Ai Is Making People Way Too Comfortable With Being Incompetent Stupid And Useless… Go Learn Some Skills

mechanic!simon riley headcanons

mechanic!simon riley who swore he fell in love with you the minute you walked in the shop, your eyes wide but your expression serious. his usual customers are on the older side and always men who are too insufficient to fix a car on their own, so you were the perfect change of pace.

mechanic!simon riley who knew as a woman you were highly likely to get ripped off by other mechanics, so he was glad you came to his shop. he makes sure to offer you water and some light snacks. he doesn't do that with his other customers, but you're an exception.

mechanic!simon riley who thought it was hot when you got straight to the point before he could even introduce himself. you already diagnosed your car before you came because like simon, you knew how you could get scammed in repair shops. you nodded when he asked if you knew a lot about cars and he replied with, "a woman after my own heart."

mechanic!simon riley who is already wearing a short-sleeved t-shirt, but rolls up the sleeves to his shoulders so you could get a view of just how huge his biceps were. it doesn't help your temptation when you see that his tattoo sleeve in fact does continue up until his shoulder.

mechanic!simon riley who on purpose makes sure his t-shirt lifts a little bit higher than usual while he's working on your undercarriage. he's lying down under the car, and makes sure to extend his arms higher so he can tease the gorgeous combination that is his happy trail, abs, and v-line to you.

mechanic!simon riley who drains the oil in your car on purpose while he's working on it just enough so that you have to come back a second time and so that he has an excuse to see your gorgeous self again.

mechanic!simon riley who doesn't let you pay for any of the repairs you needed. he reasoned with you saying you had enough trouble driving the car to the shop as it was, and doesn't want to add on to it.

(idk)

i love the fact that girlies will write the filthiest, most depraved smut about dark, intimidating and tattooed men—with fluffy bunnies, sparkling little stars and pretty bows as banners. oh, and soft pink as a colour accent on certain words.

Me after reading the most profane, toe curling, mind blowing smut known to man in the middle of class because I was bored

soft sex with simon riley

with a life as rough as simon's, he needs a sweet bird like you to come home to. soft and pliant under his calloused hands, his body weight pressing you further into the plush mattress.

you were so sweet to him, with warm food already cooking on the stove and a bathtub filled with warm water. your soft hands gentle in comparison to his rough ones as you caressed his face, washing the dirt and grime, fingertips smudging away the black around his eyes.

nails scratching through his short blond hair as his lashes fluttered, eyes waning shut with a low hum escaping his lips. content, a feeling simon rarely expressed, especially when he was in solitude.

but under the hands of his bird, all the tension seemed to dissipate from his skin as he let you work your hands over his face and body, scrubbing him clean back to the simon you knew.

he had to return the favor though. you were patient, caring and loving, the least he could do was treat you nicely as he lazily fucked himself into your achy cunt. his hips were languid, lips all over your skin. he kissed every inch of you as you lay bare for him, skin coated in a thin layer of sweat, trails of saliva. he thumbed over your needy pearl, satiating his need for you as he indulged in your cunt all night.

this struck something in me

The room is dimly lit, as it always is when you have sex with Simon. Shadows dance along the walls as he drives into you with unrelenting precision. Your back arches off the bed, lips parting in whimpers as his thick, throbbing cock hits that devastating spot deep inside you over and over. His hands grip you firmly, grounding you as your vision blurs, your body trembling under the sheer intensity of him. The air between you is electric—raw and consuming.

But then, just as you’re both caught in the heat of it, his low, gravelly voice rumbles softly against your ear.

"Y’know," he mutters, deadpan, "if I keep fuckin' ya this good, reckon y'might end up snorin' as loud as y'did last night."

You freeze for half a second, your brain short-circuiting before a laugh bursts out of you, completely unbidden. You try to hold it in, but it’s no use—you’re shaking with laughter, gasping for breath as Simon's thrusts slow to halt, watching you with the faintest glint of amusement in his eyes.

You manage to choke out between giggles, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

He doesn’t respond immediately, just tilts his head with a dry, unimpressed look, though the tiniest smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth. "Just making conversation," he says plainly, as if he hasn’t just shattered the mood entirely.

