Springloadedcoffin - Embry

A few of the more creative spellings of Christmas I’ve come across while looking for Dear Santa letters in old newspapers this year.

him: you better not be too wordy when I get there

my helplessly verbose and over-articulate, endlessly expounding posterior:

"lol tiktok users would rather learn mandarin than come to tumblr" yeah man that's crazy. who would have thought that people from the video-based dopamine-machine app wouldn't decide to join the text- and image- based no-algorithm website?

It's so fucking funny how many people who owned Furbies as children ended up being traumatized by them in some way

The older generation's fixation on forcing you to have kids is something they absolutely refuse to unlearn. You can give the calmest and most reasonable explanation for not having kids and the only thing they can think to say is, "But what of the heir to the lands?" "Who will inherit the throne?" "Please sire upon your barren death there will be a parochial schism that will soak our soils with brother-blood." They literally hate to see you happy with just a cat.

People: Effie loved being an escort. She was so brainwashed. She probably applied for the job because she thought it was an honor to be an escort, to gain fame and feed her ego.

Effie in the whole SOTR book:

so i found a pitman shorthand translator last night

I used to try and resist what comes naturally to my writing, fearing judgement. I have learned that, through writing what I am passionate, I get stuff done. This is your sign to add that thing to your WIP. You know what that thing is to you.

bro we're so fucked they just integrated a ticking clock into the background music

Straight people: Just because they enjoy the others touch doesn't mean they are gay

The "straight" people in question: