SHINGEKI NO KYOJIN S04E14 — Ignorance Is The Opposite Of Being Free. I Am Free.

Tobikichi Usahara ✭ Lost Time

Cat’s Note: Why are all of the men in this show so 🦆ing attractive? Uramichi and Kumatani coming soon 🤭

Summary: You broke up with him 4 years ago. Surely, he’s moved on by now, even if you haven’t. But what if he’s still stuck on you just as much as you are on him?

WC: 4.6k

Genre: exes to lovers, fluff

warnings: n/a, barely proofread, random OC

"Oh, Y/n! The girls and I are going bar hopping tomorrow, you should totally go with us!" Your friend Yumi says, lifting a stack of glass plates from a box and placing them on the kitchen counter.

You've just graduated from college, finally returning to Tokyo after 4 long years. Most people would have returned home during breaks, but you, however, had decided to remain in Sendai to work in between semesters. Most people also would have gone to college at 18. But you didn't go until you were 22, having been inspired by your ex-boyfriend's job as an actor to start pursuing videography.

So now here you are, freshly graduated, moving into a new apartment, and very happy to be home. You look over at Yumi as you carry another box into the kitchen, grunting harshly as you hoist it onto the table.

"Bar hopping?" You repeat. You reach for one of the many knives laying around and tear it through the tape on the box, carefully pulling out the pots and pans laying inside. "It may be 4 years since we've been together, but I'm sure you remember I'm not a big fan of bar hopping," you laugh lightly.

"Ahh, yeah, I do remember," Yumi giggles in return, moving the stack of plates into their designated cabinet. "But I do think it would be fun! You said you didn't have much time to go out when you were at school, well, now you have plenty of time!" She turns back to you with a bright smile. "And you never know, maybe you'll meet a cute guy while we're out," she smirks. You roll your eyes at this.

Ever since you broke things off with your ex 4 years ago, Yumi has asked relentlessly about your love life. And while there was never really anything to report, she always seemed happy to hear that you were still single.

"Please, I don't think I'll ever find love again," you sigh overdramatically, pressing the back of your hand to your forehead to nail your performance. As soon as the words leave your mouth, you pause, closing your eyes and bracing yourself for the next words to come from Yumi.

"...you're still not really over Usahara, are you?" Aaand there it is, question number 2 on the FAQ list. Yumi doesn't ask it nearly as much as the first, but she still asks often enough that you can basically tell when it's coming. And you're also tired of hearing it. Not because she keeps asking, you know she just wants to check in on you, see how you're feeling. But because your answer is always the same. 4 years of no contact, and your ex is still on your mind almost constantly.

You can only blame yourself really. You're the one who broke up with him when everything was perfect, when he wanted to stay together, when he was confident that your relationship could survive the distance once you left for school. But you weren't. You knew long distance would strain your relationship too much. It was inevitable. You were just saving yourselves the extra pain. At least, that's what you thought.

4 years and you've only had one boyfriend, and he only lasted for about 3 months. The time in between was full of failed first dates, ghostings, and creeps who were just looking to get laid. Not once did you meet someone who made your heart stop and your stomach flutter the way Usahara did. And you're beginning to wonder if you'll ever experience that feeling again. You groan and go back to unpacking your kitchen supplies.

"I think you know the answer to that, and I would rather not talk about it," you mutter. You turn to put the pots in a cabinet, missing the all-knowing smirk on your friend's face.

"Okay, we can drop the subject. But still, you should come with us! Besides, I want to buy you your first drink back in Tokyo!"

Well, can't argue with that, can you? You stop to think for a moment. Sure, you hate bar hopping, but it would probably do you some good to get out and socialize. And Yumi's right, you never know who you might meet. Maybe Tokyo guys are better than Sendai guys. Won't know unless you try, right?

"Haha. Okay, Yumi, I'll go," you say, reflecting your friend's happy grin.

"Yes!" Yumi exclaims, swaying her hips in a little happy dance.

"BUT!" You interject, cutting Yumi's celebration short. "We're not going out super late."

"No problem!"

"And when I'm exhausted and ready to go, we go?"

"Absolutely!" You would think you'd just told her that you won a million dollars and are giving her half based on the blinding smile on her face. Why is she so excited to go drinking? Should you be worried? You brush it off, chalking it up to your high school bestie just being happy to spend time with you after being apart for so long. You just hope you have enough energy tomorrow to be "Fun Y/n" and not "Tired and Cranky Y/n".

"Alright! Let's at least get your kitchen finished before we call it a night!" Yumi says, moving on to another box. You hum in agreement and follow suit.

"Ready to go?" Yumi calls. You walk into the bathroom to see her putting on her earrings, the finishing touch to her evening outfit.

"Whenever you are," you chirp. You tug lightly at the hem of the little black dress you're wearing. "Is it really okay that I wear this?" Yumi turns away from the mirror to look at you, her jaw dropping.

"Y/n you look gorgeous! That dress fits you a lot better than it does me. Any man should feel lucky to have you even spare them a glance!"

