every software is like. your mission-critical app requires you to use the scrimble protocol to squeeb some snorble files for sprongle expressions. do you use:
libsnorble-2-dev, a C library that the author only distributes as source code and therefore must be compiled from source using CMake
Squeeb.js, which sort of has most of the features you want, but requires about a gigabyte of Node dependencies and has only been in development for eight months and has 4.7k open issues on Github
Squeeh.js, a typosquatting trojan that uses your GPU to mine crypto if you install it by mistake
Sprongloxide, a Rust crate beloved by its fanatical userbase, which has been in version 0.9.* for about four years, and is actually just a thin wrapper for libsnorble-2-dev
GNU Scrimble, a GPLv3-licensed command-line tool maintained by the Free Software Foundation, which has over a hundred different flags, and also comes with an integrated Lisp interpreter for scripting, and also a TUI-based Pong implementation as an "easter egg", and also supports CSV, XML, JSON, PDF, XLSX, and even HTML files, but does not actually come with support for squeebing snorble files for ideological reasons. it does have a boomeresque drawing of a grinning meerkat as its logo, though
Microsoft Scrimble Framework Core, a .NET library that has all the features you need and more, but costs $399 anually and comes with a proprietary licensing agreement that grants Microsoft the right to tattoo advertisements on the inside of your eyelids
snorblite, a full-featured Perl module which is entirely developed and maintained by a single guy who is completely insane and constantly makes blog posts about how much he hates the ATF and the "woke mind-virus", but everyone uses it because it has all the features you need and is distributed under the MIT license
Google Squeebular (deprecated since 2017)
its like they love each other or smth
dabi and dumbification đ€ - mdni
he likes how smart you are, actually prefers you a little mean, but nothing, absolutely nothing, turns him on like watching his smart girl go stupid on his dick
actually lives for the moment when he witnesses your mind go slack and give in to himâheâs big on control and trust, so knowing that youâre essentially putting your whole person in his hands is everything to him
âaww, you like being my little cocksleeve, donât ya sweet thing?â he snarls, teeth against your neck, one hand hot on your hip. âno oneâs ever fucked the words right outta that pretty mouth, I can tellâ
loves the feeling of overpowering you so completely that heâs overwriting your very senses. youâre babbling out his name, tears pricking your eyes at the press of pleasure/pain swirling in your gut. hell, you canât even beg him anymore, youâre so far goneâ
âfuck, this slutty little pussyâs squeezinâ me so tight.â smacks your ass as he bullies his cock into you, smirks at the fucked-out whine that falls from your lips. âbet I can get another one out of you, huh baby? you still know how?â said with that infuriating smirk on his face
edges himself the entire time heâs making you cum
âwhere do you want it? here?â feral grin on his face while pressing down on your lower stomach, your frantic little nod bobbing up and down. âwho am I to deny you?â
probably receives noise complaints from every lov member
nearly every time you get out of the shower, shouto somehow hears you uncap your lotion from across the house and suddenly manifests in the bathroom with you, pouting until you let him help put it on
part one
the music was loud. too loud. bass-heavy beats rattled the walls, drowning out drunken conversations and the occasional, ear-splitting whoo! from someone whoâd had one too many shots. the house was packed, every square inch filled with people who werenât you.
and yet, katsuki saw only you.
leaning against the kitchen counter, drink in hand, your head tilted back as you laughed at something some random asshole said. katsuki barely registered the guyâs face. all he saw was the way your smile stretched wide, the way your hand rested lightly on the counter, the way you werenât paying attention to him.
his grip on his own cup tightened.
eijiro had ditched him ages ago, somewhere between his third beer and his âdude, i gotta check on my little sister.â which meant you were supposed to be under watch. which meant you shouldnât be standing here, giggling at some nobody like you didnât have a six-foot, red-haired menace for a brother who was ready to kick some ass.
âoff limits, dude.â
bullshit.
katsuki wasnât the type to step in unless absolutely necessary. but this? this was necessary.
he stormed over, his presence sucking the air from the room the second he got close. the guy talking to you faltered mid-sentence, side-eyeing katsuki like heâd just realized heâd been trespassing.
âohâuh... hey, man, whatâs up?â
âscram.â
the guy blinked.
âwhat?â
katsuki took another step forward, eyes glinting under the dim, neon glow of the kitchen lights.
âyou deaf? i said scram.â
he didnât have to say it twice.
you rolled your eyes as your partner scurried off, not wanting to test his luck against bakugou katsuki.
âreally?â you sighed, crossing your arms. âwas that necessary?â
âyou tell me,â katsuki muttered, his eyes flicking over you, lingering on your lips that have stopped smiling.
you looked too damn good tonight. soft, glowing skin, a dress that hugged your curves, hair falling over your shoulders like you were some kind of problem sent to ruin him.
his jaw clenched.
âhe was totally harmless,â you continued, sipping your drink. ânot that itâs any of your business.â
his business?
katsuki narrowed his eyes, stepping closer, close enough that you had to tilt your chin up to keep eye contact.
âthe hell it ainât,â he muttered.
he expected you to shove him, roll your eyes, call him dramatic. instead, you just looked at him like you were finally seeing the way his fists clenched at his sides. the way his breath hitched when you leaned in, just slightly, your voice dropping to something sweeter.
âoh?â you tilted your head, lips curving mischievously. âthen what is it to you, katsuki?â
fuck.
there always seemed to be something so dangerous about having his name on your lips. it made his head spin and something hot and restless coil in his stomach.
this was bad.
he exhaled, forcing his gaze away, forcing himself to move before he did something stupid.
like kiss you.
âeijiroâs looking for you,â he muttered, turning on his heel. âget your ass back to him before he starts losing his shit.â
he didnât wait for your reaction. didnât stick around to see the way your brows furrowed or how you chewed on your lip like you were holding something back.
he just walked away with his fists clenched yet again.
off limits, my ass.
© 2025 shinig6mis | do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my work.
when his favorite bartender finally decides to message him
THE CUT THAT ALWAYS BLEEDS
Keigo Takami is in love with you, and you don't love him back
Hanahaki disease, angst, fluff, workplace romance
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Keigo starts his morning the same way he has for the past two months, by coughing up a handful of bloody petals.
It splatters against the pure white of his toilet bowl, and he watches, knees digging into the floor and hands grasping the lid as they wash away, the water turning pink as the red petals disappear. Itâs disgusting, really, the way heâs sprawled on the toilet floor, and on any other day he wouldnât even consider touching the lid of any toilet, even his. But he doesnât care, because the pain in his chest is aching, and his lungs burn as tries to breathe in, and Keigo cannot stop thinking about you.
The first time heâd coughed up a petal, it was after a week of pain. He thought it might just be the flu, or some other illness heâd caught from flying around in the cold winter winds. But then one night it had reached its peak, and Keigo was in slight disbelief at the red rose remains in his hand after heâd coughed his lungs out. It was small and bloody. He didnât know what to think of it, so he didnât. Maybe he swallowed something when he was flying, who knows. It wasnât anything to worry about, he decided.
And then it happened again. And again. And itâs been happening ever since, now two months later, only getting worse and worse as the days go by. It was only after a week that he looked up his symptoms, the flowers and the blood and the constant pain in his chest, and the internet said there was only one thing it could be.Â
Hanahaki disease. It originated in Japan, apparently, and was rare, but real. Keigo skipped past all the useless information to find what he really needed. He found itâs a disease where someone coughs up flowers due to unrequited feelings for somebody. And he knew, the minute he read those words, that his unrequited feelings were for you.
Keigo had never loved anyone in his life. Not his parents, for obvious reasons, and his training at the Hero commission had meant that he had no time for it anywhere else. Not that there was anybody in there to love, anyway. And now, as a Pro hero with his own agency, he didnât want love. It complicated things, and he was in no position for a relationship anyway. He barely had time for himself, so how could he deal with a relationship? So Keigo filled the empty parts of himself with meaningless sex with whoever he found. At parties, at award evenings. It was just the physicality of it, skin on his own. He craved it and got it where he could. It pissed his publicist to no end, but they usually kept quiet, and scandals always did good for the agency.Â
And then he met you.
His assistant had quit. Something about better opportunities, work closer to home. He had flashed her his best smile, sent flowers to her home, and waited dutifully in his office for you to walk in the next day. And you did, perfectly pressed shirt and black skirt, smiling so sweetly at him and introducing yourself, and he knew it was over.Â
Itâs not his fault. What couldnât he love about you? You were funny, you were kind. You brought him breakfast every morning and started leaving a pillow and a blanket in his office when you knew heâd come off a night shift. You actually spoke to him like he was a person, not Hawks, not the Number two hero. It didnât take long for the feelings to start but he thought he was pushing them down well enough.
These flowers tell him heâs not.Â
He flirts with you, and the two of you joke around, but nothing ever comes of it because he knows you donât like him back. And even if you did, Keigo would never do you the horrible favour of burdening you with loving somebody like him.
Keigo sighs, pushing himself gingerly to his feet. He clears his throat and it stings from the acidity of throwing up. He moves on autopilot, shrugging on his coat and typing the laces on his boots. His mind races with thoughts of you, of how long he has left. The final stages are apparently whole flowers and he ignores the voice in the back of his mind that says judging by what he just coughed up, heâs getting dangerously close to the end.
