometimes due to triggers in the environment, but might also occur out of the blue. Again, these flashbacks largely tie back to Cloud's identity crisis, so it's safe to say that this is another feature of his dissociation.

Reality Testing

Reality testing refers to a person's ability to understand and distinguish the external and internal world, or reality and fantasy. When someone has problems with reality testing, he experiences hallucinations. For the most part, Cloud is able to grasp his reality and navigate the environment just fine. It's either when something in the environment triggers Cloud's memories or when Sephiroth reaches out to him that he experiences intense hallucinations, which are indeed moments of dissociation. Again though, it's sometimes hard to tell if these are fabrications of Cloud's mind or if they are purposeful illusions created by Sephiroth, especially since other party members can sometimes see Sephiroth as well. But, even though there are moments where Cloud seems to have trouble distinguishing reality from his imagination, these moments are better explained by Sephiroth's influence. Therefore, I wouldn't say that Cloud's hallucinations are a sign of psychosis.

The other complicated piece here is the knowledge that the existence of Cloud's ex-SOLDIER persona is an inherent rejection of reality. Essentially, the ex-SOLDIER persona is like a delusion, a fixed belief that is resistant to change even with the presence of conflicting evidence. Cloud has to reject the reality of who he is, what happened to him, and Zack's existence in order to keep himself grounded. This is maybe subject to change now in Rebirth, but as far as the original story goes, Cloud begins to doubt himself once he is told that his memories actually belong to another person he can't remember. So, should we still talk about psychosis?

Real World Disorders

Before we proceed, a disclaimer. I do have professional training in clinical diagnosis and psychotherapy, but ultimately I'm still playing armchair psychologist. This is just my personal take on Cloud's psychology.

When I talk about psychosis, this refers to a remarkable disconnect from reality (see the NIH). Psychotic episodes can involved disturbed thoughts and difficulty with understanding what is real and what is not. It seems appropriate to discuss psychosis in Cloud's case given that his dissociation does make us question his understanding of reality around him, including what he remembers.

One of the most common things that I've seen people speculate is Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) due to the implication of the ex-SOLDIER persona as a distinct personality. DID was formerly called Multiple Personalities Disorder, and it's pretty much what it sounds like. The key feature of DID is the presence of two or more distinct personalities that alternate in the conscious. Most of the the time, each personality (or alter, as it's often called) is unaware of what the others are doing when they have control of the conscious. See Marvel's Moon Knight for an excellent recent portrayal of DID. There's a lot of dispute about what causes DID, but the general consensus is that DID results from the combination of childhood trauma, mostly abuse or neglect. To best explain it: "in DID, traumatic memories are decontextualized and processed to retain internal and external balance, which leads to formation of alter personality states each with a sense self and agency, personal history, and a mission" (Şar, 2014).

Despite this, I'd argue we cannot say that Cloud has DID as we understand it in the real world for several reasons. The most important aspect is that Cloud doesn't consistently switch between his ex-SOLDIER persona and his real self - in fact, his real self rarely if ever comes out explicitly. Rather, it looks like as long as the ex-SOLDIER exists, the real self is suppressed. This specifically tells us that Cloud's experiencing an identity issue. Furthermore, people with DID present remarkable problems with reality testing regardless of external influences. The times that Cloud sees and hears Sephiroth are arguably still partly hallucinations, but we already established that Sephiroth is deliberately messing with Cloud's sense of reality and identity in some form. He's purposefully taunting Cloud, especially when others cannot see him. We know that Sephiroth is literally reaching out to Cloud, that this isn't all happening inside Cloud's head. Therefore, Cloud's hallucinations are likely not a sign of psychosis, and it's unclear if we can even call them hallucinations in the first place.

If I had to give an armchair DSM-5 diagnosis to Cloud, I would suggest that he has Delusional Disorder. This disorder shares some features with Schizophrenia, but does not include hallucination as a symptom. More importantly, delusional disorder doesn't feature "bizarre or odd behavior" that's often seen in other psychotic disorders. Outwardly, people with delusional disorder don't appear delusional unless the subject of the delusion is involved. I do still hesitate with this diagnosis though, mainly because Cloud ultimately does respond to information that challenges his delusion. The DSM-V does specify that "individuals with delusional disorder may be able to factually describe that others view their beliefs as irrational but are unable to accept this themselves." When Cloud is explicitly confronted with information that is inconsistent with his delusion, this in fact opens the gate for Sephiroth to convince him that he is essentially not real. If he had delusional disorder, Cloud would have continued to reject reality.