"Still with me?" he asks, his deep voice a low rumble as his hand cradles your cheek, thumb brushing softly against your skin. You manage a nod, your breath shaky, and a flicker of satisfaction crosses his face.

"Good," he murmurs, his lips ghosting over yours. "Now behave."

The words barely register before he thrusts into you again, slow and deliberate, pulling a gasp from your lips as your vision blurs, the intensity making your legs quiver.

mlist | @machveil thanks for the inspo

simon ghost riley listening to let down by radiohead on repeat after you pass away.

simon ghost riley can often be found resting upon your lap, rugged, scratchy with prickling, patchy stubble face nudges in the doughy surface of your supple thighs, open by some short sleeping shorts you wear around the house, or nothing at all, just a pair of panties that barely separate him from where he tries to burrow in, concealed only by the loose shirt that is draped over your body and crumples between your legs.

nuzzling in like a domesticated cat, focused on getting where he wants to go, brazen, demanding, calloused, short nailed fingers dig in and knead on the sensitive flesh of your thighs, leaving hollows and making you flinch, coating with goosebumps, making you clench your own fingers in the short hairs on the nape of his neck, previously tangled there to scratch at his scalp, now trying to tug him away, even though the displeased grumble coming through his chest, and the forceful grip he keeps on your legs.

simon just needs it, not to only lay with his head on your thighs and enjoy the caress of your fingers over his hair and face, nails raking down slow over the sensitive skin of his mug, the tissued feeling of scars and faded blemishes that were left by wearing a suffocating balaclava too often, but it's not enough, there's a gut wounding, aching need to be close to the most intimate part of your body, crawl in somewhere between your ribs, but the only thing he can do that is somewhat close, burrow his nose against your clothed cunt, jaw stretching to accommodate his wide opening mouth, just to inhale the telltale note of your building arousal, the musk of your sweet pussy.

and you can't say him no, not with how persistently his tongue lolls out to wet the slowly drenching fabric of your underwear, his crooked nose pressed just right against the twitchy, swelling nub of your pebbled clit, searing hot and seeming to twitch at the proximity, sending spasms down your bowing spine and flexing, curling toes, as your part your legs for him, feeling the heavy press of his brawny, full chest against your tensing thigh, as he hums lowly, before sucking on your mound through the fabric, burying down in earnest.

it's quite charming, how eager simon is to fuck his tongue in your mouth and swallow down mouthfull of your honey syrupy slick, dripping eagerly on his twisting, curling tongue and relaxed throat, letting him gulp down each drop, until he grows tired, perhaps drowsy, weighted by the exhausted weeks, contented to be squished down between your legs.

main masterlist. quidelines.

MDNI 18+

mentions of: oral sex (m) receiving, thumb sucking

oral sex with simon riley is absolutely filthy, dirty all around with spit, cum and tears. simon knew that he was a big guy, his cock heavy in his hands as he gave it a few hasty pumps, the roughness of his hands on his aching cock making him hiss slightly. his free hand tugging the back of your head, allowing him gently rubbing his leaking head over your plush lips, making them glisten with his precum. “give it yer all yeah? slobber all of it luvie.”

simon wasn’t a patient guy, roughly shoving his cock in fully with no warning making you gag as his fat tip hits the back of your throat. he was addicted to the way your warm mouth felt, your tongue swirling around his sensitive head. your mouth was stretched out to accomodate his girth, your jaw slightly sore before he pushed your head fully down, your nose nestled in between his messy pubes.

he had one criteria for blow jobs, you needed to be an absolute mess after.

wet squelching sounds filled the room as you drooled all over his cock, making a mess on your hands as it dribbled down the corners of your mouth then to your chin. “remember to breathe luvie, can’t have yer passin’ out on me.”

he fucked your mouth like it was your cunt, two of his large scarred hands fisting your hair forcing you to take his cock fully, a guttural groan leaving his lips. when he would come he wouldn’t stop, forcing you to mix your saliva with his cum as it dribbled down your chin, the clear liquid slightly milky now. “such a pretty girl makin’ a mess on me cock, havin’ fun luvie?” he cooed as he panted, his chest rising whilst beads of sweat were on his forehead.

roughly, he pulled his cock out, a loud ‘pop’ leaving your swollen lips as he did with a string of saliva that connected from his pinkish swollen head to your glossy lips. “such a good girl.” he praised lowly as he rubbed your lips with his thumb, before slipping it in. instinctively you sucked on it, your tongue swirling as he shoved it deeper.