The weather outside is cold and bitter. Keigo hates winter, hates how he has to bundle to avoid the sharp, piercing wind whenever he flies. Itâs harder to patrol in the dark and youâre less likely to leave the agency for your lunch break, so it also means he canât use it as an excuse to take you out. He steps out on his balcony, sliding the door behind him, and he shuts his eyes.
Sometimes he thinks in another life, heâd tell you. In another life maybe he was just an assistant like you, someone normal, someone you deserved. That after his shift heâd get to come home and youâd have cooked dinner or heâd bring home takeout. He craves normalcy, to have a home with someone, and he canât help but dream itâs with you.
He slips his goggles on and pulls up the gaiter around his neck. He steps forward and with one strong flap of his wings heâs in the air.Â
The flight to the agency doesnât take long. Nothing really does, to be honest. Heâs not patrolling today but he still keeps an eye on the ground, the sky still dark as the world wakes up around him. He lands deftly in his own office, and the wide windows being pushed open already lets him know youâre in the building too. He runs a hand through his hair, quickly checking his reflection to make sure he looks good. He does, obviously, but he canât help but worry. Thereâs a familiar knock on his door, and you donât wait for him to let you in before you enter.
Today, youâre wearing a long pair of trousers that hug your legs, the white blouse you have on buttoned up apart from the top two, a small sliver of skin exposed to show a small gold necklace he got for you at a Christmas party, holding two coffees.
His heart pounds and he coughs into his sleeve. Your eyebrows furrow and you step forward, empty hand reaching out.
âAre you okay, Hawks?â You ask, and he nods.
He clears his throat, swallowing away the feeling prickling it. He nods, flashing you a toothy grin. âYeah, now that youâre here.â
You roll your eyes but he doesnât miss the small smile on your face as you set his drink down on the table. He takes a long drink of it and you wince.
âGod, I donât know how you drink that. Itâs more sugar than coffee.â You scrunch your nose and he shrugs.
âI need the energy, babe, you know that. All that flying around burns calories quickly.â
One of his feathers shuts the window, another two hanging up his coat. Your eyes follow quickly. He might be trying to impress you a little, but itâs been a long enough time of you watching this show that heâs sure it doesnât do much. The skin tight thermal might, though. He may or may not be flexing a little when he stretches, but he doesnât see any harm in that.Â
You nod, pulling out your phone, eyes quickly averting away from him. âOkay, so. Luckily for you, today is just paperwork. No energy necessary.â You sigh, sitting down heavily. âI hate paperwork days.â
He knows exactly why. The long, tired hours of writing and reading. Anyone would hate it, but Keigo? Keigo loves paperwork days. A whole day with the two of you in a room? What couldnât he love about that?
He sits down across from you. It feels a little weird, too formal, with you across his desk. He doesnât use it much. His office is pretty empty. There's no decorations, no plants, nothing. It's empty because Keigo doesnât care. He doesnât like this office. The only thing he likes about it is that itâs the place he spends the most time with you. He wishes you were closer.
He coughs. There's a familiar feeling itching in his lungs and he begs to a God he doesnât know that he wonât throw up flowers in front of you.
âAw, come on. Paper days are fine. And Iâll order food for us later.â
You perk up at that. âReally? Letâs get yakitori.â
âAnd this is why I love you.â He coughs again and you peer at him.
âAre you okay? You keep coughing today.â
He nods. âDonât worry about it, babe, Iâm good.â
You keep looking at him. âIf youâre sick, go home.â
âNo, Iâm fine. The number two hero doesnât get sick.â
You donât look convinced but you hold up the first set of papers. His fingers brush against yours as he grabs them. The two of you sit in silence for all of five minutes before Keigo groans. You look up, amused.
âIâm bored.â
You sigh. âMe too. But as your assistant I have to tell you to keep going.â
Keigo pouts. You tap the pen in your hand against the desk.
âNo way to get out of this?â He says. âNope.â
âNo work parties I can look forward to?â
You shake your head. Then you sit up suddenly. âWait. Oh my god.â
Keigo sits up too, immediately mirroring your panic. His wings curl out behind him. You cover your face with your hands.
âWhat? Youâre freaking me out, Y/N.â
âThere is a work party! Tonight. That Iâm supposed to be planning. And I completely forgot!â You groan.
Oh. Thatâs easier to deal with. âItâs fine, donâât worry. Weâll sort it.â You shake your head and it ruffles your hair, and he wishes he could reach forward and brush it behind your ear. âNo, I don't know what to do. Itâs for Kayleeâs birthday! Everyone loves Kaylee, I love Kaylee, thatâs why I offered to plan this for her.â You ramble.
