Yall Ever Experience A Terror Of Like. Using Social Media Incorrectly? I’ll Get Terrified That Im Not

an incomplete list of unsettling short stories I read in textbooks

the scarlet ibis

marigolds

the diamond necklace

the monkey’s paw

the open boat

the lady and the tiger

the minister’s black veil

an occurrence at owl creek bridge

a rose for emily

(I found that one by googling “short story corpse in the house,” first result)

the cask of amontillado

the yellow wallpaper

the most dangerous game

a good man is hard to find

some are well-known, some obscure, some I enjoy as an adult, all made me uncomfortable between the ages of 11-15

add your own weird shit, I wanna be literary and disturbed

standard exam

1. “…and your mother said ‘Happy birthday. I am sorry to inform you that everyone you love is dead’”

Explain, with reference to Sylvia Plath’s first suicide attempt and subsequent admittance to hospital, the relevance of the quote above to your childhood, when, upon seeing the brilliant blue of a butterfly’s wings— (10 marks)

2. Should a poet’s work be

enjambed or read in sequence? Examinees are encouraged to utilise essay structure and one reference to Walt Whitman in their answer. (5 marks)

3.  There’s stardust in our eyes and laughter on our lips,

Over and over again the orchestra plays our last dance:

Amor, amor, amor— (10 marks)

4.  They saw that post you made last night, when you thought they had gone to sleep and you could let the hurt bleed.

Give up. It’s over. You’re over.

A person who has feelings is a ruined person unless they keep their mouth shut - which is exactly what you didn’t do.

(5 marks)

5. I hold stars for the gods, their flashing eyes are nebulae, colours blooming against the universe; their council is the companion of beauty and destruction.  The moirai, with their pale fingers, trace my body, as cold and unfeeling as porcelain, each brush a calculation and every new line a fate thrown into existence. They cut my golden hairs one by one; there is no string of fate, destinies are written in my stars—

(10 marks)

6.  “You trace my scars like you could brush them away and wipe the blood from my mouth as if it would remove the wounds on my lips.” Discuss this statement, with evidence cited from the decline of the relationship between Lucien Carr, Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg to support your conclusion.  (5 marks)

7.  “Now the sky is still heartbreakingly blue. It’s a blue that lovers kiss under, in the cooling summer air, the kind that drags itself across the skin of my body and leaves a trail of goose bumps to hint at its existence. It’s so quiet I can hear the radio playing somewhere. It’s singing about people, and about feelings… feelings about people. It’s warbling words of love and murdering us with words edged like an axe. It’s crooning the song of death.”

Do you agree?  (20 marks)

8. Cassandra was gone long before her death, murmuring words, and words, and words; and her mind falling as Apollo watched her beauty heighten in her madness, and the truth will always be madness, but when she died with screams on her lips, she could not help but be satisfied with her choice, though it may never have been hers, because she cannot be her own person any more than you can stand to keep away from blades, do you understand please do you understand— (10 marks)

9. Is opinion a requirement for literature? Are you? (15 marks)

10.  If, at 5 A.M. on a Monday morning I still haven’t slept and countless cups of coffee have cooled in my hands, but I’m still reaching for your number in my phone even after you told me “never again”:

(i)                 Explain why the French Revolution was an amalgamation of poor leadership, economic troubles and enlightened thinking, making sure to provide sufficient illustration of the dramatic irony and use of paradox used by the authors of the nightmare you had two hours ago every night but never wake from.

(ii)               Draw the colour of your soul.

(10 marks)

—

BONUS QUESTIONS:

Shouldn’t you have learnt by now? (25 marks) Death won’t get an A on your exam. (25 marks) If I don’t exist, how do I know about me? (25 marks) Please? (25 marks) —

All working must be demonstrated. All questions must be answered. Illegibility will be penalised.

-E.C.

“1. “…and your mother said ‘Happy birthday. I am sorry to inform you that everyone you love is dead’” Explain, with reference to Sylvia Plath’s first suicide attempt and subsequent admittance to hospital, the relevance of the quote above to your childhood, when, upon seeing the brilliant blue of a butterfly’s wings—(10 marks) 2. Should a poet’s work be enjambed or read in sequence? Examinees are encouraged to utilise essay structure and one reference to Walt Whitman in their answer.(5 marks) 3. There’s stardust in our eyes and laughter on our lips, Over and over again the orchestra plays our last dance: Amor, amor, amor—(10 marks) 4. They saw that post you made last night, when you thought they had gone to sleep and you could let the hurt bleed. Give up. It’s over. You’re over. A person who has feelings is a ruined person unless they keep their mouth shut - which is exactly what you didn’t do. (5 marks) 5. I hold stars for the gods, their flashing eyes are nebulae, colours blooming against the universe; their council is the companion of beauty and destruction. The moirai, with their pale fingers, trace my body, as cold and unfeeling as porcelain, each brush a calculation and every new line a fate thrown into existence. They cut my golden hairs one by one; there is no string of fate, destinies are written in my stars— (10 marks) 6. “You trace my scars like you could brush them away and wipe the blood from my mouth as if it would remove the wounds on my lips.” Discuss this statement, with evidence cited from the decline of the relationship between Lucien Carr, Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg to support your conclusion. (5 marks) 7. “Now the sky is still heartbreakingly blue. It’s a blue that lovers kiss under, in the cooling summer air, the kind that drags itself across the skin of my body and leaves a trail of goose bumps to hint at its existence. It’s so quiet I can hear the radio playing somewhere. It’s singing about people, and about feelings… feelings about people. It’s warbling words of love and murdering us with words edged like an axe. It’s crooning the song of death.” Do you agree? (20 marks) 8.Cassandra was gone long before her death, murmuring words, and words, and words; and her mind falling as Apollo watched her beauty heighten in her madness, and the truth will always be madness, but when she died with screams on her lips, she could not help but be satisfied with her choice, though it may never have been hers, because she cannot be her own person any more than you can stand to keep away from blades, do you understand please do you understand—(10 marks) 9. Is opinion a requirement for literature? Are you? (15 marks) 10. If, at 5 A.M. on a Monday morning I still haven’t slept and countless cups of coffee have cooled in my hands, but I’m still reaching for your number in my phone even after you told me “never again”: (i) Explain why the French Revolution was an amalgamation of poor leadership, economic troubles and enlightened thinking, making sure to provide sufficient illustration of the dramatic irony and use of paradox used by the authors of the nightmare you had two hours ago every night but never wake from. (ii) Draw the colour of your soul. (10 marks) — BONUS QUESTIONS: Shouldn’t you have learnt by now? (25 marks) Death won’t get an A on your exam. (25 marks) If I don’t exist, how do I know about me? (25 marks)Please? (25 marks) — All working must be demonstrated. All questions must be answered. Illegibility will be penalised.”