“ yer have an oral fixation bun?”

his gaze dropped down to your neck and chest, the milky liquid now seeping in between your breasts. he raised a hand to gently smear it across your breasts, your skin glistening with the sticky liquid as simon made a silent claim. “might have to fuck yer tits if they look so pretty like that.” his voice low as he brought his hand covered with your saliva and his cum to your face, before smearing it on your cheeks. the sticky liquid coated your skin before simon gently ran it through your hair, making some parts clumped together.

“give me a big smile luvie.”

as you closed your eyes, a big toothy grin on your face tilted up, simon messily fisted his cock, sloppy wet sounds filling the room before he came all over your face. your lashes slightly glued and clumped together as he coated your face.

sweet!simon | sex and other things

as you may notice, i'm lowkey done with capitals when i type they're just so so inconvenient and DISRUPT MY FLOW (unless i wanna get my point across like that) enjoy!

warnings: virgin!reader, simon actually being…sweet?, f!oral receiving, sex and other things (duh read the title)

word count: 0.6k

it's slow at first. deliberate.

he's got you spread out on your bed and by the look in his eyes, he's been starved for this. looking at you through low eyes like you're something so rare, laid out all nicely just for him. big hands on your thighs, thumbs stroking over your skin in a comforting way. like he can't believe you're real.

"been thinking about this for so long," he mumbles, voice rough and quiet. "thinking about how sweet you'd taste."

your breath stutters. he smirks that goddamn smirk, because he knows alright. he knows exactly what he's doing to you.

and then, finally, his mouth is on you. and it's devastating.

slow, wet, messy.

he's not shy about it at ALL. tongue working you open like he's got nowhere else to be. this is basically what he believes to be his purpose in life. to please you. every little noise you make just makes him groan even deeper into you, like he lives for the sound of your pleasure.

"fuck..." he murmurs against your core, voice shattered, "all of this for me, pretty girl?" he praises you, managing to pull a physical reaction out of you as you feel yourself dripping, leaking in arousal all over his lower face.

your hands find his hair without even thinking, tugging a little, and he loves it, groaning into you like it's the hottest thing you could've done. he grabs at your thighs when they start to tremble, spreading you wider and pulling you closer like he needs more.

it's absolutely filthy and he's obsessed.

he doesn't stop until you ride out your orgasm on his face, his grip on your thighs helping you to push through the intensity of it.

and after? you'd be lying there still catching your breath after this absolute MUNCH just ate you out with no mercy whatsoever, your legs still shaking a little, chest rising and falling. and he would just look at you with a stupid smirk like he's so fucking proud of himself. as if you looking spent was his most favourite view ever.

he would probably wipe his mouth with the back of his hand, but he'd still be grinning. maybe he even says something like "tastes so fucking good. knew you would." like it's nothing.

and then... he's already getting rid of his clothes - unbothered, hard as hell, dick literally leaking because he's been so into it. he's wanted to fuck you from the second he touched you but he was patient about it.

but now? after that? he has no patience left. it's non-exsistant.

he would definitely grab your face while kissing you messily, so turned on by the fact that you can taste yourself on his mouth. groaning into it, mumbling promises like "gonna fuck you so good, baby. gonna feel so good."

and when he finally pushes into you...? oh hellll you're done for.

the mix of low moans and gasps from him and whimpers from you make the moment so so perfect. him holding you hips, telling you "that's it. atta girl, jus' like that. taking me s'well."

he'd be such a praiser too. "my pretty girl. so fucking perfect f'me."

the sex would be slow at first, he needs to make sure it feels good for you before he focuses on his own needs and wants, but it wouldn't take too long before he's fucking into you like he can't help it. whispering filthy little things embellished with praise into your ear between kisses. staring into your eyes as he fucks you so good, watching you fall apart on him.

gosshhh im combusting at this thought rn...

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