The fact of the matter is that Cloud's ex-SOLDIER persona cannot be fully understood in the context of real world psychosis. The fantasy elements of FFVII complicate diagnosis, especially considering when and how the ex-SOLDIER persona was born. Plus, I wouldn't pathologize Cloud this far given that I don't think real world psychosis best explains what happens to him. While Cloud's ex-SOLDIER persona appears to be a delusion, it doesn't present negative consequences unless he's presented with conflicting information and is vulnerable to change when challenged. Essentially, we can partly understand the ex-SOLDIER persona as an ongoing dissociation that serves to protect Cloud from the memories of traumatic experiences. But, I wouldn't go so far as to give him a DSM-5 diagnosis.

Basically, we can't fully conceptualize Cloud within the realm of psychosis or personality disorders. Rather, his dilemma revolves around the deconstruction of his identity, which I'll discuss in my next post.

Parallel #5

Selling flowers in Evergreen Park

[Previous]

“I thought you would never come”

Over the course of the game, OG FFVII plays with the mystery of Cloud and Tifa’s childhood relationship. We’re primed to think that while they may have known each other as children, there was nothing particularly noteworthy or significant about their childhood together. The framing of the Promise is a great example of this.

The first time Cloud mentions the Promise is in Midgar, when he still thinks he’s an Ex-SOLDIER. When they recount the the story together, Ex-SOLDIER Cloud says he thought Tifa would never come.

Ex-SOLDIER Cloud: I thought you would never come, and I was getting a little cold.

We assume Cloud thinks this way because Cloud was like any other boy with an adolescent crush on a girl. Just an average boy being relatably nervous about an average girl. While the story of the Promise is cute, it’s only notable in that it seems to remind Cloud of their seemingly tenuous connection (or if the player is feeling uncharitable, it seems to force an obligation between the two).

Midway through the Lifestream, we discover why Cloud thought Tifa would never come: he thought Tifa hated him.

True Cloud: That night I called Tifa out to the well… I thought to myself Tifa would never come… that she hated me.

This twist changes how we perceive Cloud and Tifa’s relationship. In the first half of this memory, Cloud reveals that he had never been inside Tifa’s room, and we learn that the two “weren’t THAT close.” (There is also the regrettable mistranslation: where the line “I really wanted to play with everyone, but I was never allowed into the group” should have been translated to something like “I really wanted to play with everyone, but I could never bring myself to ask.”) This reveal in conjunction with the line “she hated me” makes us question the true nature of their relationship. Was Tifa a stereotypical popular girl and was Cloud an outcast? Did Cloud think he’d get stood up because Tifa, in a moment of childhood cruelty, arbitrarily considered Cloud to be beneath her?

While this is certainly a dramatic twist, it still paints a relatively mundane relationship. Sure, it might suggest that Tifa might have been unkind as a child, but this isn’t particularly unusual childhood dynamic. (Even if it is a regrettable one.)

But finally, we learn why Cloud thought Tifa hated him and why she might not have met him at the well…

True Cloud:  Tifa was in a coma for seven days. We all thought she wouldn’t make it. If only I could’ve saved her… I was so angry… Angry at myself for my weakness. Ever since then, I felt Tifa blamed me…

We learn that Cloud wasn’t afraid that Tifa hated him for an arbitrary, superficial reason. Cloud’s true fear was that Tifa would want nothing to do with him because she held him responsible for her near-fatal fall at Mt. Nibel. (And of course, we later learn that this is unequivocally false–Tifa never blamed him for this incident.)

With this final reveal, we learn how significant their childhood relationship truly was. 

On Cloud’s part, we learn how deeply he cared for Tifa–so deeply that his failure to save her makes a lasting impression on him. Cloud’s failure to save Tifa weighs so heavily on his mind that even five years later on the night of the Promise, Cloud worries that she might not show up. On top of that, this failure weighs so heavily on his mind that Cloud decides to become a SOLDIER so he can be strong enough to win her notice. Cloud’s failure to save Tifa is the reason why Cloud is the way he is–both his true self and his ex-SOLDIER persona. 

On Tifa’s part, we learn that she wasn’t a superficial girl who was arbitrarily unkind to Cloud. She herself was acting in good faith, and her lateness to the well was not out of cruelty. While they may not have been “THAT close,” Tifa still cared enough to get dressed up and go out to the well to meet Cloud. This speaks to how Tifa held Cloud in her esteem and never held ill will towards him.

And yes, this last part is confirmed:

As a small boy, he didn’t get along with others apart from Tifa. So when Tifa’s mother died and three of her friends decided to take her up the mountains where the dead were believed to go, Cloud wasn’t invited. But even so, Cloud secretly went after them wanting to cheer Tifa up. –Cloud profile AC prologue.

(Source: this excellent post) 

(Yes, poor Cloud really went through the better part of a decade thinking he lost the only person who treated him with kindness because he failed her….)

So through the context of the Promise, we slowly learn how important Tifa has always been to Cloud–and the answer is, she is really, REALLY important. But if you miss that final twist that ties in Mt. Nibel, then you miss this bigger story that the context of the Promise tells us.

What about Remake?

Interestingly, Remake removed the setup for the mystery of Cloud and Tifa’s relationship. Ex-SOLDIER Cloud remembers the Promise on his own, and doesn’t comment on Tifa’s lateness at all! The player is given no reason to doubt Tifa’s good intentions towards Cloud, and thus no reason to doubt their importance to one another as children.

In a game that nails the small callbacks, this is would be a massive oversight… meaning that it’s not an oversight, but an intentional change. This seems to be yet another example of Remake clarifying Cloud and Tifa’s relationship, be it by removing OG’s red herrings or removing the ambiguous moments that generated confusion in the first place.

Zerith and Cloti Lines & Quotes Parallels

FFVII Original Game, Advent Children (sequel), and Crisis Core (prequel) are written by Kazushige Nojima…. so it’s not surprised to see how he wrote both pairings in similar way as I found these parallels:

Parallel #1: KOIBITO ( 恋人 )

Zack and Aerith

The two characters deeply involved with Aerith were Zack, who would become her lover (koibito), and Tseng, her guardian.  (CC: FFVII Complete Guide)

One day, Zack is suddenly landed in a church in the slum. His cheerfulness and dependability capture Aerith’s heart and they’re being in a (koibito) lovers-like relationship. Although they can only see each other periodically, their thoughts keep them close in spirit. (Aerith’s profile, CC: FFVII Ultimania, pg. 22)

Cloud and Tifa

“Is Tifa your girlfriend (koibito)?” (Aerith asking Cloud, FFVII Remake Chapter 8)

There are many dimensions to Tifa’s character. She’s like a mother, also a sweetheart (koibito), and a close ally in battle (Advent Children Reunion Files book, pg. 19~ Nomura’s interview)

Parallel #2: SWEET YOUNG LOVE, WHAT SHE LIKES ABOUT HIM 

Aerith about 16 years old Zack: 

“He’s strong, kinda funny, and there’s something special about him.”  (Crisis Core Chapter 5 - First Date) 

Tifa about 14 years old Cloud: 

“You were so small then … and cute.”  (Original Game scene 116 - Cloud Dark Past) 

Parallel #3: SHE DRESSES UP FOR THE PROMISE THEY MADE

Zack and Aerith

For when they meet again on their next date, Zack’s specific suggestion was Aerith wearing pink. Aerith–who continued to wait for Zack’s return–starts to wear pink after making this promise (CC: FFVII Complete Guide–Keyword Collection)

Cloud and Tifa

Believing in Cloud’s promise, Tifa’s waiting to see Cloud become a SOLDIER like Sephiroth. Tifa dresses herself in a pretty and sexy look. Does she do that to spirit up herself in preparing for a touching reunion? (Tifa Lockhart Character Profile from CC: FFVII Ultimania)

Parallel #4: SHE ASKED IF HE KNEW A CERTAIN SOLDIER

Zerith: Aerith asked Cloud about Zack in SOLDIER in the Playground (FF7 Remake)

“Did you have any SOLDIER friends? Any war buddies? So Cloud, you were SOLDIER 1st Class, right? Weird. Just that you were in the same rank with the first guy I ever loved.”

Cloti: Tifa asked Zack about Cloud in SOLDIER via mails (Crisis Core)

“Are there any blond guys in SOLDIER?  Well, it’s just a dream… Any girl would love to have a blond SOLDIER guy protect her when she’s in a pinch. I almost forgot. Please don’t tell anyone in SOLDIER that I asked about the blond guy. Okay?” 

Parallel #5: THEY THINK OF EACH OTHER UNDER THE SKY

Zack and Aerith – the cloudy & azure sky

Zack think of Aerith:  “I wish I could show this sky to…” (Crisis Core DMW Cloud Scene #4: Cloudy Sky)

Aerith think of Zack: “He was like a cloud drifting through the skies. As we peered skyward through the rafters of a heavenless Midgar, we made a promise. And that was the last time we spoke.” (Crisis Core 1st Official Trailer)

Cloud and Tifa – the starry & night sky

Cloud think of Tifa: “I was just thinking about the past.”  (Crisis Core DMW Cloud Scene #3: Starry Night At The Well)

Tifa think of Cloud: “Like the sky that night, the heavens were filled with stars. Did you imagine the sky? The stars were gorgeous. It was just Cloud and I. We talked at the well.”  (Original Game scene 116 - Cloud’s Dark Past)

Parallel #6: PROMISE AT THE NIBELHEIM WELL/WATER TOWER

Zack and Aerith –  CC Chapter 013: I Promise

Aerith: Hello… (calling by phone) Zack: Aerith! Aerith: Finally, got through to you! Zack: Ah, sorry about this but I’m in the middle of something right now. I’ll  give you a call a little later . Aerith: No. it’s okay. You don’t have to. Zack: I understand. I’ll come visit. Aerith: I’ll be waiting. Zack: I’Il see you. It’s a promise.

Cloud and Tifa –  OG scene 6: A Childhood Promise

Tifa: You said you wanna tell me something. Cloud: This summer… I wanna leave this town to Midgar. I wanna join SOLDIER… like Sephiroth. Tifa: Is it tough being SOLDIER, isn’t it? Cloud: Yeah, I probably could not go back to this town for a while. Tifa: Hey, why don’t we make a promise? Mmm… if you really get famous and I’m ever in a bind, you’ll come save me, alright? Whenever  I’m in a trouble, my hero will come rescue me. Cloud: Alright, I promise.

Parallel #7: SHE WON’T BE AFRAID WITH HIM, HE PROMISED

Zack and Aerith – CC Chapter 8: 23 Little Luxuries

Aerith: “When you come back from your assignment, let’s go sell flowers under the sky together. I won’t be afraid if you’re with me.”

Zack: “Yeah, I’ll go with you. That’s a promise.”

Cloud and Tifa – OG Scene 136: Understanding

Tifa: “But, it’s alright even if no one comes back. As long as I’m with you… As long as you’re by my side… I won’t give up even if I’m scared.”

Cloud: “Afterall, I promised. That if anything were to ever happen to you, I would come to help.”

Parallel #8: MUTUAL AFFECTIONS/RECIPROCAL FEELINGS

Zack and Aerith

Zack and Aerith meet by chance in a church in the Slums. They become intimate with each other. (FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania Compilation Timeline)

From the boy’s profile

Having fallen into the sector 5 slum church during a mission, Zack has a fateful meeting with Aerith, a young girl who was tending to flowers in the church. They share a “puratonikku koi” / chaste romantic love, satisfied just to be together. Those joyous days seemed like they would last forever… (Zack’s Profile, CC: FFVII Ultimania, pg. 13)

From the girl’s profile

CC shows her meeting and relationship with Zack, and the budding love between them. However, fate would tear the couple apart. (Aerith’s Dengeki Profile)

At that chosen day, she accidentally met Zack, SOLDIER 1st Class, and they were attracted to each other. (Aerith’s Profile, FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania)

The destined encounter with Zack makes them becomes the irreplaceable existence to each other.  (Aerith’s profile, CC: FFVII Ultimania)

His cheerfulness and dependability capture Aerith’s heart and they’re being in a lovers-like relationship. (Aerith’s profile, CC: FFVII Ultimania)

Cloud and Tifa

When their companions disperse to the places where people important to them await, Cloud and Tifa, who remain, reveal their feelings for each other together. (FFVII Ultimania Omega, pg. 198; story summary)

When Cloud and Tifa remain behind alone, in their final hours, together they disclose their feelings for each other. (FF 20th Anniversary Ultimania File 2: Scenario guide, FFVII Story Summary, pg. 232)  

From the boy’s profile

Declares that the team should dissolve in the final hours before the final battle, and communicates his feelings together with Tifa, who remains behind at the airship with him. (Cloud’s Profile, FFVII Ultimania Omega, pg. 15)

From the girl’s profile 

She ventured into Lifestream together with Cloud. Amidst the course of him trying to ascertain his memories, they became aware of the thoughts/feelings which each other was holding. (Tifa’s Profile, FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania. pg. 42-47)

In FF7, Tifa is the only one who knows Cloud’s childhood, and furthermore, she holds the key to people involved in the story of Nibelheim’s burning down, which is also depicted in CC. She and Cloud came to realize their feelings for each other in the end of the story, and live together in AC and DC.(CC:FFVII Ultimania, Tifa Lockhart Profile)

For many years, Cloud and Tifa have been holding favor for one another. At last facing the impending final battle with Sephiroth, they confirm together their feelings of desire toward partnership. (Tifa’s Profile, FF 25th Memorial Ultimania)

Parallel #9: THEY GO BACK TO WHERE THEY BELONG

Zack and Aerith – Afterlife

Zack Profile in FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania: In order to help Cloud recover, he assured him from the Lifestream together with Aerith.

Aerith Profile in ACC Dengeki: She joined the Lifestream, but even then she carries on watching over the planet and Cloud. At all times, her first love Zack is always by her side.

Both are mentioned: …She starts to leave, together with the friend who had given his life to Cloud. Cloud no longer has to suffer in loneliness. And so they too go back to where they belong. Back to the current of life flowing around the planet. (FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania–Revised Edition, ACC Playback)

Cloud and Tifa – Living World

Cloud Profile in FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania: With the help of his friends, he defeated Bahamut SHIN, which Kadaj’s gang had summoned. He defeated Sephiroth after his Advent, and returned to Tifa and the children.

Tifa Profile in ACC Dengeki: At the end of a long struggle, she gently welcomes back Cloud on his return home after settling things with himself.

Both are mentioned: “Inside, I felt one thing was for sure: Cloud and Tifa would be together. Everybody would be living back home where they belonged.” (Kazushige Nojima-the scriptwriter, Advent Children Reunion Files book)

Parallel #10: DESCRIBED AS A SINGULAR ITEM / A PAIR

Zack and Aerith described in ACC

For Cloud, they were people whom he can never forget. The two irreplaceable people; Zack, “who was sent to death because protecting me” and Aerith, “who met a tragic fate as I couldn’t protect her” became “the unforgivable sins” in his heart.

(Advent Children Complete Post Card Book)

Cloud and Tifa described in CC

Cloud and Tifa are childhood friends, both born in Nibelheim. When Cloud leaves the village, he calls Tifa out to the water tower and promises that he will become a SOLDIER. At the same time, he is also made by Tifa to promise that he will come to rescue her if she is ever in trouble.

Following this, the pair experience many hardships, such as the Nibelheim incident which also appears in CC, and the Jenova War in FFVII, and through these the distance between them shortens. And in AC they live together, with Barret’s daughter Marlene, and a boy named Denzel. Though there was also a period later where Cloud lived away from them after having contracted Geostigma, they finally reach a commune with each over and return to living together once again. In DC, they rush together to Vincent’s aid, in his battle against Deep Ground SOLDIER.

(CC:FFVII Complete Guide Book)

Cloud’s character arc in a single sentence

IT CLICKED

I GOT IT

Rufus sees the Whispers in Shinra HQ because he’s in the process of exterminating greater Avalanche.

This is why Rufus’s reaction to and relationship with the Whispers seems so odd. They’re helping him. And he doesn’t realize it. Rufus is the only character whose reaction to seeing the Whispers for the first time isn’t to try to fight them or run away – rather, he actually moves towards them and is so entranced by them that he’s still staring out the window long after they’re gone.

Let’s back up.

In Before Crisis (which appears to be canon-ish for the Remake, considering the reference to the assassination attempt on President Shinra and the greater organization of Avalanche as a whole), Rufus was Avalanche’s inside contact. He provided them with information on Shinra and funded their terrorist campaign.

In the Remake, Mayor Domino refers to himself as being Avalanche’s man on the inside, which initially made a bunch of Rufus fans (myself included) scratch their heads a bit. But when looking closer, it becomes pretty clear that Domino is working with Rufus to fund/assist Avalanche and undermine Papa Shinra’s administration.

However, also established in Before Crisis is the detail that Rufus never cared about Avalanche as an organization nor the fate of the planet itself. He was simply using them as pawns to murder and usurp his father.

As we can see from Rufus’s introduction, once Papa Shinra is dead, Rufus doesn’t need Avalanche anymore. He shoots down the Avalanche extraction chopper and steps onto the scene in order to personally declare face-to-face that the alliance is off.

So, the order of events is:

1. Rufus puts the call out to Avalanche HQ to storm Shinra HQ and flush out the president.

2. Rufus calls Domino and tells him to assist Avalanche once they get to the building so that they can remain unseen in their journey to the top floors.

3. Cloud, Barret, and Tifa coincidentally happen to show up first, unaware of the larger plot about to take place. Domino assists them on their ascent, assuming that they’re the ones to carry out the mission at hand.

4. Rufus calls Tseng and mobilizes the Turks. Reno and Rude go to pick up Rufus, who is likely planning on pulling the trigger on his father himself while Avalanche causes chaos and creates an opening to do so.

5. Aeris is rescued.

6. Larger Avalanche (along with Wedge) arrive on scene to carry out the assassination attempt.

7. Rufus arrives on scene and very smugly makes it a point to personally give the order to arrest who he believes to be Avalanche operatives who are only there in the first place by his orders. Boss fight occurs.

8. Meanwhile, Tseng is searching for President Shinra, unaware that he’s already dead at this time.

9. Cloud, Barret, Tifa, Aeris, and Red XIII make their escape from Shinra HQ.

10. The Whispers surround the Shinra tower.

11. Rufus enters the Executive Suite and sees the Whispers for the first time.

12. Tseng gets a call from someone (presumably Reno) and is pleased by what he hears. He tells Rufus that “The men are on standby.” To which Rufus responds, “Bring them in.”

13. Rufus gives Reno and Rude the order to exterminate every Avalanche operative still on site.

Now, I realize that 12 and 13 are a little bit vague, and you might be wondering how I arrived at number 13 at all.

The important thing to understand that the main narrative tool that FF7R utilizes is misdirection. Rufus’s line of “bring them in” is just one example of many. After he says this, the scene cuts back to Cloud & co. on the highway as Shinra soldiers are deployed after them, so the immediate assumption is that Rufus just gave the order to dispatch soldiers to detain the party. 

However, if this line was truly in reference to the pursuit of Cloud & co, then Tseng’s phone conversation no longer makes sense. We hear him say, “I see. Very good.” This reaction isn’t internally consistent with the idea that someone has just told him that the party has escaped.

More likely, Tseng was getting an update from Reno that the chopper has been parked and they’ve returned to HQ. “The men are on standby” – Reno and Rude are back and awaiting orders. Rufus then gives Tseng the order to have Reno and Rude come into the office. There, the order is given to take out Avalanche.  This also explains why Reno and Rude are missing from the final sequence in which Rufus takes the throne – they’re still likely out and about in the aftermath of the mass murder they just performed.

The Whispers are non-hostile to Rufus, and he seems completely distracted and mesmerized by them. He can see them, but they’re not impeding his progress in any way.

Avalanche HQ are not supposed to be at Shinra HQ. This is not how the original script/”destiny” plays out. So, by giving the order to hunt down and kill every Avalanche operative, he’s actually doing the bidding of destiny/The Whispers, even if he doesn’t realize it. He’s basically doing the Whispers’ job for them.

So when the order comes, the Whispers decide to help out and encircle the Shinra building in order to ensure that none of them escape.

Knowingly or not, the Whispers serve to establish the bounds of Rufus’s villainy and mercilessness. His inaugural speech about ruling the world through fear is no longer necessary, as he’s just turned Shinra HQ into a locked-down prison for the “heroic” team, in which he orders and orchestrates a bloodbath.