— standard exam, E.C.

Geological horror. You find a geode and crack it open and the crystal lining its walls is human blood that can't be genetically matched to anyone. You find a human skeleton but every one of the bones is made from rock, a rock that you know can't be whittled into those shapes. You find layers of clay and loam that sport ancient fossils at the top and the still-rotting corpses of modern animals at the bottom.

reminders for today:

if you or someone you know might need it in the next few years, purchase plan b. the shelf life of plan b is 4 years, and we might not be able to access it as easily as we can now in the days ahead.

if you are larger/plus size: go online and purchase ella instead of plan b. plan b is less effective if you aren’t under 160 pounds.

if you can, purchase books that project 2025 is looking to ban.

mass deportations are starting. if you see ice vehicles or agents, yell ice raid and la migra as loud as you can.

if someone asks who you voted for, keep your mouth shut. they’re fishing for traitors.

if anyone, anyone at all asks about your neighbors or their legal status in the us, you know nothing. don’t be the reason that their family is separated.

if anyone asks about your religion or lack thereof, keep it vague. this administration will look for any excuse to persecute you.

your friends are trans or queer? for the next four years they’re not. don’t expose anyone’s status as a trans or queer person to anyone else, even if you think you can trust them.

did someone you know get an abortion? no, they didn’t. they were never pregnant.

in short, don’t be a snitch, and keep to yourself these next four years. we’ll make it through this even if it seems hopeless at times.

we can survive this. we’ve survived before, and we’ll survive again.

the thing about being nonbinary is that you really do start to forget that other people have such strict walls around what is and isn’t allowed for genders. i thought we all agreed that we made that up. could you climb out of the cave real quick and feel the sunshine for a minute.

hello fellow non-Black tumblr users. welcome to my saw trap. if you'd like to leave, please name one (1) Black woman author who is not Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison, bell hooks, Octavia Butler, or N.K. Jemisin. bonus points if she's published a book in the last five years.

stop instinctively calling people dude/bro/guy if you’re aware some people are made uncomfortable

your instincts are serving to harm your community and your defense of them as being applied equally feels like a cope when asked to confront your own androcentric bias. You should confront your bias without making these excuses, asking isn’t more considerate than adjusting your speech patterns.

i’m sorry that my comment made you upset, i was not trying to defend anything unsavory. i was giving an example of how i go about ensuring i am using language that makes the people i meet feel comfortable. allow me to explain my reasoning:

when i meet a new person that i am going to be around a lot, and i ask them about wether or not it’s okay to use dude and bro, i do this to try to personalize the language i use around that person to help them feel comfortable. i see this as being equivalent to asking what their pronouns are, or if they are sensitive to curse words, or if there are topics that they become uncomfortable around discussion of, like, for example, discussion of insects. i am actively taking an interest in their comfort.

i adjust my speech patterns from person to person based on what makes them happiest. that’s why i ask questions like “is dude okay? if it’s not that’s fine, i just always ask when i meet someone new.” if this was a stupid question to ask then i wouldn’t ask it and assume a “no,” but the thing is that of all the people in my life, only one person that i’ve asked has ever told me that it was not okay with the use of dude and bro. and i was fine with it, and we actually brainstormed other informal terms i could use when referring to it and all was well in the world. we were happy and it thanked me for checking.

i don’t intend to fully amputate a piece of myself when i can just as easily take the steps to preemptively check with those around me and put some beloved words away as needed. not everybody wants to hear bro. not everybody wants to hear fuck. and yet i am not psychic and cannot know who feels what way about which words unless i ask.

anyways, sorry that was long, but this is why i ask that question. now, if i may give you a little critique in return, saying that when quote “some people are made uncomfortable” with a word means that it should be permanently struck from my lexicon is wild. if i were to, as a blanket, avoid the use of every word that some people happen to dislike, then i would never be saying anything at all. of course the key word is “some.” if “some” is “most” then the word is gone. bye bye. but to believe we need to censor every word that some people happen to personally dislike is crazy work.

(just as a little disclaimer in case i didn’t make it clear, i say this about words like “shit” or “girliepop” or “moist”. not words with a harmful history, like slurs)

every time i remember this video exists im not even exaggerating when i say i wheeze until i cant breathe its the fuckijgn funniest thing in thw world to me it gives me a migraine every time i watch it

Me, watching my kitten hold still for a suspiciously long time: Ollie, are you peeing on my floor?

Ollie: Not

Me: Are you sure?

Ollie, grunting through time and space to push out a chocolate mcmuffin wider than he is tall: Not

See also, "We're in a drought; conserve water!" Meanwhile, bottled water companies and golf courses for rich folk empty the aquifers.