Keigo catches most of your babble. He quickly moves off from behind his desk to stand in front of you, his hands coming to rest at your shoulders. âBreathe, girl.â
You do, chest moving up and down slowly. Like this, with you still seated and him standing, he towers over you. He thinks for a moment.
âLetâs just go now.â
âWhat?â
âWeâll just go get the stuff you need right now. Shouldn't be too much, right?â
Your eyes glance at the paperwork on the desk. âWhat about all that?â
He hums, and you look up at him again. This close, Keigo can see you so much clearer, so much brighter. Another cough rumbles in his chest and he ignores it. âWe can do it another day. Blame it on me.â
You bite at your bottom lip, considering his offer. You stand up and nod, determined.
âOkay. Okay, let me get my coat. Iâll meet you at the front desk.â
And then youâre out before he can say another word.
â----------
Keigo thinks this is torture. Real, honest to God torture.
Youâd refused his offer to fly to the marketplace, so now the two of you were just walking down the street. Heâd left his feathers at work, and changed into the most civilian outfit in the agency. It always felt weird without them on his back, the heavy weight something heâd been used to since he was born. But for you, Keigo thinks he might set them all on fire.Â
What makes everything worse is that youâre walking with your arm linked in his. You had been since youâd walked out the agency, animatedly talking and pointing at the things around you. It was hard to focus on much when your fingers squeezed his bicep every time you saw something you liked.Â
âOkay, so. I need a cake, and decorations. And like, snack food.â
He nods. âYes, maâam. Can we squeeze lunch in there?â
âThereâs always time for lunch, Hawks.âÂ
The first stop the two of you end up at is a supermarket. You pass him a coin to grab a shopping cart and he immediately starts running around with it, and you tut.
âHawks, enough. People are looking.â
Your words should sound annoyed, but thereâs a soft fondness behind them that has his head reeling. You take the cart from his hands and he lets you walk ahead, because the feeling that heâs started to dread builds in his torso, and he grabs the tissue out of his pocket and he coughs.
Itâs loud and grating and it scratches the back of his throat. Heâs lucky that thereâs nobody around to see him gag into his hand, the petals tickling as he spits, blood splattering against it. He breathes heavily, once, twice, and tears prick at his eyes. He curses, eyes screwed shut. Not today, not like this. Not when he finally has a day alone with you. He throws the tissue in the trash outside the shop, and goes in to find you.
He finds that grocery shopping is fun. Heâs never actually been before. His groceries are kindly delivered by the Commission straight to his front door, so heâs never actually done this before. Itâs exciting. He likes the little line you get between your eyebrows whenever you get annoyed at him for putting random things in the basket.
âHawks, enough! We donât need six loaves of bread!â
âWe do! We can make those little hors dâoeuvres with like, pesto on them.â
You mumble some choice words under your breath, putting them all back. âHawks, this isnât some Hero commission party. Weâre getting a bag of Doritos and dip and calling it a day.â
Keigo pouts and you drag him over to the basket. âHere, you push this.â
You take him to the produce aisle and he boos as your throw in a few vegetables sticks. Keigo gags again, holding up the celery sticks. You snatch them out his hand and toss them back in the car.
âStop. We need something healthy so we can eat a carrot stick and feel good about the cake Iâm going to buy.â You tap your head knowingly and he grins.
âI donât look healthy enough as is?â He stretches out his arm and the windblower youâd found for him in the agency billows around his arms.
You snort, patting him on the chest. âOh, yeah. You look great.âÂ
It leaves him winded, just for a second, and then heâs back.
The cake aisle is his favourite one. You steer him clearly away from the childrenâs cakes, because heâs sure you saw the light in his eyes when he noticed the Marvel cake.Â
âCan we get chocolate?â He asks, and you shrug.
âI donât know. You know what Kaylee likes?â You step a bit closer to the shelves, peering at the different boxes.
Keigo hums, tapping the corner of his chin. He walks around the cart until heâs right next to you. âHow about that? Red velvet. And it looks cute.â He points to the one near you, arm reaching over and brushing against yours.
âHm. Yes. Thatâs- Yes. Red velvet.â You nod.
Keigo glances at you and he finds the two of you are closer than he realised. He thinks if he leans in just slightly youâll be kissing. He smiles, soft and sweet.Â
âYou look pretty this close.â
âSo I look ugly from afar?â You joke, but you sound nervous.
Keigo's eyes dart to your lips. Itâs so quick but he sees the way your cheeks flush. âYou never look ugly. Donât I compliment you enough?â
You shove him away softly, reaching for the red velvet cake.
âEnough out of you. Go grab candles.â
And Keigo does, in the next aisle over, and hopes you canât hear him coughing up another handful of petals.Â
âââ
The two of you finish up quickly, despite Keigoâs efforts to long out the day as much as he can. The coughing only gets worse, and heâs surprised you havenât noticed the amount of times he disappears to hack up his lungs around the nearest corner.
But itâs fine, he tells himself. This is about you, about helping you. He can deal with this problem later.Â
You, who are sitting across from him in the tiniest table known to man at his favourite yakitori place. Part of him is a little annoyed about the whole âcivilian disguiseâ, because whenever the owner sees itâs him he always gets a few extra sticks. But he canât complain. Your legs are touching his, seeing as youâd shoved the both of you in the farthest corner of the shop possible. Which also happens to be the smallest in the shop.
âOkay, so, when we get back Iâll set up everything and weâre done!â You speak around a mouthful of food, chicken almost falling onto the table.
He nods, mouth also full. âPerfect. And youâre sure you donât need help setting up?â
You shake your head. âI should be good, thereâs not that much to do.â
You place the now empty stick on the table, dusting your hands. âThanks for this, Hawks. Really.âÂ
He just smiles. âDon't mention it. Anything for my favourite assistant.â
âArenât I your only assistant?â
âSo? Youâd still be my favourite if I had more.âÂ
You snort, picking up another stick. âSure, sure.â
The grocery bags crinkle beneath the table. And like this, without his wings and without any eyes on him Keigo can be selfish and pretend like this is real.Â
You glance around the restaurant. âI like this place. Why havenât we come here before?â
Keigo shrugs, polishing off another two sticks. âItâs usually busy around our lunch time. We should come more though.â
You nod. âDefinitely. Thereâs this ramen place too, we should go there. Itâs by that supermarket we went to.â
Itâs so casual, so calm, and his heart is racing.Â
âOh! I found this song. I think youâll like it.â
You dig in your purse and pull out the same ratty wired earphones he makes fun of you for everyday. He rolls his eyes and you glare at him.
âNo. Shut up.â
âJust let me buy you a nice pair of AirPods, babe. Seriously, these are dying.â He flicks the wire thatâs covered in tape and you tut, pushing his hands away.
âNever. I'm a wired earphone supporter till I die. Come here.â
You scoot your chair closer to the table, but they donât really reach. âFuck. Okay, wait.â
You stand up, dragging your chair so itâs right up next to his. You sit down, and your hand comes up to brush his hair out of the way so you can press the earphone in his ear. And if you see his breath hitch you donât say anything. Just hit play, your own earphone in.
And the pure bliss of having you this close, close enough that he can smell the sweet scent of your perfume, lasts about a minute before he starts coughing.
He reels it back as much as he can, wincing as he swallows the petals that try to crawl their way out his throat. He drinks water, washing away the taste of metal from his mouth and he barely even registers your hand on his shoulder.
âHawks? Are you alright?â Thereâs panic clear as day on your face, and he nods.
âY-Yes. Donât worry, I think I just swallowed a piece of chicken wrong.â
Youâre not convinced as easily as before. âThat didnât sound normal, Hawks. Should we take you to the doctor?â
âNo, itâs fine, babe. I promise.âÂ
He holds up his pinkie. You just stare at him for a moment, eyes searching for a lie. But you seem to believe him, because your hand comes up and your finger curls around his.
ââ-
The party is going well, he thinks.
Kaylee looks happy. You did well with the decorations, as best as you could do with an office room and an hour. Thereâs pink balloons and streamers that Keigo wants to scream that he bought with you. But thatâs stupid and desperate, so he doesnât.Â
Youâd all sang and cheered as she blew out her candles. She looked nice but Keigo couldnât keep his eyes off you, grinning so hard it was like your face was about to split in half. People were milling about now. Keigo likes to think he knows all his employees but heâd be lying if he said he recognised every face that had come to greet him.
There is one face he could recognise anywhere.
âBirdbrain! What are you doing here?â
Rumiâs voice is loud and full of energy, and he canât help but mirror the grin on her face the second she claps him on the back.
âItâs almost like this is my agency.â He raises his eyebrows. âWhat are you doing here?â
âKaylee and I know each other from ages ago. She used to intern when I was working with Best Jeanist.â
Keigo nods. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees a guy approaching you. One of the office workers he canât name. His wings are back on his body and he wishes he could send one over to listen to what youâre talking about.
âBut- Are you even listening to me?â Rumi says.
âYes. I am.â
âNo. Youâre not.âÂ
Rumi follows his eyeline, to where youâre handing out slices of cake. She nods, understandingly. âI see. Have you asked her out?â
âWhat? No. Why would I- Sheâs my assistant.â Keigo splutters.
Rumi laughs, clapping him on the shoulder once more. âOh, Hawks. Has positions of power ever stopped you before?â
Keigo frowns. âNo, itâs not like that. Iâm not trying to just hook up with her.â
âOh.â Rumi looks at you again. âYou actually like her?â
âYes. No. Itâs- Itâs complicated.â
Rumi hums thoughtfully. The two of them were quite blatantly staring at you now, and Keigo is sure youâd be quite weirded out if you caught them. But he doesnât need to worry about that, because your attention is stolen away by some guy. Keigo doesnât even know his name because heâs some irrelevant worker that doesnât even matter.
But he seems to matter to you. Because you are smiling and laughing, and you nudge his shoulder when he says something Keigo itches to hear.
âWell. Maybe try telling her. She wonât wait around forever.â Rumi nods towards you and he shakes his head.
âThatâs⊠I donât- Just leave it.â Keigoâs voice sounds bitter in a way heâs not used to, and Rumi peers at him.
âBirdbrain? You doing okay there?â
Heâs not. How could Keigo be doing okay, when Rumi is annoyingly right? You wonât wait forever. Keigo doesnât even have forever. He has a few weeks left if his research is correct. And for some dumb reason Keigo didnât seem to think about the fact that he might live to see you with someone else.
You move slightly closer to him, and Keigoâs fist clenches.Â
He doesnât even know the guy, but can he be surprised? Youâre perfect, youâre you. It makes sense that heâs not the only one in love with you. Keigo sees the hand this guy places on your elbow, the way he smiles at you whenever you laugh. He knows that look because itâs how he looks at you everyday.Â
And then it starts. Slow and slight. It stirs in his lungs, just a tickle, but he knows, he knows what comes next.
Rumi notices the way his face pales, and she shakes his arm. âHawks? Youâre freaking me out, whatâs wrong?â
And he tries to answer, but all that comes out is a choking noise he canât even recognise as a sound his own body made. And the feeling builds up all too quickly, and Keigo thinks he might be dying. Heâs rushing out the room to try and make it to the bathroom, but he doesnât make it further than out the door, because the pain in his chest is splitting, like somebody is trying to push their way out of his skin. He drops to the knees and he clutches at his stomach, and he coughs and coughs and thereâs blood, and thereâs flowers now, fully grown flowers-
And then everything goes dark.
ââââââ
Keigo opens his eyes to the bright white ceiling of a hospital room. Itâs not something he hasnât seen before, and the slow blink back to life and the few seconds of peace before the pain kicks in are always the worst. He blinks harshly before slowly, slowly sitting up, arms almost buckling from his weight.Â
He hates the weakness that comes with injury, the embarrassment. If he was still training at the commission they wouldâve sent him back on the field before heâd even gotten up. But, he doubts heâd have gotten a disease quite like this over there.
Itâs only after heâs pushed himself into a sitting position that he sees you.Â
Arms crossed as your head leans back against the wall behind you, asleep. He has no idea how long itâs been, but judging by the fact youâre still wearing the clothes you were wearing in the office, he assumes itâs the same day. He glances out the window and its pitch black.
And you look beautiful. Even with the mascara smudged beneath your eyes, the worry on your face even visible in your sleep. Keigo looks away, but not before you wake up and catch him staring. You blink like you might be dreaming, before you bring your chair closer to him.
âHawks. Youâre- Youâre awake.â You whisper the words like if you say them too loudly they might not be true.
He smiles as best as he can. âHey, pretty. The party still going on without me?â He tries for a joke but your eyes prick with tears.Â
âDonât. Donât joke right now. Nothing about this is funny.â You sound serious in a way heâs never heard before, and some sick, twisted part of himself is giddy that itâs all for him.
âYou promised you were fine.â
Keigo wants to turn away because the hurt on your face is his fault.
âIâm sorry. I just-â He sighs. âDid you see?â
âYes.â
âDid anyone else see?â
âNo. Rumi stopped them from coming out into the hall.â
He nods. You shake your head, hand coming up to rub at your eyes.Â
âHow long has it been?â He asks.
You check your watch. âItâs one in the morning so. About six hours.â
Keigo falters. âWait- Youâve been here for six hours?â
You frown. âWell obviously. I- They said Iâm your emergency contact. And someone had to be here to tell you what the doctor said.â
He knows already. From the sharp pain in his chest he knows.
âIâm assuming you know itâs Hanahaki?â
He nods. You nod.
âYou-â You curse. It takes a few moments for you to get the words out.
âHe said you donât have long. The petals, he said theyâre starting to look like flowers. Fully grown ones. And that means youâre in the final stages.â Your voice cracks and Keigo thinks he might throw up again.
âOkay.â
You pause. âOkay? Is that all you have to say? Okay?â
Keigo frowns. âY/N, I-â
âDo you not get it, Hawks? Youâre going to die. He says youâre going to die if you donât either tell the person or- get the surgery done.â
Keigo shakes his head immediately. âIâm not doing the surgery.â
Your lip quivers and you pull yourself even closer. Your hand grabs his and itâs cold where his is warm, and you squeeze.Â
âYou have to, Hawks. The world canât lose you. I canât lose you.â You whisper.
And your words sound so raw, so vulnerable, and it tears at his inside more than the roses growing inside them.
âJust try. Try, okay? Tell them how you feel and see. It- It might be reciprocated. It definitely will be. I mean, who wouldnât be in love with you?â You laugh wetly, eyes glistening with unshed tears.
But thereâs something else behind them.
Jealousy.
And thereâs a small flicker of hope that grows beneath his bones. And he looks at you then, at the tears that gather on the bottom of those fluttering eyelashes. And he reaches up, brushes the curve of your cheek.
And your breath hitches. He feels the heat on your face from how close he is, and he thinks he might cry.
âItâs not fair.â His voice sounds so weak, so awfully weak and he wants to scream.Â
âWhat is? Whatâs not fair?â You ask.
âI canât tell her. I donât deserve her.â
You look so confused. Like heâs said the dumbest thing in the world. âWhat?â
âIâm not- I work almost everyday, and when I am off Iâm too tired to do anything. My place is more of a prison cell than an apartment. I- Iâve never even been in a relationship before. Never even thought about it. I canât- Iâm not allowed, Y/N.â
And now his voice cracks and your hand squeezes tighter. And his voice sounds unfamiliar. This desperation, the frantic panic that fights against his words is so unlike him. Keigo has never been vulnerable with anybody in his life, but that look in your eyes makes him feel like he can tell you everything. All the dirty horrible secrets he keeps locked inside himself.
âItâs not fair. I donât know if I can even be there for someone. Itâs why I never said anything, I didnât want to mess up a relationship thatâs so important for me for one I canât even commit to. Itâs not fair on you, Y/N. You deserve better.â
He feels like thereâs a weight thatâs left his shoulder when he finishes speaking, rambled words he can barely remember. Heâs out of breath when heâs done. Waiting anxiously for you to say something. Maybe this real version of Keigo is too much for you. He has half a mind to tell you it was just a joke, he didnât mean it if it means youâll stop looking so shocked. Keigo just needs you to say something.
âI deserve better?â
He doesnât expect that. âWhat?â He says, confused.
You swallow roughly and he watches the sharp lines of your throat as you do so. âYou said âyou deserve betterâ. You as in, me. As in⊠Iâm the one you have feelings for?â
Shit.
âI- Did I say that? I think itâs the medicine, itâs making me all-â
âAre you in love with me, Hawks?â
The room isnât silent. The machines heâs hooked up to all make a low humming noise, and he can hear people and nurses walking and talking outside. But when you say those words it feels like the world has stopped.Â
He could lie. But Keigo wonât get the surgery, so he figures he might as well let you know how he feels before he dies.
âYes.â
You freeze for a moment. Then your hands come up to cover your face and he immediately misses the contact. And then your shoulders start shaking and he thinks you're crying.
Keigo sighs. âItâs not that awful of a thing. No reason to cry.â
âIâm not crying. Iâm laughing.â
When you look back up at him there are in fact tears running down your face, but you look happy. And hope claws its way out of him.
âThis funny to you?â
âNo. Your stupidity is, though.âÂ
Keigo is quiet for a moment, confused. âDo you mind elaborating on that?â
âHawks, do you think itâs normal that I do all your paperwork with you? Or that we get lunch together almost everyday? Do you think any other assistant in all of Japan would stay as late as their boss, especially when heâs a top ten Pro hero who rarely finishes before ten in the evening?â
âI-â
âDo you think itâs normal that I wear this necklace you bought me everyday?â And you reach into your shirt and pull it out, the gold catching against the light.
âHawks, I spend every waking second Iâm in that agency with you if I can help it. Iâve had job offers a million times better than what I do for you, and Iâve rejected every single one because I wanted to be with you.â
Keigo doesnât say anything. You grab his hand again, but it feels a little more threatening this time.
âYou donât get to decide if I deserve you or not, I do. Itâs- I canât believe you. I donât care about all that. Weâll figure it out together.â
And Keigo just closes his eyes, because this canât be real. He must be dreaming, because Keigo doesnât get things like this. Love. Nothing like that look on your face thatâs all for him.
âYou sure you're not just saying this because Iâm dying?â
And you laugh, and let your tears fall freely, and Keigo can finally breathe clearly for the first time in months.
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this is for lysa if ur anyone else stop reading...?
JKKKKK guys i love hawks so much i can't explain... he was my lover for so long i miss him
also i loved writing this i literally did it in ONE NIGHT?? plz give me more ideas pookas
LOVE U ALLL HAVE A GOOD NIGHT
Soooooo guys, I did this minicomic
Pt 1/5
[X] / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5
Hope yâall like it
wait okay blurb idea, we could all use more teenage keigo content on our tlâs so maybe like 17-19 yr old hawks showing the ropes to a new commission recruit bc the president asked him to? liKE THINK OF THE SPARRING/TRAINING SESSIONS !!
i've been thinking about this ever since you sent it in omfgnidosg
warnings: language as usual, general awkwardness, awkward first love (im sorry) reader has wing related quirk!
when you first met hawks, it was the first time the president had seen him speechless. it wasn't like he wasn't around the opposite gender, he trains with females and males an even amount. and you considered yourself pretty average looking-- nothing anybody would fawn or envy over.
the room was silent for a good couple of moments before he even opened his mouth to speak. madame president interrupted him before he could get any words out; "this is [y/n]. please give them a tour, then show them to their room."
she was always cold, ever since you had met her weeks ago. it's not like you expected a warmer welcome after being handed off, but still-- you can't help the curl of your lip in distaste after she dismisses herself, the plumage of green hanging behind you fluttering with agitation.
you've heard about hawks. even if you didn't want to, you always saw him around. on the outside, he was confident, cocky-- funny-- but the guy in front of you? awkward mess. it was endearing to see the veil melt so quickly the second the president leaves you in the room with him.
he stutters when he finally speaks. "hey."
the corner of your mouth lifts and you fail to muffle the chuckle that leaves your lips. "hey," you reply with a small wave of your fingers. your eyes fall to the side, your wings ruffle behind you. "after you," you add after a moment, your hand out in front of you to gesture for him to lead you out.
hawks doesn't talk a lot during the tour.
he has to clear his throat every time the two of you arrive to a new location, though it's obvious he's working through and trying very hard to control the stutter and shake of his voice. it's somewhat cute and endearing, though it creates a comfortable warmth in your cheekbones and a buzz in the base of your spine.
he is not smooth in the slightest when he shows you to your room. shifting feet in the same place, his hand rubbing at the back of his neck, blwoing at the one curl that falls in front of his eyes no matter what he does to push it back.
in the year that follows, the two of you become fast and close friends. he rises easily through the top ten and settles at number three while you're content where you're at in the lower twenties. you still meet for lunch sometimes and get scheduled for patrol with each other, but ever since the two of you were seventeen; you couldn't remember the last time the two of you got to train together.
just shy of your nineteeth birthday, hawks corners you just outside your office at the HPSC.
you hear the flutter before you actually hear him. "hey you."
you balance the small mound of paperwork on your hip, your tongue pokes at the inside of your cheek. one of his feathers manages to lazily land on top of the stack in your arms, you only dust it away with a click of your tongue. "you've been busy."
he has. out on more missions lately, more patrols in highly crowded areas-- like the commission is sending some message about the two of you.
you lean on the wall outside your office, your wings flick lazily behind you. hawks always had a habit of pulling on them, taking a feather for himself just for shits and giggles, even if you do punch him for how much it hurts. you steal one for yourself in retaliation every time.
his hands are shoved into his pockets, and he doesn't quite meet your eyes. there's a faint twinge of pink across his nose-- he doesn't normally blush. by now he's more popular with the ladies, he's used to getting attention.
but this is you.
"i know your birthday's soon," his voice is just above a whisper, you have to lean in to catch the end of it. he leans away from you out of reflex, and the tint across his nose gets darker.
keigo's wings twitch.
ever since meeting him and being paired with him in training and having to be around him, you've gotten more perceptive to how his wings and feathers seem to talk for him. he's gotten better at controlling it in the year or so since you've first met him, but you know his tells like the back of your hand.
"repeat that again?" your voice is low as you tease him, the corner of your mouth lifts in that stupid little smirk that hawks finds infuriatingly attractive.
"your birthday is soon," he has to force out, his throat bobs as he visibly swallows. "i want to do something for you."
"oh!" you don't mean to sound so⊠stunned. but you're a little surprised. why would he want to celebrate your birthday with you? he refused to let you celebrate his.
"don't ask."
your mouth closes, cutting off the question on the tip of your tongue. you don't miss how his hands shake slightly when he removes them from his pockets, doing his dorky little finger guns-- he does that to alleviate awkward tension. it works just the slightest bit.
"i'll see you? i'll come get you, just wear something comfortable."
he doesn't let you respond. he's down the hall before you can get your vocal chords to make any sort of noise. his eyes catch yours before he turns the corner, however-- the flutter that's usually in your wings is now in your heart.
you can't help but smile. genuinely.
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âThe Forestâ â The Fable Oracle (in production) c.e.