"Is your plan for us to hang out or to find me a boyfriend?" You laugh

"Why not both?" Yumi jokes back. "Seriously though, you should keep that dress. I never wear it anyway." You look at yourself in the mirror and damn, this dress does look nice on you. You mentally agree with Yumi's statement, any man should feel lucky. "The others said they would meet us at the bar, so we can head on over!"

With a new sense of self-confidence, you and Yumi leave your apartment to head to the first bar just a short walk away.

You get there and say hello to the group of girls, some of which you haven't seen since high school. The girls all order a shot or two, trying to get a little buzzed while you're at the cheapest place on the route. You order a drink that's a little lighter on the alcohol, not wanting to risk getting too drunk this early on. Once you're done there, it's on to the next place, and so on.

By the time your little group starts to leave the third bar, some of the girls are already starting to feel the effects of the shots they've taken. Yumi glances at the time on her phone and raises her voice to get everyone's attention.

"Hey, we should go to that little lounge on the next street over!" She suggests excitedly. Before you can agree, some of the other girls speak up.

"The lounge? I thought you didn't like that place?"

"Yeah, you always say it's kinda sketchy."

You turn to Yumi to see how she explains her sudden change of heart, only to see her fiddling with her fingers, something she does nervous. Or when she's planning something.

"Ahh, yeah I know but... but they have a really good happy hour deal at this time!" The girls tilt their heads in question but agree to go nonetheless. You make your way to the next street and see your destination ahead of you and, yeah, it does look a bit sketchy. But, no one says anything as you enter the little hangout.

"Let's sit over here!" Yumi says, darting ahead toward the end of the bar table. You all look at each other, mutually confused by Yumi's sudden enthusiasm and determination to, not only visit this specific bar, but also sit in a specific spot. But you swallow your questions and follow. The first thing you notice is how dark it is, and you don't believe it's purposeful mood lighting either. The second thing is the lack of people. Granted, it's a small bar, but even so, the seating isn't half full. Why are you here again?

You sit beside Yumi who has an unusually bright smile, even for her. You all order your drinks and take your time with them, catching up with each other in quiet chit-chat. You're there for a short time before a couple of guys enter the lounge, walking past the bar to sit at a table already occupied by a couple others.

"Heyyy, sorry we're late, we totally lost track of time," a man speaks from the table. His voice sounds familiar, almost comforting, but you’re too preoccupied with watching Yumi take a shot to really think about it.

"I think you mean you lost track of time," a second, more monotone voice speaks.

"Dude, seriously?!" Okay, you know you know that voice. You lean forward against the bar to take a quick glance past Yumi to the table several feet away from you. You quickly scan over the people, trying to be as casual as possible. You see two dark-haired men sitting beside each other, talking quietly with very neutral expressions, making you question whether they want to be there or not. You feel like you recognize the black-haired man, though you can’t place where you’ve seen him.

To their left is a very drunk woman, tears streaming down her flushed face. Beside her is another man with his face turned away from you, his blond hair, that's obviously dyed and desperately needs a retouch, is swept to the side and clipped with a... strawberry barrette?

Your quick and casual glance becomes a stare as you squint in an attempt to see the hair accessory better. You used to have a hair clip just like that one. You wore it all the time and were quite upset when you lost it. Before it can click in your mind, the man turns just enough for you to see his face and...

No, it's not. There's no way. You feel your heart flutter in a way it hasn't in years, but you still refuse to believe what you're seeing. Yumi notices your shocked expression and follows your line of sight, her eyes widening slightly when they land on the table.

"Yooo, is that who I think it is?"

"I'm... I'm pretty sure it is," you say, dazed. It's Usahara, sitting at the table beside you, wearing the hair barrette you lost at his place years ago.

"You should go say hi!" Yumi encourages, patting you on the arm excitedly. You almost get up from your seat right then, but the little shred of hope in your heart disappears when the crying woman suddenly crashes against Usahara's chest and his arms wrap around her. Yumi, whose eyes are trained on you, completely misses what's happening. "You never know, maybe you can pick up where you left off."

You quickly turn your eyes back to your drink, sinking into your seat.

"I doubt that. It was so long ago, I'm sure he's had several girlfriends since then. Look, he's with someone now," you state bluntly. Yumi turns back to see who you're talking about. The woman is now sitting up again, her face buried in her hands, shoulders shaking. She looks to Usahara who is sitting awkwardly, clearly unsure of how to handle the situation.

"Uhh, something tells me it's not like that," Yumi says. She turns back to you and places a gentle hand on your arm. "Come on, Y/n, just say hi. If he's not happy to see you, then we'll hit the next bar and get so drunk you'll forget you even saw him." Yumi grins and you realize it's the same suspicious smile she's had since she mentioned bar hopping the night before. Hold on a second.

"Why do I get the feeling you knew he'd be here?" You say, knowing it sounds like a serious accusation. But the moment the words leave your mouth, Yumi freezes. Gotcha.

"Whaaat? Nooo we're here for the happy hour! Remember?" She waves her hands around as though to distract you as she does her best to defend herself. You give her a "be honest" glare and she cracks within a second. "Okay, yeah, I see him and his friends here a lot, the chances were pretty high," she mutters.

