Old Man Mcgucket Is The Loneliest Person In All Of Gravity Falls. And It’s Not By Choice. I Mean, He’s

HOW THE FUCK DID I JUST WAKE UP TO 99+ NOTIFICATINOS WHERE DID YOU MFS COME FROM?????

old man mcgucket stops playing his banjo at 8. nobody really knows why. all they know is that when it’s 8 o clock, he stops playing his banjo and goes inside to work on something else. and when i say “nobody” that includes fiddleford himself. he doesn’t really remember why he can’t play his banjo past 8, but what he does know is that it’s a firm rule. even if there’s nobody there to enforce it, he just knows within himself that he’s not supposed to. so he doesn’t.

sometimes fiddleford looks at his cubix cube. it’s solved, it always is, but something nags at him to check. it feels like it’s supposed to be scrambled, but it’s not. he doesn’t really want to scramble it himself but it’s like a step in the process is gone. he solves it. he leaves it alone. something happens? he comes back to it scrambled. he solves it. but now it just sits off to the side, untouched. it’s confusing.

sometimes fiddleford sees something interesting. he thinks that it would be a perfect gift for someone. but he doesn’t know who that someone is. it’s just a blank where their name should be. but he gets these things anyways. maybe someday he’ll remember who they are and be able to fill in the blanks. give them all of the gifts he’s collected over the years. finally understand who he used to be.

why is it that every time he makes gloves, whether it’s with crochet or leather, they end up with six fingers?

why is it that every time he finds something strange or out of the ordinary, he feels a sense of nostalgia?

why is it that every time he goes exploring into the forest, he feels a sense of something missing?

why is it that he just feels so alone?

the answer is simple.

old man mcgucket is just a crazy hillbilly.

the town kook.

he doesnt know anything.

he can’t be fixed.

just ignore him.

just don’t look at him.

just leave him alone.

me:oouuuughh i wanna read lost legends so bad. i have to. its literally on our bookshelf i need to- also me:NO. ITS STILL LIGHT OUT. me:WHY DO WE HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL ITS DARK OUT TO READ. THAT MAKES NO SENSE. also me:I DONT KNOW BUT YOURE WAITING ANOTHER TWO HOURS WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. me:BUT SHANKLIN- also me:SHANKLIN CAN WAIT UNTIL ITS DARK. HES NOCTURNAL ANYWAYS STUPID.

me:shut up.

oh you guys seemed to like the other stan post i made so. heres this i also did a few days ago

just some shading practice i guess

alright let me take a crack at this

there are a few plot holes that we need to avoid here. and by a few i mean a good amount.

stan’s criminal record. nobody would want to take the identity of someone who still has jail time to serve. so this will have to be an au where a. it takes place before stan turns to crime or b. stan doesn’t commit crime at all. or a secret third option where ford doesn’t even realize how much of a criminal stan is until he’s too far in and has to learn how to run from the cops.

the fingers. nobody in gravity falls ever noticed that ford had 6 fingers, so it was easy for them to just go with a normal guy who had 5. but someone with 5 fingers seeming to randomly grow an extra finger? strange. especially since stan is much more sociable than ford. the guy who’s known for being super talkative and knows everyone in town suddenly locks himself away in his house? also strange.

stanley needs to be out of the picture one way or another. probably not dead?

ford needs a motive. this has two parts two it. a. he needs a reason to leave his old identity behind and b. he needs a reason to take stan’s identity specifically.

so with all of this in mind. i give you this.

stan gets to gravity falls before ford does. thinks “hey this place isn’t on any maps. no cops will find me here!”

settles in. makes a good living off of being a tourist trap.

he uses the bill summoning thing as another attraction. Very Stupid Idea.

bill comes to make a deal with stan. thinks “hey look there’s a guy i can con.”

stan gets approached by bill for a deal. thinks “hey look there’s a guy i can con.”

stan goes missing

ford arrives to gravity falls.

ford does not have grant money. people don’t believe in his weirdness theory because they think he’s just talking about the tourist trap that used to be there for a while.

finds an old abandoned shack.

investigates old abandoned shack.

“hey wait a minute. not only are there scraps of proof for my theory, but these are stan’s belongings!”

ford thinks. nobody takes him seriously. people don’t seem to take stan’s disappearance seriously either.

“hey! what if i took on his identity, reopened the tourist trap, and used this footing for money and such while i look for stan?”

and thus. ford takes stan’s identity, runs the tourist trap and tries to look for his brother.

the excuse for the fingers is that he had a run in with some kind of magical creature. it gifted him with extra dexterity in the form of extra fingers. everyone loves it.

ford learns to run from the cops. something he never thought he would have to do.

You know what? We have Stanley pretending to be Stanford for a long ass time

Now give me an AU where Stanford pretends to be Stanley. I don't know man, like he wasn't anyone you could even pretend to be. Stanley is a nobody. Basically.

So this AU would be where he is someone somewhere and Stanford has to pretend to be him. Why? I don't know, figure it out.

another video.. yaaay

i just watched an entire simpsons episode with my father for 3 seconds of bill cipher telling us to buy crypto we both agreed it was 100% worth it

i <3 these crazy bitches (they desperately need anti-psychotics)

stupid idiot.

i’m thinking about him again..