"And that's why you wanted to come here so badly, isn't it?" You question further. Yumi stares into her drink and starts fiddling with her fingers again.

"Umm, that... might've been part of why. But that's beside the point!" She exclaims, looking back up at you. "We're here, he's here, and you should say something!" You remain quiet, unsure if you really should say anything or just try to leave without being seen. And Yumi seems to be able to tell exactly what you're thinking. "If you don't I will."

Uh oh. If there's one thing you've learned about Yumi in your years of being friends, it's that she's not afraid to embarrass herself. If she says she'll do something, chances are, she will. Before you can even respond, Yumi is taking a breath and turning in her chair, ready to shout to the table.

"HE-" she starts, and you swear your heart stops. You grab her arms and pull her back around to you, stopping her call before it gets very loud.

You hide behind her, mortified that she may have accomplished her goal and drawn some attention. You peek over her shoulder thankful to see that Usahara is too busy drinking his beer to have noticed anything. But before you can sigh in relief, your eyes meet those of the man on the other side of the table, and by the look in his steely grey eyes, it's safe to say Yumi had caught his attention. He breaks eye contact, turns back to his friends, and doesn't say a word.

"Okay, okay," you whisper, letting go of Yumi's arms "Just, please don't yell." Yumi giggles happily, satisfied that her plan is working. You take a deep breath and finish your drink quickly before getting up from your seat and adjusting your dress. Your heart is pounding in your chest, but you realize, it's not entirely of anxiety, but excitement. Yumi takes your hand and gives it an encouraging squeeze.

"I'll be right here, ready to support or fly out of here at the slightest notice." You squeeze her hand back and smile. You let go and make your way over to the table. The first person to notice you approaching is the same man you'd made eye contact with just moments before, though he remains quiet. Usahara is distracted with cleaning up a bit of beer that had been knocked over, still completely unaware of your presence. By this point, you've caught everyone's attention, everyone aside from Usahara.

"Tobikichi?" You say, your voice just barely above a whisper. Usahara stops his cleaning, but it takes him a second before he turns to you. His eyes meet yours and, there they are, the special butterflies that you've dreamed of having again since you saw him last.

"No way... Y/n?" Usahara says, not believing his eyes. His look of shock flips into one of joy as he jumps from his seat and, without a second thought, he's wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug. You hug him back, taking the moment to breathe in his familiar and comforting scent. Yep, he still wears the same cheap cologne. You never knew you could miss a smell so much until you'd said goodbye. He slowly pulls away from you, cool grey eyes scanning over you.

"You look beautiful..." He blurts, causing you both to blush. Before you can accept his compliment, he's moving on. "Haha, ahh, what are you doing here?"

“I’m back from school,” you answer softly. Usahara’s smile grows impossibly wider.

“Like, back for good?”

“Yeah, for good,” you nod in confirmation. Usahara perks, suddenly remembering who he’s with. He moves to stand beside you and places his on your shoulder, sending sparks down your back.

“Oh, by the way!” He starts, lifting his hand to gesture to his table of friends. “You’ve met Kumatani before, right?” Ahh, that’s why he seemed familiar.

“We met once,” Kumatani replies stoically. And now you remember. You’d only met him once, but Usahara would talk about him a lot. He was down to earth and wasn’t afraid to put Usahara in his place when needed. You appreciated it.

“Thought so!” Usahara says, moving on to the other two people. “This is Uramichi and Utano. They’re my co-workers.” You feel relief when you hear “co-workers”. Yumi was right, it isn’t like that. “Too bad Iketeru isn’t here. He’s not a big drinker, so he backed out for tonight.”

“So, how do you guys know each other?” Uramichi asks, suspicious that his annoying co-worker could be friends with someone like you. You and Usahara freeze, neither of you wanting to answer.

“They dated several years ago,” Kumatani answers for you without hesitation. Utano sits straight up, tears still streaming down her face, but at least she’s no longer sobbing.

“Oh, are you the ex he’s always talking about?” She sniffs. You look at her, confused.

“What?” You ask, hoping to get her to elaborate, and Kumatani starts to do just that.

“He talks about you a lot when he’s dru-”

“OKAY!” Usahara shouts, stepping a bit in front of you and cutting Kumatani off before he can expose him any further. “I don’t think we need to talk about any of that.” Actually, yes, I think we do. “Anyway, uhh, are you here by yourself?”

“Hmm? Oh, no, I’m here with-” your sentence is stopped midway through when an arm is slung over your shoulders.

“Me!” Yumi says, leaning over you.

“Oh, Yumi! Long time no see, huh?” Usahara greets.

“Yeaaah, real long time!” Yumi smiles. “Y/n, the girls and I are thinking about getting one more round and then heading out,” she says, pointing back to the bar. You’re about to say that you’ll be right over when Usahara starts to speak.

“Hey, let me buy you a drink!” He offers happily, making Yumi smile.

“Oh, that’s not necessary!” You say.

“Please? As a welcome home,” He says, already pulling out his wallet and heading back to the bar.

“Come on, don’t say no to a free drink!” Yumi pulls you by your arm to follow, and you do, albeit hesitantly. Once you’re at the bar, Yumi returns to the group, leaving you and Usahara there alone.

“Get what you want,” Usahara says after taking a quick flip through his wallet.

“You have the money to make that kind of offer?” You tease.

“WHA-hey! I’ll have you know I’ve gotten better at handling money… kind of.”

“Mhmm?”

“Whatever, I wouldn’t offer if I wasn’t sure.” His face grows red and you laugh at his response. Your eyes catch sight of the little pink and red accessory in his hair again, contrasting sharply against his bleach blond hair.

“By the way, is that my strawberry barrette you’re wearing?” His face couldn’t possibly get any more flushed. His hand flies up to the clip and removes it.

“It… might be,” he mumbles. His hands play around with it, bending the clip back and forth.

“I can’t believe you still have it after all this time,” you whisper. Usahara smiles fondly.

“Well, it is pretty handy,” he jokes. His fidgeting stops and he places the barrette onto the table, sliding it towards you. “Here, you can have it back.” You pick up the hair clip and examine it closely. It looks almost exactly the same as the day you last saw it, aside from some chipped plastic coating on the sides. He’s taken very good care of it. You run your thumb over the bumpy, textured strawberry.

“You keep it,” you say softly. You reach for his hair and gently sweep it behind his ear, clipping it in place with the barrette. “It looks better on you anyway.” Jeez, are you purposefully trying to fluster him? Usahara laughs nervously and rubs his clammy hands on his pants. If his heart beats any faster, he’s convinced it’ll burst right out from his chest.

You order your drinks and sit in awkward silence as you try to figure out what to talk about. You have so much, 4 years' worth. Where do you start?

“So… have you dated anyone since we broke up?” Well, guess that’s one place to start.

“Umm… not really. There was this one guy who lasted a few months, but he turned out to be a total creep,” you answer honestly, your voice faltering a bit.

“Ahh, gotcha,” he says awkwardly. You drag a finger over your glass, watching as the condensation collects and runs down the cool surface.

“What about you? I’m sure you’ve had a girl or two over the last few years, Mr. Mascot,” you laugh lightly, trying to relieve the strange and uncomfortable pressure.

“Haha, I, uh, haven’t had any, actually…”

…Oh

“Hey, Y/n,” Yumi calls. You turn to see her and the others gathering their purses and standing from their seats, some struggling a little more than others. “We’re heading to the next bar. You coming?” Before you can even think of what to answer with, Yumi is shooting you a look that screams “don’t you dare say ‘yes’”. You smile, this was for sure her plan the entire time.

“I think I’ll stay here for a bit longer.” Yumi beams at your reply and walks over to hug you.

“Okay! I’ll see you tomorrow then. Still on for dinner?”

“Yeah of course!”

“Great!” Yumi moves her gaze from you to the man beside you giving him a sweet but serious glare. “Usahara, take care of my girl, ‘kay? Don’t let anything happen to her.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Usahara says nervously. Yumi gives you both another wide smile before walking out the door to catch up with the others. “She’s still as intimidating as I remember,” he says, making you laugh.

You turn back around and catch Usahara already looking at you, an unreadable grin on his face. As soon as you make eye contact, his smile drops and his head whips in a different direction. Subtle. You two resume conversation, catching up on everything you’ve missed out on each other. Usahara’s friends eventually leave as well, leaving just the two of you. You talk about everything, how your schooling went and how much you hate-loved it, how he’s still working as a bunny mascot on a children’s show but he’s generally happy with where he is. Once the initial awkwardness is gone, you speak like no time has passed. It’s as though you had just seen each other yesterday, rather than 4 years ago.

Usahara’s phone buzzes, prompting him to pick it up. His eyes widen when he sees the time. 3 hours have passed, and neither of you can believe it.

“We should probably get going,” he says reluctantly, and you agree. You both stand from the bar and head towards the door where Usahara rushes ahead of you to open it for you. “Let me walk you home!” His proposal catches you off guard.

“You don’t have to do that, I don’t live far,” you say, not wanting him to feel obligated to.

“It’s okay, I want to,” he says confidently. He wants to. You half expected to walk out this door, say your goodbyes, and then be hit with the reality that he didn’t want to see you again. But instead, he’s offering to walk you home because he wants to. You don’t trust your voice to come out clearly, so you just nod and start walking toward your apartment.

The short walk there is silent, but this time, an easy, relaxed silence. You climb the stairs to your doorstep and pull out your keys to unlock your door before you turn back to the man. The atmosphere that was comfortable just a moment ago, is now tense and awkward.

“Thank you for walking me… it was really good to see you, Tobikichi,” you say softly.

“Of course, it was good to see you too,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck and shifting his weight from side to side. “I’m glad to see you’re doing well.” You continue to stand there; neither of you wants to say goodbye. Then, almost subconsciously, you’re stepping forward and wrapping your arms around his torso, burying your face into the crook of his neck. You feel his muscles tense in surprise before he relaxes and returns your embrace, an arm snaking around your waist and a hand gently holding the back of your head, pressing you closer against him. You have no idea how long you stood there, entangled in each other’s arms and soaking in each other’s warmth. You grasp him as though you’re afraid he’ll disappear.

Usahara finally pulls away from you slowly, but he stops when your eyes meet his. A beat passes before-

“Can I kiss you?” He blurts. What? You don’t answer, your mind still trying to process to be sure you heard him right. Thinking he’s made a mistake, Usahara’s grip starts to loosen, his arm slipping from your side. But before he can let go, you grab onto his shirt, pulling him back against you.

“Please,” you practically whimper. Usually, you would cringe at your behavior. Begging a man to kiss you? Come on. But right now, you can’t find it in you to care about how desperate you may look. You just want his lips on yours, and it’s the only thing you can attempt to be concerned about. His face gets hot, turning almost as pink as the barrette still in his hair, and you can’t help but think it’s a good color on him.

His hands return to your waist, holding you firmly as he leans his face closer to yours. A sharp chill runs down your spine when his lips ghost over yours and you find yourself suppressing a whine that threatens to escape your throat. Usahara smiles mischievously, proud of the reaction he’s so easily able to draw from you. But, as much as he enjoys teasing you, he can’t wait any longer.

His hand runs from your waist, up your side, and to your neck, cradling your face gently. And then, finally, he places a tender kiss against your lips. It’s delicate, familiar, the feeling of his lips moving lightly against yours, like he’s afraid he may break you. Your fists ball in his shirt, tugging him further down in a silent plea, and you feel his lips curve in a smile against yours.

He takes a careful step forward, pushing your back against the door. The kiss quickly moves from sweet and chaste, to needy and passionate. Your hands move from his shirt around his neck, fingers running through his silky hair, pulling a soft, muffled grunt from his lungs.

Your lips part and he gives just enough space for you to see his face and the sight turns your already swirling insides into a storm. Wow, did you miss that look he’s giving you, blushing, flustered and messy. You’re sure you look the same. He leans closer again, pressing his heated forehead against yours.

“I’ve… missed you, so much,” he pants. “You have no idea how happy I was to see you.” He kisses you again, his lips moving feverishly.

“I missed you too. So much, you have no idea. I’m so sorry,” you mutter in between each heated kiss. Usahara breaks the kiss to pull you against him again, his arms embracing you and a deep, contented sigh rushing against your ear. Your hands drag down to his chest and you feel his heart beat frantically against your palms. You stay there for a moment until you remember that you’re standing on your doorstep. He moves to kiss you again, but you stop him before he can.

“Want to come inside?” You whisper against his lips, and he smirks.

“I’d like that. We should start making up for lost time.”

highschoolsweetheart!eren continuing his Justin Bieber dance proposal tradition Sophomore year. The first time had gone slightly viral around your school and garnered a few thousand views. His “Baby” performance had become a running joke among your friends, and you couldn’t set foot in the quad without someone teasing, “When’s the next show, y/n?” You would always laugh it off, even though the memory made your heart flutter. There was something undeniably sweet about the way Eren had thrown himself into it, even if he couldn’t quite hit the choreography like Justin did. After all, your best friend was still that goofy kid who could barely pass Phys Ed.

The Spring dance had finally rolled around, with girls being asked with those cute, cheesy posters with creative puns about favorite movies and such. It seemed like there was at least one dance proposal every passing period. You'd watch, an audible 'awee' and smile on your face as you'd walk by. It started to make you wonder if Eren was going to ask you to the dance again. The two of you weren't officially boyfriend/girlfriend. Still just two best friends who had feelings for each other and too afraid to straight up admit it. Pussies.

Still, you wondered if he would ask. Days pass by, no dance proposal. Not one question out of his mouth asking what color dress you were wearing, not one peep about being extra and renting one of those limo's, even if it is just the spring formal. No hints. No teasing. Eren had been unusually quiet the past few days, which was saying something for a guy whose every thought usually tumbled out of his mouth unfiltered. His odd behavior didn’t go unnoticed by your friends, either. “He’s planning something,” Sasha says, mouth full of pizza, nudging you with a grin. “You just know he’s gonna top last year.”

"I don't think he's gonna ask me this year," you sigh, chin in your palm as you look into the distance. It's lunchtime, with you sitting at your usual lunch table. "Usually he teases me about it and makes a whole spectacle, only able to talk about the dance and how cute we're gonna look. But this time? Radio silence."

Sasha squints at you, chewing thoughtfully. “Hmm, that is weird for Eren. The guy’s basically a walking megaphone when it comes to you.” So much for Sasha trying to reassure you, huh.

“I don’t know,” you mumble, poking at your burrito bowl mindlessly. “Maybe he’s just not feeling it this year. Or maybe he’s, like… over it? I mean, it’s not like we’re…together. Maybe he’s moved on.” You hated how your voice cracked a little at the end.

Mikasa, sitting across from you, raises a brow and lets out a soft snort. “Eren? Moving on from you? Not likely.” Now that had got your hopes up again. Maybe a little too up. Mikasa’s words hung in the air, and you tried not to read too much into them. After all, she was Eren’s sister. She’d know if he was up to something…right? But the doubt didn’t go away. You spent the rest of the day trying to distract yourself with schoolwork and gossip, but your mind kept wandering back to Eren and his strange behavior. He had always been loud, animated, and—when it came to you—unapologetically over the top. It wasn’t like him to hold back, and the change was starting to get under your skin.

The rest of the week crawled by at a snail’s pace, and you couldn’t shake the unease settling in your chest. Eren was still around, still Eren, but he felt distant in a way that was unfamiliar. You hated overthinking—it wasn’t like you had any claim to him—but your mind kept spinning with questions you didn’t dare voice out loud.

On Tuesday, you walked into school bracing for another uneventful day. The Spring dance was now just a few days away, and with every cheesy proposal you passed in the halls, your hope dimmed a little more. Maybe Sasha was wrong. Maybe Mikasa was just being her cryptic self. Maybe Eren really wasn’t going to ask you this year.

By lunchtime, you’d all but convinced yourself that Eren wasn’t going to ask you. Eren’s silence, the lack of his usual over-the-top antics—it all settled heavily on your chest. You tried to convince yourself it wasn’t a big deal. Maybe he was just busy, or maybe this was the year he’d decided to keep things low-key. But even as you repeated those excuses in your head, a small voice whispered doubts. Maybe he really wasn’t going to ask you. Maybe he’d gotten bored of the whole thing. Maybe he’d gotten bored of you.

Sasha was the first to call you out. “You’re sulking,” she said bluntly, mouth full of lasagna as she pointed her fork at you. “It’s not a good look, y/n.” yeah, neither is talking with a mouth full of food.

Your head snapped up, cheeks flushing with indignation. “I’m not sulking,” you protested, though the slump of your shoulders and the way you’d been picking at your pasta suggested otherwise. You always swore you didn't give two craps about silly school dances, yet here you were.

“She’s totally sulking,” Ymir chimed in, pulling her sunglasses down to the tip of her nose to get a better view of that sad puppy dog look you wore. She grinned mischievously, clearly relishing in your discomfort. “Don’t worry, y/n. Maybe someone else will ask you. I hear Marco’s still single.” Historia elbows her girlfriend, giving her that look that mothers give their kids when they say stupid things.

The glare you shot her could’ve melted steel. “Gee, thanks, Ymir. That’s exactly what I needed to hear.” You gave the freckled brunette a sarcastic smile, eyes still narrowed in saltiness.

Sasha snickered, and even Mikasa, who rarely involved herself in your drama, let out a quiet huff of amusement. She was sitting across from you, her expression calm and unreadable as always. But there was a faint glimmer in her eyes that suggested she was finding this whole situation mildly entertaining.

“Leave her alone,” Mikasa said, her voice soft but firm. “Eren’s not dumb enough to let this dance go by without asking her.”

Her words hit like a spark of hope, though you were quick to extinguish it. “He’s been acting so weird lately,” you muttered, pushing your food around your tray. “It’s like he doesn’t even care about the dance this year. Usually, by now, he’s already annoying me with ideas for matching outfits or telling me how he's gonna ask the dj to play our favorite song and I better dance with him.”

“Maybe he’s planning something epic,” Sasha suggested, wiggling her eyebrows dramatically. “Like a flash mob or fireworks. You know Eren, he doesn’t do anything halfway.”

You sighed, dropping your chin into your palm. “Or maybe he’s not planning anything at all,” you said, the words tasting bitter on your tongue. “Maybe he’s just… over it. Over me.”

The table went quiet for a moment, and you instantly regretted saying it out loud. You hated how vulnerable it made you feel, like you were exposing a part of yourself you usually kept hidden. Mikasa was the first to break the silence, letting a laugh of a scoff out with her usual passively amused look.

"Are you intentionally being whiny and delusional?" she said, her brow arching slightly as if the idea was utterly laughable. "Eren could never be over you. Not in this lifetime." Her tone was calm, deliberate, and edged with a certainty that should’ve reassured you. But it only made you feel more exposed.

You glanced at her, searching for any sign of sarcasm or teasing, but Mikasa’s expression was as steady and unshakable as ever. She wasn’t the type to say things she didn’t mean, and yet… doubt still lingered in the back of your mind. She was Eren’s sister, after all. If anyone knew what he was up to, it was her. But would she actually tell you if he was planning something? Or would she keep his secrets, leaving you to wallow in uncertainty?

“Whatever,” you mumbled, averting your eyes and resting your forehead against the table. “Can we please not talk about this anymore?”

The conversation reluctantly shifted, though you could feel your friends exchanging knowing glances. Historia began ranting about something Ymir had done the day before, with Ymir trying to defend herself and Sasha laughing so hard she almost falls over, but their voices faded into the background. You nodded when needed, forced a laugh when necessary, but your heart wasn’t in it. All you could think about was Eren—why he’d been so distant lately and why it stung so much that he hadn’t asked you yet.

Finally, it was the end of the school day, and oh were you ready to go home and demolish some ice cream and watch cheesy prom rom coms to ease (or add to) the pain. Dragging your feet through the school parking lot, your eyes are glued to the asphalt as you half listen to Sasha rambling about being a judge for the school's bake off. That is until you hear a commotion.

"What the hell is that?" Sasha points to a crowd, students bunched up making a spectacle of something. Was it a fight? Some kid get too drunk and start puking? Or another stupidly cheesy dance proposal that would make you feel sick/

"What the fuck is everyone looking at?" You hear Ymir shout as her and Historia walk up behind you. All you can do is shrug, getting on your tip toes to try and get a better view.

You squint, trying to see just what the commotion was. "I can't even tell." The crowd is growing, cheers and laughter echoing across the parking lot. A few phones are already out, cameras flashing as everyone jockeys for the best view. You feel your stomach flip—somehow, you already know this has something to do with Eren.

“Y/n, you better get over there,” Mikasa says, nudging your shoulder with a sly smirk that practically screams I know something you don’t. You don't know where the hell she came from, but you listen.

“What?” you ask, though your legs are already moving, curiosity outweighing your hesitation. You weave through the gathering crowd, muttering apologies as you brush past classmates who are grinning and whispering like they’re in on some huge secret.

And then you see it.

Eren dressed in a black tee, silver dog tag around his neck, gray jeans, and white high top air forces. You already know what song he's about to perform just from the outfit alone. It’s classic Eren— in the middle of a makeshift circle trying to channel Justin Bieber’s vibe but somehow making it infinitely more chaotic. Behind him, Jean's truck speakers blasting the unmistakable opening chords of "Love Me.”

Your jaw drops. "Oh my god." Heart fluttering, you smile. Of course Eren didn't move on. Eren grins when he spots you, his green eyes bright and mischievous. He raises a hand dramatically, signaling the crowd to part just enough for him to lock eyes with you.

“Y/n!” he calls out, his voice carrying over the music. This time he has one of those Bluetooth microphones, pink and lighting up with those cheap RGB lights. “This one’s for you!” In classic Eren fashion, he does a high jump off of the back of Jean's truck bed as he belts out the beginning lyrics.

"My friends said I'm a fool to think that you're the one for me. I guess I'm just a sucker for love~"

His hands form a heart in front of his chest as he does a back shuffle, which you see Jean nodding in approval to, his own feet doing the back step in sync. Connie is sitting on the top of Jean's truck, phone in hand as he waves his phone and nods his head along to the beat. He has another microphone, singing the backing vocals.

" 'Cause honestly the truth is that you know I'm never leavin', 'cause you're my angel sent from above"

Eren's points an arm up to the air before doing a backflip, which he lands.... Barely. The landing is a bit sloppy, with him having to take another step to ensure he doesn't trip or fall. The crowd gasps, but shouts when he shows he's okay.

“Oh my god, he’s insane,” you mumble, burying your face in your hands for a second, though you can’t stop peeking between your fingers. This boy will literally risk almost breaking his neck if it would make you smile.

“Insanely in love with you,” Sasha teases, nudging you with her elbow as she laughs.

“Shut up,” you mutter, though you’re barely paying attention to her. Your focus is entirely on Eren as he jumps back onto Jean’s truck bed, spinning in place as he belts out another verse.

"Baby, you can do no wrong. My money is yours, give you a little more because I love ya!"

Money flutters through the air, Eren tossing two handfuls as he sings the line. It rains down, with students rushing to grab it before they look at it with a disappointed groan and dropping it. You pick some bills up, the green paper saying 'Eren Buckz' with a picture of Eren winking in the middle. Just how much effort did this boy put into this? You giggle and stuff the fake money into your binder's clear front sleeve.

"With me, girl is where you belong. Just stay right here, I promise my dear put nothing above ya!"

Suddenly you're scooped into a folding chair. Looking back, you see Armin give you a sheepish smile as he makes sure you're comfortable in the chair. Eren slides off the truck bed, getting on his knees right in front of you and taking your hand, placing a kiss to your knuckles and a cocky wink. He skips back to the middle just as the chorus starts.

"Love me, love me. Say that you love me."

In tandem Eren, Jean, Armin, and Connie do a little choreographed routine. Hands making hearts on their chests, shuffling their feet in that 2010's fashion. You hear Sasha shouting at Connie, calling him the biggest dork although Connie is feeling himself, winking at some girl who's watching. Armin gets along, busy staring at his feet as he sloppily tries to coordinate his moves with the rest of the boys. And Jean, being the one who most definitely put this dance together, is doing this like it's his second nature, never missing a beat and honestly probably stealing all the thunder.

Then Eren starts to do the damn cat daddy and spongebob, somehow doing it with such swagger that you're actually pretty impressed. His feet move with a liquid swiftness, and he pops his imaginary collar just how Justin does.

“I didn’t teach him that move,” Jean mutters, loud enough for you to hear as he shakes his head and facepalms. Although deep down Jean is proud of his friend's dance moves.

"My heart is blind, but I don't care. Cause when I'm with you everything has disappeared. And every time I hold you near, I never wanna let you go."

Eren pulls you up from your seat, taking your binder and setting it down as he twirls you around. A flurry of giggles leaves your lips as you get dizzy. He catches you, dipping you as he looks at you with those dazzling emerald eyes of his. How could you ever doubt that this boy was over you?

Armin and Connie rush behind you two, pulling out a giant banner painted to say, "Tell me what I wanna hear and say yes to the Spring Fling". It was definitely Mikasa's handiwork, being too neat to be Eren's writing.

“Y/n,” he says, voice soft from singing too loud, but his voice still carries over the music. “Will you let me take you to the dance? Because you’re the only one I’d ever make a fool like this for.” He has the cutest grin on his face, so enamored that the moment is solely you two.

The crowd “aww’s” as the song fades into its final beats. Your heart stutters, heat rushing to your face as every eye lands on you. But there’s only one pair of eyes you care about—bright, earnest green, watching you like you’re the only person in the world.

You can't help but smile, your heart beating a million miles a minute as if you were the one doing the insane dance routine. “Only if you promise to never stop being this ridiculous.”

He wraps you in a dramatic hug, lifting you slightly off the ground as the crowd cheers around you. “Deal,” he says, his voice warm and certain. “Wouldn’t know how to stop even if I tried.”

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵ ˚₊₊˚ ‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

Part uno is right hereeee

I literally loveee this series idk why i love high school sweetheart Eren. If y'all have requests, thoughts, head canons send them in so we can swoon over the cutie together. love yalllll

remember how dazai despised the sheep for using chuuya for their own personal gain? remember how he stood up to them by saying that chuuya is capable of making his own decisions? and how he always asks chuuya if he's alright with using corruption even if he already knows the answer?

dazai must be really pissed at the fact that his partner has been turned into a mindless vampire being used as fyodor's trump card

This is the Lucky Ace. Reblog to recieve a wad of cash that is oddly specific to your current needs.

thank you, i'll say goodbye soon

and though it's the end of the world, don't blame yourself

and if it's true, i will surround you

and give life to a world

that's our own

i guess this is my goodbye to the channel. all i can say is - thank you for a fantastic fucking year. i don't know what i would have done without unus annus in my life the way it was, and i will treasure the memories of it forever. the videos themselves, and the community - the memes and art and edits and stories that sprung from this. i love you all with my entire heart, and i know i won't ever forget this messy, wonderful year. so uh... memento vivere. remember you have to live.

More flowers augh :,)

I’ve seen a lot of posts on my dash tonight about users who are threatening suicide, with other Tumblr members posting in effort to try to get ahold of them. I think you all should see this:

IF THERE IS EVER A TUMBLR USER WHO HAS POSTED A GOOD-BYE MESSAGE, SUICIDE NOTE, VIDEO, OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT, PLEASE FOLLOW THIS POST.

1. Scroll to the top of your dashboard.

2. See the circular question mark icon at the top? It’s the third one over from your home symbol. Click on that, and a screen similar to the one in the picture will come up.

3. Where you can type in questions, the box with the magnifying glass at the top, type in the word “suicide.”

4. Click on the first link that shows up. It should say, “Pass the URL of the blog on to us.”

5. Type in the user’s URL and tell Tumblr admin that the user is contemplating suicide and has posted a message indicating that they are going through with it or will be attempting. Hit send! Tumblr administration will perform a number of actions to contact the user and take the necessary steps to prevent the suicide.

TUMBLR: THIS COULD SAVE A USER’S LIFE. PLEASE DO NOT IGNORE SUICIDE THREATS.

Reblog this to keep other users aware. Suicide isn’t a joke, and neither is someone’s life. If you didn’t know this, someone else may not, either. Pass it on.

he’s so 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

it's a little cold today! || idia shroud

winter has started in twisted wonderland, and whatever is idia's is now also yours.

a/n: i wrote this for caelus originally 0-0 didn't get very popular- i'm trying it with idia

word count: 217 words

"you cannot keep doing this," you hear idia dramatically sob outside your (his) door in the rather chilly ignihyde dorm. you opt to focus on the anime on his computer screen. "stealing is a crime! you've already- wait, gimme a sec- stolen my heart, so what use are my extremely expensive and comfy sweaters?!"

"they're comfy! and since we're dating, it's our sweaters now." you yell back as idia flinches and rolls his eyes.

"what kinda logic is that?! give me back my sweaters please!!"he sighs with a soft smile as he opens the door to see you jump onto your (his) bed and burrow deep into your (his) quilts, content with winning the 'argument'. "you mind if i join you? you look real comfy right now."

"comfier than the sweaters?" you ask as you spread your arms wide, idia nodding as he jumped you, burying you underneath him and the blankets. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! IDIA NO, I WANNA BREATHE!"

"you stole my heart, i steal your breath," you hear your blue-haired lover mumble above you, decidedly too comfortable to move and as you moved him over you in a way that didn't hurt your ribs, you whispered a quick cringe-ass fucker, where the hell did you even learn to be so smooth from?, which made him giggle.

recovery (this is gojo lives au)

man, these spot the difference games are getting